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Laiza King: 5 Kinds of Toxic People to Stay Away From in 2016

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The New Year is upon us and everyone is super hyped on their resolutions. From losing weight, starting a business, going on trips to Hawaii and the Maldives, to growing a new brand – we’ve all been swamped with whispers of so many goals from our friends, family and even randomly on the internet.

However, setting goals are as important as creating a strong support circle that will help you achieve your goals. Having a supportive team and staying away from toxic people will most likely help you achieve more this year.

Toxic people generally do not understand the value of your goals or opinions, and thereby create strife, stress and a negative environment.

I’ve learnt that these set of people will do their best to bring you down, even unconsciously because they’ve allowed a negative mindset and culture to dominate their subconscious.

However, it’s possible to overcome their vibes this year by spotting them right before they conquer you. Let’s look at five kinds of people you should stay away from this year if you really want to manifest your dreams.

The first on the list is:

Dream Crashers
Sometimes dream crashers are actually people closest to us. This fact, I’ve come to learn over the years through my person experiences. While you might be enthusiastic about your vision and dreams, you must understand that not everyone will connect with it.

In fact, some might think you’re probably not thinking right. And they’re ready to rain hail and brimstone to show you reasons why you can’t achieve those dreams. Most dreams die on their door steps just by sharing them with the wrong people.

You must understand that not everyone cares about you or wants the best for you. Some people don’t even have a vision for their lives so they don’t feel the inner drive most purpose-driven people.

And since they can’t understand this drive, they’ll unconsciously drag you down their path of purposelessness.

Be clever enough to sight them from afar and find the fastest exit route.

Energy Squeezers
You need to maintain healthy and concrete relationships while giving zero concern to people who are experts at draining your energy, time and mental strength.

If you’re constantly surrounded by people who don’t support your dreams, but are always ready to take up space while remaining stagnant in their lives, then you’ll eventually become like them.

Be careful with people you hang around with because in order to fulfil your dreams, you’ll need the right energy to constantly inspire and motivate you.

The Naysayers
You know those that always have something negative to say about everything and everyone? We see them all around us, even on social media, on blog comments and sometimes in our inner circles.

It’s important to guard yourself from them and don’t allow them to keep feeding you with their negative venoms and short sighted mindsets. Protect yourself and inner circle from naysayers that could hurt your goals this year.

“Oh Yes” Members
There’s a popular quote that says, “If you’re the smartest person in the room, you are in the wrong room”.

It’s very easy to stay comfortable around people who don’t challenge you to become the best version of yourself.  What’s most heart-breaking is the fact that they say YES to every single opinion or question you put out there even when it won’t positively impact your life, just to stay on your side.

Now don’t get me wrong, it’s absolutely great to have people stand by you and support your opinions. However this shouldn’t be done at the expense of your next level, especially if you’re determined to grow and make changes this year.

You need people who are willing to be honest with you and also give you relevant feedback and constructive criticism because they desire to see you move higher.

Going to a higher level requires that you challenge yourself, learn new things, change your belief systems and sometimes change strategies. You’ll need to surround yourself with people who challenge you and help you grow in life, business and all round.

The Users and Parasites
From personal experience, I’ve been bullied in high school and I know how it feels like to be used by someone. There are always those toxic people who derive joy in using people and leaving them worse than they met them.

What’s most annoying about this act is the fact that they keep feeding from all the valuable goodness you have to offer, and then leave you hurt.

Don’t let them feed into you this year. But instead focus on those who help improve your general wellbeing as you also add value to them.

In conclusion
It’s time to leave these kinds of people listed above and stay connected to those that desire to see you grow and achieve more greatness this year.

If you recognize that certain people are draining your energy, discouraging you from your dreams, intentionally using you for their selfish desires, and generally always ready to crash your dreams – then it’s time to separate yourself from them and connect with the right people.

If you have such friends, you’ve got to let them go this year to move forward in life.

Photo Credit: Dreamstime

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21 Comments

  1. hadassah

    January 26, 2016 at 8:00 pm

    Fantastic read… very spot on. thanks.

  2. smackdown

    January 26, 2016 at 10:31 pm

    ebe like say i no go have friend for 2016 ooo

    • Laiza King

      January 27, 2016 at 7:06 am

      Loool! There are still so many amazing people. For the most part, you’ll attract who you are (in terms of values, attitude, etc). But setting boundaries between you and toxic people is very important

  3. Chichi

    January 26, 2016 at 10:55 pm

    Ha ha ha! Sometimes it’s like that @smackdown. Sometimes just taking a break, aka creating space and forming busy busy whilst you get yourself together can help. When you come back stronger, if these people are still the same at least u will know it was a good idea to stay away. I remember sharing an idea I worked for months on, just to share with one naysayer and just like that, it was the end of that project. Looking back I was already under confident so it was unfortunate that I met someone who had all the reasons to why my plan won’t work. These people are real, don’t be a victim! Good write up many people should take note.

    • Laiza King

      January 27, 2016 at 7:05 am

      Oh wow! I’ve had that same experience where someone literally ran down my project and it ended right there. Sometimes they don’t even know how toxic they are. Indeed such people are real and it’s high time we set boundaries.

      Thank you Chichi 🙂

  4. Bukky ( Quincy)

    January 26, 2016 at 11:32 pm

    Energy squeezers are just the worst mehn… they suck you till you are exhausted. I had one in my life, and I had to distance myself. We catch up now and then, but I just knew she couldn’t be a permanent fixture in my life. I refuse! Mba.

    Great article Laiza.

    • Laiza King

      January 27, 2016 at 7:03 am

      Haha. I’m glad you distanced yourself. Sometimes saying hi from afar is the best method. Thank you 🙂

  5. Toby Nwazor

    January 27, 2016 at 4:36 am

    Incredible post. I was just swallowing everything. This year eh, no time for nonsense. I think there is a saying that “it is better to be alone than to be with the wrong company”. It just about summarizes it for me. Good one there laiza. keep it coming

    “If you’re the smartest person in the room, you are in the wrong room”. That one got me. Omoh I need to start looking at some of the ‘rooms’ I go to o.

    By the way I am imagining you getting bullied. I thought that stuff was mostly done in boys’ schools. Na waa o.

    • Laiza King

      February 1, 2016 at 9:41 am

      Thank you so much TOby!

  6. Stephanie Anyadike

    January 27, 2016 at 5:26 am

    Great information Laiza! Its a new year and with that comes new opportunities & new ventures but in order to do we must position ourselves in the right state of mind and thinking. With that comes purging those that are hurdles to our goals. Great Articles! Doing a mental inventory of my ‘friend’ list.

    • Laiza King

      February 1, 2016 at 9:41 am

      Thank you Stephanie! Indeed its always best to reevaluate our circles and move on with those that add value and help us achieve our goals

  7. Mamacita

    January 27, 2016 at 8:14 am

    Interesting read. I have a small, read minuscule, circle of friends. I read this article wondering which group each fell into and whether the already small circle needs trimming. Then I, objectively, read it again to see which category I fall under and apparently I’m an “oh yes! Member”. I had very negative friends and dream crushers, in fact some where nightmare planters, many years ago and I always thought the best way to be a friend was to be a “cheerleader”. It’s interesting that this isn’t the case. I have some reevaluating to do.

  8. Bikom Patrick

    January 27, 2016 at 9:03 am

    An eye opening information to have on the journey of life, and not just for the new year. I’ve seen alot of them especially the NaySayers. They are always negative about everything and anything. They always see why something wont and cant work. Identifying such people around me has really helped me to know what and what to discuss with them and to be more determined in my actions and know exactly what i want and need.

  9. Asa!

    January 27, 2016 at 2:06 pm

    I’m glad I read this article….. spot on

  10. YUMMY CHICK CUM MUMMY

    January 27, 2016 at 2:52 pm

    righttalk there…………. n if u r such as mentioned above, rebrand………

  11. Kaybee

    January 27, 2016 at 6:37 pm

    The write up is so on point! Good job

  12. Ruth Neche Andrew

    January 28, 2016 at 5:12 pm

    I’m really glad I finally read this post.. I’ve been procrastinating for a long time..
    Awesome post Laiza

    • Laiza King

      February 1, 2016 at 9:38 am

      Thank you Ruth!!

  13. Anonymous

    January 28, 2016 at 11:02 pm

    What do you do if these toxic people are your nuclear family members?

    • Laiza King

      February 1, 2016 at 9:39 am

      Sometimes it best to just speak to them about their behavior and how it’s affecting you. Approach them in a kind and loving manner.

      At some point, if they still don’t adjust, just continue with your life without letting them affect your attitude and productivity. In due time, they’ll start acting like you. Positivity is contagious, trust me!

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