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BN Hot Topic: A Lady in the Streets Can’t Be a Freak in the Sheets?



Recently, for the sake of conversation, I’ve been asking for people to explain to me what makes Kim Kardashian a woman of loose morals. For every point they raise, I provide a counter argument and when they are unable to go any further someone slips in the “God said so” line! It’s utterly frustrating; nobody wants to present logical facts to back their stance – but what can we do? It’s the society we live in.

So really what makes one a woman of “less virtue”? I’ve been told it isn’t whether she’s a perpetual gossip, or a pathological liar or that she’s greedy and extremely malicious. It is not about the fact that she’s a perpetual debtor… It is simply about how many people she has or has not had sex with.

I find this point of view really hilarious but I heard something more interesting than funny while I was on this topic. Some guy said that there are certain sexual styles and positions he would engage in with only a certain type of woman.

Of course this piqued my curiosity.. “Ehn? Explain further please”. He proceeded to say that he wanted to have sex in certain ways with certain types of women before he gets married because he wouldn’t want to be “doing bad bad tingz with the wife I marry”. This kind of “interesting” logic always gets me because I like to understand how they are unfurled. So I asked again “Ehn? So some sexual styles are good and some are bad?” He tried to explain that he just believed some girls were adventurous and more experienced and they weren’t the type of girls one married. I needed more clarification. “What positions are good girl positions and what ones are for Bad Girl-trained-On-The-Sidewalk?”

When I shared this with my friends, we laughed and someone said “So how does this not add up to the “virgin bride” theory?” -the one that says that as a girl, you should wait until within the confines of marriage to “Do and Undo” with your husband. If the husband already believes that any evidence that you’re forming “contortionist” in bed is evidence that you’ve been a “bad bad gurl”

Anyway, what do you guys think about this? Do you agree that certain sexual styles are for certain types of women? Do you think married couples should not be adventurous with their sex lives? What would you define as a bad/good girl sexual style/position?

Let’s discuss!


You probably wanna read a fancy bio? But first things first! Atoke published a book titled, +234 - An Awkward Guide to Being Nigerian. It's available on Amazon. ;)  Also available at Roving Heights bookstore. Okay, let's go on to the bio: With a Masters degree in Creative Writing from Swansea University, Atoke hopes to be known as more than just a retired foodie and a FitFam adherent. She can be reached for speechwriting, copywriting, letter writing, script writing, ghost writing  and book reviews by email – [email protected]. She tweets with the handle @atoke_ | Check out her Instagram page @atoke_ and visit her website for more information.


  1. jcsgrl

    March 7, 2013 at 1:36 pm

    Urm Atoke, if you don’t believe that Kim K is morally loose then you should follow in her footsteps. Better yet, train your daughter to look up to her and emulate her. Are you kidding me? I don’t know who you’ve been arguing with but you cannot win that argument with me.

    • fan

      March 7, 2013 at 1:56 pm

      Kind gentle Godly Madam… could you please highlight in bullet point what makes kim K a morally loose woman?

    • Nomy

      March 7, 2013 at 4:26 pm

      Nne you don’t need points, like Jcsgirl has said, if you think she’sthe perfect model of womanhood follow her footsteps or raise your daughte to be like that. If you can’t do any of these two, then you have you answer then! Kim K is as loose as they come! Sex tape my foot!

    • Italian Princess

      March 7, 2013 at 2:05 pm

      Baby gurl… please help me point out the line where Atoke stated her opinion on aforementioned topic.


    • Tolani

      March 7, 2013 at 2:48 pm

      Please please please you can’t come and slander Atoke and think you’re safe. She asked questions; if you cannot answer them kindly trudge along.

    • Again

      March 7, 2013 at 2:53 pm

      omg. the only thing people ever point to is that she did a sex tape (whether or not she intended for it to get out is another story) but really how does that make her morally loose or any more morally loose than the next person. So many have sex without marriage. The only thing is hers is on tape and by the way that YEARS ago. She even apologized for the tape sef. So then assuming you think she was wrong, doesn’t our own so called morals teach us to forgive and move on. She hasn’t killed, stolen money, stolen your husband, lied to your face about anything important so what’s loose about that.

    • jcsgrl

      March 7, 2013 at 3:47 pm

      so these are the only things that qualify as morally loose? Morally loose – having no boundaries of right and wrong; anything goes. Might I remind you that this chick is having a baby for another man while still being married to another and flaunting it proudly? Hmnn nna ehn!

    • Madam the Madam

      March 7, 2013 at 2:59 pm

      You sound very ridiculous, aunts judgina. Go on with your pure and chaste self na. Nonsense

    • o

      March 7, 2013 at 4:12 pm

      lol @ Judgina

    • Egbon

      March 7, 2013 at 10:46 pm

      Jcsgirl, u are so clueless it’s amazing……it’s obvious u don’t even know much about Kim neither have u even been following anything…….una go dey join others to talk wen una no even know the end and beginning of the matter……her divorce has been a drag and its obvious they have both moved on to other relationships, they don’t live together and the formalization of the divorce is just a matter of delay and intrigues in the law process……so cos of that Ur only song is to define her as loose with Ur sanctimonious and ignorant self……anyway since we don’t know Ur life story and all the men u might have slept with or the kind of gymnastics u are capable of in bed we shall forgive Ur self righteous comment..

    • jcsgrl

      March 7, 2013 at 3:22 pm

      Ok so she’s a good girl? So why is she not your role model? You have made mistakes abi? Her sex tape was not a mistake. why do you ppl keep saying that? She was just following after her bff Paris HIlton. A quick tool to popularity in America for young girls is a sex tape. Kim chose to use that means to propel her to superstardom and it worked for her. I’m not knocking her hustle but all things are expedient but not all things are beneficial. I’m sure if you sit down and ask Kim in the soberest of her moments what she feels about her life, she would not choose the path she’s following. This is what the world is turning into…you point out wrong doing and everyone accuses you of judgement. Sin is Sin! Infact let me start my response in a new post…smh

    • Madam the Madam

      March 7, 2013 at 3:43 pm


    • Anonymous

      March 7, 2013 at 6:03 pm

      If sin is sin then we can all agree that enough Nigerian women virgins and non virgins alike are going to hell? whether her sex tape was a mistake or not like you said it happened she picked up the pieces and made lemonade from the lemons thrown at her. I refuse to believe she will say she doesn’t like the life she is living. She still has men who love her and one who has no problem with her being the mother of his child. If sin is sin then all Nigerian women doing “funny things” for the purses they carry and for the red bottoms they wear should understand that they are not left out of it. Please people should learn to stop judging people because they sin differently from them. Enough of the self righteousness a man like the one atoke mentioned in her post is the type that has had a full life and wants to rip where he did not sew but here is where these men get it wrong if you’ve had a past that is questionable and think you will end up with a good girl you have something else coming for you. You may marry her but trust me that is just the beginning of your battle Because God will not watch you destroy the life of others and let you get away with it most especially if you have not been honest with yourself and the woman you want to bring into your problems. God doesn’t work that way so when strange and funny things begin to happen to people don’t wonder why trace your footsteps back to your past and how honest you have been to yourself and those around you about it. If a girl is morally loose and she is honest about her wayward ways and knows when to give it up, I think there is more to be said about her character than many who walk around pretending to be what they aren’t and then end up in marriages from hell. Think about it please.

    • Its an anonymous comment!

      March 7, 2013 at 8:33 pm

      Darling for instance, If you have had 5 boyfriends in your life and you did naughty things with them or you had sex with them, does that make you a bad girl? If you married someone and in the process of a DIVORCE (which everyone knows about, that point infact is dum) found love and oooups you had sex and are now pregnant does that mean u should hide it? Cos her’s is public doesn’t make her worse than the next girl. We are all the same, sinners, the diff is that the world makes some sins look bigger than others. Check yourself before you cast that stone darling

    • peace

      March 7, 2013 at 9:39 pm

      Her sex tape was not a mistake? so you where in the room with her and rayj? oh but rayj is a saint yeh? becuase he is a man? woman like you are the problem!!! making already double standards high! No one is saying she has to be a role model. heck oprah is not my role model. but nothing KIm k has done is worse than what we all know you do behind your closed doors. Oh you do not have pre-marital sex? The likes of Oprah and such yall carry on your head has been in a non-marital relationship oh. having sex outside of marriage….but she is a role model. anoufia!

    • Naija4life

      March 10, 2013 at 11:25 pm

      Jscgrl, please don’t waste your valuable time with people who are blinded and try to justify low standards of morality. There is NOTHiNG wrong with holding yourself to high standards…it doesn’t make u a ‘judgina’ as the patronizing commentators are calling you nor does it make you self righteous….so we all know NO ONE is perfect but what has the society become that we make excuses for people who display no moral decorum? Likely the sign of the end times…that is why our dear country is a mess…we are parading people who bombard criticisms at those who are speaking morality and mocking them. What a shame!…please to each his own…there’s another day in paradise..God is not a fool that He will be mocked…

    • Cheese

      March 31, 2013 at 9:35 pm

      I just want to quickly point out that just because you don’t think someone is of loose morals does not automatically mean you have to choose the person as a role model. Choosing a role model is not just based on the other person’s sex life.

      As you were.

    • you

      April 11, 2013 at 1:18 pm

      you havent made a clear response. dumbass

    • anonymous

      March 7, 2013 at 3:28 pm

      exactly!! tell your daughter to take Kim as her role model if truly you like her. God bless you jcsgrl

    • Autoprincess

      March 7, 2013 at 4:45 pm

      I hope you and jcsgrl also know that sleeping with someone who is not your spouse is immoral and downright against the word of God, since you are bent on preaching the bible to us. Cos you come here thinking that one sin is smaller than another, when you sleep with that ya boyfriend wey never put ring on it, you are in the same category as KimK.

    • sweets

      March 7, 2013 at 6:07 pm

      Becos we all got to see her sex tape doesnt mean YOU havent done worse or less dat wasnt captured . there r alot of quiet girls dat are silent whores trust mi . pple be condemn others lik mother theresa lik dey r holy but dey CVs hav mor dan 20 men on deir list . we hav all made bad relationship mistakes pls nd no one is perfect . i dnt hate kim K sef wud u compare her to janet jackson or madona ( dey hav deliberatli don porn ) so wat r we talkin about here . + men r jus d greatest pretenders dey wud marry d naive geh nd cheat on d wife wit d ones who like acrobatics , why dey cant explore wit deir wives is jus beyond me .

    • Lisa

      March 8, 2013 at 9:01 am

      The fact that she made money off the sex tape is what made her morally wrong. She could have put a gag order on the production company, but she turned around and profited from it, common now who does that. Then while she was with Reggie Bush, she was busy creeping around with this so called Kanye West, and when she was married to her husband, she was still busy creeping around with Kanye West and trying to hook up with Reggie. Who among you would do something of such? That is just straight up disgusting and morally wrong. Consequence and his girlfriend- Jen the pen- put Kanye and Kim on a blast, it’s all over the internet. Kim K. is just trash.

    • Miss Tee

      March 7, 2013 at 6:50 pm

      are you a virgin? if you are, then you can trash Kim K… else, you have no write whatsoever to judge her… if you’re sexually active with your boyfriend then there’s no difference.. only that she recorded hers and it got leaked. let he without sin cast the first stone!!!!!!

    • AW

      March 7, 2013 at 8:13 pm

      You don’t have to get personal!

    • Vexing

      March 7, 2013 at 11:00 pm

      AW she has to get very personal…..are they virgins? The truth is if u have ever opened your legs for any man then u are equally quilty……sin is sin, God hates fornication and its just a few women who have been able to stay away from sexual activity till they marry…….ignorant fools will be opening their mouths to use Kim’s sex tapes to call her loose, is she worse than ple like Rihanna who is now doing drugs and uses every opportunity to show her body to the world? Did u even watch the episode where Kim and her family heard about the sex tapes? She cried and cried and they had to pay and get the FBI involved to stop the circulation……Kim is not my role model neither do I even still watch their show but for sanctimous ple like them to be making noise and talking stale crap about her being loose cos of sex tape is so lame and annoying…..we don’t know what they do in Dia homes and Or dia boyfriends homes behind closed doors so ple shld zip it already……

    • Omolondon

      March 7, 2013 at 10:36 pm

      Jcsgirl, u are typical of all hypocritical Nigerians who think they are more morally upright than others……what has Kim done that women in our society have not done? That she made a sex tape? Do u not know that it happens in our backyard? She is popular and the media takes advantage of that to put her every where so how is that her fault? She makes money from her fame how is that her fault? If u are bold and truthful let us have a glimpse of what u do in the bedroom and how many men u have slept with in Ur life then we can now judge if u r a good girl or not…..una go just dey pretend meanwhile if put in the same circumstance u will do worse……

    • Rukky

      March 8, 2013 at 12:25 am

      Jaw to the floor–Fly enter mouth lol 🙂

    • MrsO.

      March 8, 2013 at 1:59 am

      First of all I’ll respond to jcsgrl and some readers on here that have made comments. I think there’s a misunderstanding and I kind of understand jcsgrl’s and the other readers point of view. Personally, I could careless for Kim K. However, in support of jcsgrl, do I believe she’s morally loose? Yes, I’d say her actions are. I think most readers on here are not thinking deeply about the question. The fact that it’s “the norm” in the world we live in today does not make it right. To support other readers, she made a sex tape with her then boyfriend Ray J which leaked(fortunately or unfortunately for her). Okay? How many unmarried couples out there make sex tapes? She’s pregnant for someone she’s not married to, while still married to another and flaunting it? Uhh… How many people today get pregnant out of wedlock? I’m sure it’s not her desire to still be married to Kris. I also don’t think she’s “flaunting” it. She just happens to have a reality show that displays her life for all to see. But while we’re over here worrying about who’s daughter should emulate her, the chic and her family combined according to sources will be worth a billion in about two years. Kim K is just a regular girl who had something unfortunate happen to her and capitalized big time on it. When was the last time our own country invited any of us to a concert and paid us $500k to get up on stage just for a few seconds? Tell me. I’ll wait! That girl is building a fortune and I bet she doesn’t at this point care about some sex tape. If anything, her and her family I’m sure have that as number 1 on their thank you list every year thanksgiving comes around. Lol

      To answer your question Atoke without writing a book, I think married couples should be very adventurous with their sex lives with boundaries of course. Sex is God’s gift to marriage. He designed it for marriage and married couples ought to enjoy it. I’m not sure what dude is talking about with the special positions and certain type of girls for it. To me he’s talking crap. I don’t even want to begin to respond to his views.

    • funmi

      March 18, 2013 at 9:50 am

      If you charge her based on the moral you hold as a person, then u are biased. Not being luck in-love and being attracted to a particular kind of personality as in (men) does not make one a cheap girl. we all have made our share of mistakes. I have, so i wont cast the first stone.

    • Toyin

      March 25, 2013 at 12:19 am

      Stick to your opinion, it’s fine. It’s ridiculous when someone has a different opinion from the majority, public or society he/she is attacked. It baffles me the way Nigerian women vouch for Kim K. I didn’t realize the obsession with her until i come on these blogs. I’m convinced white superiority is still very much alive. If Kim K was a fellow black woman, there will be easy hatred from black people themselves. But, because she’s a non black woman, and considered beautiful, Nigerians idolize her. The fact of the matter is, Kim K knew the only way to be famous was put out a sex tape because she has nothing else to offer. So, it’s rather hysterical when idiots defend, fight for this useless woman. She made money based on FOOLISHNESS. And, who cares if she’s rich maybe I’m just different. I will rather make my money with integrity than dirty money. If I have my own opinion, I’m entitled to it and should express it freely. It also shows that the reason many women especially Nigerian girls defend this useless lady is because they know what they do, so they can relate to her going from one man to the another, insecurity, and just seeking attention even when it’s negative. But keep in mind, not all women are like that or relate to Kim K. Yes, she’s morally loose to some because there are still some people who hold on to some type of morals/values or standards. Just because many are losing sight of right from wrong doesn’t make it okay and doesn’t mean you are being judgemental.
      Sex is a beautiful, natural connection shared between a man and woman. Even more beautiful when shared between husband and wife. However, within marriage there’s still boundaries. Husbands and wives should freely enjoy and be able to communicate what gives them pleasure and please each other. I personally, I love to please my man sexually, and I made it clear to him my do’s and don’ts sexually. The problem is, some are more perverted, aggressive, than others. So, anal sex, tying me up, punishing me is NOT my thing. And if hubby suggests any of these, he will have to get his head checked. Then again, these are things we will discuss prior to marriage.


    March 7, 2013 at 1:37 pm

    I think once you are married, you can engage in any sexual styles and positions you want. However, the things that are clearly wrong, like anal, blow jobs, some other bad bad things I can’t write….those ones you won’t engage in but would want to experience. I think that’s where your friend is coming from. Like, he won’t want to disrespect his wife by asking her for a blow job, but would gladly ask the girl on the streets for one. Meanwhile I don’t think you can ever go wrong by staying a virgin until marriage…Your husband will teach you all you need to know.

    • Enty

      March 7, 2013 at 1:48 pm

      WOW! Blow jobs are not for married men ? Now I see why so many married Nigerian men have girlfriends. I think married couples need sexually adventure as much as prayers to keep their relationship fresh and exciting. If having sex in public places or giving my husband a blow job is bad, then I am a very filthy bad girl. Thank goodness my hubby loves me just as I am.

    • A.D

      March 7, 2013 at 2:00 pm

      I think it’s all different strokes for different folks, I for one am not a supporter of the blowjobs and anal and all the bad bad things, Lol, so I think I get what your friend was trying to say , i. My opinion, it’s going to be disrespectful to me though cos camaannnn, there are loads of positions to try and even invent, so I think there are actually some bad bad things that wouldn’t be ‘marriage befitting’

    • Bella

      March 7, 2013 at 3:05 pm

      OMW, Adanne, are you serious? Felatio is now a sin with the man you married, NO wonder nigerian man are promiscous, it is because of the likes of you, why wont you please your husband sexually! so you don ‘t like it when he goes down on you either? I pity you hey. Ladies, do what ever position you are COMFORTABLE with, with your man to lessen the chance of him coming to the streets for pleasure. Its in the confines of your home. Staying a virgin is a personal choice, and as for him teaching you – gosh you are not serious! you are both supposed to learn , read, watch and listen to your needs and what you both need to do. I cannot believe that in 2013 we still have such cob web mind sets. I really hope you are not married, for if you are, and you are not blowing your man, you better hope that he is not getting blown elsewhere and that you are staying cleer of it cause of your choice and not his. Men are freaks and they want their wives to be equally freaks and not nuns in the bedroom!

    • sweetie

      March 8, 2013 at 12:54 am

      Thank you jare!!!!

    • Bleed blue

      March 7, 2013 at 1:50 pm

      LOL…Are you being serious?

    • lilz

      March 7, 2013 at 2:02 pm


    • chioma

      March 7, 2013 at 2:04 pm

      yh staying a avirgin till u marry is key. but gurllllll not giving ur hubby a blow job cos its disrespectful ?! how extremely naive. dey there na house girl go dey blow am for u

    • sweets

      March 7, 2013 at 6:43 pm

      Becos we all got to see her sex tape doesnt mean YOU havent done worse or less dat wasnt captured . there r alot of quiet girls dat are silent whores trust mi . pple be condemn others lik mother theresa lik dey r holy but dey CVs hav mor dan 20 men on deir list . we hav all made bad relationship mistakes pls nd no one is perfect . i dnt hate kim K sef wud u compare her to janet jackson or madona ( dey hav deliberatli don porn ) so wat r we talkin about here . + men r jus d greatest pretenders dey wud marry d naive geh nd cheat on d wife wit d ones who like acrobatics , why dey cant explore wit deir wives is jus beyond me .

    • civ

      March 8, 2013 at 7:10 am

      lmaooooo….so true

    • Italian Princess

      March 7, 2013 at 2:38 pm

      Where will virgin husband have learnt the things which he intends to bestow upon virgin wife? #JustAsing

    • jenny

      March 7, 2013 at 4:08 pm

      Thank you, double standards every where

    • Adia

      March 7, 2013 at 4:17 pm

      Gbam at Italian Princess! I troway bombom for you my fellow princess!
      Jenny abeg help us dey see o! Double standards much! gosh!!

    • Jay

      March 7, 2013 at 4:30 pm

      i tire oh

    • CuriousShe

      March 7, 2013 at 7:32 pm

      Thank you O!! Solid question!

    • nwanyi na aga aga

      April 9, 2013 at 11:07 am

      My mother taught my brothers about virginity just as she taught me, recently i was talking to my younger brother about all the girls he was putting up on his dp. i was shocked when he said and i quote ‘ Nne i am not sleeping with any of them chill. i have not been touched, i am waiting till marriage. Tears left my eyes. he is just 22, i pray God sees him thru. so if u want men to learn chastity, teach ur male children, teach them. I have 4 male friends who have confined in me that they have not penetrated women before and they all above 26, so please dont think men dont know about chastity, its all about how you value yourself. Teach ur male children, teach ur brothers, teach your nephews, imagine a world were we all do that? will men not know their own chastity is important?

    • Again

      March 7, 2013 at 2:57 pm

      double standard alert. so you’re assuming that my husband would have done it plenty times and I’d be the virgin. how else do you think he can teach me all i need to know. lol.I’m not saying both must be virgins just calling out this assumption that he won’t be

    • OOG

      March 7, 2013 at 3:42 pm


    • Priscy

      March 7, 2013 at 3:47 pm

      Are you for real?? NO BJ???? If you are married, and u r not giving him BJ, ur husband is most likely getting it outside. Its good to remain a virgin till u are married but saying ur husband will teach u all u need to know when u are married implies that he has experienced it. So virginity is limited to only women abi?

    • Diseye

      March 7, 2013 at 4:22 pm

      Shut up Adanne. Learn from which husband? Why is he too not a virgin? Is fornication only for women? So what’s wrong with blow-jobs? You sound like a frigid chick sha. I don’t see how all the things you listed are bad if it’s between two consenting adults.

    • Dr CeeK

      March 7, 2013 at 4:33 pm

      This is why i can’t marry all these “sister Mary-Amaka Virgins”
      Blow Job a Sin?! If he’s not getting it from u, He’s getting it else where!

    • Again

      March 7, 2013 at 4:54 pm

      Don”t mix up a virgin with a prude.

    • Chi

      March 7, 2013 at 5:26 pm

      CHINEKE!! All of you people haff spoil finish!! Biko, i’m very much innocent and the way some of you people are going its like all your wisdom and knowledge and energy are focused on how to please your man in bed. I am certainly no saint, and I know that sex plays a big part in a marriage. However, heaven knows that I will not put a mans penis in my mouth to suck, all because I want to keep/please my man…a na ma pu ala??? Someone also said, I must not enjoy cunninglius…maybe I do, but I sure as hell won’t disrespect my man by asking him to lick me out…knowing full well what kind of things have come out of my garden!!!! (This is why I said maybe thats where the writers friend is coming from…in that, its ok to ask a short term girlfriend to suck your dick, cause she aint the mother of your daughters and she won’t kiss your kids with that same fowl mouth) I am a roman catholic and choose to abide to God’s word. Some of you pagans, will now come and start asking me where in the bible did God say we should not suck dick?! Ask your mothers? All I know is that sex is a respectful activity when done with the right person. Some positions are for porn/expilicit movies. The girls here that are banging on about doing anything and everything to keep your man are probably insecure and terrified of loosing him. Sex isn’t everything..if your husband can stoop so low and collect head from your house girl, then you should have never married him…. o tan!! I’m beginning to ramble and it might get personal so let me stop!! Somebody commented that its all about personal preference…perhaps thats the only truth here.

    • Rachael

      March 7, 2013 at 5:44 pm

      Where in the Bible does it specify that a particular sex position is for explicit movies?

    • Again

      March 7, 2013 at 6:28 pm

      even if your man/woman won’t get these things elsewhere because their own morals or belief prevent them from cheating, i think a good spouse still wants to please his/her partner. God never said don’t suck his….or lick her….. Plus what has come out of these things that is so nasty. If nastiness is the issue, then start by sucking with a condom on it or start by using a dental dam when you lick her. See problem solved for you. I’m sure your man/woman will take it anyway they can get it. a dental dam is like a condom for the vagina. if you don’t want to buy one, just use any clean nylon type material that will still allow the girl feel what you’re doing

    • babylawyer

      March 7, 2013 at 6:30 pm


    • tits!!!

      March 7, 2013 at 6:44 pm

      you r sooo naive!!!!ask ur mother if she dint blow ur DAD!! dey dere make PANT DEY WEAR U.

    • ChidinmaN

      March 7, 2013 at 7:25 pm

      It’s puzzling the way most of y ou think but I blame it on our society and it’s primitive judgemental ways. What really makes Kim Kardashian a woman of loose morals? That she made a sex tape with her boyfriend of 4 years and it leaked? She didn’t sit around start crying about but she embraced it and made the best out of it? She got married to the wrong guy and he’s giving her a terrible time to get a divorce? We all go through divorces, she didn’t let that bring her down either, she’s moving on with her life and having a child with the man she loves, yes our society frowns on children being born out of wedlock. I don’t blame people who don’t feel the urgent need to get married, with the high level of broken homes and dirvorces. If anything I look at Kim as an overcomer because she’s made the best out of most bad things that have come her way. As for these men that don’t want to marry a woman who’s sexually diversely, that just amazes me, it just all boils down to the primitive thinking of our society. Sex is a way husbands and wives celebrate their love, you want to try new styles to keep it fresh and interesting.

    • ant

      March 7, 2013 at 9:21 pm

      I am sorry girl but you sound super retarded and this is from a fellow catholic!

    • Sisieko

      March 7, 2013 at 10:04 pm

      Chi, i beg to disagree with you o! My hubby and i have been married for 8years now and the only thing we dont do is anal. I dont believe some positions are just for porn movies. I dont want to go into details but i think you should consider giving your hubby a blow job, you wont believe how much he will appreciate it. Sex is really important in a relationship and i think that both husband and wife should go out of theircomfort zone. The only thing i am against is anal or threesomes….. we will never do that!

    • Exotic

      March 8, 2013 at 4:03 pm

      Seriously!!! Insecure? Lwkmd! My sister when that man loves you right no ice cream will be sweeter than his magic stick * enough said*

    • Idak

      March 7, 2013 at 5:32 pm

      I don’t even know where to start with you.
      I’ll keep it simple; you need help and urgently too.

    • Sparkling

      March 7, 2013 at 5:33 pm

      Babe/Madam, do you mean you can not give your hubby a blow job if he ask for it?then better wise up because he will surely get it elsewhere and probably in the street.there is no shame in marriage,give ur bodies to each other in love……..that is the principle.Always endeavor to satisfy ur spouse regardless of the style/position.

    • peace

      March 7, 2013 at 9:45 pm

      YOU ARE THE PROBLEM WITH NIGERIAN MEN! Why is it ok for your husband to ask for sex outside your marriage because somethings are degrading to you??? So its ok for him to play with girls on the street just so he “respects” you???? You do not know him doing that is the utmost disrespect! Women like you who make excuses for cheating are the problem we have in that country and why the moral decay would continue to eat through it at an alarming rate!

    • civ

      March 8, 2013 at 7:06 am

      wow, i dint want to comment but 4 dis comment, i wll…how can u say blow jobs and all other stuff are not for married men, this is why married men go out and have affairs. naija people d way we reason eh!

    • Mrs J

      March 8, 2013 at 8:12 am

      LOL, I am married, and a woman AND a born again Christian, and NO there are no limits in the bedroom. Marriage gives everyone the freedom to communicate, there should be no problem regarding wanting and giving oral sex in a marriage, or any position. As long as your spouse is comfortable with it. It is a lifetime of adventure, dont get it twisted!

    • Tr

      March 21, 2013 at 10:08 am

      Well said!

    • Jamce

      March 8, 2013 at 9:53 pm

      @Adanne, please what is wrong with a blow job? What is disrespectful in giving or receiving oral sex? Please we would like some education here.

    • Kendikane

      March 31, 2013 at 6:16 pm

      How is ur husband supposed to teach u if he hasn’t been doing “bad bad things” with other women. I hope for ur sake that ur husband doesn’t get his BJs frm someone else. A good relationship is one in which both people can honestly communicate their sexual needs to one another.

  3. shay shay

    March 7, 2013 at 1:43 pm

    lol… boys will be boys. Then they will still complain that their wives are boring in bed after deliberately selecting the ‘good girl’.

  4. Berry Dakara

    March 7, 2013 at 1:46 pm

    Oh lawd, I’m coming back to comment ANONYMOUSLY!!!!!!!!!!

  5. JADE

    March 7, 2013 at 1:47 pm

    Nne gwamuife biko! what is wrong with blowjobs and how is it disrespecting?i understand the anal sex part but please explain to ur sister what is wrong with blowjob

  6. Virgins Unite

    March 7, 2013 at 1:52 pm

    I’m sorry, but a bunch of Nigerians are freaking hypocrites. Men that want to do “bad things with bad girls” before they marry someone else and have “good sex?” So those girls you do “bad things” with, should never marry shey? Idiots!

    Listen, once you get married, I don’t believe that ANYTHING is off-limits! No wait, no threesomes or othersomes. But blow jobs, check! Sixty-nine, check! Missionary, side-ways, cowgirl, reverse cow-girl, upside-down, up-against-the-wall, on the floor, on the bed, in the shower, every room in the house, etc IS FINE! IT IS JUST SEX!

    Oh and everyone needs to leave Kim the heck alone. So she had sex and it was videotaped, BIG FREAKING DEAL! If someone hadn’t leaked that tape, would anybody have any issues with her? No!

    • Tincan

      March 7, 2013 at 2:00 pm

      Ah! Whish one is cowgirl again? Just when I think I know…

    • Italian Princess

      March 7, 2013 at 2:39 pm


    • Again

      March 7, 2013 at 3:00 pm

      abi. Cowgirl is when you’re riding the guy facing him…like you ride a horse. Reverse cow girl is when you’re riding him turned in the other direction (like if you were on a horse you could see the horse’s bottom not it’s face)

    • Madam the Madam

      March 7, 2013 at 3:06 pm

      Cowgirl is woman on top.

    • kia

      March 7, 2013 at 6:42 pm

      Hia! which one is sixty-nine biko? tot i knew every position…lol

    • Again

      March 7, 2013 at 7:23 pm

      69 where your lips are touching/sucking his dick and his lips are licking your vagina at the same time. to that, one of you will be laying upside down

    • Idak

      March 7, 2013 at 8:06 pm

      type it in numerals. it makes sense that way.

    • Ready

      March 8, 2013 at 2:10 pm

      69…look at the figures. Your face is facing his down and your down is facing his up. Wait, BN, how graphic can we get before y’all start bleeping things or not showing our comments?

  7. Stella Kashmoney

    March 7, 2013 at 1:52 pm

    So a man asking his wife for a blow job is disrespectful in 2013. I cannot believe some people still think like this. What is so disrespectful about it?There is nothing like good/bad girl sexual position. I believe married couples should be adventurous with their sex lives. You have to keep the fire burning.

    • Dayo B

      March 7, 2013 at 2:27 pm

      What is even more scary is that some folks still believe that their husbands….yeah these prudish husbands afraid to “lick a woman up and down” will teach them everything they need to know about sex…scary scary hypocritical bullshit in this country. I reckon it’s what is being taught at fellowship these days (yeah, right after the pastor/imam screws some underage girl doggy style and gets her to such him off). I MEAN, JUST WHERE DO WE GET OFF telling people what is good/bad sex? I want to see what religious book specifically tells people the “acceptable” sex positions. Bloody hypocrites! Since when did we start deferring all forms of thinking to others? If the husband will teach all we simple girls all we need to know, biko how did he learn? From sleeping with other men or women or just a blow-up doll? Do we reason at all? One person’s sexual pleasure is another person’s scary sex….but at the end of the day, as long as its between consenting adults, wetin concern good/bad or marriage off-limit sex?

      BN, biko freedom of speech so please post this.

    • Tasha

      March 8, 2013 at 12:26 am

      Lool ohk me being the Jesus freak that I am and basing everything on the Bible (or at least trying to).. I was listening to a sermon by Myles Munroe where he spoke on the bible keys to a good family/home. He referred to Prov 24:3-5 and other stuff. But I’m recalling it now and thinking have we adopted the world’s way of marriage, its keys, wisdoms, patterns… It’s like everyone here has the mind set on not just sex as the glue to marriage but like every type of sex that piques ur fancy. TBH I’ve never really thot about it, if everything and anything was open in sex in marriage. I do believe like all things the devil has introduced corruption into sex, participants are corrupted and the ways are corrupted so by that logic maybe not every sexual act-potistion may actually be right. Also recall a book I read by Chris Okotie a long time ago on the end time, a fictional story but he made some claims as to why anal sex is downright anti-God, I didn’t really get it then and wasn’t concerned with that aspect of the story but now wonder if he was on to something. But in addition the Apostle Paul says spouses should not deny each other the pleasure of each others bodies but if ur mind is already perverted and you require perverted acts from ur spouse……? Having said all these I’m not gonna list what I feel is alright and what isn’t. I think even I have to renew my own mind as to what I have come to accept from society as the norm. Anyone who’s got some Godly insight please share

  8. 'Mide

    March 7, 2013 at 1:54 pm

    Men love the psychological pleasure of having a mate that is perceived as virtuos. For
    most , it demonstrates or signifies a woman that can mate and be expected to not cheat.The other woman for free for all is expected to be public property that serves as
    common services that is used and discarded,NOT TO BE KEPT

  9. The original Beebee

    March 7, 2013 at 1:59 pm

    @ Virgins unite……im feeling you on this one!!! Merci

  10. Neo

    March 7, 2013 at 1:59 pm

    I dont know about all these bad bad things you people are talking about. *licking mango nearby*

    On a serious note though, i think sex within marriage should be the best sex, marry your friend so that you are not shy to tell him/her what you like. Sex will not be a midnite, off the light, thorw on heavy blanket even in scorching heat affair. If you cannot tell your husband/wife that you are the type that likes to dangle from silken sheets tied to the ceiling, biko who will you tell. But everybody should have their limits, i dont believe there is any sinful way to have sex within a marriage, its a matter of preference or personal inhibitions. Just bcos Mrs A can replicate every move in the karma sutra doesnt make her morally bereft when compared to Mrs Missionary style-off-light-its-a-wham-bam-affair! To each his own!

    • lilz

      March 7, 2013 at 2:07 pm

      lllooooooollllllll….i love you for this comment

    • Tony

      March 7, 2013 at 2:24 pm

      well said!!

    • Bleed blue

      March 7, 2013 at 2:38 pm


    • ama

      March 7, 2013 at 8:59 pm

      . As long as you do not hurt your self (anal sex causes hemorrhage and pile ). Orgies threesome are out of limits because the defy the whole essence of the sanctity of the marriage bed.I tell you that a man has been around the block does not mean he has experience. I know a friend and her husband had to go for counseling because the friend being a virgin prior to marriage had expectations and wanted to enjoy and experiment as much as possible. Dude thinking he married a conservative virgin was shocked when she came up with all this unusual(in his mind) demands. such as cunnilingus blow jobs etc. My advice talk about your likes and have proper sexual counseling prior to marriage virgin or no virgin so everyone is clear on each others expectations

    • peace

      March 7, 2013 at 9:52 pm

      …and all was said. thanks for coming!


      March 8, 2013 at 2:06 pm

      lmao @ licking mango nearby….I re-read that line over and over again

  11. aby

    March 7, 2013 at 2:04 pm

    @ Virgins Unite..THANK YOU……………………

  12. missgoodgirl

    March 7, 2013 at 2:05 pm

    IN MY PROFESSIONAL OPINION, anything you can do with a freak, you can do with your wife. i believe that good SEX(include blowjobs, different sex styles, anals etc if your partner permits) is a major factor in keeping your marriage. i for one will get bored quicklyif the only place and the only way my hubby gives is to me is in bed and missionary. sex is a beautiful act that is meant to be enjoyed in every single way. when its time for sex, ladies should drop the good girl attitude along with the clothes on the floor. for me a good woman = brains + morals + freak-in-bed!

  13. msjsbass at

    March 7, 2013 at 2:06 pm

    @jcsgrl: wat on earth has KimK done to make her a bad girl? Nw am seriously gonna vent! She made a mistake for crying out loud and living in a land where opportunities abound for the hardworking ones, she took advantage of it. some say she’s a porn star, if she is a porn star, am sure other videos would leak online. Our leaders and several people in this country are worse than this lady. now some will say she’s my role model but SHE’S NOT! I just feel dat people including Nigerians are hypocritical and judgmental but what abt those who do porn for a living? what do u do?
    Unto Atoke’s article: I think that married couples should be adventurous in sheets cuz dats y God put sex there in d first place. why can’t a wife give her hubby a BJ or the hubby his wife a cunnilingus? God is watching all these boys and not men that says some sexual styles are good and some are bad. How will you even enjoy the sexual life in marriage if either party isn’t open to new ideas in bed? O ga! I rest my case!

    • jcsgrl

      March 7, 2013 at 3:21 pm

      Ok so she’s a good girl? So why is she not your role model? You have made mistakes abi? Her sex tape was not a mistake. why do you ppl keep saying that? She was just following after her bff Paris HIlton. A quick tool to popularity in America for young girls is a sex tape. Kim chose to use that means to propel her to superstardom and it worked for her. I’m not knocking her hustle but all things are expedient but not all things are beneficial. I’m sure if you sit down and ask Kim in the soberest of her moments what she feels about her life, she would not choose the path she’s following. This is what the world is turning into…you point out wrong doing and everyone accuses you of judgement. Sin is Sin! Infact let me start my response in a new post…smh

    • Diseye

      March 7, 2013 at 4:26 pm

      Jcsgrl, bet you’re worse than Kim K. So what proof do you have that the tape scandal was intentional? You sound judgemental. You talk of sin yet you’re clearly judging someone you would never in your dry life know. Get your mind and facts straight. If you hate Kim fine no wahala but stop with the gist about her and her soberest moments…..

    • Joan

      March 7, 2013 at 3:28 pm

      Babe, biko which one is cunnilingus? I’m just inquiring ooo… *adjusts halo*

    • Again

      March 7, 2013 at 3:39 pm

      giving oral sex to the woman.Also know as licking her P*****

  14. Autoprincess

    March 7, 2013 at 2:07 pm

    I was just telling my friend who is getting married soon that after signing those dotted lines, anything she does with her husband (only her husband o, no swinging for me! lol) is acceptable.

    I have been married 7 years and I know that you need to up your ante so that things do not get stale. So blowjobs, fellatio, cowboy/girl style, reverse cowboy/girl, leg on the shoulders, in the sitting room while your toddler sleeps on the couch (kai, Autoprincess you bad sha!!) next to you guys, on the refrigerator in the kitchen, i mean anywhere and anyhow is how we roll. Before them go use blowjob collect husband from person!!! (and yes it happens!).

    • Stacey

      March 11, 2013 at 2:55 pm

      Hey dolls, go to You will learn a lot about sex and different sex positions.

  15. Peachy_mo

    March 7, 2013 at 2:08 pm

    hmmm…I believe marriage preaches sexual satisfaction in any manner (excluding extreme case such as anal…orgy etc) with your spouse. We now have a perfect theory for every cheating man because they expect the plain old missionary style from their wives while the “on-the-road” girl is expected to unleash her potential right? Please! know your hubby ‘well’ and if you’re not married, know your Fiance ” VERY WELL’ so you know his expectation as for me, by August (Insha Allah) my hubby will not even have the energy to look another woman again! because we shall be unleashing potentials and experimenting! oh while we’re at it, please read up:,d.ZWU

    • chioma

      March 7, 2013 at 2:28 pm

      looool orgy kwaaa haaaa dat one no follow for bible and christianity biko ooooo

    • Berry Dakara

      March 7, 2013 at 7:54 pm


      Abeg o, I don’t see how God sanctioned orgy or threesomes within marriage.

    • Omo

      March 7, 2013 at 11:32 pm

      Chroma u sabi read so? Na so una dey fail exams……she said excluding orgies, annals etc……..

  16. Damie

    March 7, 2013 at 2:08 pm

    LOL! Most of the commenters here are such hypocrites. Condemning girls for having sex but not the guys. Anyway, Atoke, this sounds like the Linda Ikeji version of Chika Odua’s: Where the V counts.

    • Autoprincess

      March 7, 2013 at 2:22 pm

      Are you sure you dont need my glasses to read the comments again? Who is condemning anybody here? We are simply discussing the sweetness and wildness of married sex, plain and simple!

    • Damie

      March 7, 2013 at 3:00 pm

      LMAO! Guilty conscience

  17. Jess

    March 7, 2013 at 2:10 pm

    I’m not marred and I know crap all about relationships but I see no reason why ones sex life should not be exciting. Is marriage punishment? Nigerians just tend to be judgmental about the oddest things abeg. Also although I cannot stand Kim K, I do not consider her to be loose because she was in a relationship with most of the men she had sex with. Something a lot people do even in Nigeria so it beats me that people still get all Jenna the judge about the the issue.

  18. Chiomski

    March 7, 2013 at 2:11 pm

    @ Adanne, come on!!! I wonder where the “tutor-husband” ll learn all the moves he ll teach, if he’s a virgin too.

  19. chichi

    March 7, 2013 at 2:11 pm

    more ,more…………….

  20. BeeBaby

    March 7, 2013 at 2:16 pm

    Oya more comments plsssss!hehehehe…….i shall comment anonymously tho.

  21. Lolly

    March 7, 2013 at 2:17 pm

    So blowjob is now wrong in marriage..I laugh hahahahahaha

  22. Azeez Asiwaju

    March 7, 2013 at 2:31 pm

    God has created instincts in us to. There are couples whose sexual lives are not adventurous yet they live happily satisfied till the end. The truth is adventurous sex is not meant for everybody. Sex doesn’t have to be always adventurous, it has to be an agreement between a couple. The fact we’ve tasted more than one d**k or pu**y is what makes our wants insatiable over time. Satisfaction is a thing of the mind, it comes from within. If you like eat your woman’s p***y like never before or suck your man’s d**k incredibly too many times, a cheat will always cheat. It takes self discipline and commitment to be satisfied and committed to our own. So simply put, Kim K. Is a bitch of the first order who doesn’t give a rat ass if she’s being looked up to or not. Trust ♍ε, these kinda people have no peace within ’em that’s why they present themselves recklessly.

    • Bleed blue

      March 7, 2013 at 3:47 pm

      ah ah! Azeez! Pls this is a family show oh…this kain explicit language…making me turn red and tins

    • jenny

      March 7, 2013 at 4:20 pm

      family show? really? so u are allowing ur kids to read this very page with you…yea right…lol

  23. Sparkle

    March 7, 2013 at 2:46 pm

    @Adanne hehehe… Don’t be ridiculous girl! Your husband would teach you all you need to know?
    Where’s he supposed to learn them from??? LOL
    @Virgins unite, I like your point of view.

  24. IM

    March 7, 2013 at 2:50 pm

    he who is without sin should cast the first stone…You people should leave KimK alone oooo..Let God judge her as He’d judge us all when the time comes. we say we hate her but just love to talk about her, making her more popular…#EnuffSaidOnThisIssue….

    As for being kinky with your husband…I’m a 28yrs old virgin waiting to UNLEASH on my husband…There’d be no time at all for him to consider looking for a freak outside our home..he’d be too busy researching how to handle me :D…

    • omoibo

      March 7, 2013 at 3:32 pm

      Correct babe, that’s the attitude 😉 a can do kinda attitude 😀

    • Partyrider

      March 7, 2013 at 6:46 pm

      Lool..nice one 😀

  25. Zayt

    March 7, 2013 at 2:51 pm

    hahahahaha loving the comments!
    totally agree with virgins unite! alot of hypocrisy going on.
    have a friend that used to do ‘bad things’ wt his gf, but once she became his wife, he stopped. restricted the sex to missionary and cowgirl only. reason being he cant b ‘doing’ crazy positions with the mother of his children when its not like she’s a whore! imagine. i was speechless!!! like seriosly how is enjoying and exploring sexual positions with ur wife disrespectful! anyways to each his own. Atoke thanks for the article! very interesting!

  26. Tolani

    March 7, 2013 at 3:00 pm

    In my head I am freaky. I imagine having a secret bedroom where my partner and I do a lot of unprintable. I imagine role playing, I imagine acting out all I read and watch. Forget I don’t have the experience now, cos I want to wait until I am married. Will I be of loose morals if I decide to practise my sexual proclivities when I am married? I beg to disagree. As long as my man and I agree and my aging bones don’t disappoint I am ready for anything.

    • Neo

      March 7, 2013 at 3:35 pm

      Hahahahahahahahahaha. If i didnt know you ehn, it would be a different matter. But now i think about it u’d be a dark horse of some sort. Hmmmn, i know ya type!

  27. Bella

    March 7, 2013 at 3:13 pm

    OMW, Adanne, are you serious? Felatio is now a sin with the man you married, NO wonder nigerian man are promiscous, it is because of the likes of you, why wont you please your husband sexually! so you don ‘t like it when he goes down on you either? I pity you hey. Ladies, do what ever position you are COMFORTABLE with, with your man to lessen the chance of him coming to the streets for pleasure. Its in the confines of your home. Staying a virgin is a personal choice, and as for him teaching you – gosh you are not serious! you are both supposed to learn , read, watch and listen to your needs and what you both need to do. I cannot believe that in 2013 we still have such cob web mind sets. I really hope you are not married, for if you are, and you are not blowing your man, you better hope that he is not getting blown elsewhere and that you are staying cleer of it cause of your choice and not his. Men are freaks and they want their wives to be equally freaks and not nuns in the bedroom!

    • Annoyed female

      March 7, 2013 at 11:51 pm

      Bella comments like yours make me so annoyed I wish I could slap you……how did u get this stupid? Nigerian men are now promiscuous because their women deny them sex abi? Men especially African men are promiscuous because society has groomed them so….they have been programmed to think they can have many wives the same way Islam gives the northern men the effrontery to be adulterous cos they are allowed to marry 4 wives….whether university Ur husband sex 24/7 he will find a reason to cheat if he wants……sex in marriage is meant to please both parties and keep the fire burning…’s mindset like yours that keeps the woman in bondage giving all her life to make a marriage work while the man just sits there and not look for ways to bring his best to the table….the bible says men should love their wives like he loves the church…….do u know the responsibility of love? It’s hard work of forgiving, selfless service etc yet society just make comments like yours and do not allow the men take responsibility for making their marriages work……most men cheat cos most of them have no discipline and see women as just sex objects, some cos they are men and can do what they like……a man commits adultery and he gets a pat on the back but a woman does same and she is treated as trash….a lot of women put all in the marriage and yes even sex when in demand yet their husbands cheat, so pls get that tot out of Ur mind……men cheat cos they want to the sex life is just dia stupid excuse.

    • Annoyed female

      March 7, 2013 at 11:56 pm

      Sorry typo #..whether u give ur husband sex 24/7 #

  28. eniola

    March 7, 2013 at 3:15 pm

    As for me, i don’t think there’s anything wrong in been sexually adventurous after marriage, if u wont be, then you are the reason he went to get ”some” outside. Yet, i think we should all know that there are possible diseases incurred from blow-jobs *69* so get adventurous, do some other sexual practices to excite your partner to make thoughts of every moment linger on*winks*

    • Idak

      March 7, 2013 at 6:13 pm

      Let the records reflect that there is an inaccuracy in your comment.
      There are possible diseases that can be gotten from any form of sex if any of the partners is unfaithful. Whatever diseases you infer to are not exclusive to oral sex and will obviously not be present if the partners are faithful and truly monogamous.
      May the records also reflect that oral sex, Fellatio or Cunnilingus or as a combination in 69 are inherently Godly in a marital bed.
      Thank you 🙂

    • Jamce

      March 9, 2013 at 7:34 pm

      Am not saying you are right or wrong on oral sex being Godly. But could you please refer us to the Bible passage that says it is Godly? Please permissiveness does not mean it is sanctioned. As we preach sexual liberation in marriage, let us also put the issues in their proper context so that people are not misled.

  29. Bella

    March 7, 2013 at 3:16 pm

    @Tolani – The pain room in Christian Grey’s penthouse! kwaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa. Now personally that is way too freaky for me but hell, I will keep that ish in our bordeux. Most of the comments here are definitely on point, for those that are still hating on Kim, seriously get your own life. This is 2013, it was a leaked sex tape, not murder! Gosh

  30. annamarie

    March 7, 2013 at 3:19 pm

    Lol nawa oh
    My husby to b is in deep shit……..he better know it all oh

  31. 'Mide

    March 7, 2013 at 3:23 pm

    nah no shit for inside honey comb o…..we go practice am together till we tire each other ni o!

  32. Right!

    March 7, 2013 at 3:24 pm

    Azzez Asiwaju has said it all: how good one is between the sheets is no guarantee against infidelity. A Spouse who will cheat will cheat, irrespective of your Phd in sexual affairs. I believe everyone should strive to do what makes them comfortable with their partners- no need to castigate people who dont subscribe to your sexual preferences. To each his own.

    • Idak

      March 7, 2013 at 5:41 pm

      God bless you. As a man, i have argued this point to my married and dating female friends. Stop developing migraines over why men cheat. Develop a healthy sex live for your enjoyment and your partners enjoyment too. Men/women that will cheat will cheat and in most situations, the cheat does not even know why he or she is cheating and can not advance how they will stop the act. It is often spiritual, cultural or plain greed. All those excuses of inadequacy in their monogamous relationships are blackmail tools. Just do your best (that entails your own enjoyment) and leave the rest to God.

    • Shapiro

      March 8, 2013 at 12:03 am

      Idakwo I could kiss u right now…… so sick of women especially blaming cheating hubby’s on the sex life… will cheat if they want too……women now cheat cos they are tired of working the marriage alone. If u deny Ur wife sex too long she will look for a way out…..truth be told the percent of men who cheat are more and it’s not cos wives don’t give them good sex…agreed some women don’t give good sex, respect etc but I can bet my royal arse that 99 percent of those who do just do it for other reasons….

  33. Madam the Madam

    March 7, 2013 at 3:24 pm

    I wish more men would comment on this article. Great post, Atoke. I’ve met a few guys who stated that they wouldn’t do certain things with the mother of thier kids, which I think is beyond silly. If you’re not bringing out her inner freak, then who will? These same men will now go and find one small girlfriend on the side to be doing the nonsense with. Smh.

    • Ready

      March 8, 2013 at 3:00 pm

      O tan. And it’s not about “women must, women should” me, it’s about challenging beliefs. Who said it’s not okay to do that to your wife? It’s fine if those men find ways to suppress those urges, but if you still want those certain things in your sex life but won’t do it with your wife, who will do them? Why should you decide you can’t do this to your wife because “it’s wrong” but having a mistress/girlfriend/prostitute is okay? O ga o.

  34. Joan

    March 7, 2013 at 3:26 pm

    This is actually the first time I’m seeing some serious sex talk on BN, and I like it. Everybody talk ya own make we dey learn lol
    As for the babe that said giving your husband a blowjob is a sin, issorait. Wait till it is the house girl that is giving it to him then you can come back and post another comment here. Msccheewww! 🙂

  35. Yetunde

    March 7, 2013 at 3:29 pm

    THese comments are too hilarious…. wow so blow jobs are part of ‘the bad sex styles’ hahaha… ever heard guys discussing about sex?? if you have, then you’ll know exactly what to do in bed with your ‘MAN’! BYE.

  36. omoibo

    March 7, 2013 at 3:31 pm

    I have always said that Nigerians are the BIGGEST HYPOCRITES ever, always forming their holier than thou attitude!
    Sure, a female can be woman in the streets & be the biggest freak in the sheets, so can I a guy be a gentleman in the streets & freak the ish out of my woman behind closed doors (there is a time & place for everything). If giving a head to my chic & licking her is what gets her off then you better believe I will munch & lick away & if that’s what gets me off aslo she better get to giving me a damn BJ and if she doesn’t know how to I will teach her. A lot of times we as a culture are so darn up freaking tight when comes to sexuality it is not even funny.

  37. jcsgrl

    March 7, 2013 at 3:35 pm

    @ all of you calling me judgmental and holy nweje. This is the problem we’re having in christiandom today. Whenever someone points out wrongdoing in another, you get response of judge not, you’re not perfect, blah blah blah. No one is saying we’re perfect but sin is sin. You have someone who deliberately created sex tape and leaked it for popularity and you sit here and tell me it was a mistake. OH please! She changes men like she changes underwear. Marries and divorces at the drop of a dime. Glorifies sex sex in every picture you see of her and you tell me she’s not morally loose. Pls my bros and sis dont be deceived. Wrong is Wrong! Can God turn around a bad situation for good? Oh yes. Kim has managed to turn hers around and exploit it. Yes I said it! She’s exploiting her sexuality even more to make money and you guys come here and preach she’s morally sound. wow! The world is really turning to an end. what happens to repentance? Change of heart and attitude. Disassociation from sin? Denouncing of evil deeds? Has she done any of that? She poses nude at any given instance. Where have you seen her going around to educate young women to abhor the route she went? Well you all may keep looking up to her but as for me and my household, she’s no role model and I will continue to educate young girls and boys anywhere that Kim K is morally loose and not one to emulate. I can only pray that she comes to the realization of her sins, repents and receives God’s forgiveness just like I pray to God everyday for my own sins and do my best to abscond. I will not be bullied into keeping quiet either for speaking the truth!

    • Madam the Madam

      March 7, 2013 at 3:51 pm

      Look at this clown writing epistle about Kim K like she gives a damn about people like you who love to sit in glass houses and throw stones. All you extra judgmental Christians are just annoying. Abeg go and focus on how you will make heaven and don’t be so concerned about Kim’s life cos trust that she doesn’t give any kind of hoot about hours. Shuooo

    • Again

      March 7, 2013 at 4:11 pm

      biko what’s wrong with glorifying sex.

    • 5'5

      March 7, 2013 at 4:42 pm

      and as usual, to all nigerians, only sexual sin is sin.

    • Omoba

      March 7, 2013 at 6:33 pm

      My dear! I tire for the matter o

    • Magz

      March 8, 2013 at 2:16 pm

      for this comment, may God bless u. the jcsgirl talking may be a confirmed gossip or liar or thief o but since it’s not sexual sin, she doesn’t see it as sin

    • Milola

      March 7, 2013 at 4:55 pm

      And for some reason, you think everyone is a christian? Get your head out of your ass girl. There are over 200 religions in the world and millions of people have no religious inclination. We do not care about religion. Deal with it and go and sort out your issues with christiandom.

    • peace

      March 7, 2013 at 10:02 pm

      !She poses nude? since when is a bikini nude? you my dear need to open up your mind. The world is a beautiful place outside your church and I am sure no one is saying Kim is perfect. But unless you can tell me you where there when she decided to have sex an release a tape…then you cant speak? ok. now go and do missionary with your husband.

    • Shapiro

      March 8, 2013 at 12:11 am

      Shut Ur sanctimonious mouth and go for night vigil……I wish I knew Ur identity na me go dig Ur yansh commotion…next u will claim you are now a matiyr like Jesus Christ cos u r being persecuted for preaching the gospel…..abeg just commot make we see road oh….

    • jcsgrl

      March 8, 2013 at 2:00 pm

      Shapiro ha ha ha ha ha catch me if you can. I went to night vigil and mid week and I prayed for you all.
      Holy Ghost Fire! Holy Ghost Fire!

    • jcsgrl

      March 8, 2013 at 2:13 pm

      But the fearful, and unbelieving, and the abominable, and murderers, and whoremongers, and sorcerers, and idolaters, and all liars, shall have their part in the lake which burneth with fire and brimstone: which is the second death OF WHICH KIM K, YOU AND I WILL FIND OURSELVES IF WE DON’T REPENT!!! I WILL SAY IT HERE SO THAT ON THAT DAY YOU WILL NOT HAVE EXCUSE. A WORD IS ENOUGH FOR THE WISE

    • Atoke

      March 8, 2013 at 2:24 pm

      Oya, Aunty! We’ve heard na! E sinmi agbaja! 😀

    • Rachael

      March 8, 2013 at 5:24 pm

      Please go take a chill pill.

    • zsa zsa

      March 9, 2013 at 8:42 am

      madam just give it up already. You seriously cannot keep carrying this Kim K issue in your head. typing everywhere that she is morally loose is not going to change anything. I no send the Kim K chic but she doesn’t bother me. And stop with the “role model” chant abeg. Who told you Kim K herself wants to be anyones role model. We tend to just give titles to people who are not even seeking them, every small thing na “role model”. I don’t have a role model, i learn what i can from different people and thats it. Stop looking to others to be role models, be your own role model, be your children’s role model.

    • Jamce

      March 9, 2013 at 7:43 pm

      Am not saying you are right or wrong on oral sex being Godly. But could you please refer us to the Bible passage that says it is Godly? Please permissiveness does not mean it is sanctioned. As we preach sexual liberation in marriage, let us also put the issues in their proper context so that people are not misled.

  38. giggy

    March 7, 2013 at 3:37 pm

    @IM, u have kii”ed me o lol 🙂

  39. Retrochic

    March 7, 2013 at 3:37 pm

    i was talking to someone one time on why pple cheat, and he said something that hit me, pple are not content, abeg sex is a beautiful thing buh it is nt everything, pple act like as if without it relationships cant be possible, and we fail to remember that even a hot freak, can keep or save a rlship, that’s to show us that it is nt impt as we think it is, dnt get me wrong sex is beautiful, buh it shudnt be enuf reason, for couples 2 cheat on each other, it just points out that we are never content.

  40. Deee

    March 7, 2013 at 3:55 pm

    You are the hypocrite, if a Nigerian woman was still legally married and pregnant with another man’s child you would be the same people to crucify her. So i have no problem with Kim’s sex tape but she’s still married and openly dating another man and even pregnant. biko, the likes of Tonto you people insult everyday haven’t even done anything on that level.
    As for sex with my hubby, o boy i can’t marry any prude. When we’re in bed anything goes as long as it doesn’t involve a 3rd party.I want it all, handcuffs, plenty oral, swings in the bedroom, stripper pole, role playing and all the other wonderful things. At the end of the day i’ll still make heaven, God created sex and there is nothing sinful about enjoying each other in different ways.

    • Again

      March 7, 2013 at 4:08 pm

      circumstances are different. The ex-husband is dragging out the divorce. Meanwhile doctors are telling her she would have a hard time getting pregnant. Now what’s a girl to do. Watch her eggs dry up while the ex drags everything out. plus let’s assume she got pregnant by mistake….I thought we godly folks are against abortion. so would you rather she aborted the pregnancy to avoid having a baby with another man while technically married?

    • jenny

      March 7, 2013 at 4:21 pm

      family show? really? so u are allowing ur kids to read this very page with you…yea right…lol

    • jenny

      March 7, 2013 at 4:25 pm

      Really? so you agree to getting pregnant for another man less than a year after divorce…First of all Nigerians have always frowned at having children out of wedlock, Secondly, Nigerians always suggest waiting for a while after divorce, most times they would even suggest you return back to ur husband, because they do not support divorce. There is definitely double standard.
      Since when does someone who takes picture with Kanye West holding her bare breast become a role model, role model for wat? breast grabbing?

    • Diseye

      March 7, 2013 at 4:36 pm

      Gbam! You’ve said it all. Leave jcsgirl to go for midweek service and stop misyarning

    • Again

      March 7, 2013 at 4:59 pm

      Jenny stop living your life by what “Nigerians” say and just live your life already. Nigerians say this Nigerians say that.some Nigerians say return to an abusive cheating husband b/c we hate divorce. Some NIgerians say leave such a man. sista just do y0u and please God. the rest na jara

  41. meah

    March 7, 2013 at 3:55 pm

    @jcsgrl: I looove your attitude! Everyone should stick to what they believe in alright. Like someone said, to each his own. But i respect anyone who speaks the truth as they believe it, even if their voice shakes.

  42. Tae

    March 7, 2013 at 4:28 pm

    Thank you jare, don’t mind them. If it was Toke or Tonto that is still legally married and dating another man talk-less of pregnant they would have told us how she’s going to hell fire. Which circumstances are different, do you know the personal circumstances of the other women you judge. So what if he’s dragging the case, is a year too long for a woman to stay single and think of her life? why should she be sleeping around even before her divorce comes through? Please give me a break about eggs, this is 2013 where eggs can be frozen till she gets her divorce and does things in the right manner.She is a woman with enough money to keep her eggs till when she’s legally divorced and then she can go ahead and get remarried and pregnant. You are morally bankrupt if you think it is ok to bring a child into the world in such a manner! The worst part is , its your type that will be insulting Nigerian woman who would never be so shameless as to do even half of that. What about the recent magazine photo shoot with Kanye where he had his hand around her naked breast? That one is a past mistake also abi, o her nudity clock is also ticking? Abeg

  43. anonymous

    March 7, 2013 at 4:29 pm

    @virgin unite . . . .lovely post thumbs up

  44. nnenne

    March 7, 2013 at 4:29 pm

    rotfl….. u gotta love BN. too many hilarious and serious comments here. biko as long as sex is in the confines of marriage, there should be no boundaries!!!

  45. Bee

    March 7, 2013 at 4:31 pm

    The comments ehn, geez. PG is needed bella biko, my niece comes to this site often, before she’ll be asking me Aunti Bee, what is cunninglingus. I will just die. We are so close, she tells me stuff she can’t tell my sister (their relationship is story for another day). So my comment. I haven’t had sex, not becuase I’m “saving” myself for my hsuband. That’s BS, in my opinion, because the guy is most likely not to be a virgin too, so what kind of unfair equation is that? Women, we put too much pressure on ourselves. This is 2013, no one gives a shit. If you marry a virgin, and your husband is not, in fact, you don unequally yoke with the devil be that, or whatever bla bla bla, you gba Jesu’s say. I’m not a Christian, so y’all gba Jesu’s should please back off. If my niece asks me today, Aunty why havent you done the do. My answer will be, maintaining a relationship goes way more than sex. It is easy to take your clothes off, it doesnt mean you guys are connecting. Those who have broken up or gotten divorced, I’m sure a lot of them had great sex. What happens outside the bedroom is what counts. I want the guy to consciously make an effort to love me and connect with me outside of sex, discover me, find out who I am, without taking my clothes off, and vice versa. Does that make me a woman of good morals? I laugh in French. Do I think other women, should emulate me. Shu, why na. If you want to do the do, carry go. I will not accuse you of being loose. Like my friend says, the vaj no get meter. To all the women who think, if you are not doing so so and so, he must be getting it outside, mehn, that analogy is why men think they have the license to cheat. It is not you that makes him cheat. He will cheat if he wants to, if you like screw him under water on on the ceiling. If you guys have a strong connection, he will let you ease into what he likes, and you’ll tell him what you don’t like or are not comfortable with. That doesn’t mean it wont change tomorrow and you won’t be amenable to doing it. It is not sex that keeps a man ooooo, women give yourself a break. I heard my cousin say to his wife after their first child, she will never go through labour again, and she was arguing. No o, it is her duty, she must, bla bla bla. He said, he can’t watch the woman he loves go through that much pain, it will kill him to put her through that again. Once is enough. So a man that really loves you, will not make you do jack you don’t like just to please him, because it is your duty as his wife. It doesnt automatically mean that he will cheat. Women erase that mentality. If you married a dog sha, if you like memorise fifty Shades of grey, word for word, he will still find a woman who go do pass Anna.

    • Again

      March 7, 2013 at 4:37 pm

      i like your reasons for wanting to stay a virgin till marriage, but other peoples’s reasons are no less valid, you know. live and let live

    • Damsel

      March 7, 2013 at 4:46 pm

      GBAM! Too correct. I am not a virgin. Why? Because I love sex. I do not think it is a duty or something to “keep” my man. I do it because I enjoy it and it makes me happy. Apparently, this makes me a slut according to some of you. Lmao. I take am like that.

    • Pd

      March 7, 2013 at 11:01 pm


    • ok

      March 7, 2013 at 5:44 pm

      true talk

    • Idak

      March 7, 2013 at 5:58 pm

      I read most of your post and i share your sentiments. My outlook is solidly Christian based and Christ influenced but i still see your point. While i belonged to the virginity club until marriage, i’ve never judged persons based on that and did not go out looking for a virgin to marry. I often think the whole virgin debate is skewed and often hypocritical. I do not think banging people with bibles will aid the whole virgin brigade thing. What i think will help is reevaluating the whole concept of sex and redefining it as an art and not just an act.

    • sweets

      March 7, 2013 at 6:51 pm

      havent hard sex but knows d correct spellin 4 cunnilingus na so , guess porn nd fingerin na ur best frend .

    • Rolli

      March 7, 2013 at 7:12 pm

      Aunty, if you know how to read, many comments above wrote it out. All you need to do is copy and paste. Kai, some illiterates here hen. I tire.

    • Idak

      March 7, 2013 at 7:58 pm

      seems you don’t know that Google works for both virgins and disvirgined.

    • Partyrider

      March 7, 2013 at 10:03 pm

      Looool @ Idak

    • Annie

      March 8, 2013 at 1:29 pm

      “hard”, “d”, “spellin”, etc…
      Oh the delicious irony!!! Hahahahahahaha 😀

  46. Diseye

    March 7, 2013 at 4:34 pm

    So what makes you think we are all Christians here? Go to a christian blog and air your views o jare. is Kim K the only celeb that has posed nude? Like you have not used your feminine wiles to get grades in school or avoid paying complete bus fare. Leave this post and go for midweek service my friend!

  47. Aperson

    March 7, 2013 at 4:40 pm

    You ppl, Kim Kardashian does not sit well in any decent persons books because she has a sex tape. To be fair, she was in a committed relationship and can do whatever she pleases as a concenting adult. However, Kim equates her worth and has a habit of revolving her life around men. THAT is the issue with Kim Kardashian. She may be a really nice lady, but she needs to try and stay on her own for a while and chill on all these men she lets rent her box every couple of months.

  48. Aperson

    March 7, 2013 at 4:42 pm

    And yes, Kim doesnt give a toss about us Nigerians. She showed you lot that when she came for 30 mins and left with 500,000 k dollars (how obscene though). So yes, lets just allow the woman lol

  49. nich

    March 7, 2013 at 4:44 pm

    B4 i was not a believer of oral sex not until i came to the states………….i also thought it was a cultural thing and had little pleasure to add to sex….but i was totally wrong……

    as guys and men most of us because of religious ideology and as nigerians many of us are afraid to tell a girl friend or wife to be we love blow job for the fear of rejection….and you may not want to loose someone that you have come a long way with because she does not like to give a blow job……..

    when a man wants a wife he thinks of humility first……….why………because this is the factor that will always make him to be in charge or atleast make him to believe so……..but at the same time the man thinks about sex…… believe is that if most women give their husbands blow jobs…..the man will come running home. the truth is that most times the man will not get it from his wife and then he thinks of the street girl who wants just money………..the strret girl also has the capability to be somebody’s wife but chooses not to for some reasons.

    if proper hygiene comes before blow job…….findings reveal that it has not been causing diseases or cancer as many other camps claim…………felacio is very pleasurable but i have missed feelings about it because one may begin to think of certain bacteria……and anal sex some camps claim can cause rectal dysfunction………..

    you girls are righly on point and i envy ur boyfriends or husbands…because i believe it is safer and to find pleasure in your home than outside. someone says marry your friend so it would be easy to discuss opnly and thats my take…..

    sex has the power to keep a man home

  50. miss julz

    March 7, 2013 at 4:48 pm

    OK, so my darling husband of whom i am happily married to is extremely grateful he married a freak o, omg, we do it everywhere do-able! (in the changing room of our reception venue) in every style( on the toilet sit, under the shower, back on a car)i dnt know about you o, but omo, we already knew our potential before we marry and that dint mean we both where loose, we have built trust based on alot of other things! and trust me, my marriage is rock solid! i married a man who says am his ride and die babe(bonnie and Clyde style) even if we no do bella naija style wedding because we no get money. as for you hypocrites, continue to be judging Kim u hia, the kingdom of God would soon come and pass you bye. dont give your husband blow job o, those girls go help you!they help the less privileged women!

    • Idak

      March 7, 2013 at 5:47 pm

      As much as i admire the fun you and your man are having, i still state that it is no barrier to him banging outside. I have seen men who had more fun at home than yours is having and they still banged outside on a regular basis and some even have offsprings as fruits of their evil acts. I make bold to say that the reason for the ‘solidity’ of your marriage goes beyond kinky sex.

    • Laide

      March 8, 2013 at 2:34 am

      Thank you very much….don’t understand y women think sex is entirely what makes their marriage.

  51. salsera

    March 7, 2013 at 4:49 pm

    @jcsgrl oh please – look at pot calling kettle, did kimk tell you she was christian. So whats is your own there, no b sinner u be before you come to christ. u come reach there finish na to dey hurl stone at another woman instead of you to be humble. Mshew – they will soon expose your own – heck its already exposed all over BN

  52. nich

    March 7, 2013 at 4:49 pm

    on kim……i believe it is more of american culture to take nude photos or make sex tapes…… is the life she has chosen to live.

    • O dear

      March 7, 2013 at 5:09 pm

      It’s not American culture oooo. much like 419 is not Nigerian culture

  53. Coco

    March 7, 2013 at 5:01 pm

    @Bee, double gbam and thumbs up!! One of the only people who has said anything sensible here! I reserve my comments because it is an arduous and futile task to try to change a man’s opinion (especially over social media).. On a final note, the “do’s and dont’s” between a man and wife are theirs to decide according to their preferences and not for the world to decide. So to each man his own cup of zobo! kapeesh!

  54. Na wa

    March 7, 2013 at 5:04 pm

    If only many things people do behind their closed doors could be unveiled,then people will leave kim kardashian alone..ehn.
    I believe variety is the spice of life,if you are thinking only missionary position is all you know about,you are loosing your husband poco a poco…

    • Shapiro

      March 8, 2013 at 12:24 am

      Na wa, U make me Laff wella….the day Ur hubby eventually cheats on you come back and tell us all u did wrong before he cheated……then we will know if its because u don’t give him enough fooling urself as if its only sex that causes a man to cheat…..

  55. Bee

    March 7, 2013 at 5:11 pm

    Mehn I wish Toke, Karen, Susan Peters, Toolz, Goldie, Chika Ike, Tonto had voltrons like this. Hilarity of the highest order reading some people’s voltronic comments. I read one “the circumstances are different”. I nearly choked on my tea. You would have thought the person was her mom. The ones in our backyard, we will be quick to slay, rather than support, and defend, and find reasons for. I remember when people were on Goldie’s case because Prezzo was supposedly married or something like that. Kai, I felt bad for the girls mother. I sit back sipping my tea and reading more comments. Some amazing PR people on here. Toke should kuku pay you guys I swear. With your voltron skills, she’ll be more loved than Omotola or genny by the time you are done

  56. buky

    March 7, 2013 at 5:14 pm

    @Azeez who re u to kal anyone loose, sumone u most likely haven’t met in ur entire life. Anyway, any style within marriage is legal as far as its a mutual tin shikena.

  57. Goldie

    March 7, 2013 at 5:17 pm

    is he nt my husband if i cant b a galfriend, mistress, sugardaughter or sister……..if i cannot b everything to him in bed nd out he shld him park well. if he is a virgin nd i am thanks God for internet. As for Kim k WEN U FINISH HITTING UR HEADS SHE IS MAKING HER MONEY WHEREVA SHE IS. UR OPINION DONT COUNT. All i can say is LIVE UR LIFE THE WAY U KNOW BEST

  58. ANON

    March 7, 2013 at 5:17 pm

    but why is everyone listing sex styles and excluding ‘anal’? like some of y’all aren’t intrigued by it and haven’t tried it out sef…lol.

    • Autoprincess

      March 8, 2013 at 10:03 am

      lol. Dat one get as e be! While I will not condemn others for trying it, I don’t think I am that adventurious…YET. Never say never!

  59. vee

    March 7, 2013 at 5:37 pm

    Its ok for everyone to say what on their minds..but im pregnant with my second baby..very ill and cannot eat,im so thin in pregnancy,i cannot look in a hubby wants it too often,i try to keep up but its a lot of work n pain and i keep telling him i av no hes pissed and says he will get a girlfriend..i felt so bad..i can hardly eat everyday..i cannot even drink milk or milo..just a lttle juice then fruit.He knows how we used to be before pregnancy but now im just 3mths preg..dont docs say we should take it cool in the first trimester?

    • Yourhubby

      March 7, 2013 at 6:50 pm

      tell your hubby he’s being a jerk

    • vee

      March 7, 2013 at 7:46 pm

      I read in some old books how when a woman is pregnant..ur hubby gives u time esp for the foetus to form before serious sex right?our men these days dont wanna hear..whats it with them sef?o ga o as if making a baby isnt important as well..for me after this second more kids otito..ive had alot of ex in this pregnancy sometime i double over and try to compose myself..sometimes i feel i wanna run away cos whats so so important about sex esp when ur partner isnt feeling throwing up all day..yet u wanna hump me at nite..four nites every week..its not fair.i do hope his sisters are having hell in their marriages too..God forgive me

    • Yourhubby

      March 7, 2013 at 9:34 pm

      Vee, as for your statement about staying away from sex to allow the foetus to form, No not right. There’s no need to avoid sex during pregnancy unless in situations like yours were you’re just worn out and not enjoying it. Or if the doctor specifically says to avoid for some medical reason (can’t think of any reason right now though but always want to give priority to taking your doctor’s advice)

    • na me na

      March 7, 2013 at 7:49 pm

      ur husband is sooo wicked…hmm, girlfriend? stoorry!whether u gree or not, he’ll do if he’ll do. babes, take care of urslf nd dont let him wear u out to d pt of losing ur preg…now, dts a very slfish person

    • Rolli

      March 7, 2013 at 7:56 pm

      Wait Vee, he actually said that to you. He threatened you that he will get a girlfriend. I’m so sorry darling, I really am. Maybe you should tell him he vowed to love, honour, cherish for better for worse. Also tell him he didn’t make vows to your vjj o, and tell him that cheating on a spouse is not just to the spouse alone. If he cheats on you, he is also cheating on your child and your unborn child too. He is betraying his family. He should think of that, if he ever thinks of hooking up with another woman. When he’s done kissing her, and doing gbobgo e, he should not take his bath or wash his mouth o, he should come home, hug your 1st child, and kiss him/her on the lips. Paint that picture for him well. If it doesn’t help my dear, there’s nothing you can do. If he wants you to miscarry and put your life and your baby’s life at risk, he should be ready to explain to your firstborn why mummy is in the hospital.

    • Idak

      March 7, 2013 at 8:00 pm

      I’ll tell you this as a brother, tell him to go right ahead and get a girlfriend as he wishes. You are married to a selfish, greedy and inconsiderate fellow.
      If you don’t consider your health and your baby, you’ll die in the act one day and he will move right along.
      How does he even enjoy the act with an unwilling partner?
      Some of these men need help.

    • Pd

      March 7, 2013 at 11:06 pm

      My dear! If he like make he carry ogbeke…..just make he does hiv test before he touches you again or better still…..tell him to use a condom with gf! No kill yourself because you want to satisfy your husband oh! Just try and relax and pray for good health to carry your pregancy to full time! He dey use babe threaten you…..i laugh in japanese…..tell him no be today!

    • Inosendanybody.....

      March 8, 2013 at 12:47 am

      Fee Ur hubby is just looking for excuses and if am not mistaken has cheated before……sex can happen in pregnancy at any stage for some women but some doctors advise otherwise cos of the health history of some women……bAbe trust me, no worry urself….u will not risk your life cos of his high libido….make e waka heaven shall not fall just pray he does not bring disease….no man is indispensable so don’t let him blackmail u emotionally with threat of another girlfriend…sorry to be this blunt but some men are just self centered and believe they can do whatever they like….if u love a woman u won’t say that kind of rubbish when she is pregnant….

  60. the ones calling others hypocrites are actually hypocrites too

    March 7, 2013 at 5:44 pm

    huh? Im a Kim K fan ..i Love her business skill…but even the Americans know she has no morals come on!….its not event the sex tape thats the issue cos as far as im concerned what is good for the goose is good for the gander…..she has posed nude for playboy …and she is still married to her ex while pregnant for Kanye west!…which under california law ..if they do not divorce ..her husband can claim Kanyes Child as his child…allows Kanye grab her breast on a magazine shoot, which they are not married….. I mean even Kims sister Kourtney told her that if anything were to happen to her she would make Khloe the guardian of her children than Kim….please lets stop pretending …how many of us would admire the Likes of Cossy Orjiakor?…all cossy needs is a good stylist and a show ..and shes made ..lets be real and she is set…then again Nigerians worship money lon as you making money …yo do no wron to them..also i think while most of you are defending her is because she dates black men and she has style……if not what seperates her from Coco, Kendra and the rest.smh….I like her cos i believe in looking at the positives of people like her business skill…but please she is loose….

    • jenny

      March 7, 2013 at 9:39 pm

      So far, of all the comments I have read (I have not read all ooo, but I have read a lot), yours makes the most sense….Lets call a spade a spade if we must call it anything at all. I wont say Kim is a whore, but saying she is a role model when we are not referring to her business acumen has no foundation what so ever…. Even Americans know it, But even that business acumen, I dont think I want that type, where she does a marriage most especially for the money she can gain…. Good enough, but no thank you…lol

    • Mary amaka

      March 8, 2013 at 12:59 am

      It is amazing how ple like u Jenny just open Ur mouths……who called Kim a role model and who is saying everything she does is right? I sure am not one of those who will idolize someone cos they r oyibos but nobody should come and tell us she is loose cos she did a sex tape……that is the argument, so before u ple come here and open Ur sanctimonious mouths learn to read well, assimilate, understand what u have read and even get a dictionary if u don’t understand the grammar before u come and rant here……the writer of the article said he asked ple exactly what made them call Kim a loose woman, na sister holy holy with her over religious and pious self start the argument….

  61. smiley

    March 7, 2013 at 5:59 pm

    pLs keep th.e comment rollling so we that are learner can use dis medium to learn how to dig it right with our hubby

  62. Mimi

    March 7, 2013 at 6:03 pm

    mehn this right here is the highlights of my day, LWKMD!!!

  63. onyi

    March 7, 2013 at 6:05 pm

    Its amazing how people still think like cavemen and as though we’re still in the primeval times. So many hypocrites, am sure some people say something and do otherwise. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with trying any position with your partner as long as your both comfortable with it. You and married and commited to him so you can’t go wrong. The same thing everytime makes it boring. Explore your options.

  64. tinu

    March 7, 2013 at 6:13 pm

    Kim isn’t my role model..cos we ve different values and morals,you can also say all these artists and actresses all have loose morals eg JLo or do you know she leaked the sex tape herself?were we there when they were having sex or when they leaked it?just because noone knows our dirty little secrets doesn’t make us saints one point or the other we have acted like people with loose morals,we only ask God for mercy and grace not to repeat them.everyone makes mistakes so let’s all stop acting like we are better than the next.

    Every marriage is different cos of our different personalities,the only things that we share is Love,respect and friendship..if you feel having a blowjob is disrespectful to you..that’s how you want your marriage to be.I believe in having an healty sex life with ur spouse one which you can grow in love and respect for eachother..

  65. oyin

    March 7, 2013 at 6:32 pm

    Comments here are hilarious @tolani nice one obviously you have been doing some christian grey, @virginity unite God bless you, @ azzeez abeg park well dont be 1955 with us here, @autoprincess which one is cowgirl again, I need to up my game mehn.

  66. anon

    March 7, 2013 at 6:43 pm

    Y’all should be honest with yourselves Kim K is MORALLY LOOSE haba from Tito Jackson to Miles Austin to John Mayor to Reggie Bush to Nick Cannon to Ray J to Damon Thomas to Kanye West to Chris Humphries to Shengo Dean the list goes on… posing nude in play boy … sex tape… the girl lacks self control if you think she is not loose perhaps your list is longer than hers!!!!

    • Jeje

      March 8, 2013 at 1:04 am

      Then some of our nigerian actresses are morally loose cos we have some that have been linked to various men…..since we don’t know the number of men u have slept with in Ur life we don’t know if to add u on the list or not…..mssthhheeeeeewwww…

  67. Mr.MAN

    March 7, 2013 at 6:47 pm

    DEPENDS ON THE BABE- mehn naija guys dont like babes who are already freaky- wtf, We should grow together in our freak level. I dont want to meet a babe and shes already taking “D” in the nyansh, drinking cum and all sorts of crazy tings. – that shhh scares me but if its MY “side GF” yes it ok. lol. Im a guy I like all types of crazy things but not for my wife to be doing. Imagine how can I nutt in my wife’s mouth, mother of my children? I like to bite and be bitten, I dont want to hurt my wife tho. lol, When having sex, some guys like to choke their babe, How can I choke my sweet wife? Some guys like it rough and crazy, but not with their wife. I like threesome- with two babes but I cant do threesome with my wife. WIFE= NICE LOVING SENSUAL SEX,but with GF= bite, slap, rough crazy sex everywhere. Alot of naija guys like Good girls as wife, but are attracted sexually to whores.

    • sweetie

      March 8, 2013 at 12:59 am

      Thank you jare!!!!

    • red soul

      March 8, 2013 at 1:26 am

      truth there….

      bite i get… bitten *ahem* good on you! 🙂

    • Ready

      March 8, 2013 at 2:44 pm

      Honestly, some dudes need to be slapped. So a wholesome woman won’t like to be spanked or like rough sex? You people are depriving some women of things they need. So if you were watching a movie with your wife and it had scenes of rough sex, and she told you she was turned on, that’s bad in your mind? You would look at her like a loose woman and never give her that. Shuu! This is why some women cheat…u are supposed to fulfil all her needs. See these people o! Essentially, you expect that you’ll cheat on your wife because surely, you can’t expect that your personal rough sex urges will go away.

  68. Rolli

    March 7, 2013 at 6:52 pm

    I see why Nigerian men usually feel entitled. It is your job to keep him. So, what is his role in the marriage. Does he have schizophrenia? Did his alter ego take vows, or his ghost. Egbami nitori Oruko Jesuuuuuuu. Didn’t any of the women read Chika Oduah’s article just yesterday? A lot of women are just exactly what she talked about. Placing too much importance on your vayjajay. Letting it define you. Your vaj comes first, you the woman later. Abi what kind of reasoning will make you say, if you don’t do your husband this, this and this, he will surely get it outside. Is that what you have reduced yourself to? I don’t blame the men kwa. Wallahi, I don’t blame them. So, that’s all you are, he fell in love with your vaj, he married your vaj, so if it (not you o, IT), doesn’t live up to his expectations of pleasure, he has every right to cheat, because it was your fault. After all he didn’t cheat on you na, just your vaj, so you shouldn’t feel bad or betrayed when he cheats. Did he make vows to your vaj? Maybe women should start hiking their dresses up in church, so that the man can kneel and say his vows to the vaj? You must love and obey, and submit to my every whim, whether you like it or not. Your sole role in life is to please me, you must honour my wishes, and he places the ring on the vaj? End of. You know all the styles, positions, all the latest, you are educated, tech savvvy, gbogbo e, gbogbo e, yet you in the most fundamental of your relationships, you still reasoning like the 1830 woman. I tire o.

  69. Rolli

    March 7, 2013 at 7:27 pm

    Wooooo, Bee. Take five jare. I was beginning to lose hope about Nigerian women, when I started reading the comments. When I got to yours, I said Hallelujah, finally someone that doesn’t have Daddy issues. Cos that’s all I will chuck all this lack of self worth talk to. I actually loooooooooove your reasons for abstaining, and not judging other people that have premarital sex. That part actually surprised me, honestly. Usually you don’t find both combo’s in one person. First time ever .
    Normally when I hear people use The Bible as their reason, I find myself rolling my eyes, because seriously, they can’t tell me they are living their lives 100% according to the Bible, so why do they suddenly go gangster when it is time to talk premarital sex, as if Pastors haven’t preached it enough. It is obviously not working, so they should try another angle, and that your angle was refreshing. Permission to summarise. Sex is easy, sex is cheap. Not sleeping with your girlfriend/boyfriend and still maintaing that relationship takes bloody hard work and dedication. If you don’t want to do that hard work and you cheat, you’ve just shown yourself up for who you are, you have no will/self control, and you don’t deserve someone that does. I just feel sorry for the girlfriends who allow married men to use them. He obviously “respects” (i use that word lightly cos he is cheating), and sees you as the whore to mess around with. Think about that. You are only good in his life for one thing.
    @sweets, so, knowing how to spell cunny, means that someone is watching porn, omo tell me which porn you watch o that they transcribe all the words they say, and someone will learn how to spell cunny from there. Some people should not be allowed to use the internet. I swear.

    • jenny

      March 7, 2013 at 9:42 pm

      So let me get this right? if somebody is not doing the bible 100%, they cannot do it 99% or 90% or even 50%. Is all or nothing right? Dont agree with that…

    • Magz

      March 8, 2013 at 2:34 pm

      i believe that if you’re gonna be judging people based on the Bible, you yourself must be obeying the Bible 100% and mind you, if you’re obeying the Bible 100%, you won’t judge.

    • Sister immaculate

      March 8, 2013 at 1:21 am

      Rolli if u roll your eyes at the bible being the reason for keeping Ur virginity before marriage sorry for you cos they don’t owe you an apology….whether u like it or not all Christians are a work in progress and I have not seen one who is 100 percent. Some areas in our Christian life pose more challenges than others….truth is, except a man be born again he will not see the kingdom of God so it behooves all to work out their salvation like the bible dictates….. Any reason a woman chooses to keep her virginity kudos to her just don’t judge others who do not cos virginity is not even a criteria to make heaven and God does not see the woman as just a vagina….he just expects that if u are single don’t fornicate and when married don’t commit adultery. In the event that u violate any of this and u genuinely ask forgiveness he is faithful and merciful to forgive…

    • Satisfied wifey

      March 8, 2013 at 1:38 am

      There is no law with what you can do with Ur sex life in the confines of marriage….I have been married 8 yrs and our sex life is great….we use to do the 69 at the beginning but now it no longer happens, honestly I enjoy him going down on me but found it hard to just keep his dicky boy in my mouth for long..we talk about what we want and am not ashamed to say where I want him to touch me…no annals or orgies or any toture kinda things but we try various styles and can be done anywhere…I believe as Christians u will know if u do something wrong and Ur heart will prick you so as long as its with Ur spouse alone and nothing that puts u at risk then it’s ok……don’t know if he gets the blow job anywhere else and I can’t shorten my life bothering about that, all I know is that our sex life is great, I currently don’t have any reason to suspect an affair and I get it hot when I need so we all happy…bottom line with all am saying is each relationship rolls diff, find what works for u both and do Ur thing….

  70. Mama mia!!!

    March 7, 2013 at 7:32 pm

    I’d say this in the best way I can. However people paint the picture of sex either with one person or by positions they Lie! sex is wrong outside the confines of marriage if you believe in the word of God , so there’s just no need to waste your words trying to justify the right sex from the wrong sex, Sex is Sex. and anyone who does it outside the confines of marriage sins be it with your boyfriend, fiancée, boyfriends, sugardady-mummy, girlfriend or friends na the same vehicle to hell!!!

  71. Concerned_Boyfriend

    March 7, 2013 at 7:34 pm

    ROFLMAO at some of these comments.

  72. Anonymous

    March 7, 2013 at 7:38 pm

    Biko, help a sister! Which one is upside-down n which is chandelier? I need to up ma game mehn!!!

    • please answer the question NOW!!!

      March 8, 2013 at 3:40 am

      *wink *wink…me tooo

  73. anonymous

    March 7, 2013 at 7:45 pm

    Nigerians!!!!!!!!!!!!! na wa oh! Rem Kim K’s environment permits it… our culture doesn’t so please leave the babe alone. Regarding sex please our spouse….. He might not be active initially but along the line he wants ??? Different strokes for different folks… Your spouse should be your best friend. You should be really open to him/her.


    March 7, 2013 at 9:31 pm

    The comments are quite entertaining! #blushing#

    • please answer the question NOW!!!

      March 8, 2013 at 3:35 am

      *wink *wink…me tooo

  75. MyDamnComment

    March 7, 2013 at 9:36 pm

    LOL @”when you sleep with that ya boyfriend wey never put ring on it, you are in the same category as KimK.”

    Anyway, Kim K is a goddxxm fighter, and a woman determined to make it regardless. Still there is dignity. If you aren’t courteous enough to keep your dirty linen away from public eye, you and your groupies can’t complain if you get slandered!

    PLUS, @MrMan has a point.

  76. Tosin

    March 7, 2013 at 9:59 pm

    Kim is entertainment, society, hollywood, not real. Because her publicist says she’s Mother Theresa doesn’t mean it’s true.

    In real life I’d say do whatever is safe and healthy in your sex life, it’s none of my business. Try everything, enjoy responsibly.

    For the men who are married, please go do your wife. Why keep a wife in wrapping paper at home and be hanging around looking to rent some? (I know why, but the charade is still very irritating)

  77. Neni Stone

    March 7, 2013 at 10:51 pm

    This is such a controversial topic, therefore in the end, nobody wins!

  78. say it

    March 7, 2013 at 11:11 pm

    @Rolli thank you very much!…some Bella Naija readers claim to be educated…but they are still hypocrites…….ask any of them if they decide to stop havn sex today, would their man stay by them?…so you its only the woman that should work and do 360 degrees in the relationship? can tell the ones that their husband married them for sex…hence ‘v’ counts…….its ok if its your thing and thats what you like …but why crucify the Likes of ADANNE and their opinion? calling them cavemen mentality? what if she doesnt like the idea of blow job?.trust me im no saint but what if she wants her man to like her for who she is rather than what she can offer in bed?……look at people calling others with a different mentality cavemen and close minded …nope …you lot shouting hypocrites are actually the hypocrites….gone are the days when it was learning how to cook to please a man….its now about learning all the sexual positions to please a man!…at the end of the day its still the man ..what about how he can make you happy? even if you do everything if he wants to cheat he will!!……..if you like jump from the ceiling ……sex and pleasure is a thing of the mind …as long as you both understand and love each other…if you look do missionary all the time …as long as your husband/partner is by your side ….no body problem…dont listen to all this ones saying you have to do this and that to make your husband not cheat…..sigh …do you and what suits you or anyone…….the funny part of the comments is that if those claiming to be enlightened or open minded or in 2013 should actually examine their mind they would see how hypocritical they themselves sound…..

    all this Kim K voltrons would be the first to critcize Goldie, tonto, cossy and our other Naija crazies

    • My point of view

      March 8, 2013 at 12:19 am

      The person that wrote this and Bee, should start a women’s education conference. Where do we get to lambast our fellow women for choosing their own paths to sexual fulfilment. Who wrote the rule book sef. Its one thing to say you must try your best to please each other as a married couple, it is another thing to say, you must do this so he doesn’t get it outside. Totally different points of view. So if you are not comfortable with it, you must do it sha, so he doesn’t get it outside. All, I’ve read in a lot of comments is, you must, you must, you have to, why can’t you. What about your own needs, your own perceptions of what you like and don’t like. Should your man’s needs trump that? Are you a slave? You are his wife, he should also come down from his sexual high experienced horse and consider what your needs and expectations are and adjust, so you guys can meet halfway. Why must it be you the woman that has to adjust and do what he wants. That’s sexual bullying, and I can see our fellow women, also bullying each other. If you don’t like it nko, is that his green card to cheat? Can’t he push back all he has acquired before meting you, wipe the slate clean and start afresh? Discovering other ways both of you can willingly enjoy it, without one person blackmailing/bullying the other. Any man that truly loves you, and identifies with you outside your vagina, should be able to do that. It’s not asking for too much. Or is he an animal that cannot control himself? Have any of those women talking must, must considered that? If you suddenly have to learn all the learnables (learnables according to who sef), isn’t it okay for Bros too to “unlearn” (if you already knew it before, ehn that’s fine). Or because everyone says that’s the only road to good sex and keeping a man, you too must follow like a sheep, and because he is the man, you must submit to his wishes. I swear if we women spent more time working on our relationships than learning all the latest sex positions, and if were women also demanded that our men do the same maybe, just maybe we’ll have a happier society. 89 comments on Chika Oduah’s article, and I was raising my fists in the air, yes o, yes o, Nigerian women are getting it. Up us. Then I come here, and read 180+ comments, and I’m like WTH!!!!, please where are those women that commented on that article. Or like Chika said, we have been reduced to the V again.

    • red soul

      March 8, 2013 at 1:19 am

      Thank You Roli.. you’re an enlightened Nigerian.

      …. ps. Kim K voltrons! Slayed from laughtha!

  79. MR T

    March 7, 2013 at 11:43 pm

    am a married man and my wife love me going down on her. so sex is important in any marriage.
    YES DEAR am coming let me finish…. sorry guys make i waka my “attongue” is needed. lol

    Azonto for BN readers see comments…

    • Rukky

      March 8, 2013 at 12:27 am

      Hahahaha!!! Thank you 4 making me laugh MR T and I quote, “…love…going down on her…am coming let me finish” 🙂 what’s going on in this forum?

    • Madam the Madam

      March 8, 2013 at 2:19 am


  80. Tasha

    March 7, 2013 at 11:48 pm

    lool this is funny. I’d go off on a limp (which I dare say isn’t a long one) and say Kim K is def not sexually moral and purity/modesty is not one of her virtues. She exists to inspire lust in men and maybe even women. Hahahahahaha I didn’t know she had so many defendants not just fans. And please sex before marriage is still a sin so all of u defending ur im sleeping with my man because I like sex and bla bla I guess God, the bible, holiness and purity are not ur concerns. This is too funny, Kim K, morals, sex, Naija men… please keep it coming.

    • please answer the question NOW!!!

      March 8, 2013 at 3:27 am

      na who ask for your 2 freaking cents…shut up jare!!! am sure ur not a virgin. #guilty conscience

  81. Moi

    March 8, 2013 at 12:11 am

    Women do not be deceived: any man that tells you that he is just playing around and trying this or that whilst he is single or in a boyfriend-girlfriend relationship so that when he marries he would put a stop to it – at that point of getting married – is lying. He will not change. Go and ask women who are married to philanderers they will tell how they have been deceived by this line. Do not be deceived!!!

  82. AD123

    March 8, 2013 at 12:12 am

    Hmmm bellanaija. Has made my nite! Lmao…..see comments, my stomach aches from lafta!! Nah so my ex boyfriend do me ooh, he likes bj but give me felatio nah war……soo so rules and rugualations during sex “don’t touch my nipples it makes me feel feminine, don’t kiss me deeply, too much exchang of saliva isn’t healthy, I can’t lick u, its kinda degrading”. wen enjoyment don over take me I go 4get myself, break all d rules ( u can’t blame me nah mbok who keeps rules in ur head wen straffing), but dat will be d end of d sex Cos he will stop and quarrel me 4 rule breaking. I just advised myself 1 day and quit d relationship, b4 e propose 2 me, I say no den dem call me heart breaker 4 dis Lag. Believe it or not, bad sex and financial insecurity can destroy a marriage I had none wit him in d realationship, so I took my bag and catwalked.

  83. AD123

    March 8, 2013 at 12:33 am

    Hmmm bellanaija. Has made my nite! Lmao…..see comments, my stomach aches from lafta!! Nah so my ex boyfriend do me ooh, he likes bj but give me felatio nah war……soo so rules and regulations during sex “don’t touch my nipples it makes me feel feminine, don’t kiss me deeply, too much exchange of saliva isn’t healthy, I can’t lick u, its kinda degrading”. wen enjoyment don over take me I go 4get myself, break all d rules ( u can’t blame me nah, mbok who keeps rules in their head wen straffing), but dat will be d end of d sex Cos he will stop and quarrel me 4 rule breaking. I just advised myself 1 day and quit d relationship, b4 e propose 2 me, I say no den dem call me heart breaker 4 dis Lag. Believe it or not, bad sex and financial insecurity can destroy even a marriage I had neither gud sex or financial security wit him in d relationship, so I took my bag and catwalked. ( D Chauvinistic prude is still begging but I have moved on. )

  84. Oreos

    March 8, 2013 at 12:46 am

    lol….the comments are too funny!
    For all of you that believe that you are freaks in the bedroom: More power to you! but do not bash people that are not comfortable with it, because sex is way more than a physical thing, its also emotional so if you are not comfortable you cannot enjoy sex the way you are supposed to…
    Also, please oh! Women too are supposed to enjoy sex, innit?! so keeping the romance in a marriage is on both of us, cos damn it i also want to feel good too! Also, it seems like many of you are doing the crazy moves to keep your men from cheating on you….NEWS FLASH- A goat is a goat, if he wants to cheat, he will cheat, because no matter how freaky you think you are, there is somebody that can tear the sheet quicker than you, so DO YOU and be happy because you cannot stop a man from straying if he wants to no matter how many BJ’s you give him!

  85. Rukky

    March 8, 2013 at 12:55 am

    hahaahaah (crying and laughing at the same time), Atoke is right, I spoke to some pastor (believe it or not) who said that he married his wife a virgin (fair and fine) but that he still flirts and has raunchy sexy time (Borat’s voice lol) with other women.
    Further, he mentioned that he does not over satisfy his wife in bed so that when he travels and can’t be intimate with her she doesn’t get unbearably lonely and cheat! I was flabbergasted. With other women, he continued, and I quote “I fit go 7-10 rounds sef! But I no wan spoil my wife that’s why after 2 rounds I go just do like say I wan sleep”
    I don’t know why some men assume that an honorable woman does not do certain down-and-dirty things in the bedroom? Equally, I don’t know why some women form like they are clueless about certain sexual positions and are reluctant to experiment with their husbands? And I can just hear some women lament “e go tink say I been dey do ashawo before I meet am o! (hands on head lol) Well…@ least he won’t go hunting for women to satisfy his sexual desires (probabilities are slim in this instance) and he’ll go to bed with a smile on his face, even though he might have an arched eyebrow. Who cares? e no go divorce you because you give it to him good, who does that?
    Moral of the day: be Margaret Thatcher at day and Blac Chyna at night—happy sex life, happy married life!

    • Ready

      March 8, 2013 at 2:16 pm

      Don’t mind them. People are either entering marriage with the wrong mindset, or settling for someone who is not their best friend. To me o, you don’t have to know the names of your boo’s sex partners, but you should have an idea of the range. If the guy doesn’t want you, he doesn’t niyen. How does one even remember to be an involved participant during sex, but not be over involved and still enjoy sex? Your brain isn’t supposed to be working hard during the do…so you’re thinking to yourself, “thrust but do it awkwardly so it doesn’t make him feel too good” or when you know something would feel better if he moved just an inch to the left, you would keep quiet? Miss me with that. Marry your best friend and he’ll know what you stand for and what you’re about, that way there’s no need to pretend!

  86. Idak

    March 8, 2013 at 1:59 am

    On a very serious note, what exactly is wrong with anal?
    If it is not to your taste,just state so but don’t condemn cos it ain’t your taste. I am sure a few believers will soon show up to defend the act.

    • Old school

      March 9, 2013 at 5:43 am

      Anal is wrong it is wrong…..dis one be about religion na common sense….dat is shit hole and bacteria prone so if u like keep Ur yansh make dem scatter am….go ask Ur doctor before u start forming open eye…

    • zsa zsa

      March 9, 2013 at 8:58 am

      Thank you ooooooooo!!! If certain positions are not your taste then don’t practice them but don’t tag them “sin”. I do EVERYTHING with my husband because i actually like it, not because i don’t want him to “stray”….anal however has been a toughie so we gave that up. Everything else is a go ! I also don’t understand how the bible became a manual for sex…”the bible says don’t do ….” is it not all sex? If it goes in your mouth or your ear so??? How do you restrict yourself in the throws of passion? And who says certain positions are meant for porn movies??? where did the porn stars(as they are called) get their ideas from? is it not the normal sex normal married/unmarried people have that pornographers decided to put on film and make some money with?
      Life is hard enough, you think about family, finances, work etc you now add sex to the list ? sex should be enjoyed unless of course you are just not that into each other then….sorry o.

  87. charming

    March 8, 2013 at 2:08 am

    Yaay!!! I made it, I read all d comments nd I mst say thank u to does who talked some sense into does women dat hv paraded dre weakness, infact dey ar way worse dat kim.I hv often said ning dat if u married a dog dnt think dat treating him like a lion. Wud automatically turn him to alion ,e is a dog ndmst function like 1. Only God’s Word cn transform a man nt religion

  88. please answer the question NOW!!!

    March 8, 2013 at 3:25 am

    can someone pls answer the question asked. all these gist about kim k dey spoil d answer. where all d guys dey. make una answer question jare. who cares about kim k. sheewwwww

    • Again

      March 8, 2013 at 8:43 am

      Lol….I think ur question was about upsde down. Imagine the man lifts the woman upside downdown. He can then perfrform oral sex on her and she can do the same to him at the same time. Of course, he’d hve to be quite strong for them to last doing that. Or they lay on the bed in the same position and pleasure eaxh other at the same time. Then it would be called the 69 position

    • Abiola

      March 8, 2013 at 2:22 pm

      Sorry, excuse me, I’m assuming you mean, the guy positions the girl upside down, facing him, erm……….won’t that increase blood flow into her brain? I’m sure you know what I’m leading up to…..nose bleeds, and what not, I might be wrong sha! Sorry, I’m sprouting technicalities in the midst of the sexual knowledge sharing, but just wondering……..

    • Again

      March 8, 2013 at 2:02 pm

      Another upside down position some pple like is where the girl leans against a couch or soft chair with her head touching the floor and her bottom up. Not regular doggy style. This one u do as if you’re going to start a sommersault or tumble. The position you’ll be in. Is upside down. The guy can then penetrate in that position. Watch for blood rushing to ur head and stop if it’s too uncomfortable for you. Or only do this for a few mins at a time. Some guys swear the really love it though as the girl is completely open to them

    • Again

      March 8, 2013 at 3:30 pm

      Yes Abiola, seems I answered your question in my next post. Got to be careful with blood flow to the head but as long as you don’t stay in that position for too long, it’s perfectly safe. As with all positions, the important thing is to be in tune with your body. If the guy can’t lift the girl, then leave positions that require lifting alone. If the girl starts feeling uncomfortable, light headed etc, then tell him to switch positions. You can always try it for a minute at a time and see how you feel

  89. bindiddy

    March 8, 2013 at 7:20 am

    choi!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! cant stop laffing at all these comments…….keep it rolling biko.

  90. Benson

    March 8, 2013 at 8:09 am

    I think sexual styles depends on the party involved.If they like let them do dog style,if they like let them do acrobatic styles na them sabi.Style no style sex na sex and e go still enter which ever position.But as for me i like doing it back and front.HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

  91. Chic

    March 8, 2013 at 8:55 am

    The only thing the Quran forbids is anal n sex during yr period,sex in marriage should all u both ever fantasised about and pleasing each other ,most of all adventurous ,what keeps a man is his fear of God,connection with his wife then good sex….

  92. Danie

    March 8, 2013 at 9:40 am

    Everybody has made a mistake one way or the other, I wont argue that Kim K doesn’t have her issues and doesn’t needs moral awakening but the truth is most of you that pick on her have worse issues or SINS that you are dealing with. Sex is not the worst sin, Pride ranks higher (that’s what made the Devil who he is), so u sitting on that high horse glossing someone’s wrongdoings doesn’t make u a saint.


    March 8, 2013 at 9:45 am

    Let me add my own two cents: I am a virgin.
    Now the decision to keep myself is for me and God alone.
    Being a virgin does not make me better than the next girl. Common! if I carry the virginity on my head and I still indulge in other sins like common lying or envy, it is still the same HELL FIRE that both me and the gang banging slut will end up in.
    That been said, omo when I get married wo! I would do , overdo and under do.
    All those years of waiting must not be in vain on. In fact it is prayer point sef. God my marriage must be satisfactory all round, emotionally, financially, and sexually.
    @ Virgins Unite, let us remember that God should be the center of our decisions and not any man. I know of virgins that have married the worst douche bags.
    God help us

    • Mimi

      March 11, 2013 at 3:56 am

      Ha!Ha!Ha! Comments on point!

  94. Julit

    March 8, 2013 at 10:45 am

    Who wants to see my sex tape? That doesn’t make me a woman with no values at all. In fact I am the head of youths in my church and the secretary of harvest committee in my church. Lets get down to it. I do all sorts, anal, fisting, tossing the salad,… guys should try that. It’s awesome….my candid advice, Kim k is taking care of her “men” and so should every other woman. Give your husband a blowjob and blow his mind. He’ll buy you that purse, that car, that hair whatever. Wake up umu afrika and stop being judgemental

    • anon

      March 8, 2013 at 2:07 pm

      tossing the salad?? fisting??? just when i tot i knew it all

    • Idak

      March 8, 2013 at 5:03 pm

      Anilingus = tossing the salad.


    • Idak

      March 8, 2013 at 5:07 pm

      it originated from the prison system where lower inmates are forced to lick the assholes of the leading inmates, but they put salad dressing on it to hide the taste.

    • Person

      March 8, 2013 at 5:19 pm

      Fisting: Self-explanatory. Inserting a whole fist into the vjj. And yes, a whole hand can enter. Don’t ask me how ^__^
      Tossing the salad/Salad toss: Known as anal rimming. Inserting tongue into the anus. It works too. #theend.

    • Idak

      March 9, 2013 at 8:16 am

      Anilingus = tossing the salad.
      it originated from the prison system where lower inmates are forced to lick the assholes of the leading inmates, but they put salad dressing on it to hide the taste.

  95. cutephunkie

    March 8, 2013 at 10:53 am

    oh boy! this comments are so hilarious…… i kip refreshing to read more comments lol

  96. Stella Kashmoney

    March 8, 2013 at 11:16 am

    Loving the comments here. Cracking me up big time, lol…Pls keep them coming.

  97. Anonymous

    March 8, 2013 at 11:46 am

    Same reason why am not a!..however my partner does not agree with sex before marriage so though he appreciates my sexual orientation he wants me to remain his “virgin” till marriage 🙂

  98. praisy

    March 8, 2013 at 11:58 am

    BN. This topic is really HAWT! more comments please!

  99. la belle

    March 8, 2013 at 12:10 pm

    i am not a virgin….but i made a convenant with God to abstain from sex till i get married since i got born again, but that said…when i do get married i will do everything there is possible, every position, every style with my husband. sex with my husband will be a fun adventure

  100. pareto

    March 8, 2013 at 12:53 pm

    hi folks, lets seperate the chaff from the wheat, lets not use a religious sentiment to judge the issue on the ground.anyone could as well fall into that deep shit kim finds her self into and i’m pretty sure it wasn’t an intentional act thus, this should serve as a wake up call to every other women out there not to be too infatuated by the aura of love and engaged in some uncontrolable emotional arobatic displaying move, which paraventually resulted to shame/disdane and afortiori, who on the this face of planent doesn’t know the essential role a good sex plays between marriage couple. therefore a wife should not hesitate to give her husband a blow job if asked and the husband must reciprocrate if the need arise…..i imploy you all to discern from hauling insult on kim k and i hope people in general will not start having this impression that she’s my fan..just felt that some of us here are matured enough to subject things right before screwing up….”””Nemo judex incar sasua.

  101. SUZANNE

    March 8, 2013 at 4:14 pm

    Let he who is without sin…cast the first stone

    SIN IS SIN. There is no small or big sin.

    If you’ve ever kissed, smooched, slept with or had a baby with/for anyone you are NOT MARRIED to, then the painful truth is, we are all sinners b4 God. Its Gods mercy & grace that is still keeping us all.

    What makes KimK worse than Beyonce, Rihana and all them celebs who are selling sex for money one way or the other? Wise up! They are ALL in the same category yet you admire and aplaud them. Pls, if you wanna condemn people, then be consistent in your condemnation.

    I have no hard feeling towards KimK and ofcourse am not gonna live my life like hers. But who am I to badmouth her when am a 27-year old virgin who has been kissed, smooched, carressed, petted and even fingered by my BF??? Virgin indeed right? What makes me any better? I’m ashamed of my actions, I ask God for forgiveness of sins and try to stop but smx I fall off the wagon again (we all do, so why crucify others???). So am gonna let KimK be. I’ll face my life and try to keep it heaven-worthy. If we are to do a roll-call of holiness and bla bla bla dat some pple are saying, NO ONE will stand so stop criticizing another FOR WHAT YOU ALSO DO IN A DIFFERENT WAY.

    Am not fooled by the sanctimonious comments here, na dem worse pass.

    Pls dont satistfy you spouse in bed, you’d be surprised that God will judge you for that. See them talking as if they are not curious and would love to experience some of the sex styles mentioned here. Abeg, am not perfect, I make mistakes, I screw up. and I will continue to dust my skirt and straighten maself out.

    I know am gonna enjoy sex with my husband. Am gonna try diff styles, am gonna blow him to cloud 9 and he’s gonna lick me till I scream out loud. Am gonna keep my marraige bed ever spicy and no woman from the pit of hell will ever snatch my husband from him coz am gonna cover him on all fronts – food, sex, money (yes, money! what belongs to me belongs to him and vise-versa), companionship, prayers, fulfilment of purpose, home-front, children. Everything! Am getting marrried in about 9 weeks and I cannot wait to enjoy sex with him! am sooo eager!!!

    Stay there and be reading your bible upside down. Those that are smarter than you will claim your husband real good and you’ll still be there, joblessly arguing on BN as if you are holier than the virgin mary.

    PS, it will SHOCK you that KimK go enter heaven b4 u sef

    • FF

      March 8, 2013 at 5:15 pm

      Tan ara e nibe in English for, be deceiving yourself. It is not you that will prevent him from cheating. You didn’t write the book on marriage, neither are you going to win wife of the century award. Stop thinking it has to be you that will prevent him from cheating. Not once, I mean, not once have you mentioned what he will do for you, or what he is going to bring to the table that will give you a fulfilling marriage, and make him faithful. In your epistle, it is what, you you, you, will do. Are you marrying yourself. That’s the mentality a lot of Nigerian women take into marriage, and you wonder why years later they are looking drained and exhausted, while the man is looking fresh. Why won’t he, you’ve made his job easy, you’ve done all the work for him. Why won’t over 95% of the comments here be women. We’ve carried the whole load on our head. You must do this, and that, so that no other woman will snatch him. Omo girl, man wey want waka, go waka, if you like cover him from all fronts including the air, and under the ground. Those men that cheat, you think their wives don’t do that and more, you think so? Ask Annie all she did for 2Face, ask her, he still went around sharing sperm like candy, till his eyes cleared and he came back, but at what cost. Everyone was saying she was there for him at the beginning, she was this, she did that, yet he still cheated. Or you will blame Annie too, that she couldn’t keep her man. Its not your job to keep the man, the man too should keep himself, and honour the vows he made to you, after all your wedding vows weren’t done in absentia. BN, you guys have great writers and you are educators of the general population, you need to get a correct, I mean correct writer to thrash this issue out. Some women need re-education abeg. Today, International Women’s day, and we are still slaves to the mann.

    • AAsh

      March 9, 2013 at 8:16 pm

      Happy Married Life in advance, May GOD bless and keep your home.Amen

  102. Mfon

    March 8, 2013 at 4:43 pm

    This is not a topic…..

  103. PH Boy

    March 8, 2013 at 4:54 pm

    ….are you related to Pastor Chris??

  104. Queen E

    March 9, 2013 at 12:18 am

    Abeg abeg make una leave Jcgurl alone!Na wetin?!! She is so very much entitled to her opinion! I agree with her, Kim is loose and if you will base it on the fact of who has opened leg for who. Yes you can say we are all loose together.I agree too. But that everybody does so doesn’t mean it is right. The truth will always always be the truth. Its funny when you don’t agree with popular opinion you are the bad or judgemental one. No one is perfect but as i said the truth is the truth! Kpam!!!

  105. Anuli

    March 9, 2013 at 2:52 am

    After reading all these comments………. all i can do is exhale.

  106. bindiddy

    March 9, 2013 at 9:33 am

    @julit abeg which one is ”tossing the salad” again?

  107. Jamce

    March 9, 2013 at 8:23 pm

    Na wa o. Those of you calling people “judgmental” because they pointed out what in their opinion is morally wrong, on what basis do you also say someone else has done something wrong? Is that not also being judgmental? For instance Idak says in one of her posts that some men do have “offsprings as fruits of their ‘evil acts'”. Please by what standard did Idak concluded that or “judged” their acts of extra-marital sex as “evil acts”? So if the likes of Kim can pose nude, be pregnant for a man while still being legally married to another and most people are saying they see nothing wrong with that, why would Idak call extra-marital sex evil acts. Is this not being “hypocritically judgmental”?. Yet jscgrl has drawn a lot of flak in this forum for criticizing Kim. My point is that let everyone be allowed their opinion on an issue without abuses and name calling.

  108. MissyD

    March 10, 2013 at 4:00 pm

    Concerning whether to blow or not to blow, I think you guys should watch (listen to) this

    It’s pretty funny but it’s also a real issue for many couples.

  109. Brightonlad

    March 10, 2013 at 10:41 pm

    That awkward moment when some ladies that watch Keeping up with the K’s think it is not scripted ……..Kim K should go and hide herself for a bit she is in my breakfast, newspaper, lunch, dinner, tv, magazine, swimming pool, google….. Abi na she own the world

  110. jen

    March 11, 2013 at 3:14 am

    lmaoo…these comments….learnt quite a few things sha

  111. Mimi

    March 11, 2013 at 3:42 am

    I don’t know why people pay so much attention to Kim K. Why would anyone pay attention to a person who is only famous because of a sex tape? She hasn’t added anything to the world of performing arts. Please, people look for better things to do with your time.

    I believe that a whore is a whore regardless of gender. I do not have respect for a man that sleeps with any woman and then expects to have a virgin bride. I don’t care how good looking you maybe. It is just disgusting.

  112. Zeebs

    March 11, 2013 at 3:51 am

    Kai! nearly 36 hours after the last comment. Pot don cold now…
    In any case, I have been very much entertained and greatly educated. Gosh, the reply thread here beats Kamasutra’s latest edition, hands down!
    And at the risk of sounding like a broken record( for going back to KimK), morals and ethics have always been a dicey issue. With an uncomfortable ‘point-of-view’ twist to it. it always depends on who is ‘viewing’ the matter at hand.
    However, Is KimK going to be viewed as loose in MOST cultures of the world? Hell to the yes! She is a woman who has risen to stardom by the power of her anatomy. Is that good or bad?… Is she ever going to grace a state occasion or be acknowledged by the US of A for doing that? Quite unlikely. You might choose to argue though, that we haven’t got the right nor locus standi to discusss someone else’s morality. I wouldn’t argue over that. I’m not surprised though that this argument is going on here. Simply because the Nigeria of today is one where ‘anything goes’. Nothing is etched in stone. and we are all ‘mixing and matching’ and want to feel good about it. Why are we all threatening the folks that called KimK names with the allegation that ‘we are sure they are doing worse’? If I am a chain smoker does it make smoking any less the evil it is. #Enough said
    As for experimenting in bed with my husband, that’s a given. He will be stunned at my antics the day they will be unleashed. However I shall not do things that will make me puke at the thought of food… We are all ruling out anal sex now. People like us did so 20 years ago and if the only reason they opined so then was because it was unpopular and practised only in the red light districts of Amsterdam and San Francisco, then I bet you they would have a change of heart now because… it is popular, it is acceptable, widely!, the key to Oga’s heart. In fact if you are not doing it, better organise your exodus to the visitor’s room cos numero two is on her way! Whether we want to do it or not, JDI! #JustDoIt. Abi? That’s an unbiased conclusion to come to from all we have written so far.
    People, shall we please abide by certain actions from our own convictions and not the ‘multiple waves of doctrine on the streets?’ # To each his own. #To thine own self be true.

  113. Mimi

    March 11, 2013 at 3:52 am

    Also, nobody can tell me what to do with my husband. If I don’t do all the things I plan to do with my husband, who will I then do it with? People should just concentrate on their own marriage. There is no place in the bible that prohibits a married couple from performing a particular sexual act on each other.

  114. jyde

    March 12, 2013 at 1:10 pm

    All the ladies that dont want to do this and do that,make una no worry.
    But dont be angry when you wake up in the middle of the night and find your man tumbling all over the place with a rubber dolly who looks like you.

    • Magz

      March 15, 2013 at 2:40 pm

      @jyde, lmao!!!!!! your comments are always so funny

  115. Madam Butterfly

    March 13, 2013 at 12:24 pm

    Wow, blow jobs not for married men. OMG! No wonder half the men out there have girls friends.

  116. Sugabelly

    March 15, 2013 at 3:22 pm

    If Kim Kardashian is going to hell, then the WHOLE OF NIGERIA is going to meet her there. Including all the people commenting on this post.

    In fact, there will be Lagos, Abuja, PH, etc sections of hell because all of you righteous women will be there too.

    Never seen such a large collection of hypocrites in one place all together. Oh wait, I have, it’s called Nigeria.

  117. Lee

    March 19, 2013 at 11:18 am

    men! the cooments hia are over the top funy and enlightening too i must say. but the thing is inasmuch as i dont belive that no good sex at home is enuf reason for one’s spouse to cheat, cos the bible says hubby and wifey must be faithfull to each other, i dont subcribe to d fact dt some sexual poistions sud be restricted in marriage. i mean if i dont get freaky with my hubby after keeping my self till marriage, then who then will i get freaky with, the angels? i mean some things are just common sence and pls pls anal sex is demonic. there is reason why God made the anus and the virgina abeg.

  118. Don't get it twisted

    April 1, 2013 at 3:03 pm

    All are sinners.fullstop# sex in marriage should be without limits ,reason why men cheat is they are looking for adventure outside their marriages cos their wives are stupid !

  119. reggy

    April 10, 2013 at 12:39 pm

    am not trying to support any bparty ere but if it whr to b a naija celeb wt dis kimk issue,we def know that so many of us wud v murdered the lady with out tongue,am jst saying.i have a bf we v bn together for a long time more than 5yrs but no sex not bcus am forming bornagain or wannab mary mother of jesus,its just a personal decision that am proud of,and it shows hes not dating me cus igv him a bj or poledance which i wil def do wen am married ofcus,but that we love each other for who we are not for any sexual styles and he hasnt left me or anything and i have never find any reason to question his fidelity,we are getting married this year november.all am saying is that u alone has the final say of how u want your life to be plus how you want people to treat you

  120. teeteewright

    April 12, 2013 at 11:54 am

    Na wa ooo , the most interesting aspect of the stories is the comments..Naija people no go kill person. Most of the comments here are asides the writer. She asked for comments on good-girl sex styles and bad-girl sex styles, but instead of discussing that we are discussing Kim….u people should leave kim to be judged by God..shikena

  121. Teetee

    April 14, 2013 at 4:15 am

    It’s just annoying when you state your opinion,especially in regards to morality,folks start to tag you as being Judgemental…..for example,if I’m a thief and I find myself in a discussion about stealing and armed robbery,the fact that I steal doesnt mean il start to justify stealing or make excuses for why people is is wrong.If you are a Christian here and your applauding Kimk’s lifestyle I urge you to question your Christianity and your walk with God.this is not to say she should be insulted or judged but you have to stand firm on what the word of God says its not pleasing to God.God says FLEE fornication!!! no one is perfect but because you have sex doesn’t mean you should insult people that think it’s right to wait.Every idle word you say will be taken account of,including the ones you come and write here supporting what God stands against…be wise.God bless

  122. anon

    April 14, 2013 at 10:47 am

    So the majority of people here think that cos kim k has a sordid past and present, nobody should comment about it unless you are a virgin. So those same commenters go through life seeing or hearing scandal or wrongdoing of some sort and stay SILENT cos they have at some point done something bad hmmm…somehow i dont think so. Anyway, i watched ‘the Kardashians’ for the first time last week and i dont think kim k has two brain cells to rub together, thats the imression i got, but hey i’m not a PhD Student so who am i to comment on her intelligence…..(sarcasm)

  123. Peace

    June 10, 2013 at 12:41 am


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