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Atoke: When the Ghost of Secondary School Past Haunts You Via WhatsApp

Atoke

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Third Image - EditedYesterday, I stared in amazement as my friend excitedly talked about her secondary school class group on Whatsapp. It was truly a first, to see someone that was actually happy to be in a Secondary School Alumni group. Everyone I know complains about these groups! So, who are the people still in them and why do they still exist?

Since the boom of Whatsapp and mobile instant messaging, the creation of groups on social media has grown widely. With Facebook, people you left behind in secondary school 20 years ago suddenly remember you exist and want to catch up. And when Facebook became ‘uncool’, people sort of migrated to Blackberry messenger, and Whatsapp.

But, why? If we haven’t been in touch in 20 years, why do we really need to start now?

There’s a Yoruba adage which loosely translates to: “Twenty friends cannot be friends for twenty years”. However, the progenitors of that saying didn’t factor in technological advancement and the app called WhatsApp.

WhatsApp is a blessing and a curse. Anybody with your phone number can contact you – with or without your consent. So, the minute someone from your old school class remembers you… you’re IN! No auditions, or protests are entertained.
You’re suddenly thrust into a room with people you thought you said goodbye to, when you finished writing your WAEC exams.

So, what are these groups for? Well, primarily to reunite – or plan reunions.
After the first set of felicitations and catching up is done, someone then suggests that something is done for the good old alma mater.

But, I’m jumping the gun a little. Let’s talk about the reunion process. You don’t really want to be reunited; or maybe you do… just to show those suckers you’re not the dork you were in school. You’re now a successful banker with a driver and a house in Lekki.

Immediately you are conscripted into this Whatsapp group of your old school mates, the first thing you notice is that you now need to charge your phone twice as much. Every body is talking. Strange numbers in weird, confusing colour coding pop up every second. People from different parts of the world are typing around the clock.
Messages come in spuriously, and everybody is trying to figure out who is who – match the phone numbers to the profile pictures.

A lot of my friends have never made it beyond this stage. As soon as they receive notification that they’ve been added to a secondary school group, they leave. No time to waste time. However, I asked some of the people who hung around, what their observations were about these groups, and why they stayed.

One day, there was 1670 messages in 30 minutes. I was confused

Those people blow up your phone with irrelevant photos. Please who cares about the fake LV Bag you’re selling?

It’s literally like the phones are manned round the clock what with different time zones of the participants

I find their gist entertaining. Some of the razz people from school are still razz. And they ain’t too proud to show it.

“The alerts keep going off at night. I had to leave the group

Ah… another Exiter!

In planning to rebuild a hostel in their former school, the Class of ’94 of a Federal Government college in Nigeria tried, and failed to pool their resources. After deliberating long and hard and how much they needed to gather, they had to nominate a team in their class to spearhead the project in campaign. It ended up being a messy fight; names were called, aspersions were cast, and accusations of financial mismanagement rocked the group.
Mini Nigeria.

Exit!

Apart from the inordinate volume of messages and the battery drainage, did anybody actually find any of these groups useful? Isn’t networking supposed to be a big deal these days? Surely these reunions are good for professional advancement. Maybe; maybe not.

There are no guarantees that you are the same person you were in Secondary school; there’s only so much reminiscing you can do about the dining hall and the inter-house sports, before people get weary. People have grown up, they now have new lives, and new experiences – reminiscing can be sweet, but there needs to be a finite point for it.

Also, there are some people who are still lugging the baggage of bitterness from the hurt inflicted on them 10 years ago. Who says they want to go back to being in the same space as you?

But bygones should be bygones sha… (another reason why we need to kill these Whatsapp groups)

Then, there’s the tiny issue of projects and decisionmaking. Anybody who has been on a Whatsapp group consisting of Nigerians will tell you how frustrating it is to make a decision. From little things like planning a bridal shower, to trying to buy a bus for your old school – these groups will make you want to bang your head against a wall.

Make it stop!

Make it stop!!

Make it stop!!!

Or make a decision. Do something. Anything, but going back and forth over trying to decide how much should be allocated to the project.
Someone told me that in their Whatsapp group for the 20th anniversary of their graduation, they’ve been trying to come up with an appropriate levy plan for everybody.

“What is wrong with an equal levy across board?” I asked, pretending to be naïve.

“They said some people are doing better than other people and so they should be able to support more.”
Of course, his response reminded me of our spirit of entitlement to another person’s disposable income.

So, why do these groups still exist? Well, some people find it entertaining. My cousin said she found all the stories and recaps very interesting until someone sent her a private message outside the group asking for letter of invitation.
She ran!

But, it’s not all doom and gloom with Whatsapp group and secondary school alumni. At least, I’m guessing so, because they still exist and they’re going strong.

To those of you who managed to make it past the first day of invite… more power to your texting fingers. We hope you build the new hostel for your school soon.

Photo Credit: Charity Adetiba-Howard

You probably wanna read a fancy bio? But first things first! Atoke published a book titled, +234 - An Awkward Guide to Being Nigerian. It's available on Amazon. ;)  Also available at Roving Heights bookstore.Okay, let's go on to the bio: With a Masters degree in Creative Writing from Swansea University, Atoke hopes to be known as more than just a retired foodie and a FitFam adherent. She can be reached for speechwriting, copywriting, letter writing, script writing, ghost writing  and book reviews by email – [email protected]. She tweets with the handle @atoke_ | Check out her Instagram page @atoke_ and visit her website atoke.com for more information.

71 Comments

  1. Some Random Dude

    July 6, 2016 at 2:47 pm

    This is exactly what’s happening with my own set on WhatsApp – now I have disabled automatic download of media as they send more images than all of Facebook in a single day. Also after 22 years, they are still as annoying as ever. But I love them all as they remind me of why they are my friends in the first instance.

    • OMG. whatsapp

      July 6, 2016 at 3:12 pm

      OMG, it looks like u studied my group. and we are not Nigerians! human beings are the same.

    • fleur

      July 7, 2016 at 3:39 am

      How were you able to do this disabling? I need to disable mine. I am tired of looking for my kids pictures to show friends and finding all kinds of absurd memes and people’s photos in my gallery.

  2. A proud alumni

    July 6, 2016 at 3:02 pm

    Sagamu 99 for life!

    • Bodunade

      July 6, 2016 at 7:01 pm

      FGCL ’05,
      I see 20 years, 24 years, 22 years, wow!!
      Uncles and aunties, respect large!! 😀

    • "changing moniker"

      July 6, 2016 at 10:55 pm

      The age gap is practically the same….see why we were destined to flirt on BN?

    • Bodunade

      July 7, 2016 at 8:51 am

      @changing moniker,

      Yez baby, it’s called kadara ??

  3. Nike

    July 6, 2016 at 3:10 pm

    I hate secondary school groups, it’s all a game of oneupmanship, everyone trying to show how well they’re doing compared to others. I didn’t really have many friends in secondary school and so didn’t see any need to continue the falsehood of “one happy family”. I’ve left groups and taken people off my BBM without any regrets.

    • Anon

      July 6, 2016 at 3:55 pm

      Touche. Some of us in my set never joined those groups and we were called strange, weird and anti-social. RME!

  4. Nameless

    July 6, 2016 at 3:16 pm

    Atoke, I can absolutely relate as I just left my set’s whatsapp group 2 days ago. Initially, it was exciting…reminiscing and all and even though I was not a very active participant, reading through their tens of texts was a good way to take a break from work. However, I discovered that unfortunately many of them are still shallow, very shallow that you wonder if you were actually in the same school at some point. For example, there was a time we were discussing feminism, I was shocked at how ignorant they were (mind you it was an all girls school), not only were they ignorant, a lot of them were (are always) opposed to discussing such issues. They would complain that the issue was being overfloggged, draining batteries etc….basically they were just really opposed to intellectual discourse. On the other hand however, when it comes to mundane issues such as fine boys, weddings, food, pictures etc…you need to see the level of engagement and zero opposition (including from those who complain when we discuss important issues)…Mind you these girls are 24- 26ish.
    I just left for my own sanity really, there was no value…even nuisance value was zero. I cannot come and intentionally be diminishing my IQ when people are looking for ways to save the world.

    • Mz Socially Awkward...

      July 6, 2016 at 5:35 pm

      To be honest, I treat whatsapp groups like I treat real human beings and with the primary understanding that one group alone can’t satisfy all my discussion needs.

      And for this reason, I’ve now determined what groups I want to discuss what subjects in. My most intimate groups are set up with a handful of friends (literally so as you can count members on 1 hand)… and I have two of those core groups (because these friendships were entered into at different levels of my journey). In those groups, we can delve into some hard issues – our spirituality, career discussions, world affairs, relationships (and sexual realities for the married ones who like to share such tinz), general musings, etc.

      In the circle just outside of the whatsapp group of core friends, I’m part of certain “churcheous” groups… but some of them are probably more light-hearted and open to honest discussions than others. I’ll take certain intellectual/socially-relevant/controversial topics into a couple of them but won’t do that with all of them. And even for the ones that I may raise those topics within, I might find only 50% of the group members are willing to participate. Toh. If it fizzles out, no wahala, after all some people didn’t join the group for “allathat”.

      For the very large circle, such as secondary school reunion groups … sometimes, someone throws in something thought provoking and I have to be fair to my own sec. school group – it won’t be ignored but you’ll get a shocking revelation of how differently people think when it comes to certain matters (like “what feminism really means” for instance). To keep the peace, we have to agree to disagree on many aspects of certain subjects (a big one is the concept of a woman’s role in the marriage and submission) and you sef go just die the matter because… you’ve not seen these babes in 20 years, how do you expect them to fully embrace everything from your point of view? We’ve all grown differently and so I try to say my piece without getting too worked up.

      It’s really about deciding what group is a more rewarding place for holding certain discussions.

  5. Peace

    July 6, 2016 at 3:52 pm

    An African indeed! Humans. Was informed of watsup group declined despite hearing the gist is juicy. Crossing the river I need to meet new people and ideas. Flog myself into unnecessary competition… nah! Contentment is a dish we hardly eat as humans. Go and buy trouble..

  6. Wendy

    July 6, 2016 at 3:53 pm

    My SS group, which I was added a few weeks ago, is full of people who want to send news feed and tell riddles and jokes. I went to a mixed school, most of the girls are there but hardly participate. I discovered it is the same set of 10 to 15 people that are very active, even though we are more than hundred in the group. I am tempted to remove my number, but I think to myself, what harm are they doing except draining my phone battery. Sometimes people need place to let loose.

  7. debs

    July 6, 2016 at 4:06 pm

    The best thing I did was mute notifications from my ss group. From time to time i delete the chats. When I am bored, I read the msgs. I am not thinking of leaving yhe group soon cos its entertaining. Some actually like to play bully with their opinions but this is 21years àfter so I ignore them and their opinions.

  8. Ephi

    July 6, 2016 at 4:20 pm

    “To those of you who managed to make it past the first day of invite… more power to your texting fingers. We hope you build the new hostel for your school soon.”

    Hahaha! They’d better build those hostels!!

    I am not on Whatsapp so joining any SS group is out of the question. I love my privacy too much for that. But I attended my SS reunion (organized via facebook) once in Lagos, it was okay but I’m not sure about attending subsequent ones. My mum and sis on the other hand are very into the meetups, whatsapp groups, fund raising etc etc, but they are full blown extroverts so that explains why. As for me, count me out.

  9. www.thelmathinks.com

    July 6, 2016 at 4:23 pm

    ” As soon as they receive notification that they’ve been added to a secondary school group, they leave”. I belong to this category. Secondary school groups, bridal shower groups, friendship groups etc, I’m both uninterested and lacking in the mental energy for any of it. If we all need to decide something, y’all go ahead and tell me the verdict, if i’m fine with it then I do the needful, otherwise I keep walking.

  10. Blessedheart

    July 6, 2016 at 4:26 pm

    Well, I love my secondary school Whatsapp group. It kind of started out as a fund raising thing which we were able to achieve. Now, it’s all about networking, sharing ideas, experiences, helping one another out in different areas, etc. It’s been really great. No one puts on unnecessary airs and the occasional disagreements are settled easily. The loads of messages thing apply but I’ve learnt to mute my Whatsapp groups and the thread is usually interesting so catching up isn’t a chore. This article just made me appreciate the group more

  11. Nameless In Lagos

    July 6, 2016 at 4:36 pm

    I feel the writer is writing based from her own experiences and maybe her own personality. I belong to one and honestly, one of the best groups I’ve joined. Maybe my classmates are more real than others because I’ve observed no one has attempted to come and pose for anyone. If they did, they would have been called up on it immediately – no chill ?. True though chats can be very distracting but that’s why you have “turn off notification” icons and really you don’t have to respond to every convo!!! Abi?!. In my sec school group we’ve helped each other like those looking for jobs, advise with schools for MBA or MSC programs, contacts for information, medical support links etc. We even patronize each other’s businesses e.g the engineers, Designers, teachers, Carpenters, Doctors, make up artists, lawyers, as a way of helping each other. By extension even our siblings are beginning to benefit from our network. It’s been fun connecting back but it also depends on what you want to take away from the group – it’s true there maybe some guys or babes bragging about XYZ or their latest acquistion – if you are “moved” by such its really your problem. So personally I beg to differ; it’s not as bad as most people tend to portray the groups to be. If you check it sometimes it’s people that had issues with others from school or even the school they went to sef that continue to have issues. Well written piece though. Well done.

  12. S

    July 6, 2016 at 4:56 pm

    Actually my secondary school set group is amazing. #AFCS01

  13. Mz Socially Awkward...

    July 6, 2016 at 5:05 pm

    Atoke, leave our Whatsapp sec. school reunion groups, jooo… 😀

    And biko, if you choose to join any Whatsapp group (especially one occupied by plenty Nigerians), the first and primary rule is to visit your settings & turn off your notification. This is how I’ve been delivered from the headache of trying to conserve battery life and watching scores of messages pop up on my screen every second. The flip-side being that when you finally decide to open the group to see what you’ve missed, you’ll have to scroll through 300+ messages… all posted within 1 morning.

    I love my secondary school reunion group but I must admit that I had plenty of misgivings about joining because we were catty little misses in secondary school (make we talk true, attending boarding school packed with adolescent girls can be a terrifying affair). So, I joined the group armed with pre-determined reasons not to stay and just “obsarved” silently for a couple of months, to see wetin dem dey do for there. And to be honest, I was pleasantly surprised – it wasn’t all bad! 😀

    Turns out the group moderators (quite like the FIN moderators), made certain rules which are published every time a new member gets added on and basically set the tone of things. It’s filled with bants, the inevitable spamming of jokes and GIFs, ladies sharing the good and the bad, regular morning devotional messages (from our resident Mummy-Pastor-in-the-making), photos of “what we look like today”…. celebrations with those who are celebrating and joint prayers for those who’re in some sort of bind… I love all of it. It’s a warm-hearted community and I won’t pretend that we no dey get some kain small-small quanta but they are very rare and quickly snuffed out.

    The one thing I will agree with you on is the issue of donations. Ahhhhh, money matter no dey ever get conclusion – how much (na discussion point), who suppose hold am (another discussion point), wetin we suppose do with the money (one of the reasons for our rare quantas), etc. etc. And like some members in the group, I realised that it’s easier to just do anything laid upon my heart to do, on my own. No need to dey talk for long, just give your own little contribution directly to the source you want to bless and keep it moving.

    We dey try, sha. Great Feddy babes! 🙂

  14. chique

    July 6, 2016 at 5:13 pm

    hahaha this is so FEDGOCOL PH class of 92 what ssap group.

  15. Ginger

    July 6, 2016 at 5:40 pm

    Your articles are as interesting as they are thought provoking, and definitely one of the least shallow. I can’t really relate though, because a large group chat is the last thing I or any British boarding school girl will ascribe to. (There are re-unions every 10 years and the school has a strong network system through the Old Girls’ Association- and I think that’s more than enough)

    • Mama

      July 6, 2016 at 6:54 pm

      Make we hear word. Madam British boarding school.

    • aj

      July 6, 2016 at 7:34 pm

      lmaooooooooooo abi oh! too much shakara.

    • Ginger thinks you should all calm down ?

      July 6, 2016 at 8:41 pm

      You guys get so upset easily. I actually did this to get the exact reaction ????????????. If I said I went to boarding school in Ghana I KNOW you guys wouldn’t have reacted like this????. I’m not the one insulting or complaining about whatsapp groups so why are you guys so pressed.
      Thanks BN, I just won my second bet off you guys *kisses*?

    • Ijay

      July 6, 2016 at 7:14 pm

      Are you for real?

    • Ginger thinks you should all calm down ?

      July 6, 2016 at 8:42 pm

      Kisses dear, your comment just won me a lovely present. Eid el Fitr ??

    • Abi

      July 6, 2016 at 7:26 pm

      Geez, thanks for logging on just to let us know you went to a British boarding school with a strong network.

    • Just me

      July 6, 2016 at 9:31 pm

      Wow! ‘Ascribe’ or ‘subscribe’ to? British boarding school girl….

    • Ginger

      July 6, 2016 at 11:04 pm

      oops mistake noted! Thank you!
      ? @ the shade though

    • kilipot

      July 7, 2016 at 12:16 am

      LOL I love u ginger.

  16. Lady T

    July 6, 2016 at 7:45 pm

    Any QCOG in the building? Queen’s College, passing on the torch since 1923… 🙂

    • molarah

      July 7, 2016 at 11:15 am

      Its 1927!

    • Nefertiti

      July 7, 2016 at 12:30 pm

      ……1927

  17. Very Anonymous

    July 6, 2016 at 8:14 pm

    Hubby is part of the ISL 20 years reunion group on WhatsApp…

    May I say, it’s a never ending gist of how shallow some of these people are after so many years. Majority of the talks have swayed away from the actual reunion planning to talk about childish stuffs that a 20 yrs old should be talking about (ex: girls i.e. who are not fine anymore, really?; Which club they are landing at for the weekend, seriously?)

    The so called ‘popular guys/girls in their group have overshadowed everyone else in making a constructive comments/ideas about the reunion.
    Hubby had no choice but to leave the group….after getting a notification of over 4k messages…within a 24 hour period.
    They’ve actually divided up the group by creating a sub group for the UK & US people and I believe those groups are thriving better.

    What amazes me is, if some set of people want to talk about themselves all the time and dominate the conversation, how about creating a group for yourself and you can brag to each other???….Oh, I know that won’t work since the main audience that you want to feed your nonsense to is on the main group….lol….

    Thanks Atoke, for this write-up….I’ve meaning to vent for a while about this….lol

    • You be UDSS wife

      July 7, 2016 at 2:27 am

      Which ISL that’s so UDSS

    • UrFada

      July 8, 2016 at 3:48 am

      You’re a pie and your “hubby” is a boil-in-the-bag rent a clown!
      Cheers!!! 🙂

    • reply to UrFada

      September 12, 2016 at 8:22 am

      @Ur Fada, you sounds like a twin.

      that whatsapp group of isl 96 has some people who feels very important. then some fake pastors who feel they can dominate and control the group and they will even boast about it and how they insult and the recipient may feel like committing suicide the next thing they will be preaching and be calling in Jesus name.
      to me they are just looking for popularity which they lost when they left sec school. as oyinbos in this Uk dont even send u if u are a black.

      They even know how to insult people and think it is a good thing they feel they can boast about. . after they will be inviting people to fake bible group. i pity their church members and any twins around them.

    • Anon

      September 4, 2016 at 2:01 am

      That ISL ’96 group is so damn freaking stupid!!! I wonder what anybody still there is doing!

    • Anon 2

      September 22, 2016 at 7:21 pm

      You forgot to add that in that group, it has become fashionable to be senile and have a thwarted brain memory

    • reply to UrFada

      September 26, 2016 at 7:39 pm

      One serious quarrel just started now. a fat black fool based in boston called someone daft for expressing a view that appears extremist islam.
      Some lizard looking twin also insulted a peacemaker, becos she (the lizard looking) has the right to react in whatever way she wants, But in the past when another person reacts to a comment or situation, this idiot is usually the first to jump in to insult the person.
      Someone left in annoyance because some people didn’t agree with her. they were calling each other barking dogs etc.
      That group is not a level playing ground. If a loud mouthed bitch says something offensive, its all good. If another person who is quiet or ‘unpopular’ says it, it is automatically wrong thing to say. They are truly shallow especially the UK people. The UK peeps beggeed and begged people to attend their meet up. No one but them attended. USA meet up was a blast with real people present there. Who wants to be in the company of fake pastors who boast about how they can insult.
      SHitty group!

  18. Quest

    July 6, 2016 at 8:59 pm

    U left out the factioning part. In mine, I realized they had factions. The ppl in ur faction r only going to respond to comments made by their likes. Had no strength for such. Smh

  19. xxxx

    July 6, 2016 at 9:11 pm

    I didn’t exist in SS. I never exist. I feel bad. Loool. So I may be a bit reluctant about some meet ups or group things . So one year reunion I decided for the fun of it I was going to fly to town look hot and while networking at d reunion say I just flew in last night. Plus there was a hot dude who worked in Shell that kept asking if I was going to be there plus he was d son of somebody. Yimuu. I later didn’t come. Me and my Oil and Gas dude were disappointed.

    I think just like everything it may have its use. Some SS mates may be single like you and responsible too.

    Also it’s easy to network there. No long story u already have a basis. Some even know ur house sef.

    Plus introvert can easily hang out with such ones since making new friends can be incredibly hard sometimes.

  20. Fabulicious

    July 6, 2016 at 9:29 pm

    Nobody is talking about the ones that look through the contacts and then decide to make their own new group from there based on where they fit in eg married classmates,single.groovers, working class people,Thats is how i found myself in a group and this delilah’s ancestor had the guts to say that they keep hearing that i have kids but no pictures anywhere(meaning ahe has been searching)that people said i adopted,is it true?Abeg bear in mind that adoption is not bad ooo but for someone who has had 3singleton kids and carried them for 9months and even suffered a miscarriage along the line,i feel like i am entitled to do what i freaking want with my kids information. I told her off ehhhh and removed myself biko.
    .Only to hear from some people in the group that so i am still an ice queen.Abeg i dont have time to mute ooo.If you add me in a group,i publicly leave group so it will show that i left unless its Dangote that adds me until thenm

    • Mz Socially Awkward....

      July 7, 2016 at 12:07 am

      Ahn ahnn…. People actually do that? Grab your number from the list and port you to subgroups according to how they’ve categorised you?

      Damn. How is the aproko worrying them, though??? I’m reading some of these comments & now fervently grateful to God for the relative calm among my group of “old gals”…. & I don’t know if it’s because of the age of women there (I was actually one of the youngest in my class – a good number are in their 40s) but it’s definitely more mature than I thought it’d be. Women wey don dey hire matriculation gown as their own kids head off to uni (I’m also one of the very few unmarried babes in the group) and getting stuck into their daily hustle – dem really just dey face their front.

      And I’ll openly admit that my single status was one primary reason why I wasn’t initially keen on joining them as I been no just get energy to deal with inquisitions or barbed questions…. but like I said before, I’ve been pleasantly surprised at how chilled-out it’s turned out to be. Easy going, no airs, no pressure, no photos of your latest Range Rover Sport…. Of course, with so many married women in the room, certain topics get regularly discussed or moaned about but all comments are welcome, nobody makes anyone feel like they can’t be part of the convo because say you no get huzy (& you married women can like to discuss your sex lives sha! Like… Damn! ?).

      The person who asked about your kids is just plainly stupid but thank God for Whatsapp reunion groups in a way. At least you now know which idiots to clearly avoid when you’re at risk of running into them in real life. ?

    • Bebi

      July 7, 2016 at 9:06 am

      Lol. I thought I was the only one that noticed married women like talking about their sex lives.??. They should spare us. Some of us are dealing with conji in our single lives

  21. Mama

    July 6, 2016 at 10:20 pm

    Chai! Looks like I’m the only one who has NEVER been part of a whatsapp or bbm group. I don’t even know how this groups work.

    • Mz Socially Awkward....

      July 7, 2016 at 12:08 am

      Oya come, make we start BN Whatsapp group… ?

    • Mama

      July 7, 2016 at 12:55 am

      Only if we can charge registration fee‥na money matter full my head right now…lol

    • Atoke

      Atoke

      July 7, 2016 at 1:26 am

      I call dibs on Treasurer A.k.a Akapo! 🙂

  22. Me!

    July 6, 2016 at 10:23 pm

    How about those members of such groups that can generate political arguments to start WW3? Or those that keep posting long religious proclamations and asking you to send to 30 people?

  23. o

    July 6, 2016 at 10:48 pm

    17yrs after I left secondary school, some ppl are still stuck in time and have refused to grow up. I don’t even bother opening the chat again. I only read through may once a week for 1 min.

  24. Nne

    July 7, 2016 at 12:28 am

    Omg! Somebody shoot me please. This article is spot on. I had to leave both the general alumni group and my set group and my alumni state group (seriously guys, three groups for one goal oh). People legit started testing their writing skills on the page.publishing long winded annoying romantic comedies.at first I muted the group. Then I’d come back and see I got 800 messages in 5minutes. Then I unmuted.then I got tired of crying “my battery oh” and just did the needful. I don’t need anything to annoy me further in this buhari economy please. My body dey pepper me enough as it is.?

    • lacey

      July 7, 2016 at 4:17 am

      Not on Whatsapp, as I am a dynamic personality and so do not really have anything in common with my SS friends anymore!still love them loads,but I am always on the move due to my professional work where I meet new people every time globally be it Chinese,Indian,other Black Africans and of cause Oyibo! I am more of. a Church networking person,even at work I nor dey join WA groups! If you tell me Jesus Culture is coming to LA or NY I might decide to fly there to dance Gospel Rock,Planet Shakers o!Hill song o!My groove is more in Church now having games night,picnic and we always have luncheons in my Oyibo Church!there is food most Sundays,Dunkin Donuts and Coffee for Sunday school and nobody questions you being single!Not like Nja Church,so so gossip! Now that I am moving again!I know I will discover another correct Church!It is well!

    • Olope

      July 8, 2016 at 5:19 pm

      You sound like you are suffering from self loathe. I hope that isn’t the case.

    • Olope

      July 8, 2016 at 5:22 pm

      It’s one thing to embrace other cultures, and actually healthy to embrace the positives in the culture you are in, it is another to look down your nose at the one you are from or other “WA” groups. News flash: you are still who you are.

  25. Rolayo

    July 7, 2016 at 1:46 am

    You forgot birthdays. On those groups, it’s someone’s birthday almost everyday of the year and the greetings won’t come in at the same time

  26. KOK

    July 7, 2016 at 2:47 am

    I do not mind my secondary school what’s app group. Maybe it is because I am part of the older generation i.e. OGQC ’89, lol. A lot of us have changed & matured due to different stuff life has thrown @ us. My group is the epitome of sisters’s strength. The group has made grow closer because we visit ourselves more often,travel for reunions and plan outings. Furthermore, It allows me to stay in touch with classmates I have not seen or spoken with in a long time.

    • Bebi

      July 7, 2016 at 9:10 am

      Very mature opinion. At the end of the day, you make of a group what you want to. It’s been beneficial for a lot of people. Some people have benefitted from contributions like when bereaved or a child is sick and they don’t have the money for treatment or even been pointed in the right direction

  27. You be UDSS wife

    July 7, 2016 at 2:49 am

    Like everything in life, I have the power to turn off the TV. Same principle I apply always

  28. Proud Nigerian

    July 7, 2016 at 7:19 am

    Im shocked at how intelligent and spot on the article and comments are. Writer is a bit biased though (crazy people everywhere, even in our families) , you learn to ignore. Mute group, check in when you can. No wahala!!!???
    I might be reading more BN. It’s a different world here. I’v zeroed Nigerian blogs to lifted articles (grammatical blunders and geographical specific information included) and irritating irrelevant comments.

  29. Aston

    July 7, 2016 at 9:48 am

    I disagree with you, I have two Whatsapp groups on my phone from church. They just pass information across and sometimes funny photos. Sort your personal issues first. Too big for them?

  30. Debmara

    July 7, 2016 at 9:59 am

    Me I think that SS groups are a thorn in the flesh. People join to show off and it’s depressing, I had to leave my own group for the sake of my sanity and honestly, I won’t attend a reunion with those people. We’re not friends simple.

  31. Omojo

    July 7, 2016 at 10:43 am

    Well, personally, I think nothing in this life is by force. If you hate your group this much, why don’t you ex quietly? Some of us find such groups very entertaining and a way to keep in touch.

    But to avoid conflict, every group like every other thing should be guided by rules or guidelines.

  32. esther

    July 7, 2016 at 10:46 am

    Am in my old girls set group and it’s entertaining. I don’t contribute much though but it’s very entertaining and relaxing to read the chats during my break time at work and in the evenings. Hoping the group will be functional for a very loooonnnngggg time. Thanks Joke for bringing us all together again after 17 years. Saggy 99 group surely rocks.

  33. The Mathematician

    July 7, 2016 at 2:36 pm

    I disagree. My SS group is the best group I have ever been on. We have all kinds there. We disagree to agree. We are more than 100 bt not everyone participates bt they do read in d background. 24hrs chatting due to geographical location. Been on for more than a year and 2 successful reunions done.we have those keeping the group alive though and we all respect each others privacy. What other group of people to hang with than those who knew you when u were nothing.
    FGCI93 Rocks

  34. Tosin

    July 7, 2016 at 6:04 pm

    Gimme some love if you’re not on WhatsApp
    😀
    #NoIdeaWhatYAllTalkingAbout

  35. Iyun

    July 8, 2016 at 11:45 am

    I’m not in any group tho.. I think its a good way to keep in touch with your old friends/schoolmates..

  36. teetee

    July 8, 2016 at 2:05 pm

    if only you can exit whats app without people noticing………..

  37. Olope

    July 8, 2016 at 5:26 pm

    Atoke, your described groups are a microcosm of the world. What exactly is the issue”.”

  38. Anon

    September 4, 2016 at 1:56 am

    That group is so damn freaking stupid!!!! I wonder what anybody that is still there is doing!

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