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8 Years After an Accident that Left Her with Facial Scars, Filmmaker LowlaDee Tells Her Inspiring Story

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Dolapo Adeleke is a 25 year old filmmaker who is slowly making her mark in the Nigerian film industry. The director, fondly called “LowlaDee“, is the brain behind Brave, and A Place Called Happy.

On the 20th of August, 2007, Dolapo was in a car accident. The brakes of the car she was riding in failed. Dolapo, sitting in the passenger’s seat, without a functioning seatbelt, crashed through the dashboard and windscreen of the car.

Today, the 8th year anniversary of the accident that left her with facial scars, LowlaDee shares the inspiring story of her walk through a very difficult time of her life; and how she found purpose through the pain.

We hope you are inspired by her heartfelt story and how she sees life now, in spite of all the pain she went through. 
***

The Dolapo Background
I was born 6th September, 1990 in Kano. I grew up always being selected to give speeches, representing my primary school in debates. I wrote my first book ‘Little White Hen’ in primary three. I was sure in high school that I wanted to be another ‘Oprah’. It was my ultimate dream to own a TV show and help gazillions of less privileged people. I had published my second book ‘Flesh and Blood’ by SS2 and even won a national award for it. I was going to achieve my dreams at every cost. What was going to stop me?

A Foreboding
One night, in 2007, my parents came to my room and started showering prayers over me. I didn’t really like spiritual stuff like that but my parents told me our pastor had called from South Africa saying his wife had a dream where I had an accident and was burnt beyond recognition. He told my parents not to allow me go out till after prayers and when the leading says so. I was thought ‘what kind of wahala is this one?’ After the prayers I just went to bed. I didn’t say the prayers, I’m not sure I cared at the time.

The Accident
I had graduated from Dansol High School in 2007 and waiting to resume at Covenant University.My childhood best friend called me up and said we needed to pick up our handbooks from Covenant. We agreed I’d come over to her house and we’d go together.

I woke up feeling a bit irritated at everything. My grandma had said I shouldn’t go out because she had a nightmare where a baby was in a pool of blood and crying. That upset me. I’m like what’s up with all these dark talk?

That morning as I was to go with my Dad to pick up some of the school documents, he looked at me and for the very first time he said ‘See how beautiful my daughter is. See her glowing skin’. I think I truly felt beautiful with conviction for the first time.

On getting to my father’s office, he told me I would be going in the driver’s 504 car and not in his. I didn’t want to go in that car. I wanted to go in my dad’s ‘fine car’; but the way he screamed at me, I had to go in the driver’s car. When I got into the 504, I sat in the front seat and the first thing I tried on was the seatbelt. It didn’t work and sadly at that time, wearing your seatbelt wasn’t enforced in Lagos.

We got to my friend’s house, and the driver was trying to park, but the car kept moving. I just thought it would stop, but after my friend’s house is a high slope. The car started going very fast. The driver began screaming ‘brake brake!’. I didn’t have time to think. Everything happened so fast. We crashed into a fence and my face broke the windscreen and the dashboard. I remember hearing the blood pouring out of my face like a tap. I remember I jumped out immediately though I couldn’t see. I remember they made me sit on the floor. The car even burst into flames after I had jumped out; but they put it out.

My friend’s brother rushed me to the nearest hospital where I was immediately attended to. As I opened my eyes hours after, the first thing I saw, crushed my heart. It was my father crying. I managed to say ‘Daddy why are you crying? Please stop crying’. I remember him rushing out to call my mother. My mothers eyes were swollen and she only kept saying, ‘Dolapo can you see me? Please tell me you can. How many fingers can you see?’ They thought I was blind.

I remembered being transferred to General hospital at 2:00am that same day and the doctor had given a report that I may not be able to think well again. I had a fractured skull. In fact, my forehead skin had chopped off. You could see the bone.

It was truly a trying time for my loved ones.

The Face. The Scar. The Pain
I later got transferred to another private clinic where I was for about two months till I managed to resume school. As at the early stages in the hospital, I still didn’t know the extent of the damage to my face because there were no mirrors around me; but I know that everyone who came to see me burst into tears. I couldn’t understand it but I would tell them that I’d be okay.3-2

One fateful day, I was taking chicken soup with a stainless spoon, and somehow I turned the back of the spoon and I saw my face. Blood of God. I cannot describe the pain that pierced through my very soul. I couldn’t recognize myself. I was uncontrollable, I cried so much. The whole hospital was on standstill that day. Everyone was sad; nobody knew how to help me feel better. It was from this day that the real trauma of the accident began for me.

What did I do to deserve this? I was only 16. I had dreams. How was I to resume school looking scarred and unrecognizable? You see, people tried to talk me out of this pain. But you can’t motivate or talk someone out of pain sometimes.

Thank God for God, family, and friends who stood beside me. My mind would have been wrecked, my spirit broken but they were there for me. Every step of the way. I am so grateful for the support system I had.

Surgery and Skin Grafts
Because of the serious damage to my forehead, where the skin had chopped off, my parents couldn’t afford a surgery. I was transferred to Ilorin Teaching Hospital where I was to undergo skin grafting. The skin graft failed…woefully.

The doctor called my mom and I to his office and he looked at me with so much compassion and said to me. ‘When a car has an accident, and becomes dented, the mechanic can only try to make the car look better but it can never be new again.’ As he spoke, the tears just flowed because I understood perfectly what he meant. But I wasn’t a car. I am a human being – a young human being with feelings. How was I supposed to live through this? I felt my life was over and all my dreams had just been snatched from me.

One morning I woke up with so much anger. I wanted to fight. And I wanted to win. I decided to resume school despite the way I looked. I didn’t know what I was getting into but I knew I needed to fight back at life somehow. To make a point I did not yet know.

Reintegration Into School Life
I resumed school and I can remember I wore a wig with a fringe. The scar on my forehead wasn’t one to show off at all. It was still fresh. The one on my cheeks, I couldn’t do anything about it. The first day I got to school, I walked into the cafeteria and the first person I saw was my very close friend. She looked at me and looked away. This was like my very own sister but she couldn’t recognize me. I tapped her and said, “Sola, it’s me Dolapo”
She screamed so loud and she hugged me. In fact, all my secondary school friends at Covenant University became a support system for me. It felt good but so many people didn’t know my history and so I would get awkward stares, and whispers when I passed along.

While trying to adjust, there were times I just wanted to quit school. The psychological torture of the accident was so intense. I just couldn’t do it anymore. One day, I was crying in the toilet and then two of my classmates overheard. They truly comforted me with inspiring words and I stayed in school.

I decided I was going to share my story in front of the whole school during a chapel service. Just maybe I needed to give a reason for the fringe hairdo and the scars so the stares could stop. It was a huge step for me but I did it and it truly did mark a new beginning for my remaining days in school. The awkward stares and whispers greatly reduced because people now knew the history.

LowladeeWhen I saw that my face was beginning to look better in 200 level, I became obsessed with taking webcam pictures because I was so excited to see a glimpse of how I looked like before. I took pictures and then I would compile them with Picasa and put music under it. I discovered I could tell stories with pictures so I moved to moviemaker and from taking pictures, I began recording short webcam clips featuring my roommates, fix music etc. Some of the clips went a bit viral. Then, some school units started coming to me to edit ads for their programs.

This gave birth to the passion for filmmaking. I began to conceive a bigger picture and I was going to achieve it.

I graduated from Covenant University in 2011 with a good 2:1 in Mass Communication.

More Surgery?
I had graduated from school into the ‘real’ world and fantasized about getting my face back through plastic surgery. A part of me did not accept the scars. Through a sponsored trip in 2012 to meet with a successful plastic surgeon in South Africa, I was shocked when the doctor advised me to leave things the way they were. He told me surgeries are 50/50 and no plastic surgery in the world could ‘totally’ take away scars and my face shouldn’t be that experiment again. He advised to invest in professional make up kits; but I couldn’t wear that kind of makeup everyday. Plus it’s not just my thing. The thought of anything going wrong was scary.

I was heartbroken and I remember, Mai Atafo had called me while I was there and for the first time, words of encouragement did ease the pain. He said to me ‘Dolapo those who truly call the shots are behind the camera. In fact I want you to take a nice artsy picture of yourself without the fringe and frame it. By the time you are 27, you will laugh at yourself for worrying so much about scars.’ I will never forget those words. An ounce of courage was added to me.

Also I contacted Kechi Okwuchi, a survivor of the Sosoliso plane crash. She said to me ‘Don’t be afraid. You will be fine’. Hearing that statement from someone who survived with burns on her body and had undergone more surgeries than I had, blew my mind away.
It is true that where you problem stops is where another man’s own starts. So hearing ‘It would be fine’ from someone who had been through worse pain, made me believe it will really be fine. I drew strength from her courage and I am riding on!

lola2

Pain to Purpose
It is true that in your pain, you find purpose. I had registered my production company in 2011 just after graduation. I couldn’t afford to go to film school so I went with the harder way of learning to make films- by just making them and so far it’s been a soothing ride. Right now, I write, produce, direct and edit professionally.

Brave, short film, starring Adesua Etomi and Wole Ojo became the first officially released work from the company and the awards, reception and recognition is so inspiring. We produced our first Television movie ‘A Place Called Happy’ starring Blossom Chukwujeku and Sika Osei. We are working on our first Television series as well. We have produced corporate videos for some of the most prestigious companies in the country.

Also, just recently I was nominated under ‘Best Film Director’ at the NEA awards with iconic people such as Kunle Afolayan, Mildred Okwo and it feels unreal.
I felt unqualified, but, it shows that the big picture I conceived back in school will come to pass. All these make me believe that when we are strong enough to flip the coin of pain, we find purpose and in purpose, we rule. We find joy.

Lowladee-Brave

Looking to the Future
The inner scars are harder to fight. I still fight it till today. I have been on a fringe since 2007 because of the failed surgery on the forehead. Will I wear a fringe forever? Perhaps it is the Lowladee trademark? Heck! It is my reality. I wear a fringe for me. It makes me comfortable and I realized on time that I owed no one an explanation as to how I want to live through my reality.

I won’t say I’m totally healed, but I am a work in progress. I am still nervous about being in front of the video camera but I am hoping someday I would be courageous enough to film a biopic on my story. 🙂

I remember one day while in Uni, my hall potter at that time called me to her office and said, ‘You will marry a good man’. It was awkward but it makes sense now because it is true. I met the man of my dreams in 2011 and all I can say is that my hall potter was right. Love when genuine can heal broken spirits and I am grateful I have that 200%. I am grateful I have that good man.

My story may not even be compared to what some of you have been through or going through, but we become stronger when we fight. We are larger than life and we cannot let life mess us up all the time. We cannot afford to live life on our knees. We must FIGHT and WIN on our feet.

It has been 8 years and I am grateful to God for life publicly. I am just so grateful that today my friends are not shedding tears over me, or family members calling up my parents to remember 8 years of my passing.

I am alive and grateful for being able to overcome years of depression and anger.I honestly never thought I could look close to what I looked like before the accident again and I am grateful that I can look at myself today and smile at my transition.
Thank you for taking the time to read. Please celebrate with me!

Thank you to my family and my friends who have continued to stand by me. I love you!

114 Comments

  1. Scarred too

    August 20, 2015 at 1:48 pm

    My Dear your story reminded me of mine. It’s never easy to overcome the scars. It’s a journey with dips and turns. It never ends. I also found love but still I found it was not enough to make me feel whole. I still hide my scars. Especially these daysi don’t feel like being judged first by the scars as our society has become so vain. Thank you for sharing.

    • kiny

      August 20, 2015 at 3:41 pm

      I have discoloration patches on my face, neck and shoulders. It was really hard for me growing up and in secondary school cause people would ask if someone poured hot water on me when I was a child, if my skin is reacting or ‘what is wrong with your skin’ look.
      Acceptance comes from within, I have learnt.

    • goodiebagman

      August 20, 2015 at 11:37 pm

      “My story may not even be compared to what some of you have been through or going through, but we become stronger when we fight. We are larger than life and we cannot let life mess us up all the time. We cannot afford to live life on our knees. We must FIGHT and WIN on our feet.”

      These words you wrote will save lives. I have always heard the term ‘larger than life’ (usually used to describe characters undeservedly) used and I never really understood what it meant till now; and that’s exactly what you are – a true larger than life character. You are truly beautiful and I’m so happy and grateful that I read your story today.

      God Bless You

    • ATL's finest

      August 23, 2015 at 6:34 am

      Whaoko! God didn’t bring U to it, but he saw you through it. I don’t know nor have I seeing your movies but I will be watching brave. In my Oprah’s voice , those last words was the “Ahan” moment for me. God bless U.

  2. Hephzibah

    August 20, 2015 at 1:49 pm

    The Lord who has taken you this far with the love and support of your loved,will complete his greater purpose in you,I am truly inspired and I celebrate with you.stay blessed and keep being beautiful

  3. Scarred too

    August 20, 2015 at 1:50 pm

    Also wanted to let you Know that whenever people that love you have these bad dreams, have a prayer on your lips. They are Sometimes messages from one who loves you more!

  4. busola

    August 20, 2015 at 1:50 pm

    Wow!!!! Very inspiring story Dolapo. i am 40 and haven’t achieved half of what you have . You just inspired me to move on , no matter the obstacle. You know what? You are special and beautiful too ( and i mean that literally) . Thanks for sharing your ordeal with us.

  5. lola

    August 20, 2015 at 1:50 pm

    awww dolapo, I remember vividly the day you were crying in the toilet, it feels just like yesterday. receive grace darling to take your career to greater heights. lots of love

    • som

      August 20, 2015 at 2:45 pm

      awwwwww. your comment is so kind. Thank you for been there for the author. May God always send us support when we need it.
      Some of us don’t have physical scars but emotional ones. It takes God’s Grace and help from beautiful souls to get by.

  6. Nene

    August 20, 2015 at 1:52 pm

    Thank you.Very inspiring

  7. Noms

    August 20, 2015 at 1:54 pm

    …couldn’t hold back the tears.
    I celebrate and thank God with you.
    Being alive is something I have learnt to be grateful for not withstanding ones achievement.
    Like my Papa preached yesterday, we all have one “BUT” or the other but these “BUT” brings out the best in us and drawers us closer /defines our destinies.
    Continue to soar…..

  8. Nky

    August 20, 2015 at 1:56 pm

    Thank you Dolapo, God used you to speak to me. Thank God for your keep. Keep being positive and keep living your dream. God will strengthen you at all times Amen

  9. Zika

    August 20, 2015 at 1:57 pm

    Awww your story is so inspiring Dolapo. You are a fighter. May God bless you and help you reach the peak of your career. … Xoxo

  10. amy

    August 20, 2015 at 1:57 pm

    omg all i can think of right now is you trived through all these things and came grateful. God would see you through all your endeavors. he had a reason for keeping you and that impact shall be seen in the lives of many. men shall call you blessed. generations to come shall also call you blessed. God be with you hon.

  11. Ozi

    August 20, 2015 at 1:59 pm

    God bless you Dolapo. You are indeed an inspirational and beautiful young lady with a bright future. I have seen ‘Brave’ and ‘A place called happy’ and I must say that you are very talented for someone so young. Keep growing, keep learning, keeping aiming high and remain favoured. x

  12. jummai

    August 20, 2015 at 2:03 pm

    Cant believe I was teary while reading this piece, lord I thank you, there are so many things to be thankful for.

  13. BB

    August 20, 2015 at 2:04 pm

    IT IS WELL WITH YOU. MAY YOUR STRENGTH CONTINUE TO GROW AS YOU GROW. IT WILL BE ALRIGHT.

  14. Osagie

    August 20, 2015 at 2:05 pm

    “We cannot afford to live life on our knees. We must FIGHT and WIN on our feet”. This was the last straw that broke my fears in pieces. Thank you for sharing. You inspire.

  15. ecneica

    August 20, 2015 at 2:06 pm

    THESE ARE WORDS THAT PENETRATE DEEP INTO MY SOUL .YOU ARE HIGHLY CELEBRATED.

  16. Seyitan

    August 20, 2015 at 2:08 pm

    Very inspiring! No one is defeated until he has accepted he’s a loser from within himself. You win life’s battle with your inner might, not with your physical muscle. Thanks for not giving up on God first, your self and your purpose.

  17. Tunmi

    August 20, 2015 at 2:12 pm

    I really do hope seatbelts and airbags are mandatory in cars, and are enforced strictly.

  18. Bee

    August 20, 2015 at 2:13 pm

    Wow, your spirit is amazing. Thank God for your life. Thank you for sharing your story.

  19. Jhennique

    August 20, 2015 at 2:16 pm

    Truly inpiring story. What doesnt kill you makes you stronger. Kudos darling!

  20. Oyindee

    August 20, 2015 at 2:22 pm

    Thank you so much Dolapo for sharing your story,its really inspiring,thank you for accepting the things that you couldn’t change and making a positive impact,this really hit home for me because i also have a scar on my forehead and i have also accepted it and become confident except those times when someone just walks up to me and asks me ‘what happened to you here’,SMH,God bless you Dolapo

  21. koffie

    August 20, 2015 at 2:29 pm

    Wow, thank God you had a great support system. Thank you for sharing your story and you are beautiful. Your gratefulness to God in spite of it all is something to learn from.

  22. O~Intuition!

    August 20, 2015 at 2:30 pm

    I-N-S-P-I-R-I-N-G!

  23. Lisa

    August 20, 2015 at 2:30 pm

    God bless you.. We never really understand what pain really is, except you live through it literally! And the truth is, the will power to stay strong has to come from you. The one it hurt the most.. You stayed strong and had faith that someday it will all be fine in the end. That’s truly admirable! Against all odds.. May God give you the grace to stay strong and be WHOEVER you want to be, because you are more than ENOUGH!

  24. Funmilola

    August 20, 2015 at 2:31 pm

    God bless your soul dear… thank God for where you are now!

  25. ChiChiChilolo

    August 20, 2015 at 2:31 pm

    One way or the other a whole lot of us have gone through turmoils in life and we all have stories to tell. It is well with our souls.*singing in my heart* Grace and mercy by Mississippi Mass Choir. It’s just grace and mercy of God that has kept you till this moment. You were right at the edge of it but you kept on. Weldone dear. The Lord continue to keep and strengthen you Dola.

  26. bee

    August 20, 2015 at 2:32 pm

    dollie pppppp…..my secondary school friend and room mate of destiny… what a good soul…as course mates i can remember the stares you got, how people asked ‘how does she look without the fringe, was she really a fine girl before the accident, how did it happen’? because i was her room mate….. lowladee and her movie making, e blog writing and disturbance ‘always had fans flocking around her’ and we had to act movies/ pose for cameras!!!!. it was unbelievable when i saw you first with the scars–, this was the girl that won ‘cutest girl’ in our set back in secondary school. I believe God has a purpose for this, He used this as a blessing for you baby and I am indeed proud of you dolapo ‘miss rice and beans!!!!’, God bless you and make you great.

    Thank God for boo (heheehe…remember how he asked you out). we shall be there for the wedding!!!!. i pray you heal in all areas In Jesus Name. The, truth is ‘ scars may take time to fade but they do not last forever…. they eventually fade away’.
    Cheers to more awards, recognitions, great life and good family ahead!!!!!!. and hope the dream of the NGO has not died cos the you are just about to take the world by storm. Love you girl..bee

  27. scars

    August 20, 2015 at 2:36 pm

    I’m crazy in love with someone and he has scars on his face. I love HIM.

  28. Hamdalat

    August 20, 2015 at 2:42 pm

    Beautiful and inspiring! you represent all that is strong in human kind. May your joy be everlasting. Ameen.

  29. kathyesan

    August 20, 2015 at 2:45 pm

    Very inspiring. Please can I get her email address.thank you.

  30. simisola

    August 20, 2015 at 2:53 pm

    woo,Great Grace to you Dolapo;you are such an inspiration.We have all at one time in life passed through one issue or the other but God is able even at the last minute to save us.just as you said ,you are a work in progress,God will heal you completely.He is our help in times of sorrow/trouble.Awesome you.

  31. deji

    August 20, 2015 at 2:55 pm

    Thank God for you,God always provides a way out no matter the situation. He will never allow us face things beyond what we can handle.

  32. Fifi

    August 20, 2015 at 3:03 pm

    This testimonies just make me take a moment to thank God and tell him how truly grateful i am, this week has been a very difficult for me but in all i give Thanks

  33. Temmy

    August 20, 2015 at 3:09 pm

    Bless God working in you and through you. I celebrate you DOLAPO.

  34. Layo

    August 20, 2015 at 3:12 pm

    This is such a beautiful story, I remember seeing her in school(CU) all the time, even when i was still in Faith Academy, you never missed a visiting day to see your sis then. always thought you yo be beautiful and you still are. I’m so happy to read this and to know that you’re doing so well. God bless you.

  35. D

    August 20, 2015 at 3:15 pm

    My story. Except that mine is barely two years now and can’t be covered with a fringe because it almost took the right eye and seriously scarred my face. Now I greet people and quickly add my name becos no one recognizes me. And make-up just makes me look worse so I don’t bother. Thank you for your story. I look forward to seeing my face look better in 8 years. Time also heals. God be with you.

    • Buchi

      August 20, 2015 at 3:29 pm

      Time heals many things and those it can’t heal, it makes more palatable. I pray that you will not have to wait 8 years and that your own story becomes a source of strength for others.

      In the meantime, I hope life is kind to you and that you have the support you need. God bless.

    • Noms

      August 20, 2015 at 4:16 pm

      Dear D, I pray for God to give you all the support you need and do the miraculous in your case. May HE grant you speedy recovery that will marvel all that has ever seen you.
      Expecting you to share your testimony with the BN family soon.
      Stay blessed.

    • Californiabawlar

      August 20, 2015 at 4:44 pm

      I pray for grace that you receive the mental strength to pull through. It is more a battle of the mind than anything else. Because of the whole people not recognizing thing, I just packed my kaya, moved away and so then every time I introduced myself, it was because I had to, not because people were ACTING like they can’t recognize me.
      I will say this though. It will get better! Sometimes I’m not sure if my face is better or my eyes have adjusted to it…’cause the way I stay feeling myself in the mirror these days no get part two! lols! chin up girlie…you’ll be fine.
      Sending hugs and prayers your way!! xoxo

    • yetunde

      August 21, 2015 at 8:34 am

      So Sorry D,u would be better in time, have faith…

    • yetunde

      August 21, 2015 at 8:37 am

      So Sorry D,u would be better with time, have faith…

  36. Adaeze Writes

    August 20, 2015 at 3:15 pm

    This is so inspiring. Keep being you and the sky is just your start-up! God bless you…

  37. the generous economist

    August 20, 2015 at 3:16 pm

    Dear Dolapo..I praise God for your life…such a brave and inspiring young lady..I rmbr d first time I met u in 100l…”ur childhood best friend” introduced us and when u left the room, she told us the story of how you had the accident..to be honest..that story defined my resolve to become a person defined not just by beauty, but by other traits such as mental strengths and achievements, seeing how life can change in a moment. Funny how I was discussing with other CU ppl yst, with the whole PKB’s issue on our mind, reflecting…and discussing relationships..I brought up your story to underscore how transient life can be…and how its so important to marry someone that is in love with your spirit, and not just the physical.. to see this article here..just elevates my spirit..wish you nothing but the best..see you at greater heights!!!

  38. Las

    August 20, 2015 at 3:20 pm

    What an amazing story! Your light really shines through, you are a truly beautiful person, inside and out.

  39. DIVAH

    August 20, 2015 at 3:22 pm

    when ever she is down, she should think about it this way: Millions have lost their legs, arms, eyes, major body part and millions die to car accident..but she escaped all these and is left with just a scar or two..that means God as a purpose for you on earth.

    That u are alive to tell the tale and make something good of your life is all that matters and all that you need to keep you going. Wish u the best FYI: don’t mind those doctors jare..it will take a few years but it will heal..and if u work harder u can afford to go to the states with better medical option. but it not necessary. learn to love your self the way u her and life will be brighter and better. Goodluck.

  40. Chu-chu

    August 20, 2015 at 3:33 pm

    Reminds me so much of myself too, i got burnt almost ten years ago by boiling hot oil, thank God, it poured on my laps and not my tummy or face. Despite being dark, i am so conscious of my ugly scars, that have deprived me, from wearing cute skirts and shorts. i had this male friend, who always used to tell me, my bride price has reduced because of the scars. i sometimes wonder what ppl tink, when they see them. i feel less beautiful, even though this humongous scar is on my laps. Its hard some days, but hey, am grateful to God, that i can atleast wear trousers and feel sexy.

    • Brown

      August 21, 2015 at 10:31 am

      Dear chu-chu, Ur bride prie has not reduced o dont mind d hediot fellow saying mean things even though probably not with a mean intent. You are beautiful and its not even your face luckily.

      this may not be same as urs but I started having stretchmarks as at when i was around 12 or maybe younger..ive had them all my life as far as i could remember and i hated them. ive had boys tell me they couldnt date a girl with stretch marks..my first bf in d uni told me he was managing to cos usually he hates stretchmarks..actually most of d low lifes i dated said the same…they were allova my laps mehn. my mum got me products non end and nothing worked…some will even pepper my precious skin and i will take it in and nothing worked..ill never forget that particlar pepperish product..i could never wear short dresses and cute stuff and everyone in secondary school made jest of me(my skirt in senior school was big ehn). of course it killed my self esteem, plus all d abuse i went thru..but i pulled thru and still pulling..i lost so much weight people didnt understand why and i prayed and prayed for them to go..they actually reduced!! but yea still there.. my sister said they have reduced but u will hardly catch me wearing a short trouser and when i have to wear shirts(not bum short) to d beach, i will always make sure not to walk around too much..i wear short dresses and skirts tho as they are distracting..no i never swim, cos i cant wear bikini when others are.. my ex calls me “tiger skin” very fondly.. he adores my stretch marks..weird huh? but well had to dump him cos he’s AS and i am.

      like i said this isnt huge deal compared to urs,its a psychologicala thing. i even landed one abusive bofriend then cos i believed i was ugly. believe you are beautiful and u really are.. dont let bad stuff happen to u because you dont believe in urself..nigeria sucks as it is, dont let some people come into ur space and make u feel less than u really are! stay blessed boo! And know what workes for u, Dolapo can’t do center part hairstyle and she doesnt mind..u cant wear short dress too so that’s not the end of life..

  41. IfyNath

    August 20, 2015 at 3:40 pm

    God bless your soul Dolapo and we thank God and share your joy with you on this day. remain Blessed!!!!

  42. Godsangel

    August 20, 2015 at 3:40 pm

    Touching story….mine is just like yours but I was much younger @ age 4, crossing the road and the car hit…everyone thought I wouldn’t survive but God has a purpose…There is a big car on my left leg, you cant catch me out on shorts or skirts always on pants and jean…if I send a pix u will call me omalicha a beauty to behold but sometimes I still am self conscious…Our scars do not define us be comfortable with urself and others will have no choice than to follow suit. More grace dolapo and to others out there…God blessings

  43. D

    August 20, 2015 at 3:49 pm

    Thank you Buchi.

  44. D

    August 20, 2015 at 3:55 pm

    Thank you Buchi. God bless you.

  45. lesley

    August 20, 2015 at 4:08 pm

    So touching but am sure God has a purpose to allow/permit things to happen.

  46. vivi

    August 20, 2015 at 4:09 pm

    This is so touching and encouraging.

  47. Lady L

    August 20, 2015 at 4:12 pm

    You are a star dear….God bless you for sharing…

  48. oladipo

    August 20, 2015 at 4:12 pm

    So emotional

  49. anthony

    August 20, 2015 at 4:14 pm

    I actually was at the point of tears when I read through cos it reminded me of my own eventful past that till today I cringe at the thought. My dear ur story has inspired me more to keep fighting. I have used this to my advantage in a very positive way that even without knowing my past has become more inspirational than regrettable. I will surely meet you soonest then I will give u first hand info on what I too I have been through. Keep it up thank you so much u have inspired me the more with this story

    • Oluwadarasimi

      August 27, 2015 at 4:25 pm

      Dolapo, we see u have gone through a way without giving up, thank God for your life. your story is a motivation to others who are in difficulty, AM LOOKING FORWARD TO SEE YOU

  50. Californiabawlar

    August 20, 2015 at 4:19 pm

    wow!! I now fully believe when they say no human experience is totally unique to one person!
    I was 2o, my mum had only recently called me into her room to ask what my beauty regimen was, because over the last couple of years I had just blossomed into this beautiful girl with flawless glowing skin….and like Dolapo, I had never felt that beautiful in my life! There was something about that compliment from my mum. Strangers would stop me on the road and like, this girl you’re fine o. Someone genuinely thought I was in Nollywood one time! haha!

    Then, it all went down, by the time I was 22 I couldn’t recognize myself in the mirror. I also remember the feeling of hopelessness when I went to a world renowned doctor and he told me the same thing about my scars. I had built up so much hope….this was going to be it! my troubles were finally going to be over. All for him to tell me to go and invest in makeup. Mehn, when the appointment was over, I locked myself in his restroom for almost 30mins bawling my eyes out. My mum was so scared, she joined me in the wailing sef. I believe that was the 2nd and last time till date I think I had ever seen her show genuine empathy for me….cos she cray on a good day, haha!
    The inner scars! hmmmn!! The depression and anger! At some point I covered all the mirrors in my room and stayed in there for most of my waking part of the day. Then when I overcame that one, I had to deal with friends and strangers alike ACCOSTING me and demanding to know what happened to me. Chai!! Nigerians can be so rude!! hmmmn…All I can say is that I am grateful for my sanity today.

    I lost almost 2years of my life just sitting in the house for a week at a stretch, or traveling outside the country for months at a time, anything to avoid folks that knew me before the scarring…. Then one day October 2008 I decided I was done with it all, made plans and within 6 months I permanently moved away from home, and started building my career.

    The only thing I walked away from that Jewish doctor with were his words of wisdom… an old Jewish saying: THE PERFECT IS THE ENEMY OF THE BEAUTIFUL. He said if I sought perfection via invasive procedures and surgeries I would end up like Michael Jackson….lol (he wasn’t joking o).
    I took me a while to see that though I may not be perfect, I am beautiful. In fact looking at your pictures reinforces my thoughts about myself. I see a beautiful girl!
    My dear, I seek perfection in my spirituality, my career, and in loving those in my life…those are worthier causes than a perfect skin anyways…lol. My mum keeps bringing up a skin graft…that new technologies have come around since the last 8years…I’m like nah ma! I’m good 🙂
    And about your fringe, sweetheart…rock ya thing!! You looks good 😀 For me, I plaster my face with makeup and wear scarves if I feel like…and people are always commenting on both my makeup skills and how I always have beautiful scarves. In my mind, I’m like una no sabi say necessity is the mother of invention….hehehe.
    Anyways, this my story don long pass the post o. It’s been a while I walked down this lane, tears are starting to well up in my eyes sef, abeg thugs don’t cry, so Imma stop here :P.
    My dear, I wish you continued success, love and peace!

    • Concerned_Boyfriend

      August 20, 2015 at 5:57 pm

      Wow!..You are one strong spirit!. God will continue to strengthen you!..

    • scarred too

      August 20, 2015 at 6:52 pm

      My dear Californiabawler and Lowladee: For us scarred girls, I think God has a purpose. Like Californiabawler, I was a very beautiful child in the eyes of others. I STUNNED and people would stare at me. I knew from a very young age that I was very pretty because of the reactions I would get from adults and others. THen I had my accident in 2nd grade and my legs were transformed. This is what it did for me and I have only come to learn this in retrospect. Despite being scarred, you had to come close to me to see the scars on my calves. I started getting TOO MUCH male attention by age 13. Cars would literally stop if I went outside our gates. I had old men, young men, all sorts. It was that stunning facial beauty. But then, the minute they looked to my knees, you would see the change in demeanor and stance. They would find an out. IT SAVED ME. I dont know what would have happened to me as a female with all that attention if GOd had not allowed a minor flaw to send them running. I was FLAWLESS before the accident. He allowed a small flaw compared to what else could have happened. But it was enough to keep “danger” away. At a point, I started using it to drive men away. I would sit and cross my legs at a party so that they would see the scars from the knees down first and not even talk to me. some still persisted but it mostly worked. Many of the vain guys you see would not come near me with a 10 foot pole. When I did date, they loved me with a scary and extremely jealous passion that made me wonder what would have happened if I had not even been scarred. THink about it, a man would have to think really hard and be really obsessed to be willing to call a scarred one his girl. My ex boyfriends and current hubby never hid me. THey actually flaunted/flaunt me. They are all very handsome men too.
      My sisters, we never know why things happen. But I believe that mine happened because it was needed to allow me fulfill my destiny without the devil interrupting through male-female things. I have also found out that when I step into a boardroom and I want sympathy, I leave my calves bare. It tames the wild ones who thinks all females get to the top with their faces. It makes people appreciate the fact that in a society so vain, there is at least one woman who is not using her perfection as a tool for success.

      Stand tall sisters! We should do an untouched scarred photoshoot.

    • zayn

      August 21, 2015 at 8:14 am

      i usually read your comments and you always come across as a lovable and joyful person, i am glad you didn’t let your physical look deter you from living life,you and the writer have inspired me so much.

  51. Raddy

    August 20, 2015 at 4:22 pm

    My senior in Dansol… so glad you are doing great. The news of your accident went round and we all prayed for you. Thank God. We are Daniels.. we shall always be at the top. Keep standing out. Please I want to act or send you a story. How do I contact you. #lemmefamz.

  52. Blue

    August 20, 2015 at 4:23 pm

    Waooo! so inspiring……

  53. tanah

    August 20, 2015 at 4:30 pm

    This is indeed inspiring….

  54. ij

    August 20, 2015 at 4:40 pm

    and i have the gall to keep complaining about acne scars , honestly i need to get over myself

  55. ayo Dawodu

    August 20, 2015 at 4:43 pm

    Hey Dolapo,
    Bless sweet Jesus for your life. I celebrate you.
    Looking forward to hearing your stories about being a globally successful film maker. Cheers!

  56. Promise Nwaubani Chima

    August 20, 2015 at 4:46 pm

    Dolapo, glad to have met and worked with you. I love the passion you put into your work and I know you will continue to make other young ladies discover their inner passion. Miss you and the girls (Bisola & Zainab)

  57. yonce

    August 20, 2015 at 4:54 pm

    You are beautiful!

  58. Prince Okubanjo

    August 20, 2015 at 5:05 pm

    This is a true life example of when there is life, there is still hope, it all depends on how hard we are willing to fight back…God will continue to make you stronger dear…

  59. T

    August 20, 2015 at 5:16 pm

    I thank God for your life Dolapo, He who has started a good work in you will perfect it in Jesus name. May God always bring the best people around us when we need them the most. Amen

  60. Anonymous

    August 20, 2015 at 5:40 pm

    Dolapo your story is deeply inspiring,i pray that GOD Almighty in his infinite mercies would heal you completely and you would always have alot of things to rejoice over. I have learnt alot from your story and i beleieve you would inspire alot of people that are going through similar situation like yours. k.a

  61. Vivi gurl

    August 20, 2015 at 5:50 pm

    so inspiring!

  62. Concerned_Boyfriend

    August 20, 2015 at 5:50 pm

    “…in your pain, you find purpose”. This resonates with me. Your testimony has really encouraged me and made me thankful for the gift of life and health. So many of us take what we have for granted. We worry over trivial things like how our hair look or how our eye brows looks on selfies. You have purpose in life and I’m not even sure that has been fulfilled yet. The One that preserved your life from that accident has a lot in store for you. He’s taking you on a journey, be calm and watch his plan unfold in your life.

    I don’t know why I’m writing these prophetic words …I’m just a vessel .. God bless you.

  63. simisola

    August 20, 2015 at 5:57 pm

    Dolapo, this is really inspiring! I thank God for your life and an glad you had the courage and strong will to pull through. This is indeed an encouragement to someone almost giving up. God bless U and keep soaring like an eagle.

  64. Ba

    August 20, 2015 at 6:18 pm

    Your words are mind touchy. Just continue to be lowladee. You’re distinct and can never be someone else.

  65. Fix it

    August 20, 2015 at 6:23 pm

    Very inspiring. The mind is a powerful thing! We can heal from our scars if we take the first step of faith. You are a very beautiful lady, I see no scars only beauty and strength!

  66. Abiola

    August 20, 2015 at 7:10 pm

    May God always guide nd b wit u dear, nd I tnk God for ur life , remain blessed

  67. Dr. N

    August 20, 2015 at 8:38 pm

    No wonder Brave was so good. U need to pass thru to take others there. I’ll be on d lookout for more of your work and if I ever had to produce a movie, u would be my girl. Just cause u know what’s up.
    Big hugs.
    PS, u have lovely eyes

  68. Oluseyi Adebiyi

    August 20, 2015 at 9:06 pm

    Read through this with mixed feelings. Remember the shock I felt when I heard of the accident and the palpable silence I saw in the hospital ward on that fateful day. Thank God for how the journey has turned out and the great things that have come forth afterwards. It only gets better Dolapo, you’ll always be a Gem in God’s hands.

  69. Tsarah!

    August 20, 2015 at 9:07 pm

    Dolapo you’re still as beautiful as I can remember in Dansol, scars or not.
    Very soft spoken and nice! Well done gorgeous woman! Super proud of the super star you’re becoming and I’m assured this is just the beginning! Keep being the ‘Daniel’you’ve always been! (Dansol people will get the Daniel metaphor?)

  70. concerned9ja

    August 20, 2015 at 10:05 pm

    Scars…..a reminder that we just made of flesh and blood…..I also have scarring…freak accident ran into a stationery car at 14…sliced through my right thigh… first time I ever saw clean white flesh….my mum almost passed out…probably saved my life… people see me now and say i’m very reserved…at 14 I was just too hyper…
    Thank God for your life Dolapo and others going through something similar…and please prayers do work and should be acknowledged!!

  71. temi

    August 20, 2015 at 10:31 pm

    It. Is well with you hunnybunch…still looking beautiful

  72. sisi-Anu

    August 20, 2015 at 11:26 pm

    DEEE!!! Happy I know you”’ BTW il continue to say it you are beautiful

  73. BeeIbine

    August 20, 2015 at 11:26 pm

    DollyP,
    When the accident happened, I never saw u until u resumed school, I just heard in church from Kenny, Sanya and co. As far as I was andd am concerned, u were and are still beautiful.
    I love you hun, and am proud of who you are, and I agree with Mai Atafo, so Weneva u r comfortable with it, take the picture. Excel hun, the sky is your limit

  74. Toni

    August 21, 2015 at 2:00 am

    Dolapo dear, even though I have never mentioned it your story makes me grateful for all I have and don’t have and know with God there are no impossibilities. God has great plans for you.

  75. Olanrewaju Salu

    August 21, 2015 at 6:26 am

    Dolapo. Always an inspiration. God bless your beautiful heart.

  76. AliuGee

    August 21, 2015 at 8:06 am

    I am so proud of how strong you are. God bless you Dolapo. Your triumph story is just starting in Jesus name, Amen

  77. yetunde

    August 21, 2015 at 8:28 am

    Wow! Dolapo, your story gave me goose bumps,but yet its very inspiring….keep up the good work.

  78. Seun Tuyo

    August 21, 2015 at 10:39 am

    Lowladee,

    I do not know you personally but i have seen your movies. And i appreciate your work a great deal. I have seen a few pictures of you, and all the time i saw a beautiful woman who is filled with energy and seemed to enjoy what she does.

    Scars go beyond the physical marks on our skin. We are all scarred if we look within. Our scars tell a story of how far we have come and yet, we survived. We define our scars!

    I had a terrible burn as a young child, i have marks from my face (thanks to make up we can hide this nicely), my arms, my chest, stomach area, all the way to my thighs. I cannot even begin to imagine what my skin will be without them. Yes, I have lived that long with them. Growing up, we named each scar a map of somewhere, and laughed so hard when the shape looked funny. Some have faded over the years though. My mom was elated when i started to develop breasts, because the doctor was skeptical at the time. I learnt not to let the scars define me, instead i defined them. I have grown from been overly conservative trying to hide them to joyfully showing them off appropriately.

    I salute your courage, a step at a time and i hope one day you will give up the fringe. 🙂

  79. Beehorlah

    August 21, 2015 at 10:52 am

    Such an inspiring story…..If you can take time out to share this, you are healed cos this is the best healing one could ever have… More of God’s grace to carry on.

  80. Lucy

    August 21, 2015 at 10:52 am

    This story is so touching and inspiring. I’m glad u shared your story, I’m sure a lot of people out there with the same issue will learn to appreciate their lives. Thank you and God bless you.

  81. aaewhy

    August 21, 2015 at 11:13 am

    Wow such an inspiring story, you are indeed brave, remember you back in dansol you were and are still so beautiful and so soft spoken, you were my cousins friend and i’ll leave my class back in js1 to come and famz you guys, didn’t hear much since I left dansol js2 but I thank God for your journey . He who has kept you till this day shall continue to uphold you and fufill all your heat desires.

  82. Osii

    August 21, 2015 at 11:13 am

    You are one beautiful person Dolapo (inside and out) that much I know. You are young but continue to inspire and impact many with your life and work, myself included. You are easily the most hardworking lady I know. God continue to bless you dearie, You are a STAR.

  83. Tkum

    August 21, 2015 at 11:51 am

    “Those who truly call the shots are behind the Camera”-Mai Atafo(2012) to Dolapo Adeleke.

    Dolapo you are blessed… Your Greatness is Undisputed…You are beautiful,very beautiful and i mean every word of mine… for years since my childhood i v been going through storms of life that have left me scarred…Friends, society and even worst off My own Family…even right now, today i received a huge scar of life from a loved one… but alas, my spirit is filled with Joy because i know all that is happening today is working for my own good… for surely and indeed every disappointment is a blessing in disguise for me.

    IN THE MIDST OF MY PAINS, HURTS, TEARS, This week i was promoted from a Customer Service Executive to a CORPORATE SERVICES MANAGER…with just my B.Sc oo… no other certification. Yes i work with an Oil and Gas firm…

    Thank you for this share Dolapo…Yes i am hopeful becos the best is surely nigh, already @ my door…

    Dearie, I BLESS GOD ON YOUR BEHALF…yes u are experiencing what it really means for God to clothe one with beauty for ashes… Take care Doll.

  84. binam

    August 21, 2015 at 12:13 pm

    I barely knew u in CU, But I remember thinking whatever her story, she’s beautiful and brave. I was recently in an accident that affected parts of my face (and body) too n I remember d stares, hating myself, hating d world n being depressed. What really inspires me is that you took charge of your life. Although d scars on my face are almost non-existent and people don’t even believe anyfin happened to me until they see pictures, the incident still torments me. Work is hell and sometimes I lose myself to depression and I can barely get myself to sing or write songs like I used to. I’m tired of people telling me to pray that someone’s after my life/success because all I know how to do now is live in fear. I took some notes down though from this piece and I do feel like a lot’s going to change forthwith. So, thanks a lot. Dolapo.

  85. Nike

    August 21, 2015 at 2:18 pm

    Wow wow, you are such an inspiration, so young and full of wisdom and look what God birthed out of what the enemy meant for evil, I’m so proud of you and how far you’ve come and how far you will go, I’m so encouraged, my worries pale in comparison, God is truly awesome, He’s a restorer and a rewarder, God bless you dear girl, fringe or no fringe, scar or no scar, you are one stunning girl and God was determined to keep you here, he had to, I needed to read this today. Keep your head up and God bless that remarkable man that’s making your heart glad.

  86. Girlbeingreal

    August 21, 2015 at 7:17 pm

    Your story is touching and inspiring. Best luck to you

  87. Dayo Success

    August 21, 2015 at 11:21 pm

    This lady here alongside a few others inspired me to start 9Jaheadlines when i was into blogging cos loved reading articles from her and some other peeps…would open her articles on different tabs …..that gave me the idea for news curation (newz aggregation) stopped now though. Please beg her to continue lowladee.com it helped so many peeps. Love her fringe or gorimapa

  88. Logical

    August 22, 2015 at 9:41 pm

    I used to see you in school back then, and always wondered what your story was. It’s nice to find out in the most inspiring way. whenever I pass by you then, I envied you because your open scars give you an opportunity to establish genuine friendship. People fall in love with your scars before they fall in love with your personality, which in my opinion is more important. I have scars but they can be covered by clothes so a lot of times I shut people out because I fear that my scar is a weakness and people must not know about it. So it makes me wonder if people that claim to like me would still do if they found out about these scars? I still struggle with this but one thing I know is it gets better with each passing day.
    I pray that God continually gives you the courage to follow your dreams to dissipate courage to others.
    Btw, a place called happy is one of my favorite movies.

  89. Uzo

    August 22, 2015 at 9:45 pm

    I love you too Lowladee!

  90. @vivanaija IG

    August 24, 2015 at 12:28 am

    i have seen ‘brave’, and i loved it, but reading your story, the short film speaks to me in a new way. Sister, your life is a miracle, and the sky is only your beginning, i don’t know you personally, but I’m excited to see your future achievements, I know you will make power contributions in the Nigeria film/entertainment industry.

  91. Ekua

    August 24, 2015 at 12:30 am

    God bless you Dolapo and congratulations on your achievements. Truly, it is and shall be well with you

  92. Abidemi Elibokun

    August 25, 2015 at 9:22 pm

    Dolapo u writing this makes that day come back to me I can remember rushing out of the house on hearing your name being shouted by people outside and putting a wrapper round your face as if wanting to save all the blood rushing .God bless you love u hv indeed come a long way ,am indeed proud of who u have become ?

  93. Kay

    August 26, 2015 at 11:06 pm

    You’re a star, a strong and beautiful star. GOD Bless you Dolapo

  94. Dammy

    August 29, 2015 at 8:42 am

    I remember in dansol when we heard the news and everyone wondered what will happen and mrs Akinyemiju told us to pray. I am so happy to read this, thank God for being faithful. He has only just started this good work in you. Soar like the eagle.

  95. Gbemi

    August 29, 2015 at 9:02 am

    Dolapo Adeleke I am grateful to God that this is how this is turning out. I recall that day at the hospital. I bless God for your dad and mum and their unusual faith in the midst of pain. I celebrate your resilient and fighting spirit in the midst of pain. He who began a good work in you will certainly complete it. You were born to change your world. Keep on keeping on.

  96. Anonymous

    September 24, 2015 at 7:38 pm

    Dolapo! thankful for life and strength on your behalf. This was incredibly inspiring for me. Two things that caught my attention initially, this remarkable date/ day for you happens to be my birthday and we both attended the same university. As i read on, i then realised there was more- someone else actually understands what it is to be in pains! both physically and emotionally! been in non stop pain for almost 5 years now and people around me try to understand how i feel but they really do not because i can not really express how intense the pain of a bad spine has been. Your story/ words of encouragement have been helpful as you fought and won in the end. I hope and pray to win my battle in the end too. God bless and continually strengthen you Dolapo.

  97. ema

    October 25, 2015 at 10:33 pm

    Too inspiring…I she’d so much tears reading this…God bless you Dolyppp….You’re a. star.

  98. Tolu

    December 22, 2015 at 8:19 am

    Inspiring Dolapo,,,and congrats for the wonderful works you are doing.
    The caption of the article with your name led me to read, understand and totally solved my prolong questions which i wsnt able to ask you during this period 2011-2012 we experienced together. I can’t but feel shocked and “bow hat” for ur strong spirit that never gave up. Really, am short of words, i ll caught up with U.. All the best from God and. Cheers to more glorious future!!

  99. Titolu

    June 2, 2016 at 3:02 pm

    Dear Dolapo, God bless you.
    Now I see why the film ‘BRAVE’ moves me to tears every time I see it. Because you’ve bravely been through it all yourself.
    Thanks for sharing your story, So many people are now liberated because of this.
    I believe I also will be brave enough to share my story someday soon!

  100. janjala

    June 29, 2017 at 9:32 am

    I think this is where you let your personality do the talking and try to shake off the face (i know its not easy and u may say ‘she dosent even understand’). Come to think of it, you’ll definitely take people by surprise; a niiiiicccee surprise……..rooting for you from here (wink)

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