Atoke’s Monday Morning Banter: Love So Pure, So Choking!

I love LOVE! The idea that someone has my best interest at heart warms me up immensely. Simply knowing that if something happens to me, there’s someone somewhere who will move mountains to get me out of that bind. Honestly, love is one of the most beautiful elements of humanity and it is the one thing that keeps me going.  Oh, and I mean true love by the way. The kind that’s pure, selfless and completely without airs; not the apparent display of affection that lacks depth.

You see, the beautiful thing about love is that most times, it’s effortless. You don’t really have to PROVE it exists, or that you feel it, it’s natural. There’s a primal need to protect and save the one you love,  something like a mother hen’s reaction when you try to take one of her chicks. Parental love (in most cases) is a good example of pure unadulterated love. Most parents would do what they think is the best to protect you and give you what they think is the best for you, because they love you and it’s a feeling that comes as naturally as the cold in Calgary!

I was going to put on my imaginary cleric’s collar and have the above talk with one of my relatives who had asked me to chat with her son. He had just finished his masters degree in the UK and he wanted to move back to Nigeria for work. Mommy had other plans. She wanted him to explore the options of doing his PHD, maybe in an Ivy league school in America. According to him, he was young and he had no business being here.  She went on to talk about how she wanted him to strategically position him for the future; it was all about him and how she wanted the best for him.

I think parental love is very profound but there’s also a thin line between wanting what’s best for someone and imposing your wishes and desires on them and it takes a genius to figure out how to carefully straddle that line. We’ve heard tales of parents who have insisted their children study “professional” courses because they “just want what’s best for them”. You hear tales of parents advising you not to marry from a particular country/tribe based on their own experience with that tribe/culture. Tales of parents trying to influence where their grandchild is born or where their children are receiving medical advice.  It can get really overwhelming sometimes and it has led to more than just simple disagreement in many homes. However, finding the balance is key. How does one then know when to take what is said as it is, and when to stand firm in your own beliefs and choose to chart your own course?

Someone once said that he who controls the purse, pulls the strings… basically who plays the piper dictates the tune. In essence she was saying that a lot of young adults are not financially independent and as such can’t assert their right to their own opinions or will.  It’s an arguable point and one that bears mentioning. It is one that makes you want to work harder and break from the shackles of financial bondage if it’ll make you have a say in your own life.

Anyway, I’ll leave you with this: life is too short to not make the best of your life. Find a reason to smile, keep your head up at all times. Remember that true love is something that everybody should experience because it is deep and beautiful. Have a beautiful week ahead.

Peace, love & cupcakes!

Toodles!

Photo credit:carolecgood.com