HaroldWrites: Life Lessons on Love & Choice From Tyler Perry’s Movie ‘Acrimony’

I saw Tyler Perry’s latest movie, “Acrimony” recently and by the time the movie was done, I did not realize I was still on my seat for another five minutes. What was I waiting for? A post credit scene (no thanks to Marvel Cinematic Universe for teaching me how to be patient after a movie is done). What did I expect from Acrimony’s post credit scene? An assurance from Tyler that, what I had just witnessed was purely fiction, and not based on true events. Of course, that assurance never came; it did not need to. I was already convinced that, I had seen this movie before. In real life. Typical Tyler. He takes you on an emotional rollercoaster through his movies, exposing to you to things that give you a sense of déjà vu.

The thing about Tyler’s movies is that, you can always relate to either the plot, a character’s struggle, a dialogue or a theme in the movie. You sit through his movies, thinking to yourself, “this is real life on screen. This is me. Or my friend. Or my family. Or my next door neighbour.” Acrimony is no different.

Acrimony is the story of a young couple who went through thick and thin in pursuit of the male partner’s lifelong dream. The young and naive woman in the relationship made difficult and painful sacrifices for her man, despite the warnings of her family. She made her sacrifices out of love, belief and unshakable resolve. All she ever wanted was to see her man happy and successful. Her man, on his part, seemed like all she thought he was. He had drive, focus and determination. And he appeared to love her in the same measure.

Until it became clear that, everything was not the way it seemed.

And then came rage, hatred, pain, regret, violence, revenge.

One question I kept asking myself after seeing the movie was, was the woman, Melinda wrong in reacting the way she did after her painful split from her husband, Robert? I mean, this woman practically staked her life and dreams for her husband’s. She was ostracized by her family for sticking with him. After eighteen fruitless years of waiting and hoping and wishing that everything would be fine, she finally reached her breaking point. She had given and given and given and she could not give anymore. Not because she did not want to, but because she could not afford to. She literally had nothing left to give. No money, no motivation, no energy, no love. And what did she get from her husband in those eighteen years of giving? Anguish. Despair. False hope. Pain. Heartbreak.

But then, how much responsible was Robert for all the troubles Melinda had to go through? Was Robert responsible for any of Melinda’s woes at all? Or was he simply misunderstood? Was Melinda a nutcase?

Acrimony got me reflecting on life, love and choices. Hereunder are the top ten lessons I learnt from the movie:

1.    Sieve what advice you adhere to, even if it’s genuine & comes from people who love you dearly. Not every good advice is good advice.

2.    The best people to consult when you want to resolve a conflict in your relationship are yourself & your partner. No  one knows your relationship better than both of you.

3.    Love unconditionally but love with reason.

4.   Two perfect people may not be perfect together.

5.   Anger is a choice. And it is never a good one.

6.   When you are angry, the best thing to do is nothing. Don’t even think. Just let the anger subside.

7.   Social media does not need to know everything that happens in your relationship. Don’t hide the fact that you’re in a relationship, but as much as possible, keep the things that happen therein, private.

8.   Learn your partner’s love language, else, you’ll labour in vain to provide acts of service and gifting gifts when your partner only understands words of affirmation and quality time. This could put so much strain on your relationship.

9.   Swallow your pride and make amends as soon as possible, irrespective of who is wrong. There is no medal for “Best Partner Who Can Stay Angry For the Longest Time.”

10.   Trust, once broken, can never be regained.

Have you seen the movie? What did you make of it? Do you agree with the foregoing lessons? Add yours in the comment section.

Photo Credit: Dreamstime