Atoke’s Monday Morning Banter: Do You Have Load? Please Help me Carry…

Posted on Monday, January 14th, 2013 at 9:00 AM

By Atoke

Hi everyone! I hope you had a great weekend. For some inexplicable reason, there’s a certain spring in my step this morning, I feel like I can take on the world. Because I’m naturally grumpy, I’m assuming this current state of being is as a result of a well rested weekend. The only time I turned on my computer this weekend was to play a round of Bejewelled Blitz and after that it was back to lying back on the sofa, watching movies and the delightful world of instant messaging on my cell phone.  Then, my cousin sent me a message reminding me that she was coming back home on Sunday and she’d like me to pick her up from the airport. It is NOT one of my favourite errands, but I obliged because I’d missed the girl and honestly couldn’t wait to catch up on all the gist of her holiday in the UK.

The minute she entered the car, she began the lamentation. “If you see the suffer I suffered today ehn!” Let me summarize the gist for you guys. Basically, an aunt of ours  had called her last week asking if she had space in her suitcase to bring ‘some’ things to Nigeria for her.  According to aunty S, it was just “box kekere kan” (a small box). When they brought the “box kekere kan”  the poor girl was thrown into confusion. Not having money for a taxi to the airport, my dear cousin hurled her suitcases, with Aunty’s full 25kg flexi bag, across platforms, changing stations to get to the airport.

As she narrated her tale, I asked her why she didn’t say she couldn’t carry it immediately they brought the luggage. Her response was “You know Aunty S na! If I say I can’t bring the things now, that’s how it will become a full scale family matter. The real issue is, why do people put people on the spot by asking them to do things that are clearly unfair and unreasonable” I tried to cheer her up, and after plying her with Efo riro with fried plantain, she calmed down. However, it had raised a discourse in the house about the issue of  bringing things to Nigeria for people.

We asked some of our friends who came over for dinner and it ended up being a heated discussion. Apparently, it is something that a LOT of people feel very strongly about.

Why are Nigerians so unreasonable when they ask you to carry stuff for them? Don’t they know you have your own load?
Some people will give you a list of things to buy for them as if they’re the ones who bought your travel ticket
My problem is with people who expect you to start looking for them when you eventually bring the things
The worst set of people are those who ask you to use your money to buy stuff for them, thereby shortening your own shopping money rations and then to get your money back from them will be war! Mba! Never again

It’s rather unfair to tar the entire Nigerian populace with the same brush but it appears  that this is a common trend. As someone who has placed an order for a pair of shoes and had them delivered to my friend’s place for onward transmission to Lagos, and as someone who has also been given a “portmanteau” of shirts to bring back to Nigeria, I have a little experience with these things. I advised my cousin that next time, when she realizes the person’s box is by no means “little” she should just pull out the things she can carry and leave the rest. I know a lot of people who do this. However, as my friend, Tolu mentioned, some people offer to pay for one’s excess baggage as the stress that goes into carrying someone else’s kaya can’t be monetized.

At the end of the day, no man is an island and everybody needs somebody. Nevertheless, we should remember to always be considerate in our demands. Asking your friend to help you buy “5 nice shirts from Hawes & Curtis store” is implicitly saying you trust the person’s definition of “nice” so you should be open to the possibility that they may not be what you want. You must also be sure to remember that your impromptu demand for 5 shirts increases the courier’s baggage by 5 items which they didn’t plan for.

Please share your experiences on this subject and let’s have a hearty monday morning chuckle. What’s the worst thing someone has ever asked you to carry for them? What’s the most inconsiderate thing you’ve ever asked someone to bring for you across the border? (Some people will ask for 4 cartons of Indomie noodles as if the streets of Peckham are not lined with the stuff.)

Have a beautiful week ahead, remember to stay strong and positive.

Keep a smile on your face. Peace, love and cupcakes!

Toodles!

Photo credit: eu.fotolia.com

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  • 67 Comments on “Atoke’s Monday Morning Banter: Do You Have Load? Please Help me Carry…”

    Comments
    • Sonia January 14, 2013 at 9:24 AM

      Men, when I was young and couldn’t say no this Naija woman sent me with a huge Ghana must Go from yankee. It had used pajamas/clothing, open diapers, used baby stuff, just rubbish. And it was heavy. When my dad and mom saw it upon my arrival they shouted! It was terrible.
      1. My swag was messed with
      2. The strap of the GMG now cut
      3. My aunt had to BEG BA to let me fly with extra or she would’ve paid for the excess.

      My mum warned her sha and she stopped talking to me whenever I came back on holidays. Good riddance. #phew

    • Missy January 14, 2013 at 9:28 AM

      I only carry stuff for family and by family, i mean immediate family. I once carried 2 boxes for my brother and he paid for excess and cab and that is my own brother. I dont ask people(outside of family) to carry/buy things for me and no one should ask me too cos i’d politely refuse. i cant be lugging bag across platforms abeg!

    • lolly January 14, 2013 at 9:45 AM

      Yea pple do dat a lot especially family members..its so annoying..nd d thing is dat I can neva be dat inconsiderate..nd dey wnt pay 4 ur excess luggage

    • Dee January 14, 2013 at 9:50 AM

      I got on a few friends bad book because I declined carrying stuff from the US.On my last trip abroad,I had only 5 tops as mine but I ended up carrying 32kg of luggage each because I had things to drop for people in London and the US.Coming back was a different thing-I started getting BB chats from friend’s asking me to help them to either bring stuff from their family or help them buy stuff.i actually regret activating my BB abroad.But I am happy I stood my grounds on bringing stuff for people.People should learn to be considerate,paying for excess luggage won’t do it for me,who carry’s the luggage?

    • ebonie January 14, 2013 at 10:16 AM

      As a personal rule, I do not tell anyone Im traveling. Last time I was in 9ja I told everyone that asked that I bought my ticket the day before. #miOleWaKu abeg

      • Italian Princess January 14, 2013 at 10:30 AM

        Lol THIS is the way forward!

      • Monica January 15, 2013 at 2:36 PM

        agreed!!!! only let key people know you are travelling. If they ask just say you are not yet sure.

        Nigerians are a bunch of users and they use over familiarity to take the piss. Imagine people from your church asking you to carry a good 15kg worth of stuff. then you feel obliged cos they are Holy people….

    • beforesheimplodes January 14, 2013 at 10:21 AM

      LOL! At least she hadnt left her house when she got the request. The ones I cant deal with are the ‘aunties’ at the airport that refused to buy extra suitcase after shopping for the whole Nigeria. They would now be standing behind you when you want to weigh your stuff to check if you have reached the limit so they can chuck stuff into your own bag. Meh

      • Tempo January 14, 2013 at 2:42 PM

        LMAO…..Oh my dayz! are u kidding me? Naija sha….no shame what so ever. How can u ask a stranger at th airport to share their luggage. What annoys me are the folks who know they are overweight but ‘hope for a miracle’. Invest in a freaking scale!! And yeah, if it weighs 25kg at home its not going to weight less at heathrow.

      • Mz Socially Awkward... January 14, 2013 at 3:30 PM

        Ehn? Chuck stuff into where? This, my friend, is how people become drug mules without knowing. I ain’t doing that for any grandma or aunty, if dem like make dem talk say I no get respect.

      • Anon January 14, 2013 at 6:37 PM

        For me it’s the security risk!!! Heck, I don’t know you …

    • Doll January 14, 2013 at 10:23 AM

      Firstly, DO NOT announce to the whole world that you are travelling.

      Lets be honest, Nigerians aren’t known for being considerate when it comes to such things.

      Coupla years ago I had a ‘friend’ who had NEVER called me before start stalking me with phone calls once she heard from her husband through our Bible class that I had plans to travel home. I innocently told others in the Bible class that I would not be around for the next class ‘cause I was travelling home. I remember her husband asking me specifically for the date of my departure. My naive self thought he was asking as per a caring fellow Bible class member. Boy was I wrong! The following day I got a call from his wife who had never called me before. You know one of those pple you exchange numbers with, but never call? Straight away I knew why she was calling and didn’t pick up. Babe didn’t give up o. For several days early in the morning, in the afternoon and late at night she tried to reach me. Not once did I pick up. Eventually her husband called me and asked if I could take ‘just a few things’ for them. I politely told him that I had enough of my own. He left it at that. I didn’t get any more calls.

      I really do not appreciate it when people call me SOLEY because they want a favour from me.

      I have carried stuff for friends and some appreciated it while others didn’t. I once bought Spices for a friend and till today I have not heard a ‘Thank you’ from her. Her response was ‘see the small thing you got’. I pointed out to her that I was like 0.5kg away from the limit and her response was ‘you still had some space na’. I really, really, reallyyyyyyy had to hold my tongue then.

      Bottom line is I do not, I repeat DO NOT carry things for anyone besides members of my immediate family. Even then I’m, careful about it. Got stuff for my sister last Christmas which led to me having to pay for excess luggage. I’m about to email her the cost for the items and the excess luggage.

      No man is an island, but when people start to take your generosity for granted, you have to learn to say ‘no’. That does not make you a bad or selfish person. If they cannot deal with it, tough.

      • Beegal January 14, 2013 at 2:57 PM

        Haha! I had a lot of luggage on a trip to London and gave my friend coming to Naija a few weeks later some to carry for me cos I didn’t want to pay for extra luggage. Another friend I had stayed with asked me to carry some thyme, curry and spices to Naija for her despite the fact she knew I had excess already. I put it in my own luggage not the one I sent to my friend cos I felt like I had stayed with her so let me be nice. This was two years ago and no one came to carry the spice till today :) Is there something like I must send sth to Naija syndrome! Lol

    • nems January 14, 2013 at 10:33 AM

      I just say NO, my sister once missed her flight because of carrying load and buying stuff for people, Even if I decide to help I choose what to carry (VERY IMPORTANT THINGS) not just anything and if they give me a bag, I’ll take one or 2 items from the bag take it or leave it, family members included.
      I don’t want stress or end up swearing for them later!
      http://www.anemistyle.blogspot.com

    • xoxo January 14, 2013 at 10:37 AM

      I tire for our Naija people o. As a rule, I don’t transport stuff for people. I helped my siblings buy stuff only once and vowed never to allow anyone give me long list of any thing again. The amount of energy I spent walking all over the malls looking for discount and even money spent on air time….You would think I was shopping for my own wedding.

      I gave someone a list once too but after this my own experience, I really felt bad cos we were not even that close. My new rule is to not collect or give lists, that way no one owes any one anything. If I can afford to get you more than chocolates, fine. If not no wahala. You did not contribute a dime to my airfare.

      Another annoying thing is when you return fdrom holidays and you colleagues start asking why you did not bring anything back for sales….Hello! It was my holiday, my money and you should still know the way to the fashion store rather than wait for me to bring stuff that you will buy and pay me back over 10 years.

      • Mz Socially Awkward... January 14, 2013 at 3:52 PM

        Or the friends who ask you why you visited Nigeria without bringing things to sell. Like I’m going to spend my own money buying things to sell with no assurance of actually recouping my hard earned cash.

        • Nice Anon January 14, 2013 at 5:04 PM

          This one is the worst!

    • Ushees January 14, 2013 at 10:44 AM

      lmao!!! dis is 4 mii,i actually told a frnd comin back frm d UK 2 get mii 3tins of whipped cream,i must admit i was inconsiderate cos she called mii 2 tell mii she was bringin stuffs 2 sell back in Nigeria, but all i wntd was my whipped cream…2 cut d long story short she didnt bring dem,cos she even had 2 leave some of her goods behind “sobs” nd i was angry wif her but not anymore sha afta a long thot…

    • pynk January 14, 2013 at 10:47 AM

      i dont carry stuff for anybody for free. If you aint my immediate family, i add on a premium so it can cover the cost of carrying your mess.

    • CeeCee January 14, 2013 at 10:55 AM

      I do NOT like to carry stuff for people but ,as you have rightly pointed out, no man is an island. If I have to carry ANYTHING for ANYBODY, I will open it and check what is in it. My friend once asked me to carry a pack (6 tablets) of Tetmosol soap to the UK for her brother. No problem, I opened every pack to be sure it was just soap. I cant shout abeg. I usually do the same for anything I have to carry, be it clothes or even medicine-yes, Aunty G, I opened the bottle of cough syrup to be sure it was cough syrup. As if one cannot buy cough syrup abroad.
      People should also ensure that they are ready to come to my house/office to pick up their items (or send someone). I cannot carry a package to Lagos and journey to Iju to deliver it when I live in Ajah. Those are my 2 conditions and i feel they are quite reasonable :)

    • Yinka January 14, 2013 at 11:20 AM

      NAWA OH, SO RICH PEOPLE ARE THE ONE VISITING THIS BELLA NAIJA, CHOI. I NEVER EVEN LEAVE LAGOS TALK-LESS OF ABUJA, NOW GOING TO LONDON LOUN, LOUN! I HAIL OH, I DEY ENJOY UNA GIST SHA, KEEP THE CAMERA ROLLING.

      • Cindylee January 14, 2013 at 12:15 PM

        Lol Yinka. One day, you go visit and it will be well earned. I used to be like you before until I started working and was able to save to travel. first was Ghana on holidays, then London. Now I am thinking of visiting the US this year. Its no big deal as when you come back, you will still be your normal self. Life is in stages, when you get to that stage, live it well.

      • Nonnie January 14, 2013 at 12:46 PM

        hahahahaha, yinka why you dey vex?? just tap into their blessings jare rather than shout by writing in caps. A lot of us havent left the shores of naija, it dont mean we should hate on those who have. Cheers!! I love Atoke tho… He/she is one reason I visit BN.

        • notaplayerhater January 14, 2013 at 1:51 PM

          but she no vex na.she’s just airing her views..lol

      • Cynthia January 14, 2013 at 6:54 PM

        Lol@ yinka, I love your spirit dearie, na people like u,God they bless cos of ur open heart, and not being envious, if na some people na, dem for say people come show say dem dey travel for here.

    • ij January 14, 2013 at 11:49 AM

      i make myself very unavailable when i want to travel, there are some people that can’t hear that you are traveling and wish u safe journey just like that , there must be an errand and its never money or a letter that you can put in your handbag, its usually something that has to be wrapped one trillion times

    • Naijamum in L. January 14, 2013 at 12:14 PM

      This got me smiling
      I can confirm I have upset a few people who always want to load me with junk LOL
      My two rules:
      - Never tell people – except really close few – you are travelling
      - Ask for money from those with ‘outlandish’ requests …..for example, I once got someone asking me to get ‘just’ two tubs of Creme De La Mer Moisturizing cream from London. Considering each tub costs approx £200……….I told her that is not the kind of errand I can even consider :(

      • Mz Socially Awkward... January 14, 2013 at 3:56 PM

        Creme de la mer?? Just 2 tubs, ke??? On the basis of what friendship when payment for said purchase hasn’t been made in advance????

        • R January 14, 2013 at 9:06 PM

          creme de la kini ????? *tears*

    • Lani January 14, 2013 at 12:42 PM

      Oh i love this.
      Once, I went to pay a friend a long overdue visit in another city. Since I about visiting Nigeria, she begged me to take somethings to her friend. No biggie, 9kg. It was a lot but i thought no wahala. Just as I was about leaving her house, she had the guts to announce to her family ‘Lani is going to Nigeria, does anyone have anything they want to send?’ I was shocked. I was so stunned. I just stood looking. Give people an inch they take a mile. 2kg becomes 12kg. Ever since then, Lani doesn’t have space in her luggage. In fact no one usually knows when Lani is travelling.

    • Titojgirl January 14, 2013 at 1:31 PM

      A friend heard I was traveling and wrote a list of 20 items (shoes £6 (black , blue) bags (red , nlack n white at £10 each) and tops) sent it thru bbm paid a ridiculous amount to my account using £1 to N250! With a note to ensure I buy accordingly o if I have issues with size I should ping her!!! Almost ran mad to now top it up, on my return trip an aunt of a friend gave me bag of stuff to give her kids. Little did I know that I am expected to go and deliver the bag to her child in unilateral until I called n the small rat was asking wen am bringing the bag n why it’s taking me too long!

      The bag is still in my box after 3months of return, when they need it I have told her they have my no n work addresss.

      • Mz Socially Awkward... January 14, 2013 at 4:06 PM

        Oh, I can so relate to receiving outlandish requests to shop for people who send you inconsiderable sums… a friend once sent me on such an errand – £100 to buy like 100 items. We’re talking different colors of dresses with matching shoes, accessories etc and she expected me to hit all the sales joints in town, in order for her to get her money’s worth. Imagine the stress of shopping for good deals for yourself and then imagine the stress of trying to shop for good deals for someone else while making sure they don’t cry “foul” and accuse you of squandering their money. I decided after that experience that I’m NEVER shopping for anyone ever again. The very most I can do is give you account details to pay the money into and then you send me the online link to your item and I just click on it & pay. And you better have made your own arrangements for delivery to Naija…

    • Nice Anon January 14, 2013 at 1:57 PM

      You know the one that kills me totally? When random strangers on Twitter ask if anyone is coming home so that you can courier stuff for em. It grinds my teeth and I think that’s highly inappropriate.

      • Doll January 14, 2013 at 2:17 PM

        LOL!!! Yeah, I’ve seen that on BBM… ‘Anyone going to Naija holla’

        Yeah, like I’m going to ‘holla’ so you can give me loads of junk to carry abi??? **rollseyes** I jejely ignored it.

    • Zayt January 14, 2013 at 2:15 PM

      hahahaha been cracking up.
      i’ve had terrible experiences that i no longer tell pple when am travelling or when am returning back. the last time i travelled, had to tell a colleague of mine coz she was aware of the whole visa process and the numerous excuses from work! to cut the long story short, i came back with a full box of 21kg for her. my saving grace was that my bro was comin back with me for xmas and had jst 1 bag. You wont believe when i got to the office and she calculated her stuff the first question she asked was ‘how much did u get for VAT for all my things’? i was shocked!!!! the look i gave her she didnt ask for her VAT money again. wat rubbish?? after suffering in the cold! some pple jst dont have shame!!! hiss. infact am vexing now just thinking back!

      • Italian Princess January 15, 2013 at 9:21 AM

        Lollllll VAT kor! TAV nii! LOL

    • hauwa January 14, 2013 at 2:17 PM

      i dodged a friend who was trying to get me to take a message for her wn i travelled. unfortunately, she found out afta i left n called . made me feel all guilty so i agreed to bring a parcel back. the parcel involved a long trip to lincolnshire. then i got a long fridge bag filled with everything from mop to buckets. i paid 120 pounds for extra baggage ( which she promised to refund n did not). and worst, my name was announced at heathrow aloud. i panicked… ”abi, hard drugs dey d luggage ??? ”thank God it was for a check -in error… PROMISE TO MY PRECIOUS SELF — Helping has limits!!!

      • Sonia January 18, 2013 at 12:50 AM

        I’m crying here with laughter @ that announcement and hard drugs!!! LOLLLLLL

    • Retrochic January 14, 2013 at 2:37 PM

      Hahaha, Lesson No 1: if its not immediate family, never help, because friends can be very unappreciative, One time my friend in owerri gave me a document to bring to Lagos since i was coming in to Town, i agreed, when it was time for her Elder sister to receive it, i had to convey the parcel from surulere to Allen Avenue, and then i was still in university, i had to jump buses to finally get to thier place, and guess what the sister took it from me, and she said My dear thankyou, you are so nice, dont worry i will send credit to you, imagine an older lady, and of course she never sent any credit to me, since then i learnt my lesson. a lot of people take others for granted, it was very hurtful. and another rule the less friends you have the better for you, all you need most times is just God and family, and a few friends wey thier head correct.

    • Debo January 14, 2013 at 2:56 PM

      Loools. Asides family members (immediate family members) I no dey help pesin carry load. That said, if I do agree to carry your load, it is under the condition that if I weigh it and it passes my allowance I am posting it back (fortunately I always have someone go to the airport with me). I remember one of my older aunties asking me to carry things for her. Didn’t say no but na her son drop me for airport. As we reach and I weighed and it was over I went “uncle see o, please tell mummy it was overweight”, removed the luggage and handed it over to him. The last time she asked for such favour again, I collected it and dropped it at another aunty’s house. Her son went to pick it up from there. Except I have a near empty box or I had already planned to pay for one overweight box, better not ask me to carry load for you. Cause na no you go receive. If I no fit tell you no, I go collect am, drop am somewhere else and call you to tell you I couldn’t carry your load.

    • Deji January 14, 2013 at 3:06 PM

      Well my experience is quite the opposite. My brother once sent something through his friend to me. So being the considerate person that i am i called her and tried to find out how we could meet (my intension was to go to her place to pick it up so she won’t be inconvenienced). Well, she said she would be travelling a lot and would visit my city, so i waited and on the day she was to arrive i went to the train station to wait for her (spent 5 hours waiting), meanwhile i tried to call and she wasn’t picking, only to be told the next day that she missed her train/her train was cancelled. I was a bit angry but i just felt she’s doing us a favour so let me try and reach her, that’s how the lady kept posting me until the day she was to travel out. At that point i just couldn’t handle it anymore, so i told her off. It’s better not to carry anything that to carry it grudgingly.

    • Mary January 14, 2013 at 3:18 PM

      I love this article. I had a huge fight with my friend of about 20 years over this. This particular weekend I stayed over in her house and then discovered in the morning that I needed to have dental surgery, so the stay extended into the weekdays. At the same time I had a business trip to make to the UK the next week. once she heard I was travelling she went into overdrive, called her sister in the UK telling her the sizes of clothes she wanted and trying to get the address of the place I would stay from me (so they could send her ‘load’ there ostensibly). I had already told her I wasnt going to carry anything so she tried to get her husband to talk to me but he was not interested. The next day, as I recovered from my surgery and she went to work, an elderly lady appeared with not 1, not 2, but 4 Ghana must go bags of stuff. She pretended that she had missed my friend then began telling me how important it was that her daughter in London got those bags which she said contained weave-on and other things she was selling. Then she looked at me as though in surprise and said ‘ are you going to London’? You can help me carry some now. To cut a long story short, I carried myself and my swollen jaw and left the house for mine.

    • Jess January 14, 2013 at 3:30 PM

      If its not my Mother of Father asking me to bring stuff. Ain’t nobody got time for that. The rest of my “family” know that and no one has asked me to bring them or help them carry anything for years now. I don’t ask anybody to help me carry anything, Biko there is a postal system in place for a reason. If you’re desperate you shall make use of it!

    • ivy January 14, 2013 at 3:42 PM

      lol my friend wanted me to take stuff for her to nigeria well her husband had to bring d stuff to my house and also he drove me to the airport, made aure i was able to check in, waited for me to board before leaving. when i got to nigeria her cousin came to my house to pick it up! simples. Thank God i haven’t had any horror stories.

    • rola January 14, 2013 at 3:46 PM

      @Doll I agree with you’ no man is an island ‘ but after having the WORST summer holiday 2 years, I have learnt to define my limits as regards travelling with other peoples stuff.
      On leaving naija I had nothing to carry, my aunt in law gave me a full bag to transit to her daughter in London , who will then take it to Germany .Meanwhile I was going to Scotland(my cousins place) first be4 heading to London. Suffer head part one
      Leaving Wales I had shopped a luggage full for myself & hubby, having found it easier to shop outside London. Now I have two bags to drag across coach ride. Suffer head part 2
      On getting to Victoria, I had to call for her daughter to come help with it, before she came the handle of the bag gave way before I got to the bus station. Suffer head part 3
      On getting home (my inlaws place) I met a senior aunt in-law who was around with her whole family of 4. On the day of their departure the guy who took them to the airport returned with excess stuff from their bags. Imagine what allowance they had a family of 4.
      My dearest aunt in law wanted me to bring the excess back to naija and really I was in a fix. So I packed it up with my luggage and left for the airport in a cab. I arrived late to the airport and had excess luggage (1st time ever), I shuffled till I had 2 hand luggage. While still thinking of what to do on the security line, I got talking to the elderly man behind me who offered to carry 1 luggage for me but we were flying different airlines to Lagos. I was so grateful, in a bid to exchange contacts; the airline announced my name as the last passenger to board and came with a carriage to drive me to departure, was confused to say the least and left the luggage behind with no exchange of contacts. I couldn’t believe myself on board, in the luggage left behind were most of my personal belongings (some pricy pieces in there) on getting home I was weak and busted into tears, I cried for days and my hubby couldn’t just believe that his aunt gave me all those stuff and used her family’s allowance to bring back SILLY items from a clearance sale to give out to people. It took love & forgiveness to heal me, having found out what I lost compared to the silly items my aunt in-law brought back.
      Lessons I learnt
      1. I only tell whom I deem fit should know when travelling
      2. If I need to use my baggage allowance on a trip (sometimes usually wont) , every other person I shop for pays ( cost /no of shoppers),so I buy excess baggage allowance for their stuff. Except it is light and NOT using up my allowance.
      3. Whenever I ask people to pick or buy stuff for me, I make a list short £20 of the amount I gave. Transportation o di kua expensive abroad, inconvenience nko, water &chops for the shopping trip
      4. If u send me errand and u are a STINGO / AKAGUM I will take out what I need from you money if need be, give u your receipt and explain myself. Shikena

      • Abana January 14, 2013 at 6:49 PM

        Oh dear! I want to cry for you. I can’t even begin to imagine how you felt. Na to shoot somebody in annoyance be dat. Pele.

    • rola January 14, 2013 at 3:48 PM

      *leaving scotland*

    • ClaireN January 14, 2013 at 3:48 PM

      LOL, all these stories have me laughing. I have a few experiences. Anyone who tells me to buy them anything under “I will pay you when you get back” always gets a big fat NO. No stories. One time, a cousin asked me to buy him a premiership jersey. Imagine an easy N15k that i can use to do small damage in Primark. My answer was NO! Send the money through my GTB account or forget about it. Another time, my amebo cousin who lives with me found out i was travelling that night and went to tell a neighbor who i’d never seen in my life and he had the guts to come into my flat to ask me to bring something back from London. My response was “You know i’m a girl and i will have load, so NO”, he kept on insisting. I got to London and this man (he got my number from my cousin) called me EVERYDAY. I eventually stopped taking his calls. A friend has even asked me to bring her back 6 fluffy towels from the UK . No comment at all! *sigh*

    • Mo'beautiful January 14, 2013 at 4:04 PM

      I once helped a friend bring stuff from Nigeria. Before i left for Nigeria he told me just a few things so as per friend now i said no problem. Upon getting to Nigeria and receiving the “few things” from his mum it turned out that the “few things” were not so few! They included cray fish, bitter leaf, pepper soup spice, garri, Egusi and something i can’t even remember now! and not in small quantities oh! The clothes inside nko and the shoes? *lips sealed*

      We agreed the few things would be put at least inside Ghana must go or something. Come and see the bag mama used to pack the things! it was made from very thin cloth. So i called my friend and told him the situation. When i got to lagos i jejely removed all the bitter leaf, cray fish and co and sent them back to mama. I left a little of the egusi and pepper soup spice sha with the clothes and shoes. I don try lol. Finally i had to buy a proper box to put the things in at the end of the day and his stuff weighed about 18kg. Qatar allowed only 23kg so i called him and told him to sharply arrange how i will get the money for excess luggage and i told him that if he was not at the airport waiting for me when i arrived ehn he would not like me!!.

      When i got back he was waiting at the airport lol the guy fear! I gave him the money left from what i received for excess. The part that now annoyed me was when he said the money i gave him should be more because the weight of the box i bought added to the overall weight. I now told him it was not his fault. I should have used the bag his mum used initially so that all his things could have been stolen and that he should berra fogerrit cuz $1 more sef won’t leave my wallet. He then said i should leave the box with him. I didn’t even say anything. I just dumped his stuff with him and wheel my box out of his house.

      Since then, this is my rule. Me i can still help o! 1) It must not be more than 1kg 2) you must pay for excess and meet me at the airport! Shikena!!

    • Agbaya January 14, 2013 at 4:42 PM

      I love this topic., I agree with the person that said you dont have to tell anyone the exact date you are travelling, Too many inconsiderate people around.
      Im relocating to Naija in few weeks, Everyone has been asking, When r u going? i just tell them i havent bought my ticket bcos really they dont care,they some of them are just looking for how to send thier used clothes..etc to extended family members…They would be hearing the gist that ive left.
      I would never forget my experience 7yrs ago, my dad,siblings n I missed our flight, we had no money to get on the next flight, we almost slept at the airport that night, thank God for a good samaritan who accomodated us at his house for the night..Simply because we had excess luggage, almost 20kg of those things were for people and they never even bother to follow u to the airport,just incase the stuffs are too many for you to carry. I even lost count of how many of my belongings i had to throw away at the point of check in,while we were trying to catch up with the flight, U know how strict Virgin Atlantic can be with baggage allowance. After all the stress, we ended up missing the flight, But God just favoured us bcos we didnt pay a dime and got on the flight the next day evening.
      Funny enough, ive never given someone anything to take home for me, I know what its like. After that experience, i say a blatant NO to anything that looks heavy, Even if u want to pay for ur extra baggage, I dont care, Im not carrying for u.
      Many of these people travel without telling anyone, so they never help others yet they want people to help them. Its me n my immediate family now o, I dont send. I even stopped buying things for people because Nigerians never appreciate things, U spend ur hard earned money(working in d cold n things) only for u to get back home n people start looking at whatever u give them as if thats the worst u can do.
      This time, Im going to enjoy my baggage allowance, Flex and buy all the things i need for me myself n I…lol..
      Experience teaches u the hardway.

    • Mz Socially Awkward... January 14, 2013 at 4:55 PM

      Atoke, you’re speaking to my situation as I just returned from a holiday visit to Naija.

      Turned down a lot of requests to carry things back as I had more than enough of my own to carry. I won’t even begrudge anyone who did the same to me because I completely understand – visiting Naija usually involves a lot of heavy-duty shopping for the returnee, with so many people to buy gifts for. And if you throw in the many weddings to attend, parties to go to, Koko concerts and etc which usually take place around christmas time, any babe who’s making that journey is going to need enough outfits to remain on top of her game because heaven forbid if you get photographed at some groove looking ratchet and the pictures make their way unto BellaNaija.com… I’m just saying it as it is.

      So I don’t expect people to carry things for me to return to Naija even though I do expect a couple of bottles of groundnut when they return. Just because nothing compares to Lagos epa, mehn… :-)

    • Dee Baba January 14, 2013 at 5:13 PM

      I don’t have a problem with carrying stuff for people. I just tell them to weigh whatever they are bringing over and ask them to hold $10 per kilo for excess luggage. Guess what, nobody shows up.

    • MP January 14, 2013 at 6:18 PM

      This lady in my former church heard that I was going home so she asked me to help her take a small box. I kept asking “how big is the box?” and she kept demonstrating the size of a regular hand luggage, so I said no problem. When she finally brought the box to my my place it was bigger than my own luggage and it was overweight! Kia Kia I said no way! I was so confused how did “one small bag” become a box and a half? I guess I should have suspected when she said “small box”

    • CEO January 14, 2013 at 7:58 PM

      I can’t believe Atoke wrote about this. you completely read my mind. i have FOUGHT countless times with family members over this issue. traveling is always war time because I have perpetual senders in my extended family. There are people that even if you travel to Nigeria 100 times a year, for each visit they will always have something to send.

      I don’t send anybody o. I just tell people HELL NO! if its not as light as a feather and doesnt cost $5,better dont ask me. the worst are people who will ask you to get stuff with your own money. designer purses o…and im like have u seen the purse im carrying. u want me to buy designer purses for u with my money so u will “reimburse”. thunder fire ur bum bum.

      this whole thing vexes me!

    • Yinka January 14, 2013 at 8:18 PM

      @Aunt Nonnie ABA, I NO DEY VEX OH AND BEFORE YOU SAY ‘SEF’ I’VE STARTED TAPPING MY BLESSING, IN FACT OVER TAPPED LOLZ.
      @ Aunty Cindylee THANKS FOR YOUR KIND AND ENCOURAGING WORDS.

    • Adedoyin January 14, 2013 at 8:40 PM

      This happened to me in last year August. I was going to Canada for the first time.Meanwhile i have a friend who has lived in Canada almost all her life and her family members are in Lagos. Only for her to beg me and say i should help her collect something from her mother inlaw. Miss Nice of me, i went to her mother inlaw’s place ( With ma own money o) , i got there. Lo and behold, if u see what this my friend called small bag ehen…I wan faint. I opened the Ghana must go to find stuffs like Elubo(Yam flour), Egusi, Tinko(Roasted meat), Peppersoup ingredient, meat, snail, toothbrush,and all sort of this. I politely told the mother in law that i cant carry all the stuffs and that she should reduce it. Meanwhile, my parents wasnt in support of it. I had just 46kg luggage to pack for myself and another person’s bag is already weighing 17kg. To cut the story short, getting to the airport, i realised that the box weighted more than the expected Kg. I had to remove alot of my own stuff in order to accomodate hers. At a time, i had no other choice than to remove her stuff as well. Only for me to call her and tell her the situation of things, by this time i was about boarding. I was shocked when this my so-called friend said to me” Babe , you should not have remove my grinded pepper and Egusi now, those things are really expensive in Canada”. I didnt know when i bursted into tears.
      Lesson learnt- I will never act Miss Nice when it comes to helping people with their load. I was my first experience and a bad one at that. Needless i say that most of the things i brought of her, i didnt have.I had to pay alot of money to get them in Canada . Apart from my immediate family members, no more Miss nice when it comes to acting as a carrier.

    • Ebee January 14, 2013 at 9:48 PM

      PLease tell them ,my frnd asked me to carry an entire box 30kg fa saying he will pay excess luggage. hw does he expect me to haul 3 boxes and a hand luggage to Heathrow

      • Monica January 15, 2013 at 2:43 PM

        if they give you an extra box the better be taking you to the airport as well or atleast giving you money for a taxi. thats my policy

    • stellamwindsor January 15, 2013 at 12:39 AM

      Don’t tell people when your travelling till you’re at the airport or better still your destination.(*straight face*) if ur not my immediate family forget it. FEDEX AND DHL are there for a reason.

    • Adedoyin January 15, 2013 at 2:26 AM

      *Pardon my typo error*

    • Berry Dakara January 15, 2013 at 2:40 PM

      LOL! Love all the responses! I wish I could stop telling people when I’m traveling. But I have a perfect excuse: “My mum sells stuff and I’m sure she’s going to give me 2-3 bags to carry. Sawry.” And that’s it. I don’t budge.

      The worst experience I ever had was a few years ago, someone asked me to bring some money from his family. I usually wouldn’t, but I agreed cos he said it was a do-or-die situation. Stupid me, I put the envelope in my suitcase, not hand luggage. Needless to say, my locks were broken and the envelope taken! I called the guy in tears, telling him what happened and that I would find a way to get the amount he’d told me I was to bring. I frantically called around trying to get the amount, which thankfully, I did. How about this human being reverts and tells me the money wasn’t complete and I owed him an extra 2000USD!!! Excuse me? I’m not stupid. Since when is 3000GBP = 7000USD??????????? In what century????? And afterwards, the bastard and his family went around telling people that I was thief.

      GOD FORBID I CARRY ANYTHING FOR ANYBODY AGAIN!!!!!!!

      http://berrydakara.blogspot.com

    • anonymous January 15, 2013 at 8:59 PM

      lol @ the tales of woe. well, as a rule i try not to carry stuff for people but i made an exception last year because i was trying to be nice wen a family friend asked me to take some few things to naija 4 her. Me, olodo, i now said no problem thinking it would just be eish i would be able to pack inside my suitcase only for her to show up with a suitcase! In my mind,i was wondering whether the chic no know say me sef na babe, abi na 1 plastic bag i de carry go naija? Ppl and their wahala sha!!!

    • Gimmer January 16, 2013 at 8:15 AM

      I get asked all the time if I can arr load …and I always sy it In the most polite American accent ” the law prohibits be from assisting strangers with their luggage, if you ak me again, I will have to call security ” lets just say I’ve never had to rep myself to anyone. Convo just ends there

      • Sonia January 18, 2013 at 1:12 AM

        I don’t think you read the article, Americana.

    • Oremeyi February 21, 2013 at 8:36 PM

      Me wey pride wan kill my grey hair. It doesn’t permit to ask anybody to help me carry anything and i don’t carry for people. I have never traveled out. But my brother is in UK. if i have to send anything. It is NIPOST all the way. No stories. No waiting, no insults. he gets it at his door step. if i need anything i send him postage fee.

    • LateNtry June 24, 2013 at 1:56 AM

      Thanx jare… I think I’ll just be copying and pasting this link for pple that ask me such favors from now. Thing is, I can’t even vex 4 pple dt haven’t travelled b4 becos they myt not know how inconvenient it is. But if u look at it well, it’s the ones that have experienced the western life that do this unspeakable thing. Anyway, like most comments have said, say NO to such inconveniences. There’s really no point making someone happy by making urself unhappy

    • Gbola July 29, 2013 at 2:42 PM

      a friend once asked me to buy car seat for her baby. I simply told her i had no space. i no dey shame that kain thing.