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5 Tips for Planning a Bridal Shower – Naija Style

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Planning a bridal shower is almost like a bullet you cannot dodge; especially if you’re a close female friend/relative to the bride-to-be. You have the little issues of people not remembering to RSVP, or people forgetting that it’s meant to be a surprise and they go on to blab to the bride. Basically, there are so many reasons to say ‘I no do again’. However, you find yourself doing it again and again because it’s all about that special person you love and want to create a great experience for – the bride.

Bridal showers became an integral part of my social life after the first of my many girlfriends got engaged in 2003 (or maybe 2002? I forget) and I was heavily involved in her pre-marital preparations. That first affair was the sort of feeble effort that only a novice could have pulled off.It was staged in her fiancé’s house because we all still inhabited our parents’ abodes. Nobody put much thought to food; I was ignorant about the party-saving powers of bridal shower games and she was one of the first of us to be getting married so we neglected the “advice” section which would have equipped her with words of wisdom for the journey ahead. I think the highlight of the evening was when said fiancé gate-crashed our little gathering bringing music, plenty of drinks and his friends (many of whom were of the good-looking & single variety), thereby saving the day as we turned our attentions to partying and being eyed up by fine boys.

Since then, my planning skills have increased as my pool of single girlfriends has rapidly decreased and it’s clear that bridal showers are now permanently embedded in the Nigerian wedding culture. I’m not sure when exactly it became the norm but we seem to have happily adopted this very American concept by giving it a unique touch of Nigerian-ness, which makes me wonder what social events we previously used to plug that hole?

History insists we had customs like the fattening houses in some Niger Delta communes and dancing around the village square with other maidens (sometimes bare chested, to the men’s delight) in Igboland but did they effectively do the job of preparing a bride for her nuptials, the way a bridal shower rightly can? I don’t have a clue. What I do have, however, are experiences of the Nigerian bridal shower experience and maybe a few tips (while attempting to squeeze you for some of your own) on how to make it all worthwhile for the bride, you as the planner, and all other invitees to your little soiree.

Spa Day or Themed-party?
Know thy bride and know her tastes. Stop following that one script which says we must all gather in one location to eat and gist for a couple of hours. Mix it up, mbok! Your bride is probably stressed and up to her eyeballs in pre-wedding organizing so why not exploit the few hours that you’ve assembled her and all her special friends together? You could have indoor and/or outdoor activities (shopping doesn’t count), build enthusiasm and interest by putting teasers in your invitation about the fun event you’re planning and try and see if that doesn’t get prompter responses to your RSVP requests. It is very possible to start your planning from the day she tells you her wedding date so that you have plenty time to lock down dates, book venues, etc.

The Budget
I know you feel offended that after buying the expensive Asoebi, I’m talking about spending more money. However, you’ll need to determine where the spending for bridal shower is emanating from. Send word early to other close friends if you need contributions for food/the cake/favours. Take my experience as gospel, if you pay for it before discussing it, you’ll probably never get money back. Everyone else should be tapped to bring necessaries like drinks, disposables and finger food. This is not the wedding day; serving rice is not a must. Remember, they’re probably arriving with gifts for the bride and you don’t want to clean out their wallet before they can get a chance to pay for their own Asoebi.

The Scandalous Gifts
I’ve seen these in all shapes and forms. I personally know a woman who religiously buys Durex lube for all brides-to-be, just because of her own haunting wedding night experience.Although, she’ll tell you plainly that her lube only goes to ‘untouched brides’. Anyone with a track record should be able to survive the “do”. My thoughts on her logic are for another discussion but I actually like her idea – it’s sensual, practical and thoughtful.

Here’s the thing with wispy, lacy nothings –in the Nigerian context.It’s very likely that the couple want kids immediately after the wedding and so you give her loads of naughty size-8 underwear which is great for the honeymoon but gets consigned to the back of her drawer once she gets pregnant and shifts gear to maternity bras. Let’s not forget the possibility of her going up a size post-baby.My married girlfriends bemoan the wasting away of their bridal shower lingerie, abandoned after little or no use.

So, think differently. Scented candles are a great gift, as are cheeky items such as sex cheques (basically a cheque book with promissory notes to do something interesting to the other party), massage kits, feather ticklers and furry handcuffs (only for the adventurous minded. Remember how I said you should know thy bride?) I once included a pregnancy kit in my bridal shower gift to a friend because I knew she and her hubs were keen on trying for a baby immediately. If you choose to do underwear, getting her separates such as bras, panties and silk/satin wraps or dressing gowns are also a good idea.

Giving *coughs* Advice
One of the most boisterous sessions of the Naija bridal shower,is when you get to hear some of the most disturbing details you wish you never discovered about the sex lives of certain couples. I don’t know what it is about bridal showers, but I find that some ladies get very open and unnecessarily descriptive. I truly don’t need to know how many times a night and what position your man likes to hit it. Please stop putting that information out there. Isn’t it enough to just keep stuff generic. For instance “try and be adventurous, don’t wait for him to always initiate things”. Why does someone feel the need to give you the details of how it goes down at her crib? No thank you, ma’am and please don’t be presenting ammunition to some undercover runs girl who just might download those details for her own ulterior purposes.

The advice session is meant to embody a gift of titbits of wisdom to the bride and one way to do this is to get a book to pass around to all attendees before the bridal shower, so they can write down words that the bride can return to and read days /years afterwards. You can put down a prayer, words of advice, even a favourite tried-and-tested recipe. It’s an advice session, not a sex-tips session and their lives will consist of other activities outside the bedroom. Enough said.

Favours
Personally, I think bridal shower favours are a very memorable touch to your event,and it doesn’t have to be extravagant. I once got a tape measure as a “thank you for coming”, which is still very much in use today. Something small and practical for the handbag or the home is a great idea; it also serves as a great memento for the bride-to-be.
Make up your mind early so you can get a good discount if you’re ordering from a supplier – remember what I said about budgets.

Information abounds on the interwebs about hosting amazingly fun bridal showers (and I didn’t even touch Hen Nights!) without involving an events planner. Apparently, in the U.S., men also get invited… how very contemporary!

What about you? What stories, experiences or tips have you got from the bridal showers you’ve attended?
______________________________________________________________________________________
Mz Socially Awkward does far too much legal reading and writing as part of her day job (for which she remains grateful to God!)… which means she’s too brain-fatigued in her spare time to create a blog. She enjoys observing everyday life as it occurs around her and being entertained by reality.

Mz Socially Awkward passionately bickers about contracts with other legal people, to justify her daily wage but when she’s not doing that, she’s belting out Gospel music in a couple of choirs , kick starting her “Soul Food” radio show on the church’s Radio31 station (scary!), hanging out with some other intrepid couch commentators on www.ourthoughtsandyou.com and idly daydreaming about the fashion entrepreneur she might have been if she hadn’t chosen this other life…. :-)If you want to discuss anything related to the above, you can reach out to her with the twitter handle “@1LifeSaved”.

98 Comments

  1. Deedee

    October 31, 2013 at 11:21 am

    Thanks for the tips hun….

    • Mz Socially Awkward...

      October 31, 2013 at 11:44 pm

      Thou art welcome!

  2. B

    October 31, 2013 at 11:27 am

    you’re a life saver!

    • Mz S.A

      October 31, 2013 at 11:46 pm

      Glad to have helped in any way, hope whateve you’re planning is a hit!

  3. SwanSoSweet

    October 31, 2013 at 11:44 am

    From the comments you often write on other articles, i’ve always wondered if Mz Socially Awkward had a blog, you write so well.On our blog swansosweet.com, we are crazy about all things related to bridal showers and hen parties. I agree that bridal showers are becoming increasingly poplular in Nigeria.I defiantely agree with your advice on the budget; neglect this at your peril.
    For anyone thinking of planning a bridal shower, have a look at our blog (swansosweet.com/) we have tons of articles to get you started.

    • Mz S.A

      October 31, 2013 at 11:51 pm

      A Naija blog which caters to bridal showers sounds really innovative, you’ll be a great go-to resource for ideas tailored to our unique environment… Shall save details of your site to pass on..

  4. cisca

    October 31, 2013 at 12:06 pm

    WHew!…you just saved me mehn!….thanks

    • Mz S.A

      October 31, 2013 at 11:53 pm

      Yay! 🙂

  5. AstonishingTee

    October 31, 2013 at 12:24 pm

    I’m planning a Kitchen-Themed bridal shower for my BFF this weekend. To be honest, it’s been tough; none of the bride’s supposed friends dropped a dime. Only three of us; myself, the bride’s sis and cousin are footing the bill….well, to make it memorable for my dear friend, I’ve invited some of those who refused to pay….on the condition that they come along with a Kitchen Utensil as a gift for the bride.

    • Mz S.A

      October 31, 2013 at 11:57 pm

      I “yam” thiefing your kitchen themed idea, it sounds soooo practical & your bride will be happier for it. As for the guests who don’t drop money… Forgive them, it’s not as much in their interest as it is in yours to make it a great day for her. I feel your pain, though.

    • Hilda

      November 1, 2013 at 5:00 pm

      Hey Tee!…Is there way to contact you please? I make fruit displays for bridal showers and other events.I will be very flexible to your budget.

  6. Abby

    October 31, 2013 at 12:28 pm

    MSA,thank you for the great bridal advise, and BTW i enjoy
    reading your comments 🙂

    • Mz S.A

      October 31, 2013 at 11:58 pm

      Thank you for yours! 🙂

  7. Bleed Blue

    October 31, 2013 at 12:35 pm

    Mz Socially Awkward has finally written for BN!!!!!! Yay! You are too much!!!

    Can’t wait for your own bridal shower jor! We will ROCK IT TILL THE MAYOR OF ABERDEEN PERSONNALY BEGS FOR MERCY! 😉

    • Mz S.A

      November 1, 2013 at 12:03 am

      HAHAHAHA!! You’re a crazy “bebe”, but I can picture that scenario and that’s what’s up!! 🙂

  8. TA

    October 31, 2013 at 12:45 pm

    My one and only MZ Socially Awesome nee Awkward! You wrote an article for BN?! Never thought I would see the day,LOL!
    Great article ,plenty plenty useful tips. I shall bookmark this article. I have a bridal shower to attend in less than 2 weeks,this should come in handy. Thanks darling,please keep them coming. *Muah* 🙂

    • Mz S.A

      November 1, 2013 at 12:08 am

      My one and only TA, I dipped a toe in, thank you for taking time to read! Hope the shower is fun for all of you.

  9. Anita....

    October 31, 2013 at 12:46 pm

    lol @ undercover runs girl…

    • Mz S.A

      November 1, 2013 at 12:11 am

      You go fear who-and-who don gather for there…

  10. Berry Dakara

    October 31, 2013 at 12:50 pm

    Oooh, I think you should add one more thing: The Guest List
    Make sure the ladies invited to the bridal shower are actually also
    being invited to the wedding! In addition, get a feel for the
    bride-to-be’s circle of friends. If she’s quiet and doesn’t have
    that many friends, you can always do something simple with just 3
    or 4 ladies. It doesn’t have to be a crowd.
    http://berrydakara.blogspot.com

    • TA

      October 31, 2013 at 5:02 pm

      100 likes 🙂

    • Mz S.A

      November 1, 2013 at 12:15 am

      Great looking out, Anita. In fact, if there are only 3-4 of you, I strongly recommend a getaway if you can afford it. Forget going to the Maldives; your little group can head away to a local resort outside your town for the weekend and make it an event she’ll remember for good.

      I hope yours, when it comes round, is a hoot!

  11. Fab all the Way!

    October 31, 2013 at 12:55 pm

    @ Mz Socially Awkward … gud on you for writing this!
    Enjoy your comments on other BN articles! xoxo.

    • Mz S.A

      November 1, 2013 at 12:16 am

      Thank you and thank you! 🙂

  12. Abana

    October 31, 2013 at 12:59 pm

    I have a silly question. With all the very many bridal and
    wedding features, there is no doubt that people successfully date
    in Nigeria. I have a very strict father. Army drill strict
    upbringing. I will be home for Christmas as would my significant
    other. I intend to spend a couple of days at his in addition to
    regular late night dates. My issue is this – how do I tell my
    strict father I am going to my boyfriend’s house? I don’t buy the
    lying techniques I have been hearing. I am not a baby! I feel my
    parents should know where I am. So girls living in Nigeria, what do
    you tell your parents when you are going to spend the weekend at
    his? What do you tell them when you are going to an 8 or 9pm dinner
    on the island especially when you live on the mainland? I apologise
    if this sounds silly, but when I imagine the look of incredibility
    of my father’s face when I say I am going to spend the weekend at
    my boyfriend’s, I need to hear people’s experiences. PS, if you are
    going to come back with why should you stay over at your
    boyfriend’s, fornication is a sin, blah blah, please save it! I
    holy pass you.

    • I formerly known as Miss Anonymous

      October 31, 2013 at 1:22 pm

      The truth is your dad may not agree with you wanting to spend the night (not to talk of an entire weekend) with him. These parents of ours probably know we are not that innocent but still prefer to live in lah lah land.
      So save yourself the stress and tell him you are spending the weekend with your old friend, Miss Anonymous 🙂

    • Abby

      October 31, 2013 at 2:17 pm

      Sometimes parents have to loosen up a abit life is not that serious especially when one is an adult.anyws back to the matter…if i want to spend time at my boyfriends house, i would tell him in advance that i will be away with my girls no stories lol

    • slice

      October 31, 2013 at 3:20 pm

      you say your bf will be home for christmas too so I’m assuming if you’re going to visit him, you’ll be visiting in someone’s home (maybe his parents). it may actually be in your best interest not to spend the night there. as ancient as it sounds, your parents are just trying to protect your reputation. His parents may also think of you a little funny too if you spend the night with him. You’re only there for a little while. soon you’ll be back to your base and you can continue to spend the night with him. save yourself long story.

    • Que

      October 31, 2013 at 4:04 pm

      If u don’t buy the lying technique cos u’re grown then u shld kno u already answered it right there, u didn’t need us. U tell him exactly where ur grown ass will be and handle d post-telling drama as dished by him. Wat else can dere be to it. #next!

    • to abana

      October 31, 2013 at 4:54 pm

      You don’t like peace in your life abi. Some girls and unnecessary drama. See it like this. Your dad hasn’t seen you this year I am guessing. You are still unmarried and coming to stay in his house I am guessing too. Your boyfriend that you have been seeing everyday where you live. The 2 or 3 weeks in 9ja for xmas would not kill you if you don’t spend the night. You are likley going to be seeing him in 9ja everyday anyway, how much difference is spending the night with him worth all the drama of the conversation with your father. Can he spend the night in your house? The answer is NO, then why should you think you can spend the night with him, in probably his parents house. If you don’t have any respect for your dad’s sensibilities andyou make up a story, have you considered the people whose house you will be spending the night and the impression of yourself you are painting? In our bid to act all we are big girls, grown up, adults and all that ish, as long as he is not going to be spending his time in a hotel or something, sit your ass down in your papa house. It is just for 2 or 3 weeks, your relationship will not suffer and it doesn’t mean that hanging around him all the time will spare him from the claws of Lagos girls. Guy that wants to runs babes will still runs babes. Enjoy your holiday with your family and don’t create unnecessary tension. As @slice said above, you also have your reputation to protect. Do what you like abroad, when you are at home put the extra effort to keep up appearances. You owe your parents that at least. They raised you well, sent you abroad and all. Don’t now come back and be rubbing I am a grown woman (enter beyonce’s song) in their faces. The fact that your significant other will agree that you spend the night in his house, speaks volume about the level of respect he has for your father. Think about that. You are 25 girl, it is too early to be on your daddy’s not so good side. You are still his baby, give him the peace of mind of knowing you still respect him enough to “pretend” that you are still his baby

    • TA

      October 31, 2013 at 5:11 pm

      1 ZILLION Likes! May you live long. Your head is too
      correct abeg. *Muah* 🙂

    • G

      October 31, 2013 at 5:35 pm

      oya chop knuckle!!!!! 1 million likes…u and slice have brains…oyiara babe
      ” if you are
      going to come back with why should you stay over at your
      boyfriend’s, fornication is a sin, blah blah, please save it” fornication is the reason your father wont let u sleep over at your man’s house…I pray he flogs u

    • Idak

      October 31, 2013 at 5:51 pm

      The girl dey arrange Christmas copulation for October ending.
      Talk about making plans 🙂

    • Abana

      November 2, 2013 at 1:05 pm

      Wow! I came back so late I see. Thanks to everyone who supplied an advice. But your assumptions could not be further from the truth. We do not live in the same country. He has been working in the middle east for the past couple of months. I have only seen him twice in the past 8 months and both times, very briefly. He has a flat in Lagos so there’s no need to stay with family.
      Miss G! – the reason I said people should hold off on the fornication comments is because it would have been unnecessary! This legs have never been open for business and it will be so until I get married! There will no be copulation in my yard! Idak you hear????
      My spending time with him this christmas is very important to me. Cos I don’t get to see his face often. Thanks though!!!

    • Idak

      October 31, 2013 at 5:48 pm

      Do in the daytime whatever it is you intend doing overnight at his place.
      In addition,simply tell your dad you are going to see a friend and come back before lights out or dinnertime as the case may be.

    • Mz S.A

      November 1, 2013 at 12:30 am

      No, it’s not a silly question, you’re just being honest. I have to agree with Slice and To Abana. Don’t ruin what would have been a great holiday and visit home for something which really is negligible when you put it in context. You’ll both still be in a relationship, even if you don’t spend nights and weekends with him. Spend that time with your dad and family instead, I don’t think you’ll regret it. Some of us dey regret as we no fit go Naija this Christmas…

  13. mofe

    October 31, 2013 at 1:09 pm

    @mz socially awkward…nice article bout bridal shower

    • Mz S.A

      November 1, 2013 at 12:32 am

      Many thanks!

  14. Mz S.A

    October 31, 2013 at 1:10 pm

    Thank you, all! First efforts are always a bit of a nail-biting affair… 🙂

    One or two additional tips I didn’t put in there (word limit tinz) – if you’re struggling for a theme, tap the bride-to-be’s family and fiancé for tips on what she’s interested in (e.g. musical eras, hobbies, etc). And your bride can earn a gift from the shower if you get her fiancé to give you a list of questions for her and a promise to buy her something nice if she scores a high percentage correctly.

    We did this with a friend and her hubs got her a Burberry bag she wanted … albeit 1 year afterwards… (Brides, make sure to strike while the iron is hot)

    • Abana

      October 31, 2013 at 1:18 pm

      Well done hun!!!

    • slice

      October 31, 2013 at 3:12 pm

      Well done “Mizzy.” all very fun and useful tips

    • Tincan

      October 31, 2013 at 4:55 pm

      Well done Missy… I’ve done a couple of bridal showers and I have to admit games and good grub always does the trick. Also like you shared I once attended a bridal shower where one of the attendees proceeded to regale us with the stories of how you have to be ready when your husband is ready for action and how once she had to ‘give it’ whilst breastfeeding her baby. I was so disgusted. Tip # 6: Best for attendees to be of similar social orientation/generation. Those Aunties that come and tell you all the horror stories just kill the vibe.

      Next stop baby shower in Dec… The webby is replete with ideas.

    • Ekwitosi

      October 31, 2013 at 8:24 pm

      MSA great job on your first article!!!!! Ok the other issue I still don’t understand is the idea of men attending bridal shower in our community in the States. In fact bridal shower in our community in America bothers on ridiculous! I mean it’s almost like a wedding party. I thought the idea of a bridal shower is for the bride’s CLOSE girlfriends to wish her well in an intimate party as she leaves spinsterhood. You know a place where everyone can throw it down and give advice, if there are men there nothing useful maybe said. I guess it’s all about any excuse for a party since people just work! What do you guys think about men attending bridal showers?

    • slice

      November 1, 2013 at 12:18 am

      i think it goes from community to community. we’ve never
      had guys at any of our own bridal showers in the states

    • Mz S.A

      November 1, 2013 at 12:42 am

      Thank you ladies!
      @ Tincan, those are the kinds of stories that stay in your consciousness and every time you see the couple now, one particular image keeps returning to your mind. And I’ve never invited Aunties, although I know they may be the mix, depending on how close their relationship with the bride is. My Oyinbo galpals normally invite moms to their hen parties, which is sort of the same principle.

      @ Ekwitosi, I agree, it won’t feel as relaxed to me if the guys are there and I think they can maybe join in later on in the day but I won’t really think of planning a shower where they were present from the jump.

  15. Curious Cat

    October 31, 2013 at 1:27 pm

    ms S.A funny chick where is offilllllllli

  16. zamunda

    October 31, 2013 at 1:33 pm

    Yaaaaayyyy!!!Mizz socially awkward finally writes 4 B.N.you rock gurl!muaahhhh
    I and most of ma friends are not close 2marriageable ages so I’d save d info 4future use.

    • Mz S.A

      November 1, 2013 at 12:46 am

      @ Zamunda, you don’t know how much it warms my heart when I see young girls in Naija admitting they’re not yet “close” to marriageable ages. Often, the reverse seems to be the case…

      Thanks and when your time is right, be sure to visit SwanSoSweet’s website for great ideas!

  17. Lizzy

    October 31, 2013 at 1:35 pm

    I think the guest list is the most important part of a bridal shower. Once they are true friends (of the bride not the planner!) then they already know what she likes. Planning and funds will be a breeze.

    • Mz S.A

      November 1, 2013 at 12:49 am

      Lizzy, you’ll be surprised… But you’re correct, that’s what it should be once you’ve sorted out the highly important matter of who’s attending.

  18. nikkydiva

    October 31, 2013 at 1:44 pm

    Useful tips, thanks to MSA, can someone give tips for baby shower, have one coming up in few weeks. Need ideas as a chief planner

    • Mz S.A

      November 1, 2013 at 12:52 am

      I’ll tell you one thing to not do – never ask the guests to lie in wait for the mum-to-be and shout “Surprise!”. I know someone who went into premature labour a short while after her surprise baby shower (mum and baby are doing great today, though) 🙂

    • Happy baby

      November 2, 2013 at 12:55 am

      All I can say is WOW

  19. Ene

    October 31, 2013 at 2:56 pm

    Nice article MSA, I’m planning a shower and I don’t know the kind of games to include, pls give me some tips.

    • slice

      October 31, 2013 at 3:16 pm

      Take your pick from the 21 or so games here. http://weddings.about.com/od/theweddingparty/a/ShowerGames.htm
      i like Toilet Paper Wedding Dress, which celebrity couple am I, have the bride leave the room and have people try to describe what she was wearing, write your favorite memories of the bride and have the bride try to guess who wrote what

  20. natty

    October 31, 2013 at 3:31 pm

    thank you Mz MSA. my latest experience in a bridal shower happened a few months ago. the bride gave a friend of hers the task to plan the shower. the friend came and said ” everybody pay 10k each”,. we were about 20 in number for the shower, no list of activities, or things that the money will be used to buy. see fight na, the friend in question was like ” what is 10k that all of you are complaining about”. In the end, to save the bride stress everybody paid.

    The day of the shower, lo and behold, the 200k budget according to the so-called friend could only afford 3 fruit juices, 2 bottles of eva wine(not sure of the name sha, but it won’t be more than 1k) and a tiny cake. nobody still complained to the bride about her so-called friend, talk about considerate friends. half way through the shower, the friend ran away. I’m sure she didn’t want us to arrange her fuck ups.

    • I formerly known as Miss Anonymous

      October 31, 2013 at 3:56 pm

      That’s one chance!

    • Tincan

      October 31, 2013 at 4:44 pm

      Rarr!

    • TA

      October 31, 2013 at 5:00 pm

      Oops! Sorry about your experience. Na wa for some chics sha! There is nothing wrong in asking for what you are paying/contributing for. Am sure you’ve learned your lesson sha…
      You see this is why whenever am organising a shower ,I personally get the contacts (email and phone numbers) of the guests to the shower (someone already mentioned the importance of making sure they are also invited to the wedding). I send them the entire event plan, from venue,what to wear to the shower,and invite them to let us know their thoughts on games,Music and dancing,refreshments, and other fun activities at the shower. Of course we can not cater to everyone’s whims but the greater majority decides what will eventually happen at the shower and of course no one feels like I didnt have fun or cheated.

    • natty

      October 31, 2013 at 9:21 pm

      I have learnt my lesson, for my own wedding I am not asking anyone to contribute anything and I will give it to my sister not a friend to handle. Let me see my sister trying to pull that kind of stunt first.

    • Mz S.A

      November 1, 2013 at 12:55 am

      Na wa oh, na so she find money reach? On top how much, to lose your credibility?? I feel bad for the bride-to-be, hope her experience of the shower wasn’t completely ruined.

  21. Idak

    October 31, 2013 at 5:27 pm

    I actually opened this blog to look for a comment from her until I found out she was the writer of the article.
    Nwannem, no fall my hand for that invite o!

    • Miss C

      October 31, 2013 at 5:49 pm

      I actually think you two should hook up 😉

    • Idak

      November 1, 2013 at 8:21 am

      My sister wey i don already give tailor (i no get designer) measurement for her aso-ebi? We don pass that hook up level.

    • Mz S.A

      November 1, 2013 at 12:58 am

      @ Idak – Nwa nne m, “beht” why shall I purpose to do such a thing? 🙂

      @ Miss C, Idak is my “brah” *shines teeth*

    • Autoprincess

      November 1, 2013 at 11:19 am

      Awwww, Idak and Mz S.A, I like your sistmance (yeah, like
      bromance). It’s nice to see sisters this way. Anyways, is there a
      kind of shower you through before the 10th wedding anniversary of a
      friend?? That is the one I am looking for, lol.

  22. Stella Kashmoney

    October 31, 2013 at 5:42 pm

    Nice post. Well done.

    • Mz S.A

      November 1, 2013 at 1:02 am

      Thanks, Stella. Nice blog, I’ve been 🙂

  23. hannah

    October 31, 2013 at 6:51 pm

    i believe bridal showers are cool. the aim are for the bride friends to organize one for her. well we all know naija girls can be stingy (especially if no guy has given them a ring) so the point is :

    1) either you organize one for the bride (your friend) and have a lovely time, which everyone must donate. MUST OOOO! unless don’t come.
    or (2) if the bride doesn’t it by herself , pls and pls … every girl MUST come with a gift. period! no matter how small the gift is , sha come with one.

    went for a friend’s bridal shower and most of her friends didn’t donate and also didnt bring gifts. so when the bride was opening gifts they just sat at the back and felt stupid (which served them right). they just came to eat cake and drink wine. they should have just stayed home. so ladies pls if you cant donate , bring a beautiful gift. its YOUR FRIEND’S bridal shower for crying our loud.

    • hannah

      October 31, 2013 at 6:53 pm

      sorry (does it…..)

    • Mz S.A

      November 1, 2013 at 1:05 am

      Chei, you’re harsh oh! Hahahaha!!

  24. OmoMakun-www.ankarafestla.com

    October 31, 2013 at 8:23 pm

    Finally Ms SA write an article! it was only a matter of time…lovely piece. I’ve had my own fair share of planning bridal showers, at the end of the day as long as the bride is beaming with joy, then you have achieved your goal. One major tip though is to never to over extend yourself, especially when ppl are not willing to chip in. Keep it simple in that case. Some times making it a lunch-bridal shower at a restaurant where everyone pays for their own food, isn’t a bad idea

    • Mz S.A

      November 1, 2013 at 1:12 am

      God bless you, Oma – as long as the bride is happy, you’ve done a job worth doing well. And the not over extending yourself – again, you speak the truth. Most brides just want some kind of break and opportunity to chill. The lunch thing is a great idea but depends on your crowd of invitees. We had one like that and there were complaints from certain quarters about the food and how it wasn’t worth paying all that money for. There’s no pleasing everyone, really so please the bride and as much of the group as possible.

  25. Middy

    October 31, 2013 at 9:56 pm

    It’s a friend’s wedding later this year and planning her shower has been filled with drama and all sorts, just because some certain friends feel like they are the Bride to be’s ‘Besto’. Insults and mean comments were flying back and forth on the group! Finally we came to a conclusion but only very few have donated any money and the group is now so quiet! Women and drama!

  26. Chic

    October 31, 2013 at 10:04 pm

    The best way to deal with the food and drink issue is to have everyone bring a snack or a drink or contribute a certain amount if they are not okay with it then they don’t have to come simple.

  27. Sunshine

    November 1, 2013 at 1:13 am

    Nice post Mz S.A! I know a great place to get bridal and baby shower stuff in Nigeria. It’s called Tiente and their telephone no is 08125541877, website add is tienteonline.com

  28. Lin

    November 1, 2013 at 3:03 am

    thnks for d tips… look 4ward to my friends throwing me one 🙂

  29. Phatgirlzbwinning

    November 1, 2013 at 7:01 am

    The only advice I have for future brides out there, is to invest in real friends. They are the key to having a perfect shower. When your bridal train consists of people who are self centered, u can expect a horrible shower or none at all. I cannot stress the importance of having real friends…..they will b the only ones that care enuff to put time and effort into a day focused on you.

    • Lizzy

      November 1, 2013 at 9:26 am

      you have hit the “koko” of the matter. Only real friends care! i particularly love showers so i make extra effort even when we’re not close. i had a friend that wanted the whole world at her shower, too bad they weren’t her friends, they didn’t donate, bring gifts, it was a mess! She cut them all off after the wedding. ONLY YOUR REAL FRIENDS CARE!

    • Ekwitosi

      November 1, 2013 at 3:25 pm

      @Lizzy that’s exactly what I think because bridal shower
      should be for the bride’s close friends because they are the ones
      that know her journey and will be willing to contribute in any
      shape or form. Even when they are not physically present they will
      still chip in.

  30. Idak

    November 1, 2013 at 8:14 am

    My sister wey i don already give tailor (i no get designer) measurement for her aso-ebi? We don pass that hook up level.

  31. Priscy

    November 1, 2013 at 12:44 pm

    Very Useful article Mz SA…expecting more articles from you

  32. Eve82

    November 1, 2013 at 2:38 pm

    Bravo Mz SA! btw can you please educate me on the difference btw bridal shower and hen’s night. I just recently started hearing about the later, and I’m wondering if it is an entirely new concept, or just same thing with a different I.D.

    Thanks!

  33. babysco

    November 1, 2013 at 9:59 pm

    O my father.Let people do bridal shower for me .Let my time come too o 🙂 haha Just kidding.BTW Nice Article Miz SA

  34. rubies

    November 1, 2013 at 10:48 pm

    yaaaay mz SA speaks up in an article. big big fan, the only
    reason sometimes i scroll thru 100 comments*covering face* look
    foward to more articles by you and i totally enjoy ur playful
    banter with Idak too.

  35. Madman

    November 2, 2013 at 2:09 am

    Won’t you all want to see a post from the one and only
    madman?

  36. Soum

    November 2, 2013 at 7:48 am

    Reading this write up and the comments just made my morning….thanks Mz S A for the useful tips….had my own share of bad belle friends whilst planning a friend’s shower last year.Some girls are just not nice and very stingy,bottom line is invest in good friends..
    And many thanks Mz Socially Awesome my special person on BN…

  37. honeymix

    November 2, 2013 at 4:39 pm

    @madman, jealousy jealousy na im dey worry you.

  38. madman

    November 2, 2013 at 6:03 pm

    How us jealousy worrying me? Can you read?

  39. Agidi_jollof

    November 2, 2013 at 7:32 pm

    It’s not fun When you’re last to marry in your clique of friends, you’ve suffered to plan a shower for them and then When it’s your turn they can’t be bothered. The typical naija “I am a married woman mentality “.

  40. pg

    November 2, 2013 at 9:29 pm

    Tanz for the tipss mz SA … any idea where to buy the
    bridal shower items?

  41. MsChief

    November 3, 2013 at 12:16 am

    All my friends have refused to get married oh and I cant
    wait to start planning bridal showers, hen nights etc. I have
    prayed, fasted, threatened, played the matchmaker… I am fed up!!!
    Please I need new friends, those that plan to get married soon
    sha

  42. Spicy

    November 3, 2013 at 6:38 pm

    Ms SA! Finally an article from thee! lovely tips…
    Am planning a shower for my friend whose wedding is in 9ja in Dec and i only know 2 of her friends in Aberdeen cos all the rest have moved back 🙁 I cant even get the other 2 ppl to contribute, its frustrating!

  43. AstonishingTee

    November 3, 2013 at 8:13 pm

    Hi Hilda, sorry! Just saw your comment. We already had the
    shower at Spur today. #sadFace#

  44. Shona

    November 4, 2013 at 9:20 am

    Nice tips….

  45. meeee

    November 4, 2013 at 12:33 pm

    Anyway, as much as I would want to, I know I’m not going to have a bridal shower or hen’s night for my wedding cos my sisters are so not bothered abt such stuffs and I dnt have any REAL friends (bunch of competitive pretenders), on the other hand I kinda envy my boo cos I knw his bachelors night will be fun cos he has such amazing friends… Nice write up Mz SA

  46. Fabulicious

    November 15, 2013 at 3:03 pm

    Wow, I was actually beginning to think that it’s compulsory. @meee.I’m on point with you. Personally I don’t care about them or is interested in having one.I just don’t see the point though.

  47. Makcit

    November 10, 2015 at 7:39 am

    I really found this post interesting and inspiring. Keep up the good writing madam. ?

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