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Tomilola Adenuga: 7 Things I Wish I Could Change About the Nigerian Bride on Her Wedding Day

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dreamstime_m_61946323Trust me, I am sure by the time you finish reading this, you would have turned up your nose at me, dislike me a little and be like kilonshe babe yi?

Anyway, I guess I have to voice it out- perhaps a couple of people share my thoughts and would defend my school of thought, come what may. Please defend me well in the comments section.

Even a two year old knows that the Nigerian Wedding Industry is serious business. A lot has evolved over the past ten years from the Décor, to Makeup, to Photography and so many details, which are all part of the paraphernalia.

I mentioned evolved above, but I am wondering why some things are still were they are. This is not to malign people’s choices, but the essence of this long rant is just to remind would-be brides that creativity is unending. Please just task your wedding planner more, your Maid of Honour, Bestie or Mum and break out of the norm.

Who made those rules anyway?

Wedding Dress
It was those days that the original white wedding dress signified purity. They said it was for virgins – is that why you must wear a sparkling white dress? Who says those that wear other colours, e.g. Ivory are not saints too.

In case you never knew, Style Experts opine that Ivory dresses come off as more stylish, classy and look even more expensive than their sparkling white counterparts. Think about it; how would your dress look depending on both shades?

However, this does not rule out the fact that there are some ah-mazing dresses that are tailored in sparkling white. At the end of the day, the designer must have done such a fantastic job that makes you celebrate your wedding dress in all its glory.

Manicure
French Tips, White tips are kind of saturated. As a Bride, there are many other manicure designs you can explore. I remember BellaNaija did an explicit post about different kinds of manicure. You can have stones, pearls and be inventive with your wedding manicure.
I once saw a Bride whose friends cajoled and forced to wear French tips false nails because “It is compulsory” for Brides. Even though the manicure was not bad, her natural nails would have looked so beautiful with just applying nail polish all over. Remember the part when the groom slides the ring onto your finger. Make it very gbaski.

Photography
I won’t say much about this. I know many Brides love that wedding preparation where they arrange your stuff on the bed. Purse, Perfume, Ring, Dress, Hand fan, Jewellery, sometimes Pant and Bra sef.
I don’t get it. I have seen some photographers who have blown my mind away with the way they are creative with the Bridal accessories- some leave the bed and look for other props around the dressing area. Please let’s leave the bed for the very important stuff coming afterwards as in some hours after the Reception.

Reception Dress
Dear Bride, please if your reception dress is not off the hook and bada**, kindly leave it and rock an Asoebi Bella. I know this may come across as being cocky but trust me; I would rather have it this way. It is not compulsory to wear a reception dress. In a bid to have one, some people do very tacky things, and then ruin the essence of their original wedding dress, which cost a lot of money.

I went for a wedding and I had spent almost 30 minutes admiring the bride’s very beautiful and glamorous dress; I was shocked after she had changed into her reception dress. I was unhappy because her wedding dress was too beautiful to switch to something, which just didn’t cut it. One of the friends whispered that she was running low on her budget and then just quickly ordered a sequinned dress to be made. I know it is trendy to wear a reception dress, and it helps you get more comfortable, but if your wedding dress ticks off the important points and it is so fine, kindly maintain it. Use the money’s worth. You might never rock it again.

Pink Lips
All the brides asking for Pink lipstick, hope you know there are many other colours you can try. I get it that church or nikkai makeup is usually subtle but these days, makeup artists know their job so well. You could have dark lipstick and yet look so calm and collected ready for your Marriage Joining.
Dear Bride, please be also firm about what you WANT for your makeup look. There are many oversabi friends who seem like they are watching your back. Leave the plan to the “trusted few” who are more than sisters. How can “Pamela” who you have not spoken to in over two years be making decisions on your behalf?

Wedding Footwear
I am sure by now, most Brides know that wearing Silver or White footwear is outdated, except that is the theme for your overall look. It is cool to experiment with colours – especially the wedding colours. This gives you the opportunity to re-rock your footwear with ease. While you are at it, please do not forget to make plans for something more comfortable in order to rest your pretty feet.

Breakfast on Wedding Day
Dear friends of the bride. I know you mean well but please do not overreact. People try to goad the bride but it is important you allow her make her choice.

I was once a bridesmaid for my elder cousin. She insisted on just taking fresh mints with water- to keep her breath fresh. She wanted to fast on her wedding day for two reasons- personal to her and she is the type that could purge if nervous. You don’t want a bride taking an excuse to use the toilet when saying her vows do you? There are times you get so busy with work that you even forget to eat, did you faint?

I have also been to a wedding where the Bride was coerced to eating Breakfast before her wedding. She refused vehemently but her friends and Aunts insisted. The morale of the story is that as she was walking down the aisle at the Bridal March, her bowels decided to dance also and she tried all her best to stifle the Bowel movement. Even with the AC blasting away in church, she broke out in sweats and her makeup started running. Fortunately, on sighting the groom, her stomach behaved but that experience she will remember for a long time. Not having breakfast or lunch on your wedding day won’t hurt you except it’s needed for Health reasons.

We all have our different likes; every wedding can’t be like the former. There are no laid down rules- except the religious ones/cultural ones of course.

Stay true to yourself and be happy that almost every single detail went exactly how you pictured it to be.

Photo Credit: Pablo Hidalgo | Dreamstime.com

Tomilola is a hopeless romantic, lover of Fashion, Style and Beauty. She portrays this through her blog- www.tomiscolourpavilion.com You can also reach her via:- Facebook:- tomiscolourpavilion Instagram:- tomiscolourpavilion Twitter:- tomiscolour

19 Comments

  1. Otinkpu

    November 16, 2016 at 6:20 pm

    Nigerians and our fixation with weddings…sigh*. Perhaps we should focus on the quality of our relationships/ marriages more.

  2. I know right?!

    November 16, 2016 at 6:45 pm

    ‘How can “Pamela” who you have not spoken to in over two years be making decisions on your behalf?’…. this part cracked me up?
    Really an interesting read.

  3. Humility

    November 16, 2016 at 7:03 pm

    The French tips beats me always. Like who made these damn rules anyway? Even at that rules are meant to be broken . But deezwon you said they should try black (dark) lippy my hand nuh dey oh. ….before we start having masquerade brides or atilogu maids. Pink is subtle enough.?

    • "changing moniker"

      November 16, 2016 at 8:02 pm

      Hahaha

  4. Baby gurl

    November 16, 2016 at 7:11 pm

    Oh my God Tomilola I hate you for this aaargh u have literally given away my dream day just like that. I have planned to wear a dust pink or rose gold dress, purple stilleto nails and purple shoes(purple being sentimental to my partner and I). U av shared my ideas to the world now. Negodu. Mscheew. I love ur writing style anyways talking like my bestfriend in my head. U r proly Taurus lemmie guess lol. Pls send in more entries ur article is a delight to read!

    • Rachy

      November 16, 2016 at 10:39 pm

      @Baby gurl… Honestly! She has said exactly what I planned for my wedding! I already told him my wedding dress won’t be plain white and so many things she said! And that French nail hasn’t bn my thing so it wasn’t going to be for me on my day!! While I was reading I was like OMG!! How did she know ? My wedding has to be unique, simple, classy and fun. Btw am a Taurus ?? Nice write up though

  5. Really

    November 16, 2016 at 7:30 pm

    I thought you were even going to say ladies should stop stressing themselves out so much and freaking out over a few hours ceremony and just focus on the future. What is all this??

  6. Wana

    November 16, 2016 at 8:03 pm

    I am single and I am really not looking for a relationship right now but to further my career. However, when it comes to the wedding day, I have already made up on my mind on certain and no one can change it.
    1. No reception dress. My wedding dress would be worn all through the day (church + reception). No time for stressing myself for a reception dress. Damn it.
    2. I am not wearing heels. I am going to get myself a nice ballerina peep-toe flats. Every time, I tell my friends I won’t be wearing heels, they try to say it’s not possible. Watch me do the impossible. lol.
    3. Team natural nails and a nice colour polish. I don’t have time for cake particles to be left behind on my nails. Plus, I have never really enjoyed having artificial nails.
    4. My regular makeup is concealer+powder+eyeliner with a nice lipstick. My wedding makeup has to be ‘a professional regular makeup’ with a nude lipstick. I love the natural bridal makeups. No foundation for me 🙂
    5. I am quite fair in complexion, a bronzy kind of fair. I have always loved the look of orange, nude, beige kind of colour on my skin. My wedding dress is definitely not going to be orange but a nude+beige+ivory kind of colour.

    Okbye!

  7. MadamDMadam

    November 16, 2016 at 10:34 pm

    Nice writeup, but d most annoyin of dem all! Some really primitive babes stil wear gloves, Oh MY!
    I need advice I av a cousin who is gettin married soon, I knw she will wear, hw can I make her stop d embarassmt, we are far nd avnt spoken for over a year nd am not attendin d weddin, bet I knw dat gal can fall hand since 1900, with all d pharmacy she read!

    • Tomilola Adenuga

      November 17, 2016 at 10:58 am

      Please just show her fabulous photos of Brides- Instagram, Facebook etc . Hopefully if she sees all that, she will get the idea that she can look fabulous without gloves.

    • Vy

      November 18, 2016 at 12:36 am

      Loool….. Gwosh! Plan with someone attending to steal them and hide far away from her….. I have hated those gloves since they were invented….

  8. Taiwo Fagbo

    November 16, 2016 at 10:59 pm

    TOMI lovely lovely article. Pls we need you to write more . You should write about bridezilla brides .

    • Tomilola Adenuga

      November 17, 2016 at 11:05 am

      Thanks a lot Taiwo. More will definitely come from me by God’s grace.

  9. Abominable snow girl

    November 17, 2016 at 7:56 am

    Heeheelarious. Thanks dear, so funny. How can you eat before your wedding…. You DONT!
    You don’t eat before interviews or journeys, why will you now come and eat BREAKFAST…… before walking down the aisle…. ??

  10. Chammy

    November 17, 2016 at 9:06 am

    I concur! We really need to break off the norm… I was really hoping someone would hit this points, I told my friends my wedding dress would be lilac with champagne gold stud and they went AWOL… Swidy,you did a good job… We really need wedding-cation (wedding education)

    • Tomilola Adenuga

      November 17, 2016 at 11:03 am

      Thanks a lot. I hope it works for you. Once you have your husband -to- be and family in agreement.

  11. gumsy

    November 17, 2016 at 9:47 am

    What is your business with what anyone decides to do for their wedding? Better mind your business.

  12. Saudi Prince

    November 17, 2016 at 7:01 pm

    Nice piece?. Can’t wait for the next

  13. Anon

    November 19, 2016 at 11:22 am

    You don’t break out in ‘sweats’. It’s not like pimples!

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