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I came, I spun, I wrote

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This is an account of my first experience at Spin class. I thought I would share it because well…remembering it makes me laugh. But also to encourage anyone who is considering trying something new and quite frankly is scared that they won’t be able to cut it. Just get on that bike and do it. Life is not going to get any easier, so you have to get stronger!

I hope sharing this account of my first time in spin class will make you laugh, think and get on with the business of living life the best way you can!

In an attempt to spin my thighs into submission…I went to Spin class…in case you are wondering what exactly that is, well it is a stationary bike class on crack…crazy crack. Cheap, crazy, wack crack.

First off prayer works! At my gym, spin class is the hot ticket class. People get there an hour early, wait in line to sign up and then once the door opens, they rush into class to get the best bike…I being a novice, didn’t know it was that serious, so I got there a half hour early for the first class and found out the class was full. So the next time, I got there quite early and I got in. Secondly, the seats on the bike suck, they are so hard and your bum is bound to hurt but some smart folks get a gel cushion and it helps…somewhat. That day, the instructor Sudy took a liking to me and decided to give me hers…yep…prayer baby!

Anyway here is a breakdown about how it went.

445pm: Ok, these people are serious! People were mean mugging about their bike O! I made the mistake of approaching a taken bike and I was snarled at, chai! Fortunately I found a bike near the door, (in case I needed a quick escape!)

455pm: Sudy, the perky blond instructor, gave me her gel seat, and showed me how to position my bike, she was pretty cool even though after she found out I was Nigerian, she felt the need to share the fact that she had a brother from Tanzania, well not really, he was an exchange student, who felt like a brother whose name was cool like mine. (really Sudy?) Well anyway smile and nod! She was just relating and it was all good.

5pm: Class starts. And it is no joke, almost as soon as my thighs start a whirling, sweat starts to form in the middle of my back.

5:05pm: I get a wedgie.

5:06pm: I attempt to remove said wedgie gracefully.

5:07pm: Didn’t succeed, as evidenced by raised eyebrows of my neighbor…Whatcha looking at! Eyes forward my friend.

5:12pm: Instructor “Come on guys, you should be at 110rpm, it is supposed to hurt”

5:15pm: First newcomer gets off bike, with attitude like “Y’all can keep this s**t!

5:20pm: I am actually keeping up, but I am calling on Jesus!

5:25pm: I am reciting, I can do all things through Christ!’

5:26pm: Another wedgie

5:30pm: I start doing Lamaze breathing “Hee, Hee, Hee, Hoo, hoo hoo” again my neighbor looks at me funny!

5:32pm: Sudy gives me the thumbs up. I would return it but I am spinning for dear life.

5:35pm: Sweating buckets but determined to finish and guess what another wedgie!

5:36pm: Shoot, I decided to be one with the wedgie.

5:37pm: Pull out the wedgie and glare at the clock. What is wrong with you! Time should move already!

5:40pm: Sudy, gets off bike and comes over to high five me!

5:40pm and 15secs: I contemplate slapping her.

5:40pm and 30secs: I don’t, but my sweaty palm smacks her sweaty palm.

5:41pm: Sudy is cool peeps.

5:42pm: No she’s not, talking about “ATTACK!” which is when everyone starts cycling at some crazy speed and at high resistance.

5:43pm: I join in.

5:44pm: I conclude that she must mean Attacked instead of attack because I feel like I have come out of a battle.

5:47pm: Heavy metal music comes into rotation.

5:48pm: Suddenly I see myself with a painted face and an electric guitar…Don’t judge…it’s better than seeing my pained expression in the mirror.

5:50pm: Almost there.

5:51pm: Sudy is once more trying me, talking about finish strong!

5:52pm: I am actually feeling alright, thighs are flying, I am stronger than I thought!

5:54pm: Aww yeah, Prince comes into rotation, his voice coming through the speaker gets me through the next ATTACK!

5:56pm: I. AM. A. ROCKSTAR!

5:57pm: I dare anyone to disagree.

5:59pm: Finally we get ready to cool down. I feel like I should take a bow.

6pm: Stretch.

6:05pm: I strut out of the spin room, sweat drenched and I do mean drenched, but I am walking like I am the baddest chick. Like what! WHAT!
Here is the most important thing I learned from spin class. Sometimes you just have to get out of your comfort zone and rock your life! Sometimes you just have to be willing to look crazy and stupid to better yourself. Sometimes you have to suffer to shine.

Prologue

Today’s  update

I am still spinning.

  1. My yansh is now calcified. Seriously. I no longer feel the pain of the seat. Chai.
  2. My body still sweats like a faucet was turned on.
  3. I thought the instructor Sudy was tough…well I hadn’t met Bridget who also teaches Kickboxing and is right now, well as of yesterday less than three weeks away from her due date and still talking about “push yourself! Are you nauseous yet?” Shoot, I was having contractions for her!
  4. And of course can’t forget the old mackdaddy with blond hair and possibly dentures?(Teeth are just too straight!) who is still clubbing it every weekend (he’s at least 60) and who’s music is heavy on 50cent, Nelly and Beyonce….rock on brother!

Well, I am still on my journey, not yet at my destination but enjoying the process…trying to get somewhere and be somebody! Who’s with me?!

Be well y’all

And come by and see me at Bogobiri house, in Ikoyi on Dec 12th at 3pm.

I will be doing a reading from my new inspirational book, Can I be real! which will be released Jan 2011, but I will have some advance copies on hand.

Hope to see you there!

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