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Awkward Places

Glory Edozien

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Have you ever had to look for a dead rat? The smell from the decaying creature saturates the air like a heavy musk and engulfs your air passage like the mucus from a huge boil. You turn your house upside down looking for the damned creature in all the usual places, underneath the chairs, in-between the crevices of walls and behind your dressing table, all to no avail. The smell continues to pervade your home as you battle endlessly with cans of air fresheners and freshly scented oils. Then, one day, when you have finally given up hope, as the smell has all but eaten into the fabric of your home, you find the half decayed creature at the corner of your air conditioning vent, its semi-decomposed fur melting into the plastic of your cooling device. Ecstatic, you scream, grateful that you’ve found the wretched creature and wonder how it found such an awkward place to pass its last breath.

The same is true about love. You search for it in the most usual of places, at church, hook-ups, parties and in the arms of old friends – all without actualization. Then just as you are about to give up, just as you are about to throw in the towel and launch into the “who-needs-a-man?” attitude you find it. Dusty, rugged and entirely the opposite of what you planned. But you know it’s love because, …well because it is. You can’t explain it, you can’t define it and you can’t quite put your finger on how it happened but you know without a shadow of doubt, that it is love. The feeling literally catapults you unto a magical carpet ride. Your eyes are wired shut as little winged animals dance around in your gut and your heart threatens to implode from the sheer rush of it all.

This is exactly what happened to a friend of mine – Nneka*. After years of searching for love, she found Bayo*. But he wasn’t the tall, accomplished, age appropriate man she had spent the latter part of her twenties dreaming about. Instead he was a self-assured, 26 year old who was just starting his career. She on the other hand was 31, had her own flat and was a well positioned manager at a thriving multinational company. They’d met at a training course where she was an invited speaker and he was part of the tutees. They exchanged business cards during lunch and, barely two weeks later, their lips were locked in passionate kiss. At first, she thought it would be something physical, where she could find some sort of avenue to release sexual tension. But, as the relationship progressed, she found that the only physical tension was the difference in their ages. Bayo, to her, was perfect in every other respect. They shared similar passions in life; he understood her better than anyone she had ever dated and, more importantly, she knew he loved her and she loved him too. Unfortunately, a five-year age difference, coupled with the vast gap in their career and financial standing, caused Nneka to hide her relationship with her young lover from her friends for months- including me. But anytime we met up, I always commented about how radiant she looked. At one point, I actually suspected that she might be pregnant because she just had this glow and calmness about her.

In January this year, Nneka relented and told me about her relationship with Bayo. With tears in her eyes, she told me how Bayo had proposed on the 31st of December and how the realization of the hopelessness of their relationship finally hit her. The ring which was meant to be a symbol of his love for her became a reminder instead of just how impossible their love was to be. Nneka literally quivered as she asked me how she could marry someone who was not only younger in age, but was totally incapable of taking care of her. How was she going to introduce him to her parents? What would people think? Her biggest fear was also meeting his parents. “His mother would think I am an old dried-up woman who wants to come and steal her son” she said in between tears. I felt sorry for her on many levels. Being an old friend, I had seen her struggle in previous relationships and even without being told, I had seen the glow of happiness that she basked in when she was with Bayo. And now I could see the pain and bitterness she was in as she relayed her tale to me and her tears stained my pillowcase.

When she finally left my house, I couldn’t help but wonder how unpredictable love really is. We really have no way of choosing who we fall in love with. People argue that loving with your head is the only way to avoid the pitfalls of love; I disagree. Personally, I am of the opinion that any type of love which flows from a sensible disposition isn’t love; rather, it’s a watered down version of the original thing. To me, love is all about reckless abandon, the unexpected turn of events that make life colourful and worth living for, not the pre-calculated set of events that lead you to the one you think you ought to be with. To me the beauty of love is sometimes found in the awkwardness of the events that surround it all. The effort put in by both parties to surmount the challenges of being together, the difficult times that end with renewed reinstatements of love and the eventual strength of depth between the couple when they realize just how much they have overcome to be together. That, to me, is the genuineness of love- the capacity to make it work regardless of the awkward places in which we find it.

After much blood and tears, Nneka and Bayo will be getting married in two weeks. In February, Bayo got promoted to Assistant Regional Director, the youngest person in his company’s history to ever hold that position and has been transferred to the UK head office. The couple have decided to have a small civil ceremony with close friends and family just before they relocate. Nneka’s warm happy glow has returned and her mother-in-law to be loves her like a daughter.

To me, the lesson in this story is simple- sometimes it is in the awkwardness of love that we find the perfection we seek.

*The names and dates in this story have been changed to reflect the privacy of all those concerned.

Photo Credit: African Fathers

Glory is the host and executive producer of Inspire Series, the web talk show which uses the collective stories of everyday women to inspire others. She believes women are more than hand bags, hair, make-up and other externalities and is passionate about about pursuing purpose and living above societal conformities. She is also a day dreamer, and romantic at heart who loves TV, food and family. Follow her on Twitter and Instagram @inspiredbyglory and read more from her on www.inspiredbyglory.com

92 Comments

  1. loli

    March 15, 2011 at 1:36 pm

    This was very cute!…:)

    • Nwokeoma

      March 29, 2011 at 11:39 pm

      Love na wetin Hollywood use dey collect our money for Box office… Nice story though.

  2. eleven

    March 15, 2011 at 1:37 pm

    All for love..search for t in the most unreasonable place..

    http://www.elleven45.blogspot.com

  3. judith

    March 15, 2011 at 1:40 pm

    amazing story,yes love does springs up from places we never even tot of.it comes wen we have exhausht ur search ,hopes and expectations.Den GOD steps in ………W..A…L..A He gives u a surprise package.

  4. Aye Oh

    March 15, 2011 at 1:42 pm

    So true. Great write up, if only life happened with such idealism and everybody lived happily ever after. But as more andm ore women and men come to realise, a love like the one your friend experienced to the point of marriage is few and far between. If you find it, you’re one of the lucky ones.

  5. Abi

    March 15, 2011 at 1:48 pm

    nice!

  6. RMG

    March 15, 2011 at 1:51 pm

    awwww,i am happy for them.I wish them the very best.

  7. pinkynailz

    March 15, 2011 at 1:56 pm

    I wonder why all em ppl that rush to comment haven’t done so here today. I vote this must be a sensitive topic for them.BN has finally found a way to scare them away…yaaayyy!!!!!!! In btw,love is divine.it pulls down every obstacle against it.9ice one

    • mimi

      March 15, 2011 at 2:12 pm

      LOL! but you are so right.

  8. pinkynailz

    March 15, 2011 at 1:59 pm

    need i say this is my first comment ever.hahahahaha.2nd is a nice start.

    • Yemisi

      March 15, 2011 at 3:18 pm

      Lol, I’m really sorry to burst ur bubble but u are not quite 2nd.

    • Utaefi

      March 15, 2011 at 7:52 pm

      Don’t be so quick to be “THE AMAKA”! She’s only said she’s a first timer!

    • fokasibe

      March 16, 2011 at 9:07 am

      @ Utaefi, Yemisi said and I quote, “Lol, I’m really sorry to burst ur bubble but u are not quite 2nd” Was she second? You need to pick up reading glasses if you can’t see properly!

  9. Neighbor

    March 15, 2011 at 2:07 pm

    Oh so that’s how the term ‘Love-Rat’ came about! Comparing Love to a stinking rat. I see! But my dear, Love is not something to be found. Love is something you do. We have read this story countless times, Four years down the line, they are up for divorce. Don’t run with these fairytale notions. In Love you must balance your heart and head, It should be deliberate. Love is not a feeling you get, it is the things that you do.

    • Neighbor is so right!

      March 15, 2011 at 2:37 pm

      Great story Glory! I totally agree with Neighbor though. Love is not a feeling – it is what you do. Yes, it’s beautiful, but let’s stop romanticizing it unnecessarily.

    • DIVA

      March 18, 2011 at 11:04 am

      why are u so cynical….the fact that a couple went thru alot to be together they will surely remain together…having been around bad marraiges and divorces doesn’t mean u cant give credit to any couple till they pass the 10 year mark, going around with that sort of attitude wont even get you to the 10year mark when u get married…chillax…every pain you have been thru has made u stronger and the fact that u survived it is so u can help others thru…not depress them…cheers!

    • missy~spectacularrr

      April 14, 2011 at 3:41 pm

      thank you jare! ive been in a relationship for 8 years (engaged now) and the thing na hard work, grit and loads of tolerance. All this true love stuff ehn…no be small thing. Its more hard work than anything…anyway im derailing the thread. I love him to bits but it is not a walk in the park in anyway whatsoever.

    • Tomi

      March 15, 2011 at 2:47 pm

      Neighbor – you’ve hit the nail on the head.

    • say it as it is

      March 15, 2011 at 2:55 pm

      I don’t think these guys only focussed on the “feeling”.It is obvious this couple passed the “it is what you do” test of love before marriage.They faced challenges(age & status) and still made it work.If this isn’t the definition of love then i’ll like to know what is.

    • Tomi

      March 15, 2011 at 3:04 pm

      While I wish them all the best, I think it’s a bit premature to say they have made it. Quite frankly they have only just begun. When they come back after 50 years of marriage and say the same story, then we must applaud them.

    • Es Tee

      March 15, 2011 at 5:13 pm

      @ say it as it is, I agree with you.
      @ Tomi, yes, maybe we won’t be able to speak so much of the success of their love until some years down the line, but wouldn’t the same go for ANY and EVERY marriage regardless of the circumstances that led to the marriage in the first place? The fact that their love led to marriage is in itself a success, as far as I’m concerned. The story does not end there, yes, but if they’ve come this far, with hard work, resilience, love and God, they’ll stay together.

    • Neighbor

      March 15, 2011 at 8:31 pm

      I hate to break to you, but this is the exact formula of Fairy-tales, There is always a challenge. Climb a tower, slay a Dragon, climb to the highest mountain to get the golden geese and so on. Then they get married, full -stop. That’s what I see here, and many other stories. Frankly it needs to stop.
      The true test of love is what happens after, I want to read the story of a couple, who have had these challenges in marriage and after lots of years, they are still standing strong. That is when you can now talk of what Love is.

    • Yemisi

      March 15, 2011 at 3:20 pm

      AHHH!!! EPE!!

    • God's annointed

      May 26, 2011 at 6:40 pm

      The only thing Neighbor said which i agree with is that love is not a feeling, its something you do. Thats not to say that feelings are not important. We are told in Ecc 4:12 that a 3 chord strand is not easily broken; other than representing God, the man and his wife, it also represents the 3 types of love Agape (unconditional love), phileo (friendship) and eros (erotic love). To have a truely happy and successful marriage, all 3 must be present, because even if you are low on 2, you will have the third to see you through. Its unfair to say you expect them to be divorced in 4 years. To me the fact that (The effort put in by both parties to surmount the challenges of being together, the difficult times that end with renewed reinstatements of love and the eventual strength of depth between the couple when they realize just how much they have overcome to be together. That, to me, is the genuineness of love- the capacity to make it work regardless of the awkward places in which we find it. After much blood and tears, Nneka and Bayo will be getting married in two weeks.) was included in the article, it shows to me that they have been through some trials and came out strong. Success in marriage means different things to different people, to me other than staying married till death do you part, is actually having a happy marriage; which you can only have when all 3 forms of love are present. A lot of marriages today, especially in the older generation cannot boast of this. Primarily because alot of them are arranged marriages, learning to live with someonein tolerance isnt the same as love. I pray God’s blessings on all those who read this and take something away from it. I pray you experience and enjoy marriage as God intended. May He give you the grace to go through trying times….as they say, marriage is definitely NOT a bed of roses. But with Him, it can come close…….

  10. Tiki

    March 15, 2011 at 2:18 pm

    @pinkynailz…2nd? NOT QUITE!
    That being said, Glory, I want your autograph!beautifully written, simple, concise and to the point…love is found in the most awkward places, and tastes all the sweeter because we didnt expect to find it.But like neighbour said, finding love should not be the end of the journey, it should be a progression to another phase – keeping love. We fall in love by chance and divine blessing, but we stay in love by working at the relationship!

    • Purpleicious Babe

      March 15, 2011 at 3:55 pm

      i like the last sentence at the end…. it is awesome….

    • Theresa

      March 15, 2011 at 4:48 pm

      Bless you Tiki, such a true statement and yet so simple. May God help us to work on our relationships and not take the One we love for granted, because just like love grows, so also can it die.

  11. mariam

    March 15, 2011 at 2:19 pm

    this so touching,may the good Lord bless their union n give them both the grace n strength to deal with all odds: she brougth in favour into his life ….

  12. Duvy

    March 15, 2011 at 2:24 pm

    Ok… I love this piece.. Call me doubting thomas.. But be truthful to me Glory, was the end tweaked? What if situations remained the same and he was still not as rich? What if?

  13. pinkynailz

    March 15, 2011 at 2:47 pm

    @Tiki,awwwwww! thx for busting my bubbly balloon.

  14. my day

    March 15, 2011 at 2:50 pm

    love lives in strange places.

  15. Berry FeistyPen(Akan Nweke)

    March 15, 2011 at 2:56 pm

    Nice…very nice…but what if he was never promoted to anything and the motherinlaw didn’t like her…. Those are the real questions because that is when the real LOVE would be tested….

    • Afronubia

      March 17, 2011 at 12:03 am

      Exactly, the story would av made more sense if the chick had all these obstacles and still managed to stay with the man.

    • me

      April 19, 2011 at 1:16 pm

      Lets not deal with the negatives here…. The reality remains that he got promoted and the motherinlaw likes her… this is reality!

  16. nadine

    March 15, 2011 at 2:59 pm

    Lovely story……
    @pinkynailz… u’r so rit. I’m happy though, none of that “NOT QUITE” nonsense.. it’s getting lame

  17. Chi chi

    March 15, 2011 at 3:06 pm

    Hmn. Dis love bizness is realy tough for a lot of people. Unfortunatly, not evry1 wins like dis couple. Many ppl hav 2 ‘make do’ wit any1 they are able to ‘catch’. True love is rare, precious, nd very wonderful.

    • Senorita

      March 18, 2011 at 10:06 pm

      Very tru!!!

  18. cathy

    March 15, 2011 at 3:11 pm

    touched by reading this.luv is eternal

  19. Swiss

    March 15, 2011 at 3:18 pm

    Don’t quite like this older woman younger man affair!

  20. Adun

    March 15, 2011 at 3:40 pm

    Interesting write-up, although perhaps another analogy (other than using a dead rat) could be used. But I agree with Glory. Esp. these 2 lines “Personally, I am of the opinion that any type of love which flows from a sensible disposition isn’t love; rather, it’s a watered down version of the original thing.”. Even if he was not promoted or rich (I think Nneka* was in love with him regardless), but I guess it made her decision to marry him easier and truth be told, we all think about these things if we are being very honest. It is scientifically proven that females choose men based on certain qualities, and that is as old as time itself. And wrt the mother-in-law, one cannot but be relieved for her cos no one wants to start a marriage with ‘bad belle’. I’m happy for them, and I hope they enjoy their life together, even 50years from now…

  21. Ib

    March 15, 2011 at 3:40 pm

    Sigh..Glory I can always count on u to bring happy tears to my eyes,make me think and even more…right after a stressful day.Im really happy for your friend..wish her her all d best.

  22. Tomi

    March 15, 2011 at 3:41 pm

    nice one… im glad it has worked out for them so far. Afetr marraige they’ll need to continue working at it but they have a good chance since some of the issues have been worked out(finance, career and in-laws). Just shows how the economy is making women suffer… There are great guys out there but cos they dont have a good job, and cant take care of a nice lady are ineligible. A man needs to be able to take care of his woman… or else it will never work!!

  23. Purpleicious Babe

    March 15, 2011 at 3:52 pm

    awwwwww i agree… the idea of love has been watered down so much it becomes a logical thing…. but true love lasts forever and beyond and it stronger each time it is tested… awesome story.. I pray the geniune love that found them will keep them till the end and both will remain faithful to each other.

  24. adenike

    March 15, 2011 at 4:11 pm

    Wow!!! Nice article Glory… Love is highly unpredictable;you sure can’t predict whom you’ll fall in love with…..

  25. kenora

    March 15, 2011 at 4:39 pm

    amazin story..wht God say he will be he we be..am happy that they later got married wishing them all the best ad happiness.

  26. partyrider

    March 15, 2011 at 5:08 pm

    am reading this cute story and my friend is almost dying from a heart break 🙁

  27. Ncyluv

    March 15, 2011 at 5:34 pm

    This kind of love does exist but it is rare, you can decide to love someone and nurture it over time once the decision is MUTUAL. Love and Happiness is are choices most times.

  28. Ncyluv

    March 15, 2011 at 5:45 pm

    good

  29. suweddy

    March 15, 2011 at 5:45 pm

    you literallly stole my story. am married to be best man who understands me like no one else, despite age,status,etc. like westlife says we find love in odd places

  30. jide

    March 15, 2011 at 8:53 pm

    Beautiful Story

  31. Emaje

    March 15, 2011 at 9:36 pm

    Awww… This is so sweet and Glory thanks for some stating some obvious facts which I have closed my eyes to.

  32. Kemi

    March 15, 2011 at 9:45 pm

    neighbour is so right. Love is not something you find.It is a feeling you have for a person that makes you give them the best of you. Life is more than fairytales.

  33. Dola

    March 15, 2011 at 10:35 pm

    wow i sense some negative comments ooo..y cant u just be happy for them n stop sabotaging what their relationship will be in few years. some people start well n end well while some pple dont point taken but in their situation i pray it lasts. pple need to be positive in life i believe if u wait for ur true love and stay positive wit God on ur side u will get it.

  34. NNENNE

    March 15, 2011 at 10:58 pm

    I am happy 4 them and hope their love lasts a life time. But older woman,younger man affair is not and was never for me.( Not looking for love.LOL) Hope the guy will be there, when the woman”s body starts changing, when the honeymoon phase is over and reality hits home. That is just my concern.

    • aosgrl

      March 16, 2011 at 3:53 am

      Haba! Just how much “Change in the body” Can one experience with a Five year age difference? Nah Alien?

      Yes Love and relationship is hard work but at least let us let them enjoy getting over one hurdle. I’m quite sure they realize Marriage is a journey and there are many more leaps to be made.

    • TeeTee

      March 16, 2011 at 12:55 pm

      How do you know if the man will not ‘age’ before the woman? Not all women are built with the ‘orobo’ stature! Gosh Naija folks sha

  35. uchechi

    March 15, 2011 at 11:45 pm

    Nice…true love is not affected by medical, physical, social, and financial boundaries. As she said, its the ‘reckless abandonment’. Really, when we use these boundaries as a benchmark for love, we miss out.

  36. Dami

    March 16, 2011 at 1:01 am

    you know what? I’m actually tired of hearing love stories..like seriously. I think love is in fact sensible and practical..shoot me!n no i am not bitter, disillusioned..etc just a realist

  37. Mariella

    March 16, 2011 at 2:43 am

    Great article, however, I think its poor judgement on the part of the writer to make an analogy about love with a dead rat. SPeaking of distasteful!!! That just clouded my judgement of the whole article. Also, the fact that he has been transferred to the UK isn’t necessarily a good thing. Do you know how hard it is to break even there? Cost of livelihood, racism… I’m sorry I guess the rat thing ruined it for me, but this article is a bit too cheesy for my taste.

    • Tomi

      March 16, 2011 at 9:40 am

      Common Mariella, being transfered to UK as a regional manager is definitely different from starting a new job in the UK. I work for an international company.. relocation fees and all are usually paid. My company would even pay you like an international staff.. trust me girl it’s not the normal UK job.
      I am sure the guy is definitely over 26 and the lady over 31. Since when did 31 become old and dried up? I think the couple are like 31 and 36…or 32 and 37…
      Also starting their new life in a country like UK could be good for them bcos of less invasion of privacy. You know how Naija culture is everyone has a thing or two to say bringing problems …

  38. Reallaw

    March 16, 2011 at 5:19 am

    Thx Glory! Just found mine & working at it 🙂

  39. Ronnie's Jeans

    March 16, 2011 at 9:30 am

    Nice one Glory, well written!I was in this same situation recently but i had to be realistic.I’m a romantic but I’ve had my share of heart break to know that I have to balance my heart and my head.Maybe i just need to live a little but….

  40. Dazzle

    March 16, 2011 at 10:08 am

    I love you glory edozien! great write up…………………….. tears welling up in my eyes

  41. ESOSA

    March 16, 2011 at 10:55 am

    comparing the search for love to searching for dead rat seemed very odd but like your story i summounted the hurdle and was able to ead through to the end.Nice one Glory.

  42. dewowo

    March 16, 2011 at 10:58 am

    mi think d age gap is not too much. they r in d same generation, so there won’t b problem handling issues associated with “age”. the womam only needs to be in shape and look gud in order to keep it rockin. wishing them a happy & fufilled life thereafter…

  43. TeeTee

    March 16, 2011 at 12:53 pm

    I have a similar story – i loved him to bits and he simply adores me – if anyone has ‘predicted’ my marriage will be to a single man and younger man at my age, I would have said the person/prophet was from the pits of hell…but hey! I am happilly married indeed 🙂 All the best to the ladies out there and please its not about the package but whats in the heart. Treat the next man that comes your way with a proposal of friendship as a ‘possibility’

    God bless you all.

    • Tee

      April 22, 2011 at 5:39 pm

      aw i love this. wish ladies like you can be multiplied on earth

  44. ESOSA

    March 16, 2011 at 2:44 pm

    @TEETEE i dont get your story?you loved him to bits? so what hapened?

  45. Chances4Cougars

    March 16, 2011 at 5:17 pm

    Decent article, but the part that interested me was when the girl was crying because she was scared the guy’s mother would think the she was a “dried-up old woman who had come to steal her son away.”

    Why are women and females their worst enemies? Especially in Nigeria?

    The scenario is like this: Junior takes Virginia his long-time girlfriend who he had just asked to marry him to go and see his folks.

    They are greeted at the door by Junior’s dad, who embraces Virginia with happiness at seeing his dear son’s future wife. They sit down on the comfy lounges chatting, and then Junior’s mother comes into the living room.

    Junior introduces his fiancée to his mother: “Mum, please meet Virginia, my girlfriend. She is an accountant and works with Summit Bank.”

    Mum dukes says “Hello dear. How are you? How are your parents?”

    They all sit down for a while with Junior, Virginia and dad doing most of the talking while the mother looks on and chips in once in a while.

    The mother then says to the fiancée “I am preparing us dinner. Join me in the kitchen, dear.”

    In kitchen, the mum starts dicing okra with a huge sharp kitchen knife, changes to perfect pidgin without breaking her stride and without even looking at the fiancée says “As I de see you so, make you waka after you don chop dinner finish. You nor fit marry ma pikin o. You wey don see life finish and don waka town well well. Junior na small boy. Shebi you don hear wetin I talk so.”

    After which mum asks with a smile, a la Bree from Desperate Housewives “Do you want some tea? Or a soft drink perhaps?”

    Virginia is astounded. “Thank you Ma. Do you have Bitter Lemon? Or Parle Soda?”

    Meanwhile, Junior and daddy are sitting in lounge, chatting excitedly about Junior’s date and other arrangements, oblivious to the scenario which had just unfolded in the smoking cauldron that is their kitchen.

    It is funny – why do you think there is always usually wife and mother-in-law drama. Most men get along with their fathers-in-law. Well except for Robert De Niro’s character in “Meet The Parents”. Bob De Niro was a sadist, and Ben Stiller was a goof bag, so that is understandable.
    http://woahnigeria.wordpress.com/2010/09/26/cat-fights/

    • dewowo

      March 17, 2011 at 8:59 am

      daughter/mother-inlaw saga is one hell of a puzzle. it is only the man between d 2 dat can actuall solve it!

  46. Afronubia

    March 16, 2011 at 11:58 pm

    story sounds fake and made up esp the end.

  47. Sisi Yemmie

    March 17, 2011 at 12:55 am

    The moral of the story is on point!

  48. ibb

    March 17, 2011 at 11:32 am

    ”Age is nothing but a number”.Physical built or financial ground varies;the lady could be young and look so old or the man could be young and very rich.which ever way,age is nothing but a number.

  49. GLORIA ANTHONY

    March 17, 2011 at 11:38 am

    lovely piece…

  50. jessica

    March 17, 2011 at 11:39 am

    i had goose pimples all over me after reading this piece which so aptly describes our society’s view on love. We have defined everything by the society’s standards that we sometimes lose the only happiness we might ever have (love-wise that is, Except you do decide to get into a loveless marriage or be a baby mama). Word of advice from a novice: dont throw it away just cos it doesnt conform with what the society ( family, friends, etc) have mapped out. Wonderful piece Gloria. as usual you never fail to deliver…

  51. keke

    March 17, 2011 at 12:52 pm

    hmnnn…this is so true…most times, age, finances, looks, situation, tribal differences are the only road blocks to our heart desires and its high time we start taking it down!

  52. creamichoco

    March 18, 2011 at 2:58 pm

    awwwww dis so nice…i always love reading your posts glory and sis did nt disapoint…brought tears to my eyes..nd its axactly wat i was trying to explain to someone today….

  53. she said....

    March 18, 2011 at 3:43 pm

    This is so beautiful….i wish dem d very best…..*whisperin in silent prayer* i do hope i find it too in d very unsual place!

  54. Lepa

    March 18, 2011 at 8:09 pm

    Glory, i always enjoy your write ups but the ending sounds too good to be true & i hope you didnt make it up.
    The reality is that such relationships 99% of the time wont work. The obstatcles would just be too much and the parties crumble under its weight. This Bayo’s sudden promotion and relocation is always the way out that people in such positions pray for…but never get.
    I do wish them all the best thou and thx for reminding us that love wins in the end (sometimes)

  55. Mariamah

    March 22, 2011 at 4:56 pm

    The story is lovely,from a fairy tale point of view, but in real life it is not that easy, n i don’t fancy older woman, younger man kind of relationship.

  56. zulfa

    March 23, 2011 at 1:38 am

    ok, I’ve read everyone’s comment and i think i just have to say something, while i say good luck to this couple whatever works for them, but in reality its much more complicated, the yorubas say u don’t know a man character until he is rich, young men of these days are going after rich older women for financial gains, while the older woman having hustled all the streets of lagos and abuja is looking to retire, and its like the perfect match…………not quite, if the man came from a decent home and his mother is not an “iya oko Bournvita” she would ask her son-of all the women in town why this one? I don’t see why a 26 yr old man should rush into marriage with an older woman, it would have been a different case if she was 45 and he was 40, I’m sure this guy knows what he’s getting himself into, he wouldn’t touch her with a barge pole if she wasn’t loaded……………..

  57. Averie

    March 23, 2011 at 8:52 am

    I’v hope 2 find luv nw.

  58. sunny

    March 24, 2011 at 1:13 pm

    dis story relly hit home gloria! i find myself in d exact same shoes as ‘nneka’,only dat my own man still happens 2 b in school! but i no he has the drive 2 make it. i just wish ove wasnt so complicated! *sigh*

  59. emi

    March 26, 2011 at 4:53 pm

    Glory… babe once again you’ve made me go …sign!!!! this is beautiful. I’m happy for your friend and i wish her all the best in her marriage. But abeg whats with all these its its 50 years after the marriage pple sef ? haha can’t y’all just be happy for another chick who found love and happiness? Na wah for all these “i’m married and i know it all ” babes o jare .

  60. janet

    March 28, 2011 at 12:07 pm

    im kenyan….he is not kenyan…..he is five year s older and im in kenya…he is in UK….SO ITS NOT THE PERFECT ROMANCE……..lets be real..as my dad says..life is what u make it..marrying someone who is ur tribe…ur age….ur nationality doesnt guarantee u happiness.

  61. dee-zed

    March 30, 2011 at 12:50 pm

    Sometimes i just make myself believe love does not exist and that it’s all what i call “COINCIDENCE OF INFATUATION”. Love hurts! Especially when you cant be with the one you love, for obvious reasons. So please, as i will always advise, LOOK(very well) BEFORE YOU LEAP or else you get a heart wound that only God knows when it’s going to heal. Because, i know from experience that old wounds don’t heal completely, they reopen on another encounter(i mean, coming in face-to-face contact) with the one you love, even if it’s years after. So please, beware or rather be warned.

  62. GGGEEEEE

    April 8, 2011 at 4:08 pm

    so if bayo was never promoted to an asst regional manager and posted to uk head office,would the story have been different?ladies! ladies!no one can ever really understand you all!!

  63. Jolomi

    April 11, 2011 at 3:54 am

    Glory, I find myself precisely in the same situation as your friend. I am falling in love and its quite odd. He is 12 years older than I am, he is not as educated as I am, he is not as handsome and intelligent as I would love him to be but I am damm tripping for him. I am so worried about what my family and friends would say about me and him, and yet I cant get enough of him. Its strange, scary and sad.

  64. Mimi

    April 14, 2011 at 1:29 pm

    is this story real???

  65. lola

    June 15, 2011 at 11:37 am

    nice write up, but why are mother in law alway feel threating by their daughter in law

  66. ekua

    September 12, 2011 at 11:25 am

    sounds like a fairy tale………..

  67. Ure

    February 17, 2012 at 6:28 pm

    WOW! ITS AMAZIN HOW GOD WORKS!

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