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Damilola Ibidunni: The Choice to Love

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The greatest thing you’ll ever learn is just to love and be loved in return.” St August of Hippo

Every day we are faced with the choice to love or not to love. I am not speaking of love as a feeling. Love is the awareness that wraps those feelings and the will to let them thrive. There can be no love without the choice to love. Yes, we may feel the attraction, but to follow it, we have to choose. We may sense its alluring pull, but to birth, it we have to decide.

As beings, we cannot do without love; it is an unfolding part in us. Despite having its nature embedded in us, there is no guarantee that we understand the intricacies of loving and living loved. We often misplace its aim; misconstrue its purpose and fault its connection with others. Some say it happens to them at first sight, others say it grows on them. But one thing is certain; if we allow ourselves, we are all capable of experiencing this beautiful thing called love. Yet I wonder, what really is love?

Love is that unbreakable bond which connects families, relatives and friends. Love is the presence of that loved one, even when they are long gone, they still live in us, their memories cherished, their legacies treasured, held loosely by the strand called love!

We come to love not by finding a perfect person, but by learning to see an imperfect person perfectly. Unfortunately, sometimes we never look beyond the skin, the lips, the shape, the size to the very soul! We may choose what we see. Those once hardened by life can soften for love; those ruined and made weak by experience can be strengthened by love. That soul buried by years of harsh realities, altered by pain and hardship can be redeemed by love. When you stand before that one you claim you love, remember love is that which heals! They may be broken, be part of the soothing balm. To love is nothing. To be loved is something. But to be loved and understood by the person you love is everything.

Self is the enemy of love. Our ego always gets in the way of love and leads us to make wrong choices. We might pretend to be perfect, but there is no perfect one. We have our flaws, so do our partners. When we stop judging and start loving, those flaws are seen for what they are, beautiful imperfections.

Rewrite your love story. Live your own love story. Notwithstanding the conditions, if you seek for love properly, you will certainly find it and if you don’t, it will find you.

Photo Credit: Dreamstime | Spotmatik

Ibidunni Damilola views the world as a stage and everyday an adventure through which he explores his vast interests. He is intrigued by the cores of humanity and its complexity, which he reflects in his crafts. Follow him on IG @ibidunnidamilola and on Twitter @iamibidunni.

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