If you missed the last posts before this, then you should go here and here and read them first before reading this. This is the concluding part of the series, so let’s jump right in. Remember, these lessons are not just for teenagers, you will find them necessary especially if you hope to become a parent one day.
Relationship Advice 101
For Guys: Your relationships need more than a six-pack and a deep voice to work
It is fascinating to have such a deep voice, grow taller and even have visibly strong muscles. Maybe some girls in your class are already tripping for you, and you feel you have all it takes to make your relationships work.
Sorry for being the one with the bad news. But a relationship needs more than muscles, a cute smile, a deep voice and saying ‘sweet nothings’ to work. Of course those are sexy and may get you the hottest date, but they are not enough.
A relationship, especially a marriage, comes with responsibilities. And you must work hard at fulfilling them to make it work.
Relationship Advice 102
For Ladies: Your relationships need more than looking sexy and cat-walking to work.
I am a guy and I know that seeing a beautiful girl with all the right curves in the right places is attractive. Unfortunately, a relationship needs more than physical attraction to work.
So ladies, you have responsibilities in your relationships too. And they will not be taken care of simply because you look sexy, or because your nails look cute.
Nothing is ever entirely free in life
The capital of Liberia is Freetown. Judging by its name, you would expect that things would be free or at least very cheap there.
Unfortunately it is not so.
So don’t be deceived by people who tell you they want to do you favors simply because you look ‘hot’. Some of these people are real, but many have ulterior motives.
If being hot or being ‘strong’ is paying your bills, and you are not a model, be careful. You may be a few steps away from prostitution, internet porn, or even drugs.
Run for your dear life. There is no free lunch anywhere, even in Freetown.
Taking loans are almost never worth it.
It is very tempting to be able to buy whatever you want especially when you cannot afford it normally.
Guess what? You shouldn’t take that short-term loan. Why should you start your life in debts? Most people don’t even understand how loans and credit cards work. And before they do, they would have gone neck-deep in debt.
Moreover it is not wise to buy the things you don’t need with the money you don’t have in order to impress the people that don’t like you.
So don’t be swayed by the concept of loans. If you must take them, always pay attention to all the agreements in the fine prints, especially the interest rate.
In my opinion though, “If you think well, what you have is always enough.”
You are not immortal
I watched the movie Matrix many years ago and I know the effect it had on me. I almost forgot that those things are mere stunts, and that in real life, heroes could actually die.
You see, there is a big difference between self defense and trying to be a hero. You can’t beat up ten guys who want to mug you except you are Jet Li. The end goal of self defense is not to beat up the people fighting you, but to get away to safety. Yes, get away.
It doesn’t make you a coward, it makes you wise!
An Igbo adage says that “it is through the back of the house of the coward that the corpse of the hero is taken to the burial ground”.
In conclusion, the best way to escape a fight is to prevent it from the onset, and your wallet is not worth dying for. But above all, he who fights and runs away lives to fight another day.
You are judged by the way you look.
People with good certificates and who actually look cool have a hard time getting jobs in today’s Nigeria. Do you honestly think you can get one easily by drawing a huge tattoo on your neck, piercing your tongue, sagging and walking with a limp, wearing red wigs, or wearing an earring on your nose?
I don’t intend to judge, but there is no second chance for a first impression.
Youthful exuberance is real, I know. But you must realize that people will continue to address you the way you are dressed till…forever.
Your first take-home pay may not take you home
Sooner than later, you will get your first job and an accompanying take home pay. Surprisingly, you will find out that the supposed ‘take-home pay’ may not take you to your next pay check.
So how do you make your take home pay take you home without taking loans (you shouldn’t take loans, remember?)
Simple! Be resourceful. Cut your coat according to your cloak, and not according to your size.
It means you need to learn how to do certain things for yourself.
These things include:
- How to change your fuse.
- How to jump start your car.
- How to wash, starch, and iron a cloth.
- How to sew a button etc…
The chief thing you need to learn however is to cook basic meals. Why? Cooking helps you save money, and also helps you avoid eating junk.
While living at home, I learnt to cook. As a student therefore, I was able to save some of the money I was supposed to use to eat. That way, I could afford to buy my first smartphone and other stuff.
Get the picture? Great!
In conclusion, note that so many things that happen in this period can affect you for the rest of your life, either positively or negatively. However also remember that you can only be a teenager once in your life.
So, enjoy the privilege while it lasts. Of course your parents may bore you, and school may suck, but one day very soon, you will understand that being a teenager and in school was a wonderful time.
Your Turn: What can you remember about being a teenager? Is there any lesson here that would have been very useful if you knew it earlier? And if you are still a teenager, what do you think of these lessons? Are there life lessons you think I forgot to add? Please add yours in the comment section below.
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