When people are in a public place and you can hear people’s telephone conversations, you begin to ask yourself why you left your earphones at home. You struggle to stifle your mild irritation until you hear: “You know men now… they think with their penis!”
Eureka! You have a Banter topic for Monday.
During my short stay on this side of the divide, I’ve heard this statement said a LOT of times… and mostly by women. Not men.. the supposed owners of said penile-influenced thoughts. No! Women.
I thought about the men in my life and wondered how many of the decisions they made under penile advisement. Did my father decide to send me to school in Ilorin under penile direction? Did my brother choose his son’s school while guided by the stirrings of his penis? Ah! Could it be that my uncle built his Ogbomosho house after listening to the murmurs of his genitals?
I don’t think so.
Where did this assertion come from and how did it get so much traction that it has been passed down, over the years, from woman to woman? Did the first man whisper it into the ear of the first woman and thus began the trail of this interesting position?
So, I picked up my phone and buzzed my friend, Tej. ‘Do men think with their penises?’ He replied, ‘Yes and no.’
Ah ha! So there was a premise for the assertion. I had been looking at this from a completely myopic view. Tej went on to explain that a man might make a decision on something important if there was a possible prospect of sex at the end of the transaction. I asked if he would buy a car if it was possible that the car sales person was going to have sex with him. He said, not unless he actually was ready to buy the car. The sex would just be a bonus prize. ‘Would you send your daughter to XYX kindergarten because the head teacher was smoking hot and she winked at you at one of the Parent-Teacher- meetings?’ No, he said. Ahn ahn. So when does a man think with his penis now? Tej wasn’t being helpful, so I buzzed my ever faithful Mo. The repository of ALL (good/bad/evil/slimy) information on earth.
“Mo, do men think with their penises”.
“Women like to believe we do. But we don’t.”
I went on to tell him about Tej’s inexplicable Yes/No theory. Then, he explained that Tej was right in a way. According to Mo, if there’s a prospect of getting sex from the head teacher, a guy’s base instinct will be to push and push and push for the choice of that school. Even if the prospect of sex was a teeny-weeny glimmer. He would still try. He went on to explain that it is the same ‘Konji’ over logic that makes a perfectly sensible man to have unprotected sex with a woman he has only just met. Extreme horniness then takes the place of common sense. It isn’t that he doesn’t KNOW that AIDS is real, or that he really should strap up. He is simply acting along with his base instinct.
He, however, said he didn’t get why women kept saying ‘men think with their penises’ as if they knew for sure. I responded that I believed it is part of making excuses for a grown man’s actions or inactions. For instance, a woman who is with someone who is unfaithful would rather comfort herself and say it’s not his fault… his errant penis is leading him astray. The penis takes the blame.
It is this thing about the over-glorification of sex and all its ancillary components. The greatest of sins and the worst of crimes – almighty sex.
On the subject of penile gratification, there’s also the pre-supposition that upping your aesthetics game has a long term sexual reward. So if a man is driving a super dope car, and he’s dressed to the nines, it is for the prospect of taking home a hot babe. While a woman may argue and say she is looking hot for herself, a guy might more readily admit that he’s doing it for the honeys. Again, maybe this can be filed under thinking with your penis, since at the end of the long night out you might end up getting some.
It might be grossly unfair to limit the sum of a person’s thought processes to the urgings of one’s genitals. Would you be offended if someone said your entire thinking faculty was solely driven by your netheryaya. Do you think that men think with their penises? Does this issue of Genitals Over Logic affect women as well? Or does this lie solely at the feet of men?
Just for fun, what’s the craziest and most illogical thing you’ve ever done… driven solely by your desires. Goodbye, Common Sense. Hello Base Instincts.
Have a fantastic week ahead. Question the norm. Make someone smile. Be happy.
Peace, love & ONE cupcake! (Just because I smell Christmas in the air)
Photo Credit: Dreamstime | Lucian Coman