Amber Rose writes for Time Magazine on “How I Learned to Stop Caring What People Think”

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Following Kanye West’s tweets where he called ex-girlfriend Amber Rose a stripper, the model and mum of one has written an op-ed piece for Time Magazine talking about how she learned to stop caring what people think of her.

Read her article below.

Ever since high school, I’ve been called a slut. All the boys were attracted to me—that wasn’t my fault! Then, when I started getting famous, the shaming got even worse. All these messed up stories came out about me, and I was like, “That’s not true! I’m not that kind of girl!” But even things I had done—things a man would never be judged for—got me lots of hate.

After my ex-husband Wiz Khalifa and I got a divorce, I’d go out for a date at a restaurant like any normal single human and people would say, “Man, she’s such a ho. She’s out at restaurants with guys.” Then they would see my ex-husband with a bunch of women. They would say, “He’s the man! That’s so cool.” So when I went on a date, I’m a whore, and when he’s piling girls in a car, he’s the man? There’s something wrong here.

It wasn’t just men saying these types of things. There were a lot of women saying hateful things to me. I was getting torn down constantly. But in the past year, I’ve just started not caring.

People would actually say things like, “Who would ever love you? You were a stripper. Why are you in relationships?” And I used to feel like I had to explain that maybe it was because I’m a good person.

But I realized that I can’t make everyone believe. And I can’t talk to everyone and tell them who I really am. They’re still going to have their own opinions. If you know me, you love me. If you don’t know me, you might love me, but you might not—and that’s cool. And you know what? Now I sleep like a baby at night.

It wasn’t even that hard to stop caring what other people thought. I wasn’t married, and I didn’t have a boyfriend so I didn’t have to care about anyone else’s feelings or protect anyone’s heart. I thought, “This is my life. This is about me. If you don’t like it, I don’t care. I’m going to do anything and everything I want with my own life.”

What I’ve realized is that, when you care too much, you’re not living at your full potential. When you really stop caring about what people say, that’s when you really start living. It’s such an amazing feeling. It’s about loving who you are, owning who you are and knowing that it’s O.K. to live your life how you want to live it. We’re all human, which means we’re not all perfect. It’s so cool to think that I might help women think about who they want to be and then encourage them to be that person with no remorse. I want to help women just be happy in their own skin.

So please: Before you judge someone—especially another woman—put yourself in her shoes and also look at your past. That’s what a lot of women fail to do. They’re so quick to call another girl names, but it’s like: You know what? There may have been a time where you looked back and said, “I probably shouldn’t have done that.” Does that make you a ho? No, it makes you a human.

22 Comments on Amber Rose writes for Time Magazine on “How I Learned to Stop Caring What People Think”
  • YayFirstComment?? January 29, 2016 at 4:35 pm

    I loved life before facebook, Tweeter and social media in general. When friendship with real people and physical activities were in vogue.

    Today you have a fight with your spouse and your first instinct will be to go on social media to spew. Seriously? Like people really give a rip.

    Unfortunately I don’t see social media going anywhere anytime soon.

    God come quick….

    • A Real Nigerian January 29, 2016 at 5:06 pm

      God come where?

    • olu January 29, 2016 at 5:52 pm

      God is here ..and he allows and endorses social media.

      Guess what? God also gave us the free will to do whatever ..so ….pls take responsibility for ur actions folks.

  • CrazyTalk January 29, 2016 at 4:47 pm

    You ain’t never lie. I was just thinking about that. Social media spoiled everything.

    • K-Group January 29, 2016 at 6:59 pm

      Social media didn’t spoil anything. People spoilt their lives.

  • Grace January 29, 2016 at 5:01 pm

    “So please: Before you judge someone—especially another woman—put yourself in her shoes and also look at your past. That’s what a lot of women fail to do. They’re so quick to call another girl names, but it’s like: You know what? There may have been a time where you looked back and said, “I probably shouldn’t have done that.” Does that make you a ho? No, it makes you a human.” SMH Alot of people so quick to judge.
    I have always loved Amber Rose though. #TeamMuva

  • chizzy January 29, 2016 at 5:39 pm

    I really do understand her feelings, it’s not good how we judge people just let God be the judge .Go on girl live ur life just live it right.

  • Susan January 29, 2016 at 5:54 pm

    But Amber was soo quick to call Kim a whore in her personal Twitter feud with Khloe.That makes it hard for me to take whatever she says about slut shaming seriously when she also does the same thing!

    • Smh January 29, 2016 at 7:24 pm

      Because Khloe came at her and her lifestyle when she was only trying to give some advice to Kylie

      • Susan January 29, 2016 at 8:34 pm

        I get that completely. But that was Khloe. So why not diss Khloe? Why bring Kim into the whole mess? For someone so strongly against slut shaming I just think it was extremely hypocritical. of her. And I also think we all know that was no friendly advice she was giving Kylie. It was a whole lotta shade!

  • lyl January 29, 2016 at 6:08 pm

    True talk. To each his/ her own. For real *nobody holy pass*.

  • K-Group January 29, 2016 at 7:00 pm

    We all judge people to an extent; how else do you determine who you make your friends and who you stay away from?
    Ceteris Paribus, Life is up to you.

  • dumebi marie January 29, 2016 at 7:48 pm

    She sounds so hurt… why?

  • chi-e-z January 29, 2016 at 9:04 pm

    This a very selfish and egotistical generation.

  • Hawt Talk With Tosan January 29, 2016 at 9:45 pm

    So glad I stopped caring what people think or say about me years ago. It comes with age. If you still do please free yourself because it is a form of imprisonment.

  • ‘Deola January 29, 2016 at 11:06 pm

    … she poses as a rabbit head with perched ears. And yet, she complains about people calling her a ho. She just donned a ho regalia. This is all confusing for the mind. Her restrained voice in the article versus the imagery of the implied sexuality of a rabbit. I can imagine Kanye pictured as a ram with horns, but would he allow that? Most probably not.

    • Idomagirl January 30, 2016 at 3:01 am

      Shebi you know this picture is old and wasn’t taken for the article?

    • Anita January 30, 2016 at 8:46 am

      Please wats ur business is it not Her body exactly what she is saying u don’t judge a book by its cover,because of piercing n all u call her a Ho SMH

  • byie January 30, 2016 at 6:57 am

    Thnk God people edit n review all those writings before publishing them. Muva abi wetin ur name be again… u ve been in the news too much n for absolute nonsense. We ve had these ur story like forever. Change topic abegy.

  • mabel January 30, 2016 at 10:55 am

    They’ve been calling you a ho since high school? Na wa o. High school is it not secondary school? What did you do na? Till now? You now dressed like ho and do ho walk abi protest. Yet you don’t care. Inagwa biati.

  • Keti March 6, 2016 at 1:51 am

    Hi my lovely Amber ) I like u l love u too beacouse u are so good one Persone and beautiful not just outside , but in site too…I love all in you Becouse u geve me ( I will talk just about me ) but I’m sure that many people like u too) so much power and allot of others thinks to …
    For exsempel ur styel ur look ur personality …
    I just want to say ,STAY PLEASE ,STRONG TROSTFULL IN UR SELF .
    AND NEVER FORGET WHO ARE YOU .
    YOU ARE THE BEST ONE IN THES WORLD
    WE WILL NEVER BE ENOGH GOOD FOR ALL….
    But that will not stop you be a good and BEAUTIFUL PERSON.
    Sorry for my broken English 😉
    I know exsactly what do you feel……
    I wisch you all the best Amber and thank you for all what you Dan for us 😉
    Keep smael Anber )
    You are AMBER ROSSE.
    Respect
    Keti….

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