Temi Olajide: Keeping Up With Life as a Busy Mum

Everyone is so busy in 2019! We are all so busy, it has taken a huge toll on us – our bodies, mental health and state of mind. The earlier we realise we are in danger if we continue this way, the sooner we are able to correct it.

As mums, we are natural born multitaskers. We are able to take care of everyone and everything that needs our attention, but for some reason we forget to take care of the most important person – ourselves. The truth is no matter how busy life gets, you need to find time for you. So you can live well for your family to enjoy you.

Self care is basically taking care of yourself. It is an important part of your life that you need to be deliberate about. It shouldn’t be a routine activity you enjoy once in a while, but a lifestyle.

I like to describe self care as taking care of a vehicle ahead of a road trip. As a mum, you are the vehicle taking your family with you. If you don’t refuel or service your car regularly, it can easily breakdown or stop along the way. Ultimately, you will either arrive at your destination late, or you may be unable to get to your destination altogether. This is what happens, if you don’t take good care of yourself as a mum. Before you can be valuable to others , you have to constantly add value to yourself.

Now more than ever before, mums are overwhelmed, sad and depressed; some are even resentful because they keep giving to everyone other than themselves. You’re not being selfish to care for yourself, neither should self care be seen as a luxury. Rather it is a necessity to stay long and well.

Recently, I was having a conversation with a mum, who noted that between managing her job and family, her life had changed so much. She never had time to just chill by herself, or even pamper herself. In fact, it was so bad she hadn’t hung out with her friends in the past seven years!

The truth is, like this mum, many mums fail to prioritise themselves. You’re working so hard to be a good wife, mum, employee and you always put yourself at the back seat. Everyone else is okay, except you. When your mind and body can no longer take the neglect, you may suffer a breakdown.

The question is: how do you find time for yourself with everything else you have to do every day. The answer is: you have no choice other than to be intentional about your “me time.”

As humans, we will always create time for what matters to us. See yourself as important, and you’ll treat yourself as important. It really is that simple.

Ask yourself, Am I enjoying myself the way I would love to? Do I still do the things I once enjoyed before becoming a wife and mother? We all know that life changes when you become a mum, but being a mum should be an addition, a blessing that brings joy and fulfilment to your life, not something you have to endure because you have no choice.

And mums, self care is neither about having a lot of money nor hiding behind a lot of makeup. It may be the simple things, depending on what you enjoy: getting a good nap during the weekend, going to the movies, or even getting a massage/facial every month.

There are five pillars of self care:

Renew through rest
The lack of adequate sleep and rest can lead to crankiness and unnecessary shouting and screaming, which may ultimately lead to a decline in health and mental state. Mums need to delegate chores to others in the home and take out time to rest properly.

Refuel through nutrition
Many people do not realise this, but eating a balanced diet, high in vitamins and other essential nutrients, is also a form of self care. In addition, drinking enough water and reducing the consumption of junk food is self care for your body.

Revive through exercise
Engage in exercise or any other activity you enjoy doing. If you have kids, you can get them interested and involved in fun activities (including dancing, swimming, walking, cooking, etc.) you enjoy at the weekends.

Recharge through the things you love
This can be reading a book, watching a movie, personal development class, dance, shopping, or just by being alone with yourself for sometime, even if it’s just for 30 minutes.

Restore through quick beauty routine
This may include going to get your hair done or getting a beauty makeover. It can also include getting a pampering massage/facial or pedicure/manicure treatment to look good for you and your loved ones.

There are a lot of amazing benefits of self care, including:

• Being more energised.
• Being less reliant on medication(s).
• Becoming more patient and relaxed as a person.
• Becoming a more confident and happier person.
• Being less stressed, which means you’re not easily prone to heart attacks and health breakdown.

As we say at Mummyclinicc, with the right strategies in place, mummy life should be enjoyed, not endured. The first step to that is loving yourself enough to take care of yourself.

Mums, how do you practice self care? Feel free to share with us in the comment section.

You may just be inspiring some of us.

I’ve written a book titled “WiFi Kids & Analogue Parents.” It addresses the changes in the dynamics of parenting in this age, and how to handle those changes. It’s down-to-earth and fun, and it provides the much needed guide for raising children in the digital age. It is all-encompassing, and highlights the pros and cons of the digital age, sex education for kids, understanding and communicating with children in the digital age, constructing boundaries, creating effective sleep patterns, among other salient issues bordering on parenting in the digital age. You can get it on Amazon.