The Other Side of Valentine

This year, I dedicate my valentine’s piece not to the market segment that February 14th has become branded and commercialized for, but to the lovers it ignores.

To the lovers who got stuck on the way and unable to figure it out, gave up and parted ways.

To the hearts stuck in reverse praying a lost love back home.

To the newcomer who has found himself in a virgin place of vulnerability.

To the fearful, afraid to take the plunge.

To the unprepared shocked that so hard a thing as love would be demanded of them.

To the one who has been there and done that, and has now taken form in a cold heart banging the door firmly and finally on love.

No I do not ignore the lover who is folded in a nurturing embrace where she has found her heart’s resting place, for I completely understand her. I know her joy, I muse at her abandon, I understand her smile and I recognize her rich laughter, no I don’t ignore her, not at all! Yes, I see her and the world sees her.

But what about the one who hides what lies beneath, what must not be known, what must not be seen? The one who scolds her desire like it’s a bastard child, turning her face adamantly away from it as though she was raped by love and now she hates its child- this bundle of weakening emotions that remind her of hungry thrusts that took and took and took.

I am writing for the disappointed who thought that love will be the missing link that makes life complete.

I am writing for the true lover who came to love on a level ground and gave it 100% but found something else. Although it was called love, it manifested itself as selfish and one- sided.

I am writing for the soul like a bruised reed bent in the wind, praying her broken heart won’t break. No I do not ignore the lover who is secure in a love that understands, that accommodates, and does her no wrong.

But what about the one who found herself ravaged like a house without gates. The one attacked by enemy forces banging against her walls of defense. With one last heave they reach her deepest, and all she hears is the eerie harmony of voices; his pitch with stolen pleasure, hers only cry, tears a last defense.

This season, I write acknowledging the women on both sides of the valentine dream. For the woman experiencing the phantom and the woman experiencing the fantasy of valentine. For the woman ensconced and the woman scorned. For the woman fallen in love and the woman fallen out of love.

At the end of the day, it is not about how we have been loved but about how we have loved – wrongly or rightly; poorly or richly; sparingly or generously.

For all the lovers out there, do have a Happy Valentine’s day!

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Omonike Odi is a freelance writer and a media content provider on all media platforms. Read more from her on her blog at http://omonaikee.blogspot.com or follow her on twitter for daily inspirational quotes at https://twitter.com/omonaikee or contact her –[email protected].