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Ariyike Writes: The Strength of a Woman

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The strength and uniqueness of a woman can be compared to no other. Women have to constantly deal with a lot of issues emotionally, physically and spiritually yet we handle them with ease. I’m a mother and I can tell you that the things women deal with on a daily basis are things that require divine wisdom and strength.

From period pains to in-laws to friendship wahala to childbirth to taking care of your home/kids, to diaper changes to sleepless nights after childbirth to breastfeeding to post natal blues to early morning school runs to cooking to cleaning to shopping for the kids clothes and provisions to your partner telling you you’re nagging when you’re only trying to explain your situation. Only a woman can handle all these and more.
A woman is very diplomatic by nature. Her heart is pure, she has a sense of purpose. She understands that she is a woman and she takes advantage of it to better her family and the society in general. She is a multi-tasker by nature, she can do five different things at the same time and she’ll still be sane enough to handle her responsibility as a wife, mother, sister, daughter and career woman. She always has the answer to every question, she has the solution to every problem and if she’s at a cross roads, she’ll go on her knees and ask God for guidance. Her seemingly outward calm nature even when she has the world on her head is commendable.

You’re always willing to make sacrifices for your family even if it means resigning from a high paying job just to satisfy your family and make sure everyone is happy. You’ve been at work all day, after work you have to get to the market to buy food stuff, you’ll cook and then you still have to satisfy your man sexually and emotionally.

Sometimes, you’re too tired to talk or listen but you’ll use your last strength to talk to him and listen to him because you want to make him happy. When a child is badly behaved, the blame goes to the mother A husband could just come home one day and tell his wife of 20 years that he has a 17 year old love child with another woman and the wife holds it together, accepts the child, she stays in the marriage and continues to be nice to the man, if the case was the reverse, we all know what would have happened.

Women are sensitive and emotional. Sometimes we burst into tears and we don’t even know why we’re crying. We are said to be the weaker sex yet we are stronger than men in a whole lot of ways. Any man that has ever witnessed a woman giving birth would agree with me. We have an inner strength in feminity. A feminine woman is a strong woman. A woman that looses her husband can still strive hard, struggle and work hard to cater for her children giving them the much needed support emotionally, spiritually and financially.

My mother is a typical example of a strong woman, my father struggled with Parkinsons disease for 15 years and my mother took care of him till he passed on. All the while my father was alive and even after he passed on, I never heard her complain or lament about the situation. She also took care of all of us and sometimes even forgot to take care of herself. A woman is a surviver, she’s passionate, compasionate, subtle and level headed.

The best observers in the world are women. A woman is also the best detective because if a woman wants to detect something, trust me, she’ll succeed and if she sets her heart to achieve anything, she would definitely make it. A woman is a confidant, she knows how to keep secrets and give the best advice. Her heart is truly deeper that the ocean because she stores so much in there. Women make the best lawyers because if a woman decides to defend you, she’ll do so all the way. She’s always ready to defend her husband when she knows he’s wrong just to save his face when it comes to outsiders even if she’s going to fight him when they get back home.

A woman’s heart can connect with certain people and things on different levels. We can quickly detect things. Growing up, if your mother ever told you her spirit didn’t go too well with some of your friends or potential boyfriends, most times, those friends or potential boyfriends would always prove your mother right.

Women are very soft and should be shown all the love and care in the world. A woman’s love is unconditional, if she loves you genuinely, she would remain loving whether you treat her right or not, whether you have money or not. A woman is as delicate as an egg, once broken, you can never put the pieces together perfectly. It’s always better to handle women with care because of our fragile nature. Your woman can be the best friend you could ever have if only you give her the opportunity.

So I decided to ask a few people about the strength/uniqueness of women and here’s what they had to say, please feel free to include yours in the comment box and feel free to appreciate that special woman in the comment box, let her know you appreciate her:

Nkem (Entrepreneur): A woman is industrious, she cooks, cleans, takes care of the kids. A woman that keeps the house together is the man’s better half. She gives the man good loving to calm the man’s nerves after work. Women are subtle. They are solution providers. Women are secretive so they can be trusted.

KK (Lawyer): While you ‘re at work, they may call you from home or school that your child is not feeling well and you’ll have to rush home. My sister is a doctor in New York and she does night shift, she gets home in the morning, gets the kids ready for school and she has to see them off to the school bus, her smallest child goes to the day care, she takes her there by 10 am. When she gets back home, she’ll sleep for about 2 hours, then cook. By then it’s already time to pick up the kids from school then she’ll give them food and do their homework. When she’s done, she has a shower so she can look and smell nice then her husband comes home, she serves him his food and she still has to shag before getting ready to go and resume her night shift at work.

Yemi (Writer/Editor): Being a woman is the biggest career any human being can have. You are criticized even before attempting. Still, we stand up tall and do outstanding things and come out strong. What makes us unique is our selfless nature to everything we do which at the end of the day makes us an unbeatable team.

Segun A (CEO Canbit records):
All women are unique in their own different ways, but what makes a woman unique in a good way in my opinion are self-respect, poise, ambition, drive, attention to trying to look good, personal hygeine and good morals.

So many men out there see how hardworking their mothers, sisters, wives and daughters are but some of them have never commended these women for their hard work, dedication and sacrifices they’ve made to keep the family together. If you’re one of those men, please take out time to appreciate these women now because tomorrow may be too late. In Alicia Keys words “And a real man just can’t deny, a woman’s worth.”

Today, I salute every woman out there. We are truly beautiful and we are all champions.

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Ariyike Akinbobola is a lawyer turned TV presenter/producer at Spice TV, a fashion and lifestyle channel. She studied Law at the University of Lagos and was called to the Nigerian bar in 2006. With a diploma in T.V presenting from the London Academy of Media, film and T.V. She also organises a monthly event every first Wednesday of the month called “Best of Both Worlds” networking cocktail party. She’s married and blessed with children. Follow her on twitter@LadyAriyike to find out more.

Ariyike Akinbobola, popularly referred to as Lady Ariyike, is a foreign trained lawyer and senior immigration analyst. She is an award winning TV host, author, MC, content creator, and humanitarian. She also coaches immigrant families relocating abroad on expectations and how to navigate their new reality. 

 Ariyike is the founder of Ariland Entertainment where she showcases the African culture, fashion, lifestyle and Immigrant experiences through storytelling and film. She previously worked as a talk show host and TV producer for over 7 years abroad and gained experience in TV presenting, production, editing, writing TV treatments and scripts for TV and acting.  Ariyike has a certificate in Child Protection: Children’s Rights in Theory and Practice from Harvard X. A Diploma in TV Presenting from the prestigious London Academy of Media, Film and TV. 

She was recognized as one of the 100 most inspiring women in Nigeria in 2019. She has won several awards such as WAW Award, London. UNICEF/UNFPA Frown Award - Female Genital Mutilation Abandonment Advocate of the year, La Mode Humanitarian of the year, Mademoiselle Role Model Award, The Women’s Federation for World Peace - Ambassador for Peace Award amongst others. 

 Ariyike, through her Ariyike Arise Initiative, has helped to fund the education of Children in disadvantaged communities. Through their schools outreach, they counsel, coach and enlighten children and teenagers about the importance of Peace, Education, Empowerment and Community Development. 

She is a guest columnist on Bellanaija.com and she volunteers as a Content Creator Partner for the United Nations Refugee Agency in Canada (UNHCR). Ariyike is married with Children. Her book, The Cost of Our Lives, is available on Amazon https://www.amazon.ca/COST-OUR-LIVES-Pandemic/dp/B093R5TKCJ/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=ariyike+the+cost+of+our+lives&qid=1632077452&sr=8-1

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