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The BN Community Rocks! Read BleedBlue’s Heartwarming Ode to Her Fellow BellaNaijarians

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dreamstime_l_52799774It’s Friday 11th March and I somehow missed the hilarious post by Naija Single Girl (NSG), published a whole 3 days ago! {Click here if you missed it}

I read through the piece and I laughed so hard at my desk at this witty lady’s synopsis of the family of BN commenters. And then, I read through the comments section and it appears a few people missed the lightheartedness of the article and inevitably, arguments ensued.

Sigh…
Everyone has their reasons for preferring one blog over the other as indeed we have preferences for one dish over the other or one color over the other. That’s just life.

Can’t we all just get along?

But I’m not here to dwell on negative.

You see, the fact that we BN commenters don’t personally know each other is a good thing. In fact, scratch that. It’s a great thing! I’ve shared one too many personal stories on here that should typically be shared with only my nearest and dearest; stories that will give me a bad dose of awkward bashfulness should my identity be known. So, yes, the anonymity is brilliant.

However, I do genuinely feel connected to BN and the comments section. I recall I once found myself wondering how I would know when Jane Public had given birth to Saffron and how much I would love to send a gift of an ankara dress to baby S. Another day, I saw a movie with a horrendous number of snakes and wondered how Ada Nnewi would have coped with that particular scene, seeing as she’s told us of her awful snake-phobic experiences.

Before I move on… a big shout out to IceIceBaby and Koffie for those heart-warming words you sent in my direction. You made me smile. Thank you.

So in my 2nd paragraph up, I refer to BN commenters as family. Yes. Family.

Aside from Mz Socially Awkward who I know personally because we lived in Aberdeen for 11 years (yes Naija Single Girl, the same Aberdeen oh!) and Dooney who I recently met, I haven’t met anyone else from the comments section. At least not that I’m aware of…because heck for all I know “Mr. Egghead” could be that Structural Engineer two offices down from me. Or not… Oga Engineer is too serious about life and no matter how hard anyone tries, he never smiles or laughs. Mr. Egghead on the other hand, has 206 healthily hilarious bones in his body!

How can I not use this opportunity to pay tribute to my BN family?

whocares – You’re one person who has the ability to be funny without trying hard. First sentence of your comment and I’m already in stitches. I mean, someone even offered to buy you a beer just for making his/her day with your smart hilarity. Cheers!

Bobosteke & Lara Bian – You sage! Whenever I read your articles and your comments, you strike me as someone with a plethora of wise advice gained from really KNOWING. Your calm assessments on both the serious and the mundane make me feel like I should invite you over for some sofa chat and a glass of zobo (because if I say wine, they will say we are forming posh).

Jane Public aka Mama Saffron – Why you so fierce though? Hahaha… In my head, you’re that “sendless” friend that says what everyone else in the group is thinking, then dusts off and moves on while the rest just gawk in (slightly envious) admiration of your boldness. I will always have a seat for one Jane Public on my round-table. You available?

TA – Just like your name, I’ll keep it short and sweet. You’re cool. And I dig you.

Busarni – Okay I gotta admit that I don’t always agree with your views but you definitely grab my attention. You’re always up for a debate and no matter what response is given to your comments, you come back unwavering. Indomitable spirit, I believe it’s called. Go on s’oun!

Nahum – I love the way you unapologetically ride hard for your gender. Any opportunity you have to support the womenfolk, you get up there and do it. Chop knuckle Nahum sweetie’m.

Californiabawler – I know I keep saying people are funny but you my dear are FUN! Another thing I quite like about you is the way you tend to switch it up on us and give us a deep and thought-provoking comment when we never hessperrerit. I recall when I literally felt your pain about your mom’s only sister’s death due to pregnancy complications. Hugs m’dear. Open ended hugs.

Ivy – I wonder if you’re the same “Ivy O” who’s written a few BN-published articles. You’re hardly in the comments section but when you come through, you’re charming. Visit more often s’il vous plait.

ATL’s Finest – Haba! How can I not hail thee? With your strong-as-heck opinions? I remember you were the first person to introduce me to the term “monitoring spirits” in the urban-Naija context. I also recall how you took particular offense at the number of Naija versions of Adele’s “Hello”. You’re just a colorful character! And I love it!

Tosin – You superb, complex being. I’ve recently been introduced to one of your books and I can’t wait to start reading and perhaps see more of your fascinatingly fractured statements.

Iyke – Mr Poetic. BN would be a bit dull without you providing us the balance of the male agenda. Aside from gender matters, we are watching and waiting for you and Mz S.A. to meet up already. Oya na bros!

Mrs Chidukane – You really do seem like a sweet sort. I like reading your refreshing anecdotes and your memories from Port Harcourt living. Outside of cyber-life, I think we would be good pals.

Dr N. – Our resident medic; I imagine your nuggets of medical advice must have helped more people than you know. With you in the comments section and Dr. Craig in the features, all I can say is thank you! And how’s it going with the book club? Do you know you inspired me to join one and also include CSR on our agenda?

Iris – Sometimes I want to type a comment and find that you’ve said it already. You spill it so directly from my thoughts, to the extent that I literally have nothing further to say. Girl, it’s uncanny!

EdDreamz – How’s Jupiter these days? You’re one funny dude though. I can always rely on you for total randomness. I suppose you type it exactly as you think it. You don’t dress it up. Hashtag ‘No Filter’.

Mz Socially Awkward – My Sister! You beautiful, intelligent, devout, stylish, yallow-pawpaw, hardworking chic with a voice that can sing Mariah into the naughty corner! Everyone here already waxes about how special you are. I’m glad I have the added privilege of knowing you personally. Shine on abeg. Nothing do you!

There are so many others whose comments I look forward to seeing and who play their own part in shaping my perception of diversity of experiences. Que, Nene, Mulikat, Leah, Wale, Anon (and The Real Anon), Cindy, Marc Francis of Chelsea, Strit Kredibility, Drknite, Chichi, Majestic, Sugabelly, Lukman, Fashionista, That Idoma Girl, Concerned 9ja, Dee, That Gidi Girl, Ready, Fashola’s Lover (are you really?), ElessarisElendil, Cece, Noms, SMH, Observer, X-Factor, I no send, Nwanyi na aga aga, Tunmi, RIFF RAFF etc.

There are the people I miss…The Amaka from way back, Idak (this guy, come back jor!), Madman, Ginika, Tiki, Party Rider, Neveah etc.

Of course my post wouldn’t be complete without hailing our dear Bruno! Chai Bruno! I sometimes wonder if your somewhat misanthrope approach is just for our entertainment. You’re so controversial and sometimes we hate to love it but we do! I can almost bet my bottom dollar that everyone reads every line of every comment you make. Erm…if I ask you to tone down some of your ruthless opinions now, you may insult my ancestors. And if we fight, I know I won’t win. I fitn’t. You’re still my guy (or girl?) anyday!

Uche Pedro (all the best with Nickelodeon!), the BN team (Atoke, Jennifer, Richard and co) and BN Regulars (Isio, Esco, Dr. Craig, Okechukwu Ofili who I had a huge sapiosexual crush on – until my hubby threatened to call village meeting, Wana Udobang, Chef Fregz etc), thank you and well done for this forum you’ve inadvertently provided for us to digitally hang out.

While I’m fortunate to have a strong circle of good friends in the real world, it’s sometimes nice to get that other perspective from you guys.

I’ve shared some of my personal experiences – from those that shook me to my core like prolonged childhood rape, to the more jocular ones like the alarming rate at which my kids’ nanny was suddenly developing “swag”. In either scenario, BN commenters have been fantastic; from directing me to helpful sites, to giving me more supportive comments than the sometimes clichéd “It is well”, to sharing similar stories and how the situation was resolved, to providing practical solutions masked in humor. Let me not pretend some comments aren’t cruel, but I choose to sieve the wheat from the chaff and move on quickly.

**Side-note: Cyber bullying is NEVER okay. **

I saw in the comments to NSG’s article where a few people said BN commenters “live or project a double life” and there’s a lot of “fakeness and holier-than-thou” attitude. But but but…how can you be fake or even be bothered with projecting a double life when you’re typing in the comfort of absolute anonymity? For me, this is one place I feel free to share my true thoughts without fear or favor. As in, the Bleed Blue you see here is as authentic as it gets!

Some may say some of us commenters spend way too much time on BN. If it’s a crime, I’m guilty. And that’s fine by me.

So what I’m really here to say is this:
Ladies and Gents of the BN community, whatever label we’re given or not given, all I see in the comments section are people who share experiences – good and bad, people who although sometimes get rather unkind in their remarks, most times give me lots of reasons to smile, laugh and even cry a little. All I see here is normal life. All I see here is valid.

And truth be told…I kinda love you guys.

The End.
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Bleed Blue is Christian. She’s a good man’s wife, mother of two ace boys and a practicing oil and gas lawyer. She also dabbles in photography and her work has been featured in local and international press. She loves the drums and plays them till her hands hurt. She’d love to see a better Nigeria in her generation and in the meantime is doing what she can to make the next person’s life more bearable. She owns a blog, but will not tell what it’s called. Call it shyness.

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