A month ago a friend of mine moved to Nigeria from “obodoyibo” (America to be specific) and I decided to take her around Las Gidi. After a while, I noticed she was becoming less interested in our outings. What kind of Yankee duller is this babe I thought, so one day I decided to confront her. My friend is a very beautiful lady; most men would look at her twice if she walks past. However, she told me she always felt under dressed each time we went out. I laughed so hard and realized that our Lagos “fashionistas” have most likely tensioned her closet. At this point, with my “tongue in cheek” I decided to enlighten her by giving 10 tips on how to become a Lagos fashionista from head to toe.
Hair: To be a true Lagos fashionista, you have to be a member of team weave from any continent apart from Africa. You must purchase several bundles and the weave ought to be at least 18inches long. If for any reason your natural hair needs to be out, (this must not happen too often by the way), it should ONLY be packed up into a bun that’s at least 10cms high.
Eyebrows: Any makeup artist would tell you that the eyebrows are the most important facial feature. As a fashionista you have to accentuate your eyebrows by making them as thick as possible and draw them like an upside down Nike sign.
Eyes: How else are you going to draw attention to yourself if your eyes don’t speak volumes? Your eye makeup needs to be very dramatic. This can only be done by making use of many colours of eyeshadow at the same time. Don’t forget to stick on false lashes that are long enough to touch your eyebrows.
Lips: Let your lips do the talking without saying a word! Use only very bright colours like red, pink, purple, orange and plum. If you do not want to diversify, just stick to a MAC Ruby Woo and call it a day. Please DON’T forget to pout.
Skin tone: It’s unfortunate but fashionistas are not supposed to be dark in complexion. If you are not naturally fair you have to make use of chemical peels, lightening and bleaching creams. If you are lucky enough to be light in complexion, you had better maintain it and avoid the sun as much as possible. If the air conditioning in your boyfriend’s car is faulty….dump him.
Clothes: This in itself is a topic on its own. All I can say is whatever a fashionista is putting on MUST have some element of colour blocking. For example you can combine a yellow top with a purple skirt and carry a green hand bag!
Shoes: Thou shall not be caught wearing flat shoes. If your shoes are not at least 6 inches, high dispose of it. The accepted standard is any high heeled shoe with a red sole as it can easily pass as designed by Christian Louboutin.
Manicure & Pedicure: As a fashionista, every part of you needs to be colourful and loud. Therefore, nobody is supposed to see your nails without some colour. It is also important to make sure your fingernails are very long like a lion’s claw.
Accessories: Over accessorizing does not exist in a Lagos fashionista’s rule book. Your outfit is never complete without a huge statement necklace (at least 0.2 kg); heavy bracelets aka ‘arm candy’, gigantic chandelier ear rings, Michael Kors wrist watch (fake or real) and a collection of “vintage” rings. Also, fashionistas do not carry handbags that are not from a high end label.
Mobile Phones: To complete your Lagos fashionista look, you must be in possession of at least two phones. One must be a blackberry (Bold 5 and above) and the other should be an iPhone or Samsung galaxy phone. The Blackberry is supposed to help you look busy as you ping away because a fashionista is not supposed to be idle. The iPhone and Samsung is for you to post your look of the day on Instagram for your “fans” to like and learn.
DISCLAIMER: I strongly believe less is more but if you feel like trying any of these tips……be my guest!
Photo Credit: morsipr.blogspot.com