While I have been called a misogynist, rape culture and violence promoter and future terrible husband, among many other names, for sharing some controversial speculative pieces, I have refused to repent of my troublesome ways. So if you are having a sensitive day, you can always stop here.
It is no secret that the average Nigerian girl is full of complaints about our men. Heck, I’m a man and I am full of complaints about my gender (even if I haven’t written on Bella about them). Infidelity and deception probably stand as the strongest of our shortcomings, with physical and emotional abuse being the most extreme. But writing about such blatant problems barely make for an interesting read, so I would like to use this medium to inquire about an issue that has become a constant subject of discontentment with a lot of my female friends.
Nigerian men are not intelligent!
And before the linguistic Generals come and accuse me of over-generalizing, biko calm down, I have learned my lesson. Not all Nigerian men are unintelligent, but word on the street is that the average Nigerian man is almost incapable of holding an intelligent conversation about anything that isn’t football.
As much as I would like to be bias to men…well…because I am one, I would have to throw in the towel here and accept defeat. But never mind identifying a problem. You don’t need to be a psychologist or detective to do that. The question is why? Nigerian men generally receive the same standard of education as our female counterpart and we are exposed to the same society. So how is it that our men are seemingly unable to hold intellectually stimulating conversation with women?
My theory is this; there is way too much emphasis placed on male financial development in this country that most men see no need to improve intellectually. As a published author (if I may so casually blow my own trumpet), I have first-hand experience with how little men read. Even publishers will tell you the female markets is what is keeping us in business (I should really write more friendly female posts). Beyond intellectual intelligence, there is emotional intelligence, which is even in lower deficit. This is evident in the sizable amount of our adult males who unable to express themselves emotionally or understand how emotions even work – to the frustration of females that seem to be almost naturally better adapted to understanding this.
The average Nigerian man believes 10 out of 10 times, she will choose comfort, so once he can provide that, he need not stress himself any further.
The result of this imbalance has spawned a growing population of working intelligent women unable to find suitable partners not because men aren’t abundant in the society, but because quantity is no substitute for quality. Women having to dumb down themselves to soothe the male ego has become commonplace in our dating culture, and at the rate we are progressing, this will only get worse. You talk to single women of “marriable” age and most will tell you that they aren’t lacking suitors by any means; but for a partnership like marriage requiring a lifelong commitment, there is only so much stupidity one can handle.
Any ladies in the house that echo these sentiments? Any brothers that thinks the situation has been misrepresented? The floor is yours.
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