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BN Hot Topic: How Many Yards of Wife Material

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Last week I was cracking my head on what topic to discuss this week and I was completely stumped. Generally I like to talk about a wide and varied scope of life issues and not only romance-related issues, so sometimes I’d like us to discuss issues that affect us all and hopefully we can find ways to benefit each other through the comments and light banter. However, love is truly a universal language and I find myself being drawn into matters of the heart and relationships in general.

Earlier on this year, during the Occupy Ojota stand off, I found that one of my friends had just moved to somewhere close to me so my cousin and I decided to go and chill there. I was very excited because it was a new place to go to faf about, play video games and drink red wine. The first thing that hit me when I stepped into the flat was the mess. There were clothes strewn everywhere, empty soda cans in the hallway and the plates in the sink were so dirty, the food remnants had caked. While I tried really hard not to judge him for being a little pig, my cousin who had the self-control of a four year old burst out on our way home; “Ahn ahn!  But Ekene has a girlfriend na! Why was that place so dirty like that. Doesn’t she go there every time?” I thought about it long and hard. It was a tricky one; one minute you’re being all “domestic” cleaning his flat, washing plates because you just can’t stand dirty places and the next minute you’re being tagged as “Playing Wifey”.   I completely forgot about that situation until last week in the office when one of the guys exclaimed “When girls say they don’t want anything SERIOUS don’t believe them oh!”. He went on to to lament about how one babe was “slowly worming her way into my house, bringing bath mat because she doesn’t want me to slip and last week it was mop and mop bucket! Abeg I don’t want”

I was shocked! How do you know she’s not just being caring? she doesn’t want you to fall and hit your knuckle head on the bath. Duh!  My friend Toun is one of the sweetest people on earth. If she meets you today, she’d be looking for ways to help you and shower you with as much love as possible whether you’re a boy or a girl.

A lot of people say women don’t know what they want but sometimes men confuse me! You don’t carry their plate to the kitchen, it means you’re not a “wife material”. You don’t make stew when you come on holiday from jand “You’re not caring”. You bring wine glasses because you’re tired of drinking out of cheap plastic cups “you’re trying to invade my space”. You’re arranging the house because honestly you can’t stand the mess, it is automatically translated to “you’re trying to make yourself too comfortable”

Honestly I’m confused. How many “yards” of wife “material” is one supposed to possess that will fit just right? On the other hand there are some women who really see it as all part of being a strategy. For some of them it pays off, but in other cases you hear sob stories of “After I washed his brother’s boxers he went and married that Jennifer”.

What do you guys think? Let’s discuss.

Photo Creditsocialsciencelite.blogspot.com

You probably wanna read a fancy bio? But first things first! Atoke published a book titled, +234 - An Awkward Guide to Being Nigerian. It's available on Amazon. ;)  Also available at Roving Heights bookstore. Okay, let's go on to the bio: With a Masters degree in Creative Writing from Swansea University, Atoke hopes to be known as more than just a retired foodie and a FitFam adherent. She can be reached for speechwriting, copywriting, letter writing, script writing, ghost writing  and book reviews by email – [email protected]. She tweets with the handle @atoke_ | Check out her Instagram page @atoke_ and visit her website atoke.com for more information.

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