Comments on: Dying to be Light?

By: :)

:) — Mon, 20 Jun 2011 12:21:49 +0000

*run my fingers* *without them getting caught*- other typos are there because it’s a lenghty write-up.

By: :)

:) — Mon, 20 Jun 2011 12:20:39 +0000

Pls shutup about relaxers because I know the tears I shed from combing my hair when I was natural and how happy I was when I put the relaxer in. I was happy to run my hands through my scalp without it gettin caught. There was no image of a white or bi-racial woman in my head or of a dark skinned woman because I am light. There was just agony then relief. When I wore my hair short, guys still loved it but I knew the stress of getting up to use the curling iron in the morning to get the style I wanted that fit the shape of my face so I tried a weave and it was a style I liked that permanently fit my face and it was brush and go. So please stop making us look stupid to other races and making them think we have a disease. People use relaxers and hair extensions for different reasons I have never heard of anyone that saw a white girl or woman and thought “oh, I must look like her!” I don’t even notice white people, I notice beautiful black women that her blessed with naturally beautiful features. Please stop making up stories about women choosing versitility in hair styles and experimenting with their look over one hair style. It is only a razz unexposed person that thinks white women do not wear weaves or use relaxers or that they all have straight and long hair. When I was in secondary school I prefered the two step all back or 6 simple big cornrows to any hairstyle, I disliked any other hair style, what was I trying to be then please? DOn’t be silly. We as women just want to express ourselves and have looks that fit us and enhance our beauty or looks that make us stand out. To dissect that and diagnose it as anything else is pure foolishness. It is annoying especially for someone like me who’s face can completely change depending on hair style and I love the ability to look brand new and different without having to think it through like my life depends on it. Sheesh! You will be judged with the severity with which you judge your fellow man remember that! I think a lot of us fall prey to lightening creams when trying to treat discolorations so when u say “trying to be white” you lose a large percentage of the audience you are trying to educate because they automatically feel you are not speaking to them. So I will say this: Wmen of all races and ethnicities; lightnening creams are dangerous but they were created for reasons besides “pure evil”. In trying to clear our blotches, blemishes, spots, discolorations we should be careful in the choices we make and the things we get carried away with. Stay away from hydroquinine, use sunscreen, it is safer to work with your dermatologist because he or she will guide you and if misguided you can sue. Lol… Just keep it simple and when you achieve your results do not get carried away, go on a maintenance program if you must or stop and allow your skin adapt to it’s new form. Features make a person beutiful, not complexion. I have been in rooms with dark skinned friends who were chosen over me because they were beautiful and of course when I was chosen it was because I was light skinned, because it helped their self esteem. My self esteem is very high and people around me can be pointed out as beautiful, but I know my beauty has it’s own room where it shines because I am beautiful too. Some hair styles bring out my beauty some tone it down and make me more approachable. I work to improve myself personality wise and physically, to even out my skin and grow my hair, but at no point in my life has the thought cross my mind to be like any race other than that which I am.

By: Dayspring

Dayspring — Thu, 28 Jan 2010 06:56:04 +0000

Actually, white skinned women sometimes have the opposite problem of wanting to make their skin darker. What white girl doesn’t want that “perfect tan” for the beach in the summer. Tanning can also lead to a negative outcome, that is, skin cancer, yet many do it anyway. I for one have had to change my ideas about beauty, and appreciate my natural color. There is always the temporary fake tan if you really want it.

I think what dark skinned women are doing by using these products is crazy, especially since there are so many gorgeous dark skinned women, especially in Africa. A glowing complexion is so much more important.

What are we doing, here? Trying to stand out in the crowd? It seems like we are demanding the impossible from our women the world over!

If it is evenness you need, which we all want, I know that the Mary Kay brand makes a couple products that even out skin tone while not changing it, and they are of course safe for your skin. They are not $5 a bottle, however.

By: pkmelody

pkmelody — Fri, 08 Jan 2010 06:07:48 +0000

The idea of white beauty is a global issue. Self hatered is the worst mental illness

By: WALE ADENIJI

WALE ADENIJI — Sun, 20 Sep 2009 13:12:13 +0000

Me too. I want to know those options to have a even skin colour.I am fair and hate bleaching knowing the after-effect in the long-run. Can you share that with us? I know a lot of people who pass through here will appreciate that piece of information from you,Vivian.

By: black is beautiful

black is beautiful — Sat, 25 Jul 2009 02:34:05 +0000

I always feel sorry for Lil Kim. What kind of self-hatred does it take to do that to yourself?

By: Tumi Jẹgẹdẹ

Tumi Jẹgẹdẹ — Thu, 09 Jul 2009 19:00:55 +0000

http://twobeautifulminds.blogspot.com/2009/04/bleaching.html

By: Tumi Jẹgẹdẹ

Tumi Jẹgẹdẹ — Thu, 09 Jul 2009 19:00:26 +0000

It’s such a shame.. but you know what, it happens. 75% is shocking to me, but I believe it, most women would have considered it. If not for a full change of look, just to lighten those dark knees and elbows, or to ‘even’ skintone. All these are terms that could lure people who initially don’t even want to lighten into the world of bleaching.

I would like to draw attention to asian women, it’s not just black/African women who have this issue. Asian women deal with the same, the lighter you are, the prettier you are considered to be, it’s the same in India, Japan..

Have you heard of nipple pink-ners??

Here’s a blog post relating to this issue that I posted..

By: J

Sun, 31 May 2009 10:24:55 +0000

Could you share those please, because I want an even complexion not lighter, I’m happy with being dark, love it. Black pride!

By: hw

hw — Sun, 26 Apr 2009 18:57:53 +0000

These days, there seems to be only light and dark, not the in-betweens, like Michelle Obama. She is not dark but of medium complexion and I think the distinction should be made. So-called “Black” people run the gamut of shades and I think that prejudice is morphing again. When people of medium shade are now considered “dark,” one can surmise that the rift is getting wider. Sad, all shades should be celebrated for what they are.

By: hw

hw — Sun, 26 Apr 2009 18:54:51 +0000

Doctors have prescribed hydroquinone like Eldoquine Forte for years for acne scarring. People are not using prescription drugs and are misusing these chemicals. Hydroquinone does not have to be dangerous…only in misuse.

By: Bridget Oti

Bridget Oti — Sat, 18 Apr 2009 23:28:02 +0000

so much for black pride! if it aint no black skin

By: ola

ola — Fri, 17 Apr 2009 00:41:41 +0000

i met a white lady who came 2 naija recently,it wz my 1st tym of bn dt close.d truthz i’l never wish 2 b as white or blue-eyed as she is.v always bn proud of my race,wl continu 2 b.i stand 2 b corrected.

By: Cici

Cici — Wed, 15 Apr 2009 01:30:14 +0000

The main standard of beauty is still the white skin, then light skin or brown skin. That is the reason in some countries like Asia, they bleach their skin just to fit that pale white color standard of beauty. The white, blonde, blue eyes is what has been considered the standard of beauty for years, and has been put in people’s minds. Unconsciously, many people try to live up to that standard, so they can get the attention or acknowledgement that certain people with these features are getting. Whites have done a good job praising their skin color, texture of hair, shape of nose, and refer to the brown or dark skin, big or flat nose, coarse hair as unattractive, and this has messed up people of color mainly black people so much, that in order for things to change, it’s not physical anymore, black people will have to change their mindsets. When a person of color especially a black person is considered beautiful by mainstream media, it is because they see what they call white features in them, maybe the colored eyes, light or brown skin, or the hair texture. It is very unfortunate that black people are even the ones who hate their negro or African features the most, so we can’t blame it all on the media or whites, even though it goes back to slavery, but we should move forward not backward. If we black people did not buy into the whole standard of beauty,by wanting to fit into what we are told is beautiful, whites won’t have any choice but get used to and accept us the way we are. One of the things that stood out to me about First Lady, Michelle Obama, is the fact that she’s dark skin, has what some people might call the negro features, but her confidence, intelligence, the way she carrys herself, highly educated, and the way Barack Obama admires her made people from all over the world fall in love with her. People who had negative comments to say about her were just insecure and ignorant. All of these standards are just made by people. Certain people who wanted to feel and be superior by putting others down. Remember that God made us, in different shades of skin color, blonde, curly, wavy, coarse hair, blue, brown, hazel, green eye color, it’s not a mistake in whatever skin, shape, you have, and God does not make any superior, or better than the other, because they are all beautiful in God’s eyes.

By: Inez

Inez — Fri, 10 Apr 2009 12:52:00 +0000

Hello, that should be a personal decision. There’s nothing African or unafrican about bleaching, extensions, contacts, nails and all the other stuff women love to adorn themselves with. White women bleach, use extensions, contacts, fix nails and the like so nobody should make it sound like we’re trying to imitate. Regarding complexions, you’re beautiful if you are beautiful, complexion notwithstanding. I am dark skinned and I still have men tripping. My younger sis is very light skinned, we walk into a place and we have men coming either for me or for her. It’s a matter of what appeals to them. Complexion isn’t all they look for.

By: Michaela Moye

Michaela Moye — Wed, 08 Apr 2009 11:50:05 +0000

It might be the ‘mammy water’ complex.

By: Michaela Moye

Michaela Moye — Wed, 08 Apr 2009 11:48:44 +0000

Well said, sister!

By: Michaela Moye

Michaela Moye — Wed, 08 Apr 2009 11:46:46 +0000

I must agree with you! I grew up yellow and curve less with brown hair! I spoke no pidgin and was constantly teased by my neighbours for not being Nigerian enough! Nigerians have all sorts of skin tones, eye colour and hair textures! Abi what will i say about my Ijebu relatives with green and grey eyes? As far as i know they are not multi racial.

By: Michaela Moye

Michaela Moye — Wed, 08 Apr 2009 11:43:00 +0000

I feel you! Take Ebony magazine for instance, black power ranting side by side with Vantex bleaching cream and Raveen relaxer ads.

On the other hand, if it’s any compensation, white people are crazy for tans!

By: BridgetOti

BridgetOti — Tue, 07 Apr 2009 01:47:42 +0000

so much for black pride!