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Oluwadamilola Ojikutu: Why You Should Keep a Kudos File
While you’re sulking at all the goals you didn’t hit this year, remember that this same you excelled at a lot of things.
I discovered keeping a kudos file while scrolling through LinkedIn for something that is less important. But I simply told myself that I was researching for work to silence my guilt. I’m one of those that avoid LinkedIn and I cannot explain why because I personally do not know. On this day, I was supposed to post on a brand page and leave the app instantly, but a cute photo of an ex-coursemate caught my eyes, and I found myself scrolling through the app for about 15 minutes until I stumbled on this line: “Do you keep a kudos file?”
A few days ago, a face-to-face conversation I had with someone sent all the self-confidence I thought I had built down the drain. They got me asking myself, “What did you say you were grateful for again?”
A lot of our adult life, albeit trying to avoid the reality of it, is filled with discomfort. People tell you to not allow yourself to sit too long in your comfort zone, that you should take risks and stretch yourself outside. Yet, when you stretch yourself out to other places, it always seems like stretching out your hand in a moving vehicle and before you know it, you’ve lost an arm. Again, when you make this kind of comparison to explain why you don’t get out of your comfort zone, they tell you, but you will never know if you don’t try.
People turn around after asking you to preserve your heart to make sure you understand that being in your unadulterated condition makes you full. Whereas, what you really want for your body and soul is ease. Heck, that’s all I’ve prayed for all year. I have come to realise that praying for ease doesn’t mean we want our big dreams to be rubbed off, but it is to be some sort of assurance and confidence that our ocean of big dreams will rise someday.
I will stop struggling so hard and rather go to bed if there’s a life brochure that told me at what point in my life I will receive gold, frankincense, and myrrh.
But it’s never that simple.
What placates me on days I’m extremely unsure of why I get my hands dirty is to scroll through the encouraging comments under my works that make me believe in what I am building. This is why when I saw that question on LinkedIn, it seemed to hit home.
I did not use to keep a kudos file, but my mind kept track of from who and at what time I received a comment. WhatsApp does a great thing in making sure that I find them on time also. In the last 11 months, it has really helped a lot to keep me in check when my hormones started raging.
Before I started this article, I created a folder labelled just because you’re a rockstar on my laptop that contains screenshots of all the random and positive words that have elevated my spirit at different times. Whilst I cannot exactly say what this file means for me in months to come, one thing is sure: for my bad days, I have an incredible stock of great words to lift my soul and help me find myself.
I have decided that curating my kudos file may be best for me. Some people cannot help but be a little extra with everything they do. I’m one of them. One of the things that I’ll love to add to my kudos file is a document of affirmations. I have figured that affirmations have become a big deal to me. Most especially on days when I’m unsettled. I’ll be adding a note about myself. This will include everything that I think of myself, raw and unfiltered. Every time that I open that file, I want to be reminded of who I really am at my core. I never want to lose sight of the love that I have for myself and how much that has gotten me where I am. My kudos file will also contain random letters to myself.
For you, it may just be a compilation of sweet words that keeps you going. Ordinary “thank you,” said in its simplest form, does magic to our souls. It could be a simple remark that you recall word for word and by heart. It could even contain a list of tracks that keep you believing. Look at it as creating a home for yourself. I spend more than half of my life staring at a screen, and that’s why I’m keeping mine digital. How about having your kudos compilation in your favourite journal or wall? Even that spot in your bathroom is an extremely great option.
You should join me. Or maybe you shouldn’t. But if what you’re looking to do going forward is try a new path, come with me on this one. Consider this a lone ranger looking to add to its pack. I believe your kudos folder will help you see your growth and progress. It reintroduces you to yourself on days when words may fail.
While you’re sulking at all the goals you didn’t hit this year, remember that this same you excelled at a lot of things. The way to remind yourself how far you’ve come is with your kudos file.
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