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Nicole the Fertile Chick: The Two-Week Wait

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It’s a song and dance…that two week wait. Before you know it, another one rolls by, and you have to decide how to deal with it each time. It’s such a peculiar time in a woman’s cycle, that is reacted to as differently as each woman’s personal situation.

For Ms Not-Trying-Not-Protecting (NTNP), she is happily oblivious of this window. Apart from the obligatory period of her menstrual flow, she breezes through her cycle, totally unmindful. She is often newly married, or married with a child or two, generally not averse to getting pregnant, but not breaking into a sweat about trying either. She usually does not notice ovulation, and is pretty much unbothered about the waiting game of the two-week wait. She is the one who is only alerted about a possible pregnancy when her period is delayed by a few days or even weeks. Sometimes, not even then.

These are the women you hear only found out they were pregnant after 8 weeks, or more. Of the various types of women in the TTC journey, she is arguably the luckiest. She’s the one who wins the lottery, without even having to buy a ticket!

Then there is the Ms I-Sure-As-Hell-Can’t-Get-Pregnant (ISAHCGP). This type of woman typically falls into 2 categories. You have the married woman who has put the brakes on childbearing, temporarily or permanently, or the single girl for whom pregnancy is not an option. These are women permanently in fear of their birth control failing them, or who have encountered some form of slip up in their ovulation window. They are usually very aware of this window and do everything they can to avoid sex at this time….but hey, mistakes happens! After the said slip-up or failed contraception, they spend the next 2 weeks in agony. They are permanently calculating, and recalculating, torturing themselves with thoughts of what could, or could not, be. For these women, the two-week wait is s.n.a.i.l slow. They are the ones who, during the entire two-week period, break into a sweat at odd hours of the day, suffering from panic attacks. As soon as they are able to, they take pregnancy tests. For those who do not have the courage for that, they are on full knicker-watch, waiting, hawk-eyed, for their period to land.

For those who do get their period, or a negative pregnancy test, their relief is overwhelming and they quickly return to their pre-2 week wait disposition, usually with a firm resolve to be more consistent with their birth control, or avoid any more slip ups…but more than half the time, they are usually back in this situation a few cycles later.

Then, there is the Ms Trying-To-Conceive (TTC)….the legitimate owner of the two-week wait, the one for whom this wait was actually designed. Ms TTC is aware of every single day of her cycle. From the first day of her period, through her period, she is aware of every itch, twitch, or feeling in her body. She keeps her body and mind prepped so that she and her partner can catch her eggies that cycle. She knows when, where, and how to have sex to ensure that they do not miss her fertile window. She covers her bases the entire time, right through ovulation. She does everything, and anything, to make sure the cycle is successful. She swallows fistfuls of vitamins and prenatals religiously, eats anything that even slightly hints at improving fertility, knows what positions will give her husband’s swimmers a better chance. Everything she can, she does! Then the two-week wait starts, and she transforms from a cool calculated lady with everything under control, to a hot, raving mess!

She is the one who knows the common symptoms, starting from 1-day post ovulation. She is the one who gets every pregnancy symptom in the book….the swollen painful breasts, the metallic taste in the mouth, the cramping, the aching….everything that is supposed to spell pregnancy, she gets! She is also the first to buy a pregnancy test. Halfway through the two-week wait, she begins to test, sometimes going through multiple tests a day, finding every reason to explain away a negative result. She holds out hope right to the very end…right up to the day when her period starts, signifying the end, or failure, of that cycle, and the start of a new one.
At some point in time, most of us have been each of these 3 women. Some are lucky to skip the Ms TTC phase, but for the growing majority, this is the phase we get to experience for most of our reproductive lives.

Even though I was Ms ISAHCG for most of my twenties today, I am happily Ms NTNP. Being Ms TTC for the first 3 years of my marriage drained me to the last drop of my blood. Now, I am too happy to not have to care about what foods to eat to keep my uterus warm, and all the other good stuff. Ms NTNP is what I will be until further notice ☺.

I look forward to the time technology would have evolved to such a point that this wait can be considerably shortened, and within a matter of days, one can know their fate. But in the meantime, we will continue dancing to its tune in a way commensurate with our individual situations.
So…..happy dancing ☺

Photo Credit: Dreamstime | Sam74100 

Nicole is a woman in her late 30s, with a passion for all things fertility related. She suffered infertility for the first 3 years of her marriage, and found it extremely isolating. After she had her kids, she started The Fertile Chick (www.thefertilechickonline.com) to create a community and happy-place for all women, in various stages of the fertility journey.

15 Comments

  1. don't know

    December 8, 2014 at 8:58 am

    Hmmm we go conquer this TTC journey in Jesus’s Name.Amen

    In the meantime and while I wait, I will enjoy our time together, see the world and prep my body as best as I can 🙂

    • Nicole

      December 8, 2014 at 3:12 pm

      That is absolutely the best approach, because truly, worrying gets us nowhere! Good luck!

  2. penelopeia

    December 8, 2014 at 12:38 pm

    The two week wait was hell for me, I could see pregnancy symptoms which I later came to know they were all in my head. i know its cliche but when I started my MBA two months into it then I fell pregnant; at the time we were busy writing mid-semester exams I did not have much time( doesn’t mean I did not think about it). My baby is 5 months old but I still kept that pregnancy test I did.

    Nicole can you write on the having sex part during TTC when you are not in the mood but you have to. I just endure some of these sessions and could not wait till it was over.

    • Nicole

      December 8, 2014 at 3:15 pm

      You just hit the nail on the head! I know too many cases like yours where pregnancy happens the minute you take your eyes off the clock. And as for that mechanical sex….tell me about it! Nothing takes the enjoyment out of sex than programmed TTC!

  3. Anonymous

    December 8, 2014 at 1:54 pm

    I’ll remain anonymous 4 dis post. I’ve been Ms TTC 4 almost 2 years till last friday! Saw 2 pink lines n av been doing d ‘shoki dance since oh! Lol! It’s been a nerve wracking journey. Love making had become an awkward task. I have come to know every rise in temp, every cramp, every change that practically occurs during each cycle. After having a miscarriage in d first few months after I got married, it felt like my body had gone to sleep, it took 6 months 4 me to realize something was wrong. I wasn’t ovulating anymore. Saw a doctor, did some hormone tests n we realized my prolactin levels were off. I was placed on Bromocriptine. Took that for close to six months, I was ovulating but my eggies weren’t growing to appropriate size. We switched to Clomid n hormone injections, I did 3 cycles n nothing. We decided to take a break n try I.U.I nxt year. I really couldn’t take a break. I had read about doing artificial insemination (A.I) at home with normal saline n a syringe. I got a bottle of normal saline from a pharmacy n prepared for the task ahead. Started taking prenatal vitamins, drinking lemon water and took 100mg Clomid from day 3-7 n waited for ovulation. As soon as I noticed it, I had to confess to hubby what I was planning to do. He wasn’t too comfortable but he knew how stressed out n emotional I had become n he was willing to do anything to avoid d month end waterworks. After trying A.I on day 14 n 15, d waiting game began. I started testing on day 26 by day 27 I saw that cute little 2nd pink line! I nearly ran out of my bathroom naked to do a victory dance on my balcony!
    So happy, so relieved n asking God 4 d grace to carry to full term!

    • peace

      December 8, 2014 at 5:31 pm

      BEST OF LUCK SWEETY , U WILL MAKE IT TO THE FULLEST AND U WILL SURLY EAT THE FRUIT OF UR LABOR

    • Nicole

      December 9, 2014 at 7:53 am

      Wow! I’m so in awe of you! The DUI artificial insemination is not for the faint hearted at all! I had considered it at some point, but did not have the courage to see it through. Huge congrats that it all worked out for you! Please ask your doctor if you need to be placed on progesterone suppositories, especially as you had hormonal issues. Good luck!!!

  4. Babym

    December 8, 2014 at 5:17 pm

    Hhehehe omg you just decribed me as im in the TTC phase. o boooy! my hubby has been telling me that im acting like a mad woman trying to track everything lol. but readinbg it here now makes me put things in perspective lol

    • Nicole

      December 9, 2014 at 7:53 am

      LOL! Don’t worry, you’re not alone :-). Good luck!

  5. EVA

    December 9, 2014 at 7:49 am

    Oh dear! Nicole you took me down memory lane. Thank God i can laugh about this today because God came through for me and i had my kid. O gal! it was not easy. I would have raped my hubby if it was possible cuz the man used to pick ovulating period, not to have sex. He would say he is tired etc we would quarrel for hours, i would insult him etc. I was a mad woman just like he used to say….lol i pride myself on being hard! so the 2 weeks wait never used to get to me. I would test and just move on. I did that for the first year then by the second year i started breaking down. Gal!!!! i would cry from the depths of my heart. God you are faithful, i just bless your holy name. I use this medium to pray for all of you doing the 2weeks wait.. It shall come to pass for you all in Jesus name amen. I do not wish my enemy that agony.

    • Nicole

      December 9, 2014 at 8:05 am

      Eva, I feel you 100%! Sometimes, I look back myself and can still remember those days like it was yesterday, sometimes even with tears in my eyes! We thank God for bringing us to the other side, and pray that others still in the waiting room are equally blessed!

  6. Anonymous

    December 9, 2014 at 2:42 pm

    Wow! Thanks for this post, Nicole. I’ve been ttc for 2 and a half yrs now. Actually went thru ivf twice! Got pregnant on the 2nd try and miscarried 2weeks after my bfp. I’m just done at this point and hoping for a miracle because I can’t allow my husband spend on it again. I have 3 frozen embryos but……. They said its blocked tubes, where that came from, I dunno. I shall be Mrs NTNP until something happens. I believe in miracles. Thanks again for this post

    • Nicole

      December 10, 2014 at 1:34 pm

      I’m so sorry about your miscarriage! Sending you huge cyber hugs! It’s good to be Ms NTNP for a while, to help you regroup, but before you do, you could try transferring your frozen embryos, because you never know. If you want to chat more you could send me a mail at [email protected]

  7. penelopeia

    December 10, 2014 at 10:28 am

    Hi Nicole, it is nice that women going through similar challenges gather here to share and off load some pressure. I had lots of support going to baby center (uk) on the “actively trying” board. If you can start a blog like that; I would join, in fact babycentre does not have an african section so it is hard to relate sometimes . Can this be done?

    • Nicole

      December 10, 2014 at 1:37 pm

      Thanks Penelopeia! That was the same problem I had as an active member of Baby and Bump, nothing relevant for me as an African. That was why I started The Fertile Chick (www.thefertilechick.com). It’s currently undergoing a bit of an overhaul, but you can stop by if you can. We’ll be glad to have you!

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