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Life Hacks With Toby: It’s Valentine’s Day & I’m Single… So What? Check Out 7 Ways to Maximise Your Enjoyment of the Day



dreamstime_l_30515819Is it possible to have a swell time on the special day of Love if you are not in love? It sure seems paradoxical, but you absolutely can. Well, you can’t if you are one of those fellows that think singleness is a disease of some sort.

I mean, there are many ways of having fun on Val’s Day. It may not be everyone’s idea of Val’s day fun, but fun is fun. And who better to show love on the global love day than the one you love most: You.

Below are a few ideas you could implement to ditch the moodiness and the mundane senselessness of worrying over ‘the curse of singleness’ (I wonder who created that phrase sef. “Curse of Singleness ko; Blessing of ‘Double-ness’ ni).

Spoil yourself; who better to love than you?
If I were a lady, I would go to the spa, and indulge myself in a full body massage…sweet. I will equally go get a manicure/pedicure, or stay in and order take out. Then I will take great comfort in the fuzzy feeling I get from taking excess cheap valentine chocolate (One day indulgence won’t make me gain 10kg, will it?) And who says I need a guy to buy it for me?

As a guy, I could take a trip; the more adventurous, the better. I could fly to a far-away state, go mountain climbing, or visit a forest reserve like the Ngwo Pine Forest in Enugu. I can send flowers to myself and laugh at my past failed relationships (I no go kill myself jare).

By the way, loving yourself is the first way to learn to love others.

Reinvigorate a forgotten hobby or finish a stale project
Whether you are a ‘single-single’, a single parent or divorcee, you probably have a hobby that you have neglected for a long time. Thankfully, this year’s Valentine’s Day is on a Sunday. That means, you ain’t going to work.

Personally, I used to play a lot of Scrabble, Chess, and Ludo. I could revisit those or snuggle up with a novel… not a romantic one of course. (Abeg I no wan spoil my mood with all those mushy-mushy thoughts)

Why not pick up your pen and finish writing that project. If you are savvy with the pencil, painting brush, or carving knife, create something. Try your hand at making a song or building a beat.

Turn Val’s day into raw cash
The worst days to be broke are December 25th and February 14th. Guess what, you can turn the tide a little on Val’s Day.

Engage yourself in productive work that can give you extra income. It’s Val’s day, so there will be a lot of partying and merry making. You can do home deliveries, offer cooking services, play in a live band, or even make use of your DJ skills that day.

You can equally offer to work the shift for any of your friends or colleagues who is busy with Val, and charge them a little dough. Just look for something temporal you can do to keep you from feeling lonely which will equally get you extra bucks.

If that is not taking advantage of Valentine’s Day, then I don’t know what is.

Take advantage of the mass misery
As an unwritten rule, every young man or woman has at least one single friend. It is never just you. And knowing that, has a way of easing the pressure.

You could decide to have a day out with the guys or girls. Visiting malls and bars in groups will ease the moodiness you might feel otherwise.

Have crazy fun together. You can all go play snooker, table tennis or go swimming. Laugh about your singleness and your failures in relationships. Perhaps even go camping for the day

Alternatively, you could have a day in with them. Order in, watch TV and laugh at the ‘silliness’ of all those people “in love”.

Take a trip backwards in the time machine and see what you can dig up
Locate your school year book, or the diary where you stored old contacts you haven’t seen or spoken to in years!

If you can afford to, make very long calls to these people that least expect it. It is usually enough amusement to hear their reaction when they find out who is calling.

This way you could stay in bed all day making calls, chatting or ‘skyping’. Find out the latest gists. Ask for who is married, who is still single, and who works where. Dig a little deeper and find out who is now a senator or a janitor, chief or thief. 

Send your love someone else’s way
This is the noble way to go. In the end Val’s day is about Love and there are a thousand people around you starving of love too.

You could decide to spend the day with your lonely mother or sick grandpa. Take them to see a movie or something.

I remember organizing a hospital visit on Val’s Day when I was in my final year. We included flowers among the items we bought. We told the patients that God sent us to tell them that He still loves and is still thinking of them. They were so happy and some almost cried.

Yours could be giving out some of your stuff or doing some work at an orphanage. Such exercises will leave you feeling fulfilled. Scrap that; you’ll feel like you just changed the world.

Figure out what you really want in a relationship
This is equally the best day for that very important self-talk. Have a chat with yourself, and ask critical questions. Why are you single? Na choice, abi na condition? Why did your last relationship fail? What part did you play?

Also think, decide and write down what you really want in your next relationship. And make sure you include the role you will play for it to come to pass.

In the end, love is beautiful. And who says you have to be miserable on the day of Love, just because you are single?

Your Turn
Have you ever been single on a Val’s Day? What was it like? What’s the craziest/greatest romance-unrelated thing you’ve ever done on Val’s Day?

Happy Valentine’s Day Friends!

Photo Credit: Dreamstime

Toby Nwazor is a free lance writer and motivational speaker who believes that life is meant to be lived and not just existed in. He is equally an entrepreneur with a lot of hands-on experience in business start-ups, marketing, and customer service. He passionately writes every Monday and Wednesday on about helping entrepreneurs and aspiring entrepreneurs build successful start-ups


  1. Teekay

    February 12, 2016 at 11:14 am

    I am single and was sugle last cal it wasnt a bad experience

  2. lolipop

    February 12, 2016 at 11:52 am

    Most valentine I remember I’ve bin single ooo and I am still gonna be single on sunday….chaiii but will definitely put all what you wrote into consideration. I know 2016 is my year and I am single yet making myself better for that virtuous man d Lord is bringing my way. Tnku Toby for the head up

    • Toby Nwazor

      February 13, 2016 at 3:37 am

      Thanks lolipop

  3. ss

    February 12, 2016 at 12:08 pm

    you guys make it sound like being single on valentines day is a disease or something

  4. [email protected]

    February 12, 2016 at 1:02 pm

    Lovely article. I have been single all my life, all valentine. Lol…
    And I was gadamn broke on Dec 25th and it is repeating it self this valentine, this time even worse…hahaha, but in God I trust!
    With all the excitement about valentine and all, I can’t sit on sunday thinking of what I want in a relationship. I guess I would just sit at home, complete assignments, read Bellanaija, sleep, and strategise for future plans.
    To those praying for a ring, I wish you the best. To those that expect a ‘yes’ I wish you the best.
    To other single people that wish they were not alone, do one thing from this article.
    To those of us that life struggle has left us not caring about relationships, valentine, God is our strength.
    Happy valentine to all BN readers!

    • Toby Nwazor

      February 13, 2016 at 3:37 am

      Kudos. Just make sure you have a great day, that’s what matters most

  5. Damzi

    February 12, 2016 at 3:12 pm

    I have a bottle of red wine…
    I have also placed an order for the tastiest finger foods..
    Fun friends over…check!!!

    Girls just wanna have fun!!!…

    • Toby Nwazor

      February 13, 2016 at 3:35 am

      No dulling. I like your spirit

  6. Missy

    February 12, 2016 at 3:21 pm

    Why must there be a special “enjoyment” of/on valentine’s day tori olohun? Is it Christmas? The hype about it is so much, it just wears one out.

    • Toby Nwazor

      February 13, 2016 at 3:36 am

      omoh eh, that question na WAEC question o. But that’s the way it is shaa. And I don’t think we can do anything to change it

  7. miss mo

    February 12, 2016 at 3:48 pm

    Valentine brings bad memories. I lost my V on a valentines celebration a couple of years back.
    And you can guess what followed..
    the day is over-rated abeg.
    .. Love is meant to be celebrated unconditionally, everyday. not on one day.


    February 12, 2016 at 3:53 pm

    Lol, I have never been keen on Valentines’ day -I wonder why people make a lot of noise about it (I’m married but we shall not be celebrating it because im working on the 14th – If i was not working I wouldn’t celebrate it()

    • Toby Nwazor

      February 13, 2016 at 3:34 am

      Different things matter to different people. I totally understand you. I’m sure there are other things you celebrate

  9. Tosin

    February 12, 2016 at 4:45 pm

    Love Toby.

    • Toby Nwazor

      February 13, 2016 at 3:33 am

      Is this “Love, Toby” or “Love (you) Toby”? Lol

  10. ElessarisElendil

    February 12, 2016 at 10:46 pm

    Put on your suit and play Football Manager. Currently leading Deportivo to greatness.

  11. memebaby

    February 13, 2016 at 4:11 am

    Had my first body massage today, went shopping, and ate a lot.. night don come and I felt so lonely for a second 🙁 .. well netflix and red wine till i pass out..

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