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Akudo Abengowe-Adebayo: The Joy of Marrying Someone You Love



Akudo AbenogweI was at a wedding last Saturday. I love weddings, I think it’s romantic in a way. I was exceptionally happy because this wedding was a testimony and a proof that God never abandons his own. At some point, none of us – including the bride – was sure about the wedding anymore. We had almost given up because everything that could possibly go wrong went wrong.

Imagine a scenario where the wedding has been planned, the dates fixed, cards printed, every necessary item bought and then the wedding didn’t hold. That was exactly what happened, and it was traumatising to say the least. I won’t go into much details because I respect the privacy of the people involved. One thing I learnt from the whole thing though is that ‘what will be will be’ – if only the people involved are determined to make it work.

I believe that there is a woman for every man and vice versa. How and when one will meet his soulmate is entirely in the hands of our creator. My friend had gone through hell in the hands of men, and every time she gets hurt, I’d remind her that she was yet to find her soulmate. The search continued until one day she met ‘him’ her soulmate.

Everything clicked from the get-go. You could tell they were headed for the altar, and when he proposed, I smiled and said, ‘but I told you so’. When the wedding plans were hijacked and the couple were faced with all sorts of oppositions, she came crying to me. I reminded her that nothing good comes easy.

My friends, na so I turn to marriage counsellor oo. She would call me at odd hours, heartbroken and almost giving up. We would pray together and I would drop some words of advice. Honestly, every wedding period comes with its own peculiar challenges and that is why the couple need to be steadfast, prayerful and honest with each other at all times. That way, they can form a united front and face the challenges squarely.

Eventually, tired of the whole thing, the guy suggested a registry wedding, which seemed like a smart thing to do as that would calm all frayed nerves and soften all opposition. The notice she gave me was so short, literally less than 15 hours, but I was determined to make it – especially since I was going to be the witness at the occasion.
I moved every other thing I had to do that day and went to the registry to support my girl and I am happy everything turned out well. Seeing how gorgeous my friend looked, and how she and her husband smiled into each other’s eyes was enough consolation for the stress they have both passed through.

It’s such joy to marry someone you love. I believe that love is a key ingredient in marriage, and one needs lots of love to go through the institution of marriage. As I made a toast to the couple at the lunch table, I gave them a few words of wisdom and shared some of my experiences with them. The other guests, especially the married ones, also shared their own experiences at the table.
One thing I could tell was that this couple were determined to be happy against all odds and I couldn’t help but wish them all the best.

That being said, last Wednesday was my wedding anniversary. I must say I was spoilt beyond my expectations *wink*. We also took out time for a little tete a tete. Having such conversations is healthy for a relationship because it helps both parties to be on the same page and also recognise and appreciate the sacrifices each one is making to make the relationship work.
Marriage is not just a union, it’s also about selflessness and sacrifices and a mix of the good and bad. We can only pray for more good times and less bad times.

Akudo Abengowe-Adebayo is a multiple award winner, with over 8 years in the media industry. She also hosts (Love Moments With Akudo) and is CEO of SATT Media, a content and media marketing company. She blogs at Akudosworld. She is married with two adorable kids and loves Jesus with all her being. She is a TV addict, loves dancing and traveling, and a lil gossip now and then. Follow her on [email protected] or [email protected]


  1. Anne

    February 10, 2017 at 6:06 pm

    Nice and encouraging. The man must love the woman o. If you force yourself on a man who does not love you. You are trapped. The story of Jacob in the Bible amazes me. When he learnt Esau was coming, he put Rachel and her children behind others so she can be more protected. He loved Joseph and Benjamin more than the other children. The love he had for Rachel was so strong. Leah struggled to be loved. Princess Diana was loved by so many people but her husband’s heart was elsewhere. It is hard to keep up if a man does not love you. You’ll do everything and weary yourself out. The man is not being wicked. His heart is not just with you. Instead of struggling. Just pray for your own.

    • Me

      February 11, 2017 at 12:19 am

      Your comment is so true and so beautiful

  2. oma

    February 10, 2017 at 9:14 pm

    LOVE will always find its way.

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