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Moses Obroku: Portrait of the ‘so-called Abuja Babe’

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I love Nigeria’s Federal Capital Territory, Abuja. I remember vividly, the first time I arrived there when I accompanied my brother and his family who were relocating from Lagos in 1999. We had taken a very comfortable double-decker luxury night bus, and when we entered Abuja just as dawn was approaching. I opened my eyes and saw the city. It was difficult not to love it.

The city was still relatively new, with a rough landscape, surrounded by dark rocks that seem to be watching over it like sentinels of a medieval age. Abuja’s beauty was breathtaking and for a moment I thought I was abroad; but, I also remember thinking, and getting sad that the city is so superficial, a one-off in Nigeria. After living there for many years, and even attending Law School there; I soon realized that there are many other superficial/exorbitant things and people to encounter in Abuja.

There is a long entrenched urban myth about the ‘Abuja babe’. The general consensus is that they are very expensive to be in a relationship with; they are mostly about the glamour, glitz, and all things money can answer to. In fact, it is whispered that the young and financially upcoming men who definitely cannot compete with the politicians and other top government workers in the town will have a rather hard time holding the interest of the Abuja babe. This generalization came up again recently, during a conversation with a friend of mine and I thought someone has to set it right.

There are two distinct groups of young ladies in Abuja. The first group consists of those who reside permanently there, probably grew up and still have families. The other group is made up of ladies who come into the town to ‘hustle’ for given periods at intervals. For the sake of clarity here, the former would be identified as the ‘Abuja babe’; while the latter as the ‘so called Abuja babe’. You see, if you are not fully informed, you will not easily distinguish one group from the other; which is what I think is responsible for the rather annoying over generalization about the Abuja babe over the years.

For the record, the Abuja babes – those who are resident there – are not the ones who commit all those well circulated atrocities you hear. No doubt, there are pockets of them who indulge in little runs bordering on the wild loose living, but there is only so far as they can go. Strong family presence will not let them carry on unrestrained. Oh, and many of them have regular work. They are the ones you meet in the offices of huge government corporations, institutions, Embassies of foreign Governments and other international agencies in Abuja, doing decent work for good pay. They are able to afford quite decent lifestyles too or their parents are top guns in the city with solid economic base providing the glam for them. From a biased distance you cannot tell them apart from the ‘so-called Abuja babe’ because the glamour and glitz are present in both. I have a feeling this bias has made some young men with weak self-esteem stay away from these ladies, choosing instead to join in propagating the urban myth about the ‘Abuja babe syndrome.’

The ‘so-called Abuja babe’ on the other hand, is a different story. She doesn’t reside permanently in the city. She is the roving financial predator who comes to town for extended periods to look for money. Some of them are students in the Universities and other higher institutions in and around the city. She is the one you will find at the bars of hotels in Abuja, dotting the tables of the affluent. She will never take you to her house. Do you know why? She doesn’t live in a regular home. I hear there now exists, various comfortable service flats, housing up to ten girls per apartment; with each girl paying up to 5,000 Naira per week for accommodation. If that is where the so-called Abuja babe lives, she will never take you there. And of course telling lies comes naturally, and is a critical survival tool to her. If you asked why you cannot visit her at home, she will tell you about a fictitious strict aunt or other non-existent family member that would frown at such visit. If you asked about what she does for a living, as soon as she opens her mouth, better brace yourself for another lie. She can conjure up the name of a firm without thinking about it.

The so-called Abuja babes, have never had any decent job before, and probably not interested in having one. Why should they? Politicians dole out cash that is not counted to them! I hear they also steal from one another in their apartments and steal from the men that patronize them. They sleep all day and come alive at night; nocturnal creatures indulging in the skin trade. It is common knowledge that they even go diabolical. They can do ‘jaz’ (juju) to hold the latest maga (male prey) who they deem rich enough to give them the big break. Men I hope you are taking note? When you shirk family responsibilities but buy that latest car for that babe you met not long ago, I beg check well again, she don carry your name and picture go somewhere.

The uninformed young man, who approaches the so-called Abuja babe for relationship, will before long take to his heels when the demands start coming. Until then, there was no way the poor guy would have known who he was dealing with. And depending on how these babes rate a guy’s financial capabilities, these demands are no joke; ranging from the petty like the purchase of bags and other material things to the heavy payments like house rents and even cars! The desperation with which they demonstrate their greed is phenomenal. More shocking is the fact that they even think they are more modest than their ‘Lagos babes’ counterparts, as those ones demand and obtain their own homes from their rich clientele. Some even own two,(yes… two) Range Rover SUVs. Hmmm, people should fear God o, and have sympathy for the generation of such men. (We may discuss the Lagos babes another time)

Interestingly too, these girls are quite educated, and usually pretty. Oh and they dress right and can hold their own at least as far as appearances go for any occasion. They love the city center and may not want to have anything to do with a guy who lives in a satellite town like Kubwa, Suleja or Nyanyan. But after sometime, the so-called Abuja babe realizes it’s time to settle down and she cannot find a decent man. Her craving for affluent living is her biggest undoing. She cannot imagine settling down with a guy on entry level pay, while age is creeping up on her. In any case the turf for ‘hustle’ is getting lost to fresher- younger looking- latest ‘so-called Abuja babe’ who has just emerged; thereby creating an unresolved dilemma for her to deal with.

How do you know an Abuja babe from a ‘so-called Abuja babe’? The distinction is in the details, and you have to look keenly. Suffice to say again, that every young, glamorous, successful looking female in Abuja is not a ‘runs’ girl. As for those Abuja babes who give the whole lot bad reputation, well, they know who they are…let it be.

Photo Credit: Dreamstime | Zdenka Darula

Aside from being a lawyer, migration management expert, security personnel and fitness buff; there are many other sides to me. I am also a self -proclaimed foodie (and oh yes, to complement that, I can cook!). Of course, writing is my passion and I have a mission to inspire my world, one person at a time. I can be reached on [email protected] Instagram: @mosesobroku

58 Comments

  1. victor

    May 21, 2015 at 12:48 pm

    well it nice expresion , and nice story as well nice to hear.

    • words

      May 21, 2015 at 6:57 pm

      “nocturnal creatures indulging in the skin trade”

  2. Otrizzy

    May 21, 2015 at 12:59 pm

    Very interesting .

  3. @edDREAMZ

    May 21, 2015 at 1:23 pm

    a.k.a EDWIN CHINEDU AZUBUKO said..
    .
    I don already made up my mind say na village my wife go come frm bcos gals this days wicked pieces…..
    .
    .
    ***CURRENTLY IN JUPITER***

    • aj

      May 21, 2015 at 1:56 pm

      lmaooooooooooo olodo boy!

    • Pretty girl

      May 21, 2015 at 6:51 pm

      They there na the ones way dey village na them worse pas

    • Ehiwarior

      May 22, 2015 at 1:08 pm

      I don already made up my mind say na village my wife go come frm bcos gals this days wicked …
      I seem not to understand your faulty syllogism “na village my wife go come frm bcos gals this days wicked” will your be an alien or hermaphrodite? or is the word wife contextual?

    • Ehiwarior

      May 22, 2015 at 1:10 pm

      I seem not to understand your faulty syllogism “na village my wife go come frm bcos gals this days wicked” will your wife be an alien or hermaphrodite? or is the word wife is contextual?

  4. Mz Socially Awkward...

    May 21, 2015 at 1:59 pm

    Curiously, I’ve been hearing about the recent emergence of a new social-species in the FCT, now more regularly known as the “Abuja boys”. Note that these aren’t the same as those powerbrokers and generally affluent males which that term used to belong to in the past (the word “big” is inserted between “Abuja” and “boy” to often separate the two groups).

    I would be very interested in a similar exposition on the new genre of Abuja Boys, for my own purposes…

    • Priscy

      May 21, 2015 at 2:48 pm

      Azzin ehnnn…the stories i have heard of ‘abuja boys’ are even worse.
      They are well dressed, handsome men looking for rich women( both married and single) to drain
      They don’t even mind getting married to you, as long as you pay their bills, they have a nice car to drive around town and can hang out almost all night.
      They are 10 times worse than the “so called abuja girls’ but society being what it is will only frown at the “so called abuja girls’

      Meanwhile, the “so called abuja girls’ I have seen at night on my few visits there can be so pretty, clean skin and what not and I wonder why such a beauty will waste on the roadside looking for any man who can afford her to ‘climb’ her
      I try not to judge tho, coz I do know her situation

    • Anon

      May 21, 2015 at 3:30 pm

      “They are well dressed, handsome men looking for rich women( both married and single) to drain.”

      You forgot to add that most of them are on the down-low. They are looking for both rich men and women to drain.

    • nene

      May 21, 2015 at 3:56 pm

      they’re also gay for pay. a lot of homoseuals in abuja, more than lagos.

    • Californiabawlar

      May 21, 2015 at 6:34 pm

      “….for my own purposes”

      One Abuja (?big) boy don dey toast our sister oh! ? 😛

      I

    • whocares

      May 22, 2015 at 11:40 am

      LMAO. THAT WAS MY FIRST THOUGHT ALSO!!! when I read that line ie.

  5. DAME

    May 21, 2015 at 2:11 pm

    I tell people oooo all the freaking time ” i am not an Abuja girl ” i work and live here….dassal …dont gimme the tag “Abuja girl”
    The Author is so correct….the way guys move sharply when u say u live in Abuja lets say u are visiting friends in other states….its like you r a plaque lools
    Oh well….There will be Ladies and there will be girls

  6. cindy

    May 21, 2015 at 2:13 pm

    What is this article? So a lady must have family in Abuja otherwise she is a “so-called Abuja babe”? So somebody cannot find a decent job there without being stereotyped? Please my fellow BN readers, ignore this dude’s rants. For someone who has lived in Abuja, I know this article is filled with lies and its purpose is female-shaming. He is talking about the class of people he moves with. Like they say, show me your friend and I’ll tell you who you are. If you haven’t lived in Abuja before and plan on going there, please do with an open mind and don’t let yourself be brainwashed. There are a lot of single ladies who earn their living on their own without family there and without the help of sugar daddies.
    And why do I find the undertone of this message disturbing? About the juju part, are you saying it’s okay for a man to cheat but he should shine his eye well well? Or am I the one reading too much meaning to that statement?
    To the author, is this how you plan on inspiring the world? What sort of migration expert are you? Is this what you tell your clients? Your mates are writing pieces that actually add value, you are here spewing nonsense. Writer my ass! Please take several seats.

    • purplegirl

      May 21, 2015 at 3:38 pm

      I think you misunderstood the article. He said that that their the so called Abuja babes and the Abuja babes. The Abuja babes being the ones who have settled in Abuja for a reason such as job or family, while the so called are there for a purpose which is just to make money off men.

    • wagamama

      May 21, 2015 at 4:15 pm

      Gracias! We that relocated to abuja for work nkor? Come add no family ties join! Thus I’m a “so called abuja babe”? SHEGE! (Forgive me lord!) Abuja is filled with different people! Some are permanent residents, ALOT relocated for credible work (both LOW and HIGH paying jobs), some come in to do business….e.t.c ABUJA IS NOT MADE UP OF TWO TYPES OF BABES!

    • mrs chidukane

      May 21, 2015 at 4:16 pm

      Oh thank you. My reply to the article was going to be “Mtcheew ” but I didn’t want it to be like I was being b**chy. Very annoying stereotypical article.

    • Lois

      May 22, 2015 at 12:17 pm

      I totally agree with you. I have lived in Abuja for 4 years now and have come to a realization that people especially young men enjoy this female shaming born out of their own insecurities and assumptions. This piece just seem to me as the “Omo onile”/ land owner vrs. long staying visitor rubbish kindda thing. And as my dear friend Dare will say, “assumption is the mother of all fuck-ups”; that was the case I met with Abuja. Abuja to me (as I have lived in Lagos most of my life) is just slightly different from Lagos. And its difference lies basically on the POLITICAL AND INFRASTRUCTURE landscape. That’s all. I even realized that Abuja girls/women are more modest than their Lagos counterpart. The difference only lies in access to government. All these stories nah wash. “Bi a nse se l’aye, be la n se se l’orun” (as it is on earth, so it is in heaven). The only difference i have noticed is with the young men. They seem to be on the prowl, looking for preys to hook. They have gigantic ambition with no pedigree and zeal to work for their own money. Come to Abuja, be open minded. Disregard the crap you read.

    • Uche

      February 27, 2016 at 6:27 pm

      Cindy, you are incredible. I love your wit. Go on girl.

  7. Babe who moved to Abuja

    May 21, 2015 at 2:18 pm

    You missed the babe who moved to Abuja to take up a decent job, who lives alone or with a flat mate and who doesn’t go after men for money… She is independent and looks after herself and hegemony back home

    • Ms John

      May 21, 2015 at 3:41 pm

      exactly! not all of us have our parents here buto we are working and living a decent life so I don’t agree with the writer of this article

  8. Babe who moved to Abuja

    May 21, 2015 at 2:19 pm

    Her family not *hegemony* damn autocorrect!

  9. oyinlola

    May 21, 2015 at 2:34 pm

    Erm…clears throat. And to think I craved relocation to Abuja for a very long time! On a serious note though since we are on the topic of myths and biases, why are people quick to reach conclusions about ladies especially because of a certain circumstance or the other?

    When people ask me the university I attended and I tell them OOU, you should hear the comments I get. Their body language is a mixture of all sort. Shuo, I shouldn’t be proud of my school again? They go, “omo OSU ni e. Ahhhhhhhhhh”. Like I should decipher what that simple statement means.
    Someone was asking me to date him at some point, quite older than me. Very married and when it turned into a skirmish, guess what his retort was. He said, “sebi omo OSU ni e, jasi now” (You are from OSU aren’t you, corporate now).

  10. Diddy

    May 21, 2015 at 2:37 pm

    @cindy do u ladies admit u cheat?nope,so in this article using men as case study is d best cos even when u know there r sugar mummues the sugar daddies outnumbers them and pls read his article once again,he categorized into 2,

  11. Diddy

    May 21, 2015 at 2:52 pm

    @cindy u know the writer can never talk abt sugar mummies,and u know the even if guys r rushing to the capital city is definitely not cos of women to feed them but instead they want to be a man and take responsibility,being said dat,the writer is talking about generalization of women in abuja being tagged under one umbrella,knowing fully well that all women r not the same,so i see noting wrong in his write up,i guess u got it all wrong,u have to know that everytin in this world we r living is always abt women,so learn to deal with it

  12. l

    May 21, 2015 at 2:56 pm

    @cindy abi oh! the same thing i was thinking about. but I’m guessing this article is for ones who actually do it!!

  13. ibhade

    May 21, 2015 at 3:12 pm

    Interesting…..

  14. Great Lady

    May 21, 2015 at 3:16 pm

    Dear Author, you got your analysis very right. You couldn’t be farther from the truth.

  15. papermoon

    May 21, 2015 at 3:22 pm

    This write up only enforces misconceptions people have about the kinds of women in Abuja. I believe our pieces should work towards removing stigma instead of reinforcing it. I think.

  16. ssah

    May 21, 2015 at 3:37 pm

    lol

  17. Ada

    May 21, 2015 at 3:46 pm

    Nice piece! However, you omitted one important group; the ‘corporate Abuja babe’. The one whose job has taken her to Abuja and you know she can very well hold her own.

  18. purplegirl

    May 21, 2015 at 3:48 pm

    I totally love this article. As a former Abuja resident i used to wonder where the notion of the abuja girls come from beacuse wallahi Ive never seen any. I just thought they were fairy tales some men kept telling themselves for being single in Abuja and not making an effort to search.

    Anyway the distinction is precise. there are Abuja girls and there are the so called Abuja girls.

  19. niri

    May 21, 2015 at 3:54 pm

    @ cindy……be calm I dont think u read d article well

  20. polypoly

    May 21, 2015 at 3:57 pm

    Moses – u sabi lie oh….double decker bus to ABJ in 1999?? which ones na…lol

  21. polypoly

    May 21, 2015 at 4:05 pm

    BN – shame on you for publishing this post. what a sexist article…..what the hell??? you called the “so called Abuja babes” roving financial predators – how cute and thoughtful! last I checked, these so called Abuja babes did not hold any innocent men at gunpoint oh. smh!! women will always get it worst. I just cant, I really cant today abeg….

    Moses – come here let me finish ur wanna be big boss head. claiming fitness enthusiast but I can see that fat oily face of yours crying for the nearest gym. hiss!!! you are def one of those hustler type guys that will hate on any girl that is living the good life.

    its just like going to Lekki and saying you want to treat a girl with talica standards, sorry boo but if u cant give her luxury, best believe we can affort it ourselves. No wonder when am in naija, u soo called Abuja/ lag big boys will call me “ashawo/ runs girl” when I turn you down.

    News flash – naija men are not all that. you wanna be runs boys but wont allow girls do the same. cmon gerraout

    • wagamama

      May 21, 2015 at 4:21 pm

      ****giving you sloppy wet kisses on both cheeks!****

    • puzzles

      May 21, 2015 at 4:35 pm

      polypoly, I just have to ask, are u a Nigerian or not? cos I saw ur comment on the article about dencia on house of maliq and ur comment implied a dislike (or hatred) for naija babes.

    • Meena

      May 21, 2015 at 8:40 pm

      LMAOO! All these monitoring Spirits though.

    • Anon

      May 21, 2015 at 8:46 pm

      puzzles – isn’t it obvious? Another one that comes here to gawk at the awesomeness of Nigeria and Nigerians. A very bitter person.

    • polypoly

      May 22, 2015 at 3:37 pm

      sweetie I am Nigerian okaaay!!! my love for dencia shouldn’t bother u soo much. and stop the stalking on all my comments

    • Thatgidigirl

      May 21, 2015 at 7:48 pm

      Kisses @ polypoly. I’m embarrassed that bella naija would publish something like this that looks like the minutes of a beer parlour gathering. Needless to say that it is extremely sexist and myopic. Who hurt you moses? Please look for her and get closure.

  22. thehermit

    May 21, 2015 at 4:21 pm

    Everyone’s opinion is welcome but let’s study the article before commenting.

  23. LamLam

    May 21, 2015 at 4:32 pm

    loooool! Calm down @Polypoly Are you one of em “so called Abuja babes?

  24. Jac

    May 21, 2015 at 5:03 pm

    I just believe dat all name tagging should stop. No Abuja babes, No Lagos babes. Nothing.

  25. whocares

    May 21, 2015 at 5:17 pm

    LOOOL. Orisirisi. How do you go about introducing yourself now if your name is simply not enough. and you have to distinguish your pedigree because you live in a particular city. “Hi, my name is Princess Consuela Banana Hammock, I live in Abuga, but I am an Abuja babe not a so called Abuja babe. You see I can trace my Abujaness all the way to when my great grandmother Queen Sheba moved to Abuja. Oh you should have seen it then, it was a desolate no man’s land, but my family and I, we built this city, we built this city on rock and roll and a bit of sweat”… I will stop now. lol

    • Jaygirl

      May 21, 2015 at 5:53 pm

      Lol! U are such a FRIENDS head!!

    • nwanyi na aga aga

      May 22, 2015 at 10:04 am

      loooool! Whocares you bad shaa! Moses you have filled this your article with a lot of “stereotypical cliches”. It is not so good. It was not balanced, you sound like a young man who had been turned down by a glitz and glamor babe and is trying not to whine in a beer parlor. One question I keep asking guys is, you see a babe shinning like the moon, in a society where it is believed that men are principal fund raisers/spenders in a relationship, Do you not do cost analysis? eg if the accessories on a chikala pass 300k, do you not ask your self if you can afford to dole out 200k in at least monthly basis to support this relationship before going? Or do you just go hoping all will be well. Cos a chikala such expensively adorned will not find Mr Biggs comfortable, na Federal Palace kind of babe, are you a federal Palace kind of guy? Or you just trust that your charm and beauty will lead you through? I dont know shaa but each time guys complain and I look into the matter, I always notice they went too high. If you introduce them to their level now they will start complaining, why is she on natural hair, she didn’t fix nails, She doesn’t drive? etc Well ihe di nma bu ego gburu ya..( Better thing na money kill am) Abuja girl or not Let water find their level..
      Secondly these babes get married faster than the good girls, I ve seen it happen plenty times. Their sugar daddies sponsor their weddings to Abuja boys who turn their face to the other side and Bellanaija features them.. Bella you know na..Looool! Its a good world we live in

    • Ada Nnewi

      May 22, 2015 at 12:43 pm

      LMAO!!! Very silly article reinforcing negative stereotyping…So if you don’t take a man home you’re a runs girl…MSSSCCCHHHEEEWWW!..I will carry you to my house after you have carried me to your parent’s house…

  26. babygiwa

    May 21, 2015 at 5:28 pm

    Loooool. Thou shall not ask the obvious.
    Nice article.

  27. krasavitsa

    May 21, 2015 at 5:35 pm

    Interesting article which sadly borders on sexism. Personally, if I worked or lived in Abj with my folks, I’d be insulted if I were ever called an “Abuja babe”. That I think is a misnomer as it lumps the runz girls, cheap prostitutes, daddy’s lil’ princesses, very hard working ladies and Corporate prostitutes together. And frankly, I understand why the ladies are complaining. I never heard of the term “so called Abj babe” before now (I just classified all girls that hustle as Abj babes) and I prefer saying “she lives in abuja when talking abt a daddy’s lil’ princess or a lady working honestly in abj. PS: Having a Rich married bobo that spends serious cash on you, isn’t honest living whether you work or not. BN abeg, I used serious finger-energy for this long talk.

  28. kemi

    May 21, 2015 at 9:32 pm

    i loove. i am definitely an abuja babe though. lol. please analyze abuja boys, lagos boys, lagos girls, Returnees(returned from the uk guys and babes). the list goes on

  29. ogeAdiro

    May 21, 2015 at 10:33 pm

    The problem is the gang of criminals popularly known as politicians. What a runs boy or girl does with his/her body and time is their business (minus juju). Reduce the number of useless politicians and I bet you’ll see a drop in the number of your “so called Abuja Babe”.

  30. mamamia!!!

    May 22, 2015 at 1:15 am

    Let me get this straight, I am a grown ass woman who has lived all her life under her parents roof and decide to move out and go “hustle” , I then look for the best options to start a new career based on safety, opportunities or just preference and Abuja fits the bill. I then move out with my parents “monetary” blessings they get me a car and secure an accommodation for me. I then begin to “hustle” for a legit job or starting a legit business depending on what my forte is hoping I get that big break. Does that then make me an Abuja girl? Seeing I have no source of income but live comfortably. I guess all them actors in the USA or the UK who have had to move from their small towns to places like LA, New york, London or even Lagos with no source of income in hope of making it big should have a label as well. We need to stop with this nonsense. While I understand the writers point, you made it so difficult to understand by limiting the term to either of the two options. Like, people need to stop with the Judgements and stigma attached to the way people live their lives and for the men them, if una no fit take the heat, leave! Simple.

  31. Runs girl

    May 22, 2015 at 9:56 am

    So many “so called abuja babes” here vexing o

    I wish BN would allow pictures to be posted under the comments section, would have gone out this night to get more than enough proof of this.

    Moses lemme add some more under the so-called abuja babes

    Abuja babes- the good girls,, working, got their money, either alone/relocated or with their parents

    So called Abuja babes- comes in every week to make money, sleep all day come out at night, *working and yet doing runs-dem plenty. They are good during d day and in their offices but still see dem on d streets at night, can sleep with anyone and anything to get money, all over the lounges, clubs and street. They do both men and women. Animals better pass them as animals will take cover but these ones stand in isolation in d darkest and strangest places no real human being would stay. Friends of the night.

    • Ada Nnewi

      May 22, 2015 at 12:46 pm

      Girls that get money from their parents that steal government/the citizens money should have a label as well…

  32. Louda

    May 22, 2015 at 5:34 pm

    I came to Abuja few years ago because I got a very good job here. when I came the only music a friend of mine was singing in my ears was Abuja men this, Abuja men that! For Gods sake, I didnt come to Abuja cos of men. I hear Abuja is full of fake people, I have met only one in my office but up till now I still cant say I understand this town because my work is so tasking that I dont have time to hang around, good thing is the job pays better than oil company job so aint complaining. Abuja is the pl;ace to be period. Very clean and cool town free of Lagos traffic and loud agberos shouting all over the place. Ladies please be focused, any babe wey go marry go marry, whether you live in Abuja or Kafanchan. Just be good and hustle in a clean way and Baba God will not leave you hanging!

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