Mfonobong Inyang: Valuable Game For The Second Half of 2025

I can’t tell you what it is, I can only tell you what it feels like – 2025 has probably been the fastest year of my life. When things happen with so much speed, it’s usually difficult, if not impossible, to process the implications of those events in real time. Some of these nuggets are from my journal because I try as much as possible to document outcomes while also interrogating the causalities. The simple deduction from this is that there will be certain things that you won’t have immediate answers for, but ultimately, you will gain important perspectives which should shape your strategies and influence your operations going forward. Let us not lie and let us not steal, you are not small in this world – you play a far more consequential role in determining your life’s outcomes than you know it or at least give yourself credit for.

The Subtlety Of Growth

As children, our situational awareness was in large part inspired by markers. One of the ways you knew you were growing older was that your parents would organise a birthday party every year for you. You could also tell you were growing older by your progression in school as you were moved from class to class. There were many other markers, such as festivities, that also underscored the passage of time. However, as we got older and interacted with the real world outside those structured environments, we began to lose a sense of growth because the markers weren’t as pronounced. For example, you can have grown in influence even though your social media numbers or your bank account may not yet suggest so, and if you don’t know this, you will be scared to death to update your rate card.

Another thing about growth is this: you may not only be unaware that you have grown, but also be blissfully ignorant of the increased demands of that level. That is the flip side of not recognising your growth; it’s the lack of cognition of the discipline required to navigate that space. Remember Uncle Ben’s famous piece of advice to Peter Parker? “With great power comes great responsibility” – one interpretation of this statement is that growth will hold you to a higher standard than you would ordinarily be held. If you don’t intentionally invest in your growth, you will lose the perks that come with being the best version of yourself. The egg that doesn’t develop would never experience what it means to be a butterfly; not just to flutter but also to actively participate in the process of cross-pollination. One of the biggest lies ever told is that you are okay the way you are; that may be true for your essence, but there is an iteration of yourself that is required to function on certain levels.

The Unspoken Benefits of Disappointment

This might be a tough concept to accept for those who have been taught to believe that every ‘bad’ thing that occurs in their lives can be blamed on their community or “village people.” While we often joke about this, I want to be honest: even your worst enemies hold as much power as your mind allows them. If you live long enough, you are likely to gain the valuable gift of perspective.

No one prays for heartbreak, but it can turn out to be one of the best things that ever happens to you, leading you to the love of your life. Losing a job may feel devastating, but it could trigger your entrepreneurial instincts and spark new opportunities. Receiving an eviction notice from your landlord might be the motivation you need to start your journey toward owning property.

This isn’t to say that every undesirable outcome is a blessing; rather, you should trust that God can use everything—both the good and the bad—to create a beautiful symphony in your life that soothes your soul.

Movies are a fantastic form of art, but your life won’t always unfold like the stories you see on screen. Your path to greatness may not follow the conventional route; you might need to take a detour at some point. God could be doing you a great favour by keeping you out of the spotlight because, once you are in public view, you no longer have the chance for rehearsals. Privacy allows for personal development without the harsh scrutiny and criticism of the public.

By reframing your thoughts in this way, you may find that you are less despondent and hopeless.

It’s Okay To Quit

Again, this one might rock your understanding, especially if you grew up in the peak aspire-to-maguire era where one of the famous lamba was “winners never quit and quitters never win”. Don’t get me wrong, that statement in itself is not erroneous, but context is key. What if I told you that letting go of someone or something good can be one of the best decisions you can ever make in your life? You see, most of us have been conditioned into a binary thinking. So we find it easy to decide between good and evil, but when it comes to making a decision between good and great, the lines become blurred. I have a simple template when it comes to my career or professional life, and it comes in the form of a quartet of questions: What should I do more of? What should I do less of? What should I start doing? What should I stop doing?

One of the reasons most of us struggle to quit or pivot from something detrimental to our strategic interests is something known in economics as sunk cost fallacy; this is a situation where a person is reluctant to abandon a strategy or course of action because of a heavy investment in it, even when it is clear that abandonment would be more beneficial. Many people would have still been alive today if they had quit certain toxic relationships; the emotional investment they made in an ungrateful partner clouded their sense of judgment. Life happens to even the best of us; sometimes you have to cut your losses and keep it moving. Lot’s wife was more vested in her history than she was in her destiny; that’s why your imagination must be more animated than your memories – if you’re still stuck on the ‘good old days’ syndrome, you might find yourself with more movement without advancement.

The Prison Of People’s Perceptions

This point is critical, especially given the social context of digital media, where most people create content and do things that are borne from a standpoint of approval. Clout is the new drug because most people are approval addicts. Classism makes folks want so bad to belong to an imaginary group of exclusive people that are somehow superior to others. Why do people project fake lives? Simple, most people have been conditioned by society to worship wealth, so they figured that to get any modicum of respect, they must project wealth even when it’s non-existent. Why are people desperate to become popular, which is not a bad thing by the way – it’s because people have seen society equate popularity with intelligence and even given them a preeminence in the cultural scheme of things. Some people can’t call out the BS of government even when bad policies affect them directly because they want others to think they are too financially comfortable to be bothered by anything.

The Chief Commander, Ebenezer Obey, did a number with his classic, Ketekete. It’s a song about a man, his son and a horse who were on their way and were intermittently interrupted by people who had different views on how best they should commute. When the man and his son rode on the back – some people said it was unfair on the horse to carry the weight of two people at the same time, when the man rode on the horse while his son walked – some people accused him of being an irresponsible father, when the son rode on the horse while his father walked – some people accused the son of being insensitive to his father’s health and when both of then refused to ride the horse and chose to walk – some people mocked them for being stupid enough to own a horse but not use it. In a nutshell, whatever you do, people will have opinions. The question then becomes: are you going to be true to your authentic self and your convictions, or are you going to contort and twist into a pretzel just to be accepted and belong? If you somehow walk on water, some people will find a way of explaining it away by saying you did that because you can’t swim. My guy, if nobody talks about you, then you’re a nobody – whether na true dem talk or na lie. I say no be small thing o.

Put Some Restrictions on Your Freedoms

This point feels like a sequel to the first, and you’ll understand why. As children, one of our obsessions was the desire to grow up and do all the things that adults did. We believed that once we came of age, we would finally be free to do whatever we wanted. I can tell you categorically and without fear of contradiction that adulthood is a scam in that sense. It’s not all fun and games, and I won’t lie about that. What adulthood teaches you is a heightened awareness of the consequences of your actions. For example, you are free to sleep in bed all day, but the consequence is that you will end up broke. You’re free to smoke weed and abuse substances, but the consequences may be serious health issues like lung, liver, or kidney diseases. There is freedom of speech, but if you infringe on someone else’s rights, you might face liability for slander or libel. Even on the freeway, there are speed limits. Maturity is realising that while all things may be lawful, not all things are beneficial.

This is another reason why emotional intelligence is essential; it helps you manage your emotions instead of acting on every impulse. Psychosis occurs when a person’s inhibitions are lowered to the point that they cannot distinguish between reality and delusion. Just because you can physically harm someone doesn’t mean you should; if that person unfortunately dies, you might only be charged with manslaughter if your lawyer can successfully argue that there was no premeditation on your part. That’s why you rarely see a professional fighter engage in a brawl with someone who doesn’t have the same training; their decision to walk away is a reflection of strength, not weakness. Determine what your core values are so that your actions and inactions align with that framework. Keep that in mind!