Aunty Bella: Miss. Step-Father’s Illicit Proposal

Aunty Bella is our agony aunt column on BellaNaija. We launched this column in the early days of BN and periodically feature issues sent in by BN readers. We hope the BN family can offer insightful advice as well.

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This comment was left on one of our posts today.

Hi BN,

Please please please please I need your help with this via your Aunty Bella column.

Last night my father tried to have sex with me.
I am mostly still in shock.
He actually gave me a ‘sexual proposal’ saying that he’d love for us to try out an experiment and see whether he can be strong enough to resist trying anything if I sleep in the room for the night.
I immediately left the house and went to put up in a hotel for the night. I was very very shocked to say the least.

This is a man that was not drunk. He has never tried this before and even though he is my step-father he has been married to my mother for over 20 years so he is in every sense of the world my father.

Now that he has tried this with me I have to question if he has done this before. His words were too smooth. I am convinced he was under a spiritual influence because I really do not know how he could have said those things to me.

I have since sent him a message stating that I am not and will never be interested in having sexual relations with him and that we should dissolve our father-daughter relationship and simply remain cordial. He is still my mother’s husband and the father of my half-siblings.

I am truly confused.

He has been calling and texting and begging me not to tell my mother – that their marriage is fragile right now and this will just put a final nail on the coffin.

I don’t know if I should tell my mother. I don’t know is I should tell my younger sister to avoid her being in a similar position and being caught unawares by his advances. I don’t even know if he has not done this to her already.

I am disgusted and feel like I am living in a movie. I need help. I need advice.

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