Obiageli Ojogbo: Grooms, What Colour of Bride Do You Think You’re Getting?

dreamstime_l_24000844Grooms, have you ever wondered what your bride is thinking as she walks towards you on that day that would mark the beginning of the rest of your life? Really think about it: are you sure that if you could read your bride’s mind, you would still go ahead with the wedding?

So tell me what kind of bride do you think you are getting, “ladies what kind of bride were you – honestly”

Bride one:
“Thank God I am marrying the love of my life. I have waited for so long, now my special day is here. I thank my lucky stars for the day … decided I was the girl who caught his eye, making a move on me to become the lady who captured his heart. I vow that my home would be wonderful. I would be the best wife and partner. Oh I feel so giddy. He loves me, I know he does. I see the way he look at me, if it is not love I see in his eyes, colour me blind”

Bride two:
“I know I can make this work. Many people have less yet they make a go of it; I will do the same. What really is love when there is no money? He has money and he has prospects. I will be comfortable. Yes, I would be, and love would come after. I can’t really do worse. 10 years down the line when I am enjoying all my wealth I won’t remember this feeling. I will be somebody of worth in the society. Yes this is worth marrying for, colour me vain”

Bride three:
“Finally my day is here. I was beginning to wonder if I would end up alone. After all these years I get a ring on this finger, I get to know what it feels like to be a wife. All my friends are married with kids, now I get to join them. Old age almost stole my joy but I came out victorious. Whether I love him or not is not even the issue, as far as he has proposed. Colour me taken”

Bride four:
“Am I doing the right thing? I know I have known him for years, we claim to be best friend but am I marrying him because I love him or because he is the safe choice? Yes he is the safe choice. Even though he is not my Mr. Right, we can have a good marriage. What if I meet someone and fall in love? Oh colour me confused.”

Bride five:
“I am settling for less this I know. This is not the kind of guy I would even consider in a million years. Where were all the guys with swagger, tall, handsome, money, you know na? I can’t even hold my head high. I am sure everyone knows I am settling for less, even the groom. Hmmm colour me resigned.”

Bride six:
“I hate him. Why am I even marrying this man? I know this is wrong. We don’t even like each other. What is the point of this sham? I would marry him smiling to the whole world while secretly dying inside. I am going to turn into a bitter lady, damn Colour me red.”

Bride seven:
“I know you don’t love me, if you had your way you would not even be standing there waiting for me. You love … well guess what, you have to make do with me because I am not going anywhere. You will love me even if you have to force it. I won’t mind that it is fake, I won’t mind that you don’t love me. As long as your home and family is with me I will ignore it all and make my home work. If I can endure your fake loving then get ready to fake love away, colour me ready”

Bride eight:
“It is about time we got married. We have been dating for almost a decade. We already behave like married couples, I guess in a way we were. I am at the point where the sparks are dim and there is really nothing to look forward to. We have done it all. I was married before I became a bride. Nothing would really change, so colour me frozen”

Photo Credit: Dreamstime

48 Comments on Obiageli Ojogbo: Grooms, What Colour of Bride Do You Think You’re Getting?
  • XOXO February 23, 2016 at 5:09 pm

    Oh Colour me Blind. I work in Vi, living in Ajah after men on the island dealt with me . I decided to look beyond the location, right now I’m happy Dating someone not even in Lagos state, I haven’t been this happy in a long time.

  • Oyefunke February 23, 2016 at 5:16 pm

    Bride one after waiting for a long while. Was like a dream. Yeah God still answers prayers

    • mmik February 23, 2016 at 6:53 pm

      Same here, after waiting n bring patient and having to deal with all sorts of comments from pple, God brought him my way #myworld’sbest

  • Ybbil February 23, 2016 at 5:27 pm

    Toolz should check out Bride 8

    • Blueberry February 23, 2016 at 6:12 pm

      How about Toke? She is all shades of brides. Bride 1 through bride 3 to bride 7 and 8. Lol.

      • Pretty girl February 23, 2016 at 11:02 pm

        Blueberry u are a very wicked somebody

      • Ybbil February 24, 2016 at 8:01 am

        All shades of brides, you are so mean lol

  • Olu February 23, 2016 at 5:28 pm

    I didn’t think.

    I just enjoyed the moment.

  • Bridezilla February 23, 2016 at 5:35 pm

    Bride Nine : this isn’t my dream wedding and everything was done in a rush. I couldn’t be bothered as long as I’m not delivering this baby out of wedlock. I hope noone can see my baby bump hidden under this ball gown… he is not my dream guy but its too late now, he is nice and he loves me so i guess that’s enough, Maybe i can get him to do what i want… Color me Knocked up!

    • fabulicious February 23, 2016 at 5:55 pm

      I was actually searching for the bride 9 part,the one who joins forces with her family and his to drag him to the aisle course of belle.Colour them belle must get papa.

    • Blueberry February 23, 2016 at 6:07 pm

      Lmfao…hilarious ?????…colour me knocked up..

      • Lol February 23, 2016 at 7:05 pm

        Quick question. … how do you know you’re making d right choice orr that you’ve made a right choice. …? how do you knw that there isnt someone better out there that you are still to meet? Doess anyone ever feel like yes i love ds guy but could i be missing out on more….like someone who totally gets me. ?someone who can even be better. You only date pple who you have met right? What if theres still someone you are still to meet?
        Like that saying that says u dont knw what you’re missing until u stmble on it. … O dear i love my bf i know he loves me but……… colour me confused

      • Corrolla February 23, 2016 at 10:11 pm

        @LOL to anwer your question, I think you know you’ve met the right person when your heart is content and you are not interested in anyone else, and the possibility of ending up with anyone but him scares the hell out of you. That I think is when you are with the one.

    • Olori Ori February 23, 2016 at 7:11 pm

      Bride Ten: ‘KIlo fe ko sele si mi to ba lo’, after all the time and effort thrown on you now you tell me you want to leave. The devil is a liar! My baba is too powerful. You don enter am. Colour me ‘Juju mama’!

  • ACE February 23, 2016 at 5:43 pm

    Funny write up ! Lol… Wonder where I will fall hmmm
    *thinking*

  • Great Lady February 23, 2016 at 5:49 pm

    @Ybbil you’re so full of hate, may God forgive you .

  • Great Lady February 23, 2016 at 5:49 pm

    Really nice article. I love it.

  • Honeycrown February 23, 2016 at 5:54 pm

    Hello Obiageli, please allow me to spice up your article by adding 1 more category:
    Bride nine: I don’t even like men but I have to marry a man. “Colour me Ellen Degeneres”

  • Sabifok February 23, 2016 at 6:16 pm

    “I have been a runs girl since my teens and all through my adult life. Slept with politicians and business men for money, foreign trips and favours. I even had one keep me on a retainer and fund my lavish lifestyle including opening a spa and a shop for me, and buy me an expensive apartment on the Island. But there was always a running theme, once they had smashed me repeatedly, they tired of me and started avoiding me. After a while my reputation meant that no guy would want to date me seriously or propose marriage. Now I have bagged this innocent mugu who is a JJC in Lagos. He has lived all his life in a small town called Abakiliki. He does not know about my priors, and I didnt even sleep with him, as I have lied to him that I am a virgin. He is in for a huge surprise on our wedding night, and i mean that literally – a huge surprise. Dude worships the ground I work on. I didnt even tell him that one of my ex-aristos was the one who paid for this hall we are using, and that I even smashed another ex-aristo just 2 days ago. Colour Me Badd. Toh Badd!”

    • Md February 23, 2016 at 7:28 pm

      That is why I avoid Lagos girls ( even PH girls) like plague..I wish any guy that end up with one GOODS LUCK..Marry at your own risk

      • beauty February 23, 2016 at 9:50 pm

        I’m a Lagos girl and trust me I’m one In a million. There are still amazing ppl out there Md

    • drknite February 23, 2016 at 9:19 pm

      I love it!

    • Jade February 24, 2016 at 12:38 am

      @sabifok

      Damn! Damn! Damn is all I gotta say.
      This wan a colour me, I know no sef. That man is in for serious wahala. Men do this same thing, so I guess women are catching up.

      • sigh February 24, 2016 at 11:08 am

        True though. I’m short of words dammmmn. But the marriage can still crumble na?

  • Eva February 23, 2016 at 7:26 pm

    I like bride 6….i think I’ll be that one. Lol

  • Eva February 23, 2016 at 8:02 pm

    @honeycrown, u do know that u can leave this country and marry a woman riiiii ?? It’s no Longer a must to marry men.

    • Honeycrown February 23, 2016 at 10:13 pm

      @Eva, Honeycrown is in the strictly dickly business ?
      Let me use this opportunity to ask why you “like” Bride 6″ and you’re lol-ing about it. Or was it a typo?

  • beard gang February 23, 2016 at 9:06 pm

    @Sabifok you think you are smart? You must have slept with married men with what you have described and you expect to have a blessed home?! He who sees all stands for justice, your fair share will come to you that I guarantee you. You will remember one day that ‘ beard gang’ told you this. A marriage of deceit will NEVER yield good fruits (I don’t mean kids). You think your abakaliki trophy has not ‘lived’ your kind of life? lol. My prayer is that the almighty gives each of us the kind of spouses we deserve. AMEN. Ashawo is not my portion.

    • Sabifok February 23, 2016 at 10:32 pm

      Dude relax. I am a fella like you (unless you are a chick with bear bear). I was just giving another example

    • Chiclero February 23, 2016 at 10:39 pm

      Why so much bike? This must have really touched a nerve! Simple comprehension, she made her comment in the tone of the article, doesn’t necessarily means it’s her life story and you’re here spitting venom

    • nwanyi na aga aga February 24, 2016 at 10:21 am

      loooooooooool! Sabifok must ve hit a nervere u marrying a chick like that? Nwanna berrer go make some money so that you wont be worshiping aristo cos she has money. lol

  • beauty February 23, 2016 at 9:51 pm

    And in bride 1. After all the wait, the end is all the matters, color me bride fantasy coming true

  • Awash with memories of Trauma February 24, 2016 at 3:28 am

    Me, I be bride #4. I settled because I met someone who was nicer and more respectful than my preferred Mr. Right. I was in love with a tall, handsome, rich fulani cassanova. Ah!! I saw hell. We had that fatal type of attraction. he did not want any man saying hi to me. He would leave business meetings to be with me every darn day. We were the most incorrect couple. He even gave me a hausa nickname. 1.5 years into the relationship he decided he to cheat. How did I catch him? The first girl I knew about called his home, I picked, and she asked me to tell him to come over that she has been waiting for him all afternoon. I confronted him and he denied. She started calling everyday. Then I told him I was leaving. He confessed that he slept with her once and she wont let go. My naive self believed. The second time, a married ibo girl (an OMATA’s wife) that he slept with before my time came to town for her sister’s graduation. She asked him to help give her a ride to the school. Then he told me he would be at the graduation and that he would also go to the after party. He did not invite me. But I am liberal minded and I have male friends and thought, at least he was upfront about his company for the weekend. Monday morning, I had a nagging feeling. I went to his house at 6AM in the morning. Opened the front door, went into his bedroom and the girl was sleeping in her sexy knickers next to his shirtless boxer clothed self. I asked him what was going on and why she was not in the guest room. The girl got up jeje and went into the shower. He asked if we could talk later. I walked out so I wont be late to my precious job. Losing a man and a job in the same day was not on my list. Then two months later, he told me to return his key. I asked him why. He said he lost the other key. In Nigeria at that time, we no get places where you fit duplicate key. I gave him the key. He could have asked the guard to let me in. He could have given me the key to the kitchen door. But no. Unlike before when he would come to my office to pick me up, he would ask me to stop by. Then he would leave a note on his door saying that I could wait with his Esan neighbor. The first two times I left. I was ashamed to wait in the neighbors house. I felt like I had been demoted to a sex on demand slave. The third time, I decided to wait because I wanted to talk about this change. Well, he returned about 3 hours after he was supposed to return. When I accosted him he accused me of being insecure. Two days later he told me that his neighbor told him I was really fun to chat with. He accused me of sleeping with the neighbor. This na neighbor wey I never talk to beyond greeting before he asked me to wait for him there, if not for him making me wait in this dudes house. My very haute, tall, beautiful, too cute 22 year self cried my eyes out trying to convince this animal I did not have imaginary sex with his neighbor. He declared I was promiscuous and told me to stop coming. I went home and pined away for 3 weeks. He did not call my parents house. He did not call my office. Then one day a friend advised that I go look for him and that absence makes the heart fonder. He used to hang out at a military golf course with some friends of his. One of them lived on the military base. Foolishly, I went to the base. He was not at the golf course with his friends. But I saw one Air Vice Marshall who was chasing me with his married self at the time. He knew who I was looking for. He told me point blank that the guy was playing with me and that I was the only serious person in the relationship. He said to look for him at a third friend’s house. I carried my two left legs to this person’s house. The house owner was shocked to see me. His reaction suggested to me that I was onto something I would not like. He told me my boyfriend just left. I stupidly cried asking him when my boyfriend was going to be there again. He said usually they got together and went to the officer’s mess at about 5PM. Then my boyfriend would drop him off at about 7PM. Seems both of them were doing runz girls at the mess. He suggested that if I came to his house, the houseboy would let me in and I could meet with my boyfriend at his house. Foolish me. My mother should have flogged me. I went the next day. looking extra sexy, hair done, etc. Trying to charm man wey wan chop maggot when meat dey house. he came in as planned. Immediately he saw me he became livid. He barked asking me what I was doing in his friends house. I broke down explaining that I wanted to talk to him and that I missed him and all sorts of ignorant mushy stuff. Guy grabbed my hand and started dragging me to the front door to push me out. Kai. See insult. My father would shoot him if he was there. His precious daughter. I was so scared of being manhandled I was screaming. Then I tried to resist so I could walk out with dignity. He landed a heavy slap on my face. TWAT. Hian! I briefly saw stars. It was the first time I had been hit in my adult life. I was stunned. Even my parents stopped flogging me when I was 10, I ran out like I was chased by demons. That was the beginning of the end for me. I went home and CRIED MY EYES OUT. The next two months, friends would call me to say they saw him with all kinds of girls – one mulatto, one black, one skinny, one wide-hipped, at eateries, clubs, etc, and sadly they would think the mulatto was me. He had found another mulatto for himself. My heart shattered. I asked my dad to sponsor me on a vacay to Europe and the US. I was in love that could not be reciprocated and needed to run away. My dad agreed. My cousin was getting married that July. Maybe if I focused on career my life would be better. I told dad I might not return at the end of summer. I mentioned I wanted to go to grad school. He was supportive. Three weeks before I left for Switzerland, Fulani was knocking at my parent’s front door. He asked me if I wanted to go for a drink. You know I did not say no. I went and ended in bed with him two days later, and the next day, and the next day, and the next. He was a great lover. He told me he was sorry, blah blah blah. I was stupid enough to let him touch me after knowing he had been with other women. Thank God I did not have HIV or other bad diseases. But I was in love. It became clear to me that I loved him too much to be good to myself. After a week romping in the hay, I told him I needed to tell him something. I told him I was going for my cousin’s wedding and that I planned to stay on and go to grad school. He looked defeated and sad. There was an extra fondness in how he treated me thereafter. He treated me lovingly those last two weeks. It was like we were preparing for a permanent separation that we both could not voice. I went to Zurich and spent July and August. Then I went to America. I missed him like crazy initially. I remember crying so hard on the plane.. But he was not my husband. I had to face that fact. The story continues but, I met this short working class man years later who made me laugh and spoke to me gently in America. He was not Fulani in anyway and did not have his savvy. But he cared!!! I agreed to marry him. Fulani could not find a girlfriend or wife after me. As he would tell me later, he fell in love with me and no one could measure up to me. Finally he settled for a nice home made fulani girl that was arranged by his parents so he could move on. According to him, she has made his life a living hell. Well, that is the bed he chose to lie on and he is getting paid in kind for the torture I endured. I dont have hell or drama in my life. Hubby does not cheat. I have peace. I am however dealing with the problem of people from poor families who have too many dependents. But we are all happy. WHAT A LONG READ. Sorry but I went down memory lane a bit on this one.

    • Jo! February 24, 2016 at 6:50 am

      Wow!

    • Cocolette February 24, 2016 at 7:43 am

      Woah!!! U took a lot, and at age 22 too. I don’t think he ever fell in love with you, i hope you didn’t believe it when he said it? This kind of devil can turn up sometime in your future telling you how you know both of you never quite got over each other and reminding you of the awesome romps in the sack. If and when he does, i hope you don’t fall for it.

    • Arin February 24, 2016 at 3:12 pm

      At some point in reading tru this I went’ hehehe this is some well written fiction story” so this really did happen for real?hain

    • Honeycrown February 24, 2016 at 4:27 pm

      @Awash, your story made me laugh but I wasn’t laughing at you. It’s better to have love and peace which your current relationship provides. As for the relatives, remember you guys can’t save the world o! Hang in there and things will get better.

    • BabyDee February 24, 2016 at 8:37 pm

      Sighhhhhhhh

      I hope you actually did not believe that crap about him falling in love with you, and no other girl measured up, and the marriage was an arranged marriage and he’s going through hell? Honey, those are all lies men tell to their ex girlfriend who has moved on. It’s all in a bid to placate things. Abi men, na lie I talk?

  • vee February 24, 2016 at 5:11 am

    Hmmm! Nice read. But why did Sugarbellys face keep coming to my head as i read. ..like I love BN commenters. I have learnt alot reading bella naija articles and comments. my head is filled now with i will raise my children when they eventually come especially my daughter. The memories some people decided to create for themselves sha…

    • sultana February 25, 2016 at 11:35 am

      so right! walahi na sugabelly i was thinking of as i read the story

  • Eva February 24, 2016 at 5:56 am

    @honeycrown, I like bride 6 cos I will give him hell.

  • Mz_danielz February 24, 2016 at 9:54 am

    I haven’t been in love since I was 17, in afraid of getting hurt, I’d rather do friends with benefits but I need to marry, so I’ll marry the guy who fits the profile once I’m 28.

    Colour me #bulliedbysociety #afraidofbeinganauntyfwegs

  • Eva February 24, 2016 at 10:57 am

    @awash, u tried O.. . He cheated endlessly and slapped you and u still went ahead to keep sleeping with him?? na wa. Thank God u did catch any std. I hope you’ve worked on ur self worth.

  • Adelaide February 24, 2016 at 11:30 am

    Been reading BN for approx. 6 years now and this is the BEST POST ever, I wonder what kind of bride I’d be since I’ve never even been in a relationship and I’m nearly 23 and want to be married latest at 24. I keep saying God will do it the way he did it for Abraham by providing the ram at the right time. the ‘color me knocked up’ Bride ten suggested was also a good read.

  • hawt stuff February 24, 2016 at 11:56 am

    I am in early thirties, i have dated “tall, dark/yellow pawpaw & handsome” guys but non has made the cut. It is either they are “Scrubs(TLC throwbacks)”, “Betrothed”, “Terrible in Bed” or “NFA (No Future Ambitions)”. Now my present boyfriend is 51, a US citizen and has an ex wife(who is already married) with one child. Colour me Trophy Wife…I cannot come and die abeg. My punani needs to rest because my ex with his plenty energy can fuck for Africa (Excuse my language)

  • Bestfriend February 24, 2016 at 12:22 pm

    I must be bride 8 and 1 rolled together! We dated FOREVER!! Drifted apart got involved with other people, lost the spark. But we no gree move on!! Took a break from it all, went back to school.. Then all of a sudden we were over each other again and got married! 6years on I don’t have regrets ( well most days) . He still manages to show new sides of him, and o am working on that too!!

  • Lateefat February 24, 2016 at 1:18 pm

    Hmmmmm, very nice post and comments. trust BELLANARIANS!
    I’m getting married to a friend I met through a mutual friend. We clicked like we’ve known each other all our years. Fast forward some months after, we started having some kinda ish but mom said it’s normal. Getting married in no time and leaving everything in My Rabb’s hand, He surely knows best and will keep us in the right path. Color me #DEEN

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