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BN Hot Topic: “I’m Tired! I Don’t Want to Do Again” Is There A Good Way to Break Up?

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There are no guarantees in life. Absolutely NONE, so as much as possible I like to encourage people to be as happy as they can. I mean, life is too short to be unhappy or even stay in an unhappy relationship!

Yeah, that’s where I was actually going. I just wanted to appear really serious in the first two lines of this piece*chuckles*.  So let me give you guys the gist.  I was having drinks a few weeks ago with my friends and the issue of relationships  came up.  My friend had told his girl friend of 2 years that he needed some space. Truly, the babe gave him the space he needed. They weren’t seeing each other and they were just sending each other messages every now and again. Nothing intense, or serious so dude assumed he’d been let off the hook.  At this point, I sipped my really intoxicating Long Island and smiled… “Femi! You’re a bad person. Why didn’t you just tell her you wanted to break up! How hard is that?”

I was about to launch into a tirade on how he was a coward and couldn’t face his situation like a man and just tell his girlfriend that it just wasn’t working out any more.  Then, I remembered he’d actually tried about 8 months before that. The babe sent people to talk to him. How she loved him, how she was going to change, how nobody was perfect and *cough* how they were meant to be together.  They got back together after that and my poor friend had just been suffering in silence.  Res Ipsa Loquitor. My question answered itself.

Is there really a good way to break up with someone? There are some relationships that start out as just  “having a good time” sarewa. Usually, one person gets to the end of the “good time” before the other person and then the whole trying to extricate yourself from the “situation” becomes untidy and messy, complete with name callings, hurling of eggs and smashing of windshields!

Someone argued that some of those ‘good time’ relationships have potentials, if you’re patient enough. For some others, they say they’re just sitting it through.

So how do you break up with a person when you feel you’re being stifled? Is there really a GOOD way to say you’d like to move on. I was going to say nobody uses Dear John’s any more and then I remembered my friend whose fiance broke off their engagement via an email. Some people say they’ve managed to remain chum buds with their exes! I guess the break up wasn’t brutal or maybe one person is still lying to her/himself.

Let’s talk! What’s the worst way you’ve ever been dumped? What’s the worst way you’ve ever dumped someone? Do you subscribe to the idea of openly saying “Babe! I’m tired. Let’s give it a rest” Or are you like my friend, Jide, who says “I’ll just keep behaving like a jerk till she gets the message and moves on!”

Ouch!

 Photo credit:  dangerouslee.biz

You probably wanna read a fancy bio? But first things first! Atoke published a book titled, +234 - An Awkward Guide to Being Nigerian. It's available on Amazon. ;)  Also available at Roving Heights bookstore. Okay, let's go on to the bio: With a Masters degree in Creative Writing from Swansea University, Atoke hopes to be known as more than just a retired foodie and a FitFam adherent. She can be reached for speechwriting, copywriting, letter writing, script writing, ghost writing  and book reviews by email – [email protected]. She tweets with the handle @atoke_ | Check out her Instagram page @atoke_ and visit her website atoke.com for more information.

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