The Circle of Life

Posted on Wednesday, February 23rd, 2011 at 11:00 AM

By Glory Edozien

To live doesn’t mean you’re alive- Nikki Minaj.

As we crossed over into the year 2011, I made a resolution to myself that I have made every year and failed at woefully- I vowed I would loose a significant amount of weight. Throughout January, I toyed with the idea of joining a gym, as I continued gulping down huge amounts of ice cream, cake, chocolates and enough food to save a small village of starving children. It was not until I saw a picture of myself on the Future Awards Red Carpet that I put on my now cobweb-ridden trainers and hired myself a personal trainer. Till today, I am unsure if that picture is an accurate representation of me or a wake-up call from God to send me straight to the treadmill. Either way, it suffices to say that that picture, which is now posted on various Google search pages, will be a constant reminder of my near resemblance to Yokozuna.

Going to the gym has brought with it various benefits. Obviously, combined with a decrease in food inundated with high content of saturated fats, it is likely to produce, hopefully, a visible difference in my weight, but it also gives me the space and time to unclutter my mind. Living in a City, where there are constant demands on your time has a way of preventing you from giving thought to a particular topic for more than 5 minutes, as you continue to make knee jerk decisions for lack of time to complete particular tasks. But when you are on treadmill, pounding on its rotating surface, alone with your thoughts and the songs coming from your Ipod earphones, there is nothing left to do but think.

It was during this music-induced fat burning session that I started to ponder about life. It seems for every stage of life, there is always something we want to attain – some future goal we are striving toward. Right from birth, subconsciously as a toddler, you are filled with an unconscious desire to rise up from your Pampers-covered bottom and place one foot in front of the other. Your family watches with glee and absolute delight as they see you manage to achieve this feat, and it is from here that the quest to achieve life-induced goals begin. The desire to excel in primary school, then secondary school, then JAMB, then university, then to get a job. Even within these tasks there are other subconscious quests that preoccupy our minds – the desire to fit in, the desire to be the best, the desire to be liked. Then after graduation, we women become suffused to the point of combustion, with the desire to get married and to have children. If we haven’t achieved this by 30, this desire takes over our lives and saturates every conversation and prayer point until the desire is completely manifested. For the men, it is the desire to make money. This craving has turned every man into a self-born hustler, striving to turn one kobo into billions of Naira overnight, with some breaking their backs in the process and others turning to alcohol and other substances or devious activity when this desire cannot be adequately fulfilled. Then comes the quest to gather enough financial resources to cater for these children and ourselves. The desire to build our own house, pay off the car loan, pay the children’s school fees and ensure they have all the trappings of life we didn’t enjoy. The next stage is to continue to wish your children well, stand beside them as proud parents at their graduation, and wear the best lace money can buy at their weddings, and naming ceremonies of your grandchildren. After all of this, the inevitable happens, life on earth ends and life in the afterlife begins.

It is sad that the beginning and end of anyone’s life can be summed up in one paragraph, filled with a quest to attain something greater than the last achievement. At the end, the accolades themselves are written in colourfully published obituary programmes and still left on earth after we have exited. So the question becomes: what then is the point of life? Is it to keep striving for something greater, worrying that you haven’t achieved the same levels of accolade as the next person?

I’m 35 and unmarried!

I’m 40 and I don’t own my own home!

I am 25 and I dont have my dream job!

I am 60 and I don’t have a grand child!

It is not that these accolades are not in themselves important, but I dare say that it is what happens between these eventful times that are of even more importance – the trips we went on, the friends we made, the new types of food we tried, the books we read, the plays we watched, the places we visited, the stories we heard, the times we smiled, the times we cried, the times we laughed, the people we shared all those moments with, and the lessons life taught us along the way. These are the times that make our life more colourful. These are the times when we are alive to life, not when we are robotically pursuing one achievement or the other.

So before you get dragged down by your inability to climb one more step on life’s ladder, how about you celebrate where you are now? Take time to enjoy yourself, make new friends, find simple things that make you happy even when the world tells you there is nothing to be happy about. If you are single, instead of waiting for that man to buy you flowers, go ahead and buy yourself a bouquet of roses! If you are waiting on God to bless you with a child, continue to pray but make time out to visit with your friends’ children and enjoy the marriage God has blessed you with. If you can’t wait to make your first One Million Naira, go ahead and enjoy the one hundred thousand you currently earn. We spend so much time fussing about the next big achievement that we totally forget to enjoy the little blessings God has already given us. You may not have a grandchild but your children are alive and healthy. You may not have that dream job, but somehow you manage to pay the bills and feed yourself every month. You may not have a husband but you have wonderful friends and family that love and care for you. There are little achievements and blessings around us which we ought to celebrate everyday. Truth is: every good thing will come, but it is what you do in between those times that will count. It’s time to start living like you are alive!

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  • 49 Comments on “The Circle of Life”

    Comments
    • mia February 23, 2011 at 11:10 AM

      God bless you for this write up. Just what i needed to read. You are soooooooooo RIIIGHTTTTTT! The pressures of life *sigh*.

    • Ready February 23, 2011 at 11:11 AM

      Hear, hear. But you know I had to google this picture you were talking about since I hadn’t seen it before. Best of luck with working out, and remember beauty is more than the physical.

      • storm February 24, 2011 at 10:37 AM

        lol…me too, that was the first thing i did, before reading the rest of the article

    • Gennyz # 1 Fan!!! February 23, 2011 at 11:14 AM

      Waw!!!! This was for me!!! Thanks glory…u ain’t never told a lie!

    • nnenna February 23, 2011 at 11:38 AM

      I just had this conversation with a friend….thank you

    • faith February 23, 2011 at 11:40 AM

      i av been avoiding my married friends for a while now cos av been feelin down…but after reading dis post am callin dem now…thanks dear…..

    • Prince February 23, 2011 at 11:41 AM

      Nice Write up! Totally Spot on! Needed this to make me think more positively.

    • That Girl February 23, 2011 at 12:14 PM

      Excellent write up!

    • ogy February 23, 2011 at 12:27 PM

      Word Gloria! Word! Thank U̶̲̥̅̊ for this

    • changing faces February 23, 2011 at 12:42 PM

      Wonderful write up…Glory you have an amazing gift!

      i have often pondered on these issues, and agree that life passes byy while we fret about what car our friends are driving and the 20million naira p/a job the other friend just got. i have learnt to love God, be thankful and content, and just enjoy my life! afterall one sure thing is death… and all these things wont matter thereafter!

    • dammie February 23, 2011 at 12:59 PM

      The article was brilliant….but why u gotta quote nicki minaj?? huh! lol
      but seriously a life with meaning can only be found with God..May He help us all!

      http://www.sugarysea.blogspot.com

    • Gbemi February 23, 2011 at 2:21 PM

      I flew to google first *chuckle*
      Well said Glory.
      Don’t put off living today by dreaming of some magical rose garden tomorrow. Enjoy the beauty of roses blooming outside your window today.

      http://www.gbemisoke.blogspot.com

    • Ib February 23, 2011 at 2:21 PM

      Glory i just have to say this,u might not have all uv asked for at the moment but know one thing,u have been a blessing to the lives of many…mine inclusive.Although wev never met,just know that i love u,many of ur readers do and God loves u even more .In fact,He is concerned about u more than u can ever imagine.He has blessed you with a talent.U are indeed blessed and highly favoured…thanks once again Glory..(yes,your write ups are that poignant).Remain favoured!!.

    • Ifeoma-adiagwuagwu February 23, 2011 at 2:39 PM

      Fantastic, smashing. Yes, u are so right, it is better to keep it simple. Nice…

    • Mariaah February 23, 2011 at 3:02 PM

      I made the tough decision to count my blessings and acknowledge what I have at the moment. I am not where I want to be or where I would have loved to be but I am grateful. It gets at me sometimes but I pick up myself up at the end of the day..

    • ifeoma n. February 23, 2011 at 3:05 PM

      now thats word. u hit the nail on the head.very motivating. on point. kudos!!!!!!

    • BC February 23, 2011 at 3:39 PM

      What can I say Glory? You leave me speechless. Really.

    • kreamyy February 23, 2011 at 3:46 PM

      Luv,luv,luv it. Tanks Gloria. Dis article just made me smile

    • ChiBaby February 23, 2011 at 3:58 PM

      Word!!!!

    • Chichi February 23, 2011 at 4:01 PM

      Gloria, thank you!! The contents in this article has been toiling around in my mind and i’ve been meaning to write something about it but could never find the words to express my thoughts. This reminds me of what my father always says. ‘Enjoy the little things because they are for free’. In todays society people are so obsessed with reputation. How much they earn, how much they have achieved; that they forget to enjoy or even take notice of the simple and free things. e.g. peace and quiet, time with friends, normality, simplicity, just being your self. I’ve got a friend, who is always quick to remind me that I am not where I was last year and next year I wouldnt where I am right now. In all situations count your blessings and share them if you can.

    • jade February 23, 2011 at 6:14 PM

      Amen to that, i thank God for where i am now, husbandless, homeless, and in a job thats not so great….lol with great friends, a wonderful family and lots of FUN!!! God is good the time and all the time God is good.

    • Tina Ike February 23, 2011 at 7:21 PM

      Thanks Glory for this, as i have responded to your post(s) in the past, this one truly had me speechless(not a usual for me), i really believe that those who use their talents to touch lives should be highly commended. “The circle of life” indeed, at it stage of life we all show stop smell the roses(blessings) we have. Personally i thank God for where i am right now, wonderful husband, new career, and all the up and downs life throws at you. In a spiritual view point i would say that we are promised greatness if we can only see the joys in our daily trials(paraphasing). Truly remarkable write up as i was personally moved. Keep up the great work BN!

    • Myne Whitman February 23, 2011 at 7:28 PM

      Very very inspiring, I love this!

    • oma February 23, 2011 at 7:39 PM

      u couldn’t have put it better…… time to live and stop existing

    • partyrider February 23, 2011 at 7:46 PM

      In one sentence : MAXIMIZE THE MOMENT!!!

      Life is a date locked between two hyphens;the date you come,and the date you lived.
      no matter how short your life is,you dont want to be remembered as that person who went through life sulking

    • partyrider February 23, 2011 at 7:49 PM

      In one sentence : MAXIMIZE THE MOMENT!!!

    • Mary007 February 24, 2011 at 1:16 AM

      I have learnt to be thankful for all little things in my life so I can really enjoy the big achievements and also learnt to say NO to rubbish so I can say yes to the right things

    • ops February 24, 2011 at 1:17 AM

      haha…like gbemisoke -i flew to google as well. God bless you Glory for this beautiful post. I recently relocated back to naija and been avoiding my old friends cos i didnt want to start hearing “you have added so much weight”, ‘eeya, God will give u a job o” …but now i feel like…..and so, what the heck?! lol

    • Kilonsparkles February 24, 2011 at 3:47 AM

      Best article I’ve read on Bella.

    • feejay February 24, 2011 at 8:14 AM

      You made my day! Well written and with facts! GOOD JOB :)

    • Fran February 24, 2011 at 8:26 AM

      Very nice and inspiring post!

      Your points are spot on! My dear, we all really have to live for today and enjoy each and every moment! No one is guaranteed tomorrow, so rather than worry about what we are not even sure about we should all live and maximise what we have and are sure about.

      Just realised I didn’t know what you looked like and also went to check you out on google – you’re very pretty with very nice skin. All the best with losing weight. I always recommend going on a special K and fruit only diet for two weeks coupled with exercise. Trust me it works wonders for shifting the weight and to maintain it, just carry on with the exercise and introduce all the regular foods but with very reasonable portions (never eat more than what will overflow out of both hands cupped).

    • Ronnie's Jeans February 24, 2011 at 9:53 AM

      very inspiring. I read this and I paused ‘cos you never realise you had life going on auto pilot with your heart beating fast. It’s from one challenge to the next.Thank God for this, thank God for my Life.”Everything good will come”

    • ifeoma February 24, 2011 at 11:51 AM

      hehehe. i have 2 say i googled d photo immediately. lol. i agree wit ur write up completely. as humans our thirst for “more” can get in the way of the simple things that make life woth livin. good topic

    • omo ola February 24, 2011 at 2:11 PM

      wow! i am a huge fan of bella naija but never once left a comment, well until now! Loove it…i thank God for where I am now, nothing to complain about, but every lady should read this cos when they see what their other friends have: the job, husband, money etc..they forget what they have and envy, ignore and sometimes end the friendship.
      we should always cherish every moment, cos life has no rewind button.

    • Tiki February 24, 2011 at 3:55 PM

      Thumbs up Gloria! This is a fabulous one, reminds us of the essential things in life…in the words of Jordin Sparks ‘One step at a time, there’s no need to rush…It’s gonna happen when it’s supposed to happen!’ I’ll be keeping a printout of this article in my purse for when I sometimes forget to count my blessings…

    • funk February 24, 2011 at 5:39 PM

      m loving it glory……………u r great…kul stuff

    • NNENNE February 24, 2011 at 5:58 PM

      Life could be better.It could also be worst.I take it moment by moment.One day at a time.

    • K-Wears February 25, 2011 at 12:39 AM

      i totally agree with you and this was exactly me, until 2 yrs ago when i decided to start living and enjoying where i am now against where God is taking me, and i simply have no regrets at all, life is too short, we should count our blessings and name them one by one.
      Asiko laye, to ba lo siwaju, atun lo seyin ni.

    • ruzystone February 25, 2011 at 12:53 PM

      this is nice, we have to be thankful for every thing we have and every moment we breath………………….

    • Oluwasayomi endowed February 25, 2011 at 3:46 PM

      very nice article,we are always in a hurry to achieve,not to feel left behind,we often forget to stop and smell the roses of life,God makes ALL things beautiful in HIS time.Life is not a race its an experience we should enjoy to the fullest,there is a different finish line for everyone

    • jennietobbie March 1, 2011 at 7:24 AM

      this is beautifully deep…..now I can sleep and enjoy my night! Thanks Glory

    • Mel March 21, 2011 at 2:16 PM

      Thanks dear, u re rite…the pressures of life, huh. Thank God, He gave His Son to die to redeem us from all dis. Good tins are coming my way and for all those who believe in Him.

    • lulubabe March 22, 2011 at 5:11 AM

      Glory I know you’ve probably read it a thousand times that you’re a superb writer and all but I must give it to you, your style of writing with all the funny bits, irony, advice and conclusions you draw up sometimes, is very unique!…this is true talent and i’m happy you chose to share it with us your readers. I will be looking forward to more stories from you…and in addition to your article, we should all ”Let Go and Let God!”..God bless..;)

    • Tyna March 24, 2011 at 1:17 PM

      its a beautiful write up wit alots of facts……………

    • Edem Badu March 27, 2011 at 5:52 AM

      Loved this inspirational piece – Just what I had been suffering from for the last few weeks and now its time for me to live it up and enjoy my journey :)
      Kudos to you all the way from Australia – Thank you!

    • nnamdi March 29, 2011 at 3:53 PM

      totally love this article………..it simply tells us the real essence of life

    • Mariella April 6, 2011 at 6:48 PM

      Any article that quotes Nicki Minaj is suspect in ma books. But nice article though, we should all take time to smell the flowers. Life is 2 short.
      Btw in the spirit of the article, check out beauty in the world by Macy Gray- you will love it. http://www.youtube.com/results?search_query=beauty+in+the+world+macy+gray&aq=1

    • Kunmi May 14, 2011 at 9:38 AM

      I LOVE THIS ARTICLE. It make sense dieeee.. :)

    • Esther February 5, 2013 at 10:03 PM

      i love….God bless you dear