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Child Abuse: The Evil That Lives Within

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There are some things that once seen can never be unseen. There’s no amount of bleach that can  cleanse my eyes and purify them of the filth they just beheld.  It is only in a world of evil and perversion would we see a little girl of about ten or eleven (from what I saw in the video) sexually molesting a little boy about four years old. There were so many things disturbing about the video and I don’t know what was more disturbing; the fact that the girl was engaging the little boy in sexual acts that only an adult should know about or the fact that somebody stood there filming them.

As I watched the video, my blood curdled in anger and my head filled with several whys, wheres and whens

Where were their parents or guardians?

Who was the person filming?

Why was the person filming?

Why did the person filming not try to stop them?

Where  did the girl learn to do the things she was doing to the boy?

Will this little boy not be irreparably damaged by this?

It made me think about the many times we leave our kids with baby minders and helps, it made my skin crawl at the thought of this ever happening to my son. The age long issue of whether to have a live-in help or not came to mind and how much our children are exposed to while we are at work. What do we know about the relatives who live with us? In many Nigerian cultures, it is the norm for relatives to move in with us because our culture supports the “extended family syndrome” and sometimes even if we are not assured of our privacy, we know that these cousins can be helpful but how do we know what these cousins do with our children when we’re out of the house? Gone are the days when the mother stays at home to raise the children ensuring that every facet of their upbringing is strictly monitored. Today both parents work and one can not blame the parents because times are hard and the current economic climate doesn’t really afford all of us the luxury of sitting at home while our husbands lug in the fattened calf.  So as we go out in search of bread do we unwittingly leave our children at the mercy of these predators hidden in plain sight?

Has the world become so perverted that someone would see a 4 year old boy being molested and rather than put a stop to it instantly his/her first instinct is to grab a camera and make a video?

What kind of world do we live in where evil lives within our homes? In what kind of world is it alright to see something that is clearly not right and not try to stop it?

Do we have institutions that can help victims of child abuse? Is there any way of helping children who have been so traumatized by these kind of things? How do we preserve the innocence of our children?

I truly weep for the world we live in.

Photo credit: www.photopucket.com

You probably wanna read a fancy bio? But first things first! Atoke published a book titled, +234 - An Awkward Guide to Being Nigerian. It's available on Amazon. ;)  Also available at Roving Heights bookstore. Okay, let's go on to the bio: With a Masters degree in Creative Writing from Swansea University, Atoke hopes to be known as more than just a retired foodie and a FitFam adherent. She can be reached for speechwriting, copywriting, letter writing, script writing, ghost writing  and book reviews by email – [email protected]. She tweets with the handle @atoke_ | Check out her Instagram page @atoke_ and visit her website atoke.com for more information.

44 Comments

  1. kem

    May 24, 2012 at 10:03 am

    people have lost it…..gosh these is madness, unspeakable….give birth to the number of children you can take care of so you can always protect, love and take care of them, many children lack love, care, expose to so many vices, my heart is bleeding but all i can say is that, every parent must and will be answerable to God for no being there for their kids ohhhh

  2. kem

    May 24, 2012 at 10:05 am

    even if u live ur child or children with nanny or relatives, teach them how to say no or speak to you freely, most kids are afraid of their parent…

  3. Debby

    May 24, 2012 at 10:09 am

    I couldnt finish the video, because i was moved to tears! God is watching who recorded the scenes and couldnt stop the girl.
    Very evil, i just cant stop weeping for the poor boy, so innocent. People are wicked and they will surely reap evil.
    I feel so pained and scared at the same because i am a mother too!

  4. anonymous

    May 24, 2012 at 10:10 am

    i do not agree personally to the person who was videoing those children but it has helped to shine light on what goes on when parents are not around. i personally was repulsed and alarmed about the video that an eleven year old knew so much about sex. kids are exposed to all sorts these days. She must have been molested also for her to know so much. some adults dont even know as much as what the girl did to that boy. Our world has turned into something else and really all i can say is God help our kids and this generation coming up

  5. Nike

    May 24, 2012 at 10:17 am

    The author is a bloody hypocrite and has no right to feel any anger towards the person filming this atrocity cause whoever watches child pornography (yes, that is what it was) is just as guilty as the person filming it. So take your self-righteous indignation somewhere else. Rather than watching it, what a responsible adult should have done was try and trace the person who filmed it and have them prosecuted and try and get help for those poor abused children. Don’t come on BN and write about how you are so upset after you took part in the distribution of child pornography. Hypocrite!!

    • the Injustice society called Nigeria....

      May 24, 2012 at 12:18 pm

      GBAM!!!!!!…….WELL SAID…when i heard about this…I cannot and would not bring myself to watch such a video…the people watching it are indirectly condoning it…instead that girl/boy should get help and the person who filmed it …ARRESTED!!1…Child pornography is atrocious…

    • Tiki

      May 24, 2012 at 3:19 pm

      So, you would prefer that the author find the person responsible etc etc etc…how? Based on the word of mouth that the video exists? Should they walk up into a child abuse center and go ‘I hear a girl molested a boy, please go on the internet, look for the video, find the girl in it and punish her’? Before insulting people, please employ your brain in the examination of what you are about to say.

    • Nike

      May 24, 2012 at 10:37 pm

      @Tiki, don’t be simple-minded girl, )ou know that is not what I meant
      Flex your brain muscles just a tad and you will get my point. If you still can’t
      understand, then God help you.

    • Cutie Toxie

      May 24, 2012 at 5:48 pm

      This is tantamount to saying that CNN shouldn’t have reported the terrorists attack of 9-11 but instead led the SWOT team to bring down Osama Bin Laden yea?
      I’m trying to understand your point ni oh!

  6. missappleberry

    May 24, 2012 at 10:22 am

    I was speechless wen I watched dat video. M still speechless as I comment on dis article. But I wud just say, d people with bigger probs are d adult who actually taught and must have molested dat 11yrs old gurl, 2 make her so skilled in such an act. The person recording it needs help as well. It is likely 4 dat 4yrs old boy 2 actualy grow up and 4get if taken away 4rm dat environmentt but d girl seriously needs help cos she is finished. God save our little children 🙁 Nice article by d way

  7. olubukola

    May 24, 2012 at 10:48 am

    From what i have heard about the video , i do not want to watch it! Its truly a wicked world we live in…
    Whilst the ‘videographer’ should be traced and questioned/prosecuted, we need to direct our energies to those children, its obvious the girl was molested by someone based on ‘her experience’ and now she is taking in on a 4 year old boy who will molest someone who will also molest someone… and the evil cycle continues! Those kids need serious rehabilitation.
    The sad part is that there are thousands ,probably millions who have experienced such hideous act!

  8. zuu

    May 24, 2012 at 10:49 am

    where”s d video?

    • jonzing

      May 24, 2012 at 11:22 am

      Why do you want to see the video #Pervert oshi

    • Partyrider

      May 24, 2012 at 11:30 am

      Are you seriously asking for the video? *hiss* after reading the terrible thing that the video contained you still want to watch..

  9. Daizy

    May 24, 2012 at 11:09 am

    I have seen the video too. It’s a horrible sight & really can’t be unseen. It’s a terrible shame. Sharing the link though would be engaging in distribution of child porn.

  10. Mz B

    May 24, 2012 at 11:58 am

    what shocks me is how many people who have commented have watched the video! sick, sick, sick

    and i agree with Nike above!

  11. bella

    May 24, 2012 at 12:52 pm

    this nike get issues, how is the writer supposed to trace the person videoing it.is the person working with CIA?Atleast the writer raised some kinda awareness.And what did u do?

    • Nike

      May 24, 2012 at 2:21 pm

      Sorry my luv but you are the one that has some serious issues to contend with. The fact that you dont see anything wrong should give you cause to worry at night. Just saying

  12. marvel

    May 24, 2012 at 1:11 pm

    BN, be careful not to be linked with the distribution/access to child porn. That is a crime. There are ways to highlight attention to causes but not to have people view the video. I hope that the girl’s face is shielded from the public, as she is herself a minor and no doubt a victim too. One must be careful not to promote further abuse in the name of being repulsed. Those in the UK, make sure you don’t download cos when the Police knock on your door, you will know…

    • Cutie Toxie

      May 24, 2012 at 1:56 pm

      Ogbeni… Did you see a video on the site?

      There are ways not to come off as ignorant on the internet!

  13. seun

    May 24, 2012 at 1:13 pm

    I gotta say the title should be Sexual child abuse. There are different things classified as child abuse, like neglect, beating etc. Anyways it saddens me. I read a commenter’s testimony on Linda Ikeji’s blog on how his relative more than 14 years his senior raped him and the sad part is that there were twins born out of the union and his parents protected the girl when the truth came out and he was blamed. I think its sad that parents dont listen to their children when they tell them they have been abused or even see signs of abuse on their children till its too late. Mothers especially have the job to protect their offspring, but most of the time they are the ones who ignore or even accuse the child of being fast. I think its time we shine our eyes and call evil evil. I saw how people here and other blogs were thirsty to see the perversion of a video, and it saddened me because those people have demons in them that if left to the act they would sexually abuse a child, or a minor. Its disgusting, because after they watch it they come here raining abuses and so on when they too have taken part in the abuse by watching it. Finally I think its time parents teach their children and not just girls that certain touchings or actions are not right, be it by a friend or relative.

  14. Upnaija

    May 24, 2012 at 1:23 pm

    its a pity at this age? what a sin!

  15. kathryn Cage

    May 24, 2012 at 2:05 pm

    Has any one stopped to think that the person videoing may have informed the parents of the boy or girl about his observations and no one believed him hence he decided to video it? it is possible that the girl is possessed cos no one will ever imagine that an 11year old will be capable of such sin. I condemned the person that filmed it initially but after deep thoughts, i changed my mind. he may have done if as a proof!

    • Nike

      May 24, 2012 at 2:20 pm

      Proof of what? Why could he/she not stop it? Please enough of this fetish excuses of possession, the real demons are human beings themselves.

  16. AC

    May 24, 2012 at 4:00 pm

    Child abuse has been an ongoing problem in our society for a very long time. I am a victim of sexual child abuse which occured before I even turned 11 years of age. Today, I don’t see myself getting married because I don’t feel comfortable sharing my body with anyone. Until Nigerian society begin to speak openly against this stuff and bring the perpetrators of the crime to book, these things will continue. Our culture is a very negative one I must say where rape, child abuse, child sexual abuse, domestic violence and the likes are very common and swept under the rug. Nigeria is a chuvinist society where anything goes. Both men and women are guilty of sweeping this atrocity under the carpet. Anyways, God is watching and I feel sorry for the younger generation and those generations yet unborn because things are only going to get worse. Signs of the end times.

  17. Beverly

    May 24, 2012 at 4:02 pm

    It is one thing to video for evidence for all the Parents/guardians involved but to video so much without stopping it, by most accounts is very telling about the character of the person , unless this idiot is a teenager themselves. And for all that is sacred why did anybody upload this?
    As for the rest of you abroad, I hope you will not view this video or click on it if you find the link. I refuse to view it. Possession – Viewing,downloading and distribution of child pornography is a crime.

  18. Angie

    May 24, 2012 at 4:09 pm

    First of all, anyone who took time to watch that video is sick, sick, sick!!! I got that link on my BB stating what was in it and i refused to open it. Then unfortunately for me, someone else sent me another BB link just talking about child abuse and I inadvertently opened it and as soon as I saw what it was I closed it and immediately deleted that link from my BB. Do you know why? My conscience will never allow me sit and watch such – PRIME CASE OF CHILD PORNOGRAPHY. Has anyone of you even thought that your kids might come across this link on your BBs and laptops? I weep for both kids, they are both victims here. I curse the person who made this recording and hope he/she can see the backlash coming from it. Anyone who could see such and stand and record it is vile. What proof could he/she have been getting and what reason can justify that as proof? The person who filmed this is a paedophile and must have trained the girl on what to do. May God help us and give us the wisdom to do right by our kids.

  19. Chloeze

    May 24, 2012 at 4:38 pm

    I have not and will never watch dat video for watsoever reason. From wat I heard it is heart chilling and horrid so why subject myself to such torture. I implore all parents to teach their kids about their bodies and how to say no to all these predators. Trust nobody, from relatives to total strangers. I have taught my daughter that nobody is allowed to kiss her except mummy and daddy. I also told her dat she should say no to anyone who tries to touches her ‘wewe’ and ‘poopoo’ bum bum. She is also to tell me if somebody does and I intend teaching her more as she grows. She only 3. Most of all we have to continuously pray that God keeps our kids safe from evil becos we can’t be everywhere at once.

  20. Claire

    May 24, 2012 at 4:40 pm

    …speechless…I pray for the kids I would have and their generation…can’t bear to think it…

  21. konnie

    May 24, 2012 at 5:16 pm

    The videographer should be tracked down to establish that this is not a child pornography film that was uploaded for viewing. maybe there are more tapes out there. At lest so that avenue can be shut down.
    The children need help too otherwise this cycle will never stop. That is the ting with evil, it keeps propagating and manifesting in different ways until it is confronted.

    this tape could have come from a nanny cam because someone suspected that something odious was going on.

    All the same, people have to be vigilant and we all need to pray about humanity.

  22. FUNMI

    May 24, 2012 at 5:20 pm

    This is actually very really and has long been in existence for long. when i was young, our house girl makes me suck her breast every night until my mum fired her after 3months( she actually did something else).
    Let me share another that happened to my when i was just 9yrs old (1994) . On my way from sch (Primary) one day as i board a bus going home(Iyana-Ipaja to Agege), A young man opted to lap me on his feet since i was small and tiny, i quickly jumped at the offer(to save my money for Tastytime). The bus was got filled and left the park. The man lapped me at the back sit and was moving his legs as if he was trying to pick something from his trouser while i raise myself up a bit from his laps for him to get comfortable. Has all the passenger at the back sit dropped at their various bus stop, the back sit was becoming empty and the young man spread my legs with his legs all of a sudden, i felt a sharp pain at in my private part. As i looked down to see what was going on, he had already unzipped his trouser and brought out his p***s and was making attempt to shift my pantie sideways. At this time, there where few pple left in the car and only us left at the back sit. i jumped away from the man’s leg which attracted the passengers sitting in front as they looked back to see what was happening but the man was quick to cover his manhood with his suit. I quickly told the conductor to drop me at the next busstop which was luckily my busstop. I couldnt tell anybody what happened then when i got home cause i wasnt too free to discuss such an incident with my parents.
    Child molestation is very real and Parents need to be more watchful and make their children have their trust.

  23. speaking of Which

    May 24, 2012 at 5:50 pm

    i am more concerned about the root of this whole thing. I watched the video and it got me thinking, i dont have anything against the person that filmed, if it hadnt been filmed i would never believed it if anyone told me. But lets look at this critically, its a case of Predator-Prey and Prey-Prey. we are talking of an Eleven year old girl and a Four years old boy. For Christ sake that girl did not bring that knowledge from Heaven, she must have seen and learnt it somewhere. The way she even went about it, for a matured person like i am, those are not d skill of a first timer, not even a 10th timer. so where did she learn, and who has been doing it to her. Even the look on the girl’s face shows how unsatisfied she was, as well as the way she was looking around. it shows she know she is doing something wrong and is trying to be discreet, pls those are not the thinking of an 11yrs old. Its means a monster of a man has turned that girl into a psychological time-bomb which is what is exhibited ,in that video.
    I feel sad abou this video, but this is a wake up call as to parent to take out time and be close to their children. Proper and constant observation is very important alongside constant prayer to GOD to help us take care of them when we are not there.
    For me the problem is not the girl not d pervert film maker, rather on the decadence that has set in because of our neglect as parents.

    • Lucy

      May 24, 2012 at 10:55 pm

      You are very disgusting. Even reading your comment wanted to make me puke, and I literally felt my skin crawl. Shu, see how you were analysing, as if u watched the video for an exam. I went to visit a friend, and she said I should come and watch video. I thought it was those funny you tube videos, only to see the shock of my life. I told her to close the laptop one time. The person that filmed it must be the lowest scum of the earth. Some people are saying here that whomever recorded it did it as proof, but I beg to differ, that person is vile. I don’t know the duration of the video but to record it, and not stop them, and to then distribute, gives me serious heebie jeebies. Whomever recorded it may not have been the one to upload it, but he/she obviously showed someone who distributed it. The evil that reigns supreme in this world, we are obviously living in the end times.

  24. christy

    May 24, 2012 at 9:52 pm

    Because zuu requested for the video,u guys all hurled curse on him,self righteous people in this blog, can’t you all just ignore and move on,u will be amaze by who they are in real life,is there anything new under the surface of the earth.in as much as I condemn such act in totally,I see no reason why I should be nail in trying to view it.mend ur home,such act mostly comes from broken families and children out of wedlock.BN my two cent even if you don’t post my comment

  25. christy

    May 24, 2012 at 9:54 pm

    Because zuu requested for the video,u guys all hurled curse on him,self righteous people in this blog, can’t you all just ignore and move on,u will be amaze by who they are in real life,is there anything new under the surface of the earth.in as much as I condemn such act in totality,I see no reason why I should be nail in trying to view it.mend ur home,such act mostly comes from broken families and children bornout of wedlock.BN my two cent even if you don’t post my comment

  26. iamfascinating

    May 24, 2012 at 9:54 pm

    too sad,

  27. Lucy

    May 24, 2012 at 11:20 pm

    I will like to share with everyone the manner I was raised. If it inspires parents out there, my work is done. I grew up in a house of girls, my mum never left a child alone with any house help. She always made sure that we were two at least. She never left any child alone even with a driver to pick us from school, and even with any uncle or aunty. NO child was left alone with anyone even family, except our grandparents. No driver could pick us from school or drop us anywhere alone. If we were to go spend time with our friends, she always made sure that their parents were around, we were never allowed to go play at our friends or cousins house, if the maid was the only supervisor. Yes I’m an adult now, and I’m very shy and quiet, but you know what, I don’t regret it, and with the sick disgusting world we live in, I will parent my children like that too. People, maids and driver collude to molest children, so don’t ever let your child/children have play dates with family friends that don’t have children yet, or those ones that do and leave their kids in charge of their house help. Never. Also explain to your children, that no one is allowed to touch some parts of their bodies, and they are not allowed to touch some parts of adult’s bodies. If an uncle/aunty is hugging them tightly for too long, and touching them here and there, wriggle out from the person’s embrace and move far away from the person immediately, and tell mummy and daddy secretly in their ear. My parents even made it into a game, whisper secrets in their ear, so we were never afraid of telling them anything. My mother explained this to us when giving us a bath, no one should touch you here or here, never talk to strangers, or accept anything from them. Never sit on the lap of anyone for any reason if mummy and daddy/grandparents are not around. Those harmless, let me drop you off at uncle/aunty so so’s house for the weekend. If you can’t guarantee that the parents will be home through out, don’t try it. Tell your kids, make sure you are never alone with an adult, always call your sisters, or your friends, never let any adult trick you into sending your sisters or friends to get something, and leave you alone with him/her, run along with them too, and tell him/her you want to also help them get whatever it is. Always tell your daughters they are beautiful, special, pretty, adorable, princesses. If they hear it often at home, no one can tell that to them outside and they’ll feel good about it, and lure them to perform evil acts. Tell your son he’s your prince, your champion, your little hero, your little man, he doesn’t need anyone’s approval except mummy and daddy, so he shouldn’t do anything mummy and daddy says he shouldn’t do in order to make anyone happy. Kids need to understand the dangers out there, and openly discuss it with them so they are not childishly ignorant. Discuss with them the likely intentions of adults when they show them unnecessary attention, so that they are at least aware. Knowledge is power and can save your child’s life

  28. Thatgidigirl

    May 24, 2012 at 11:29 pm

    Puhleeeze!Nike really has got some serious issues! you should check yourself before calling someone else a hypocrite. Mentality like yours (which is largely portrayed in your comments) and unneccessary holier than thou attitude is what makes most nigerian parents neglect sex education. People like you are the ones that cover their children’s eyes during kissing scenes in movies, and tell them the word “vagina” is a bad word rather than educate them properly on their bodies, because you are too busy pointing fingers. Most people who watched that video wld probably pay closer attention to their children and maids now. Please wisen up! good and evil exists, and refusing to talk about evil or expose it doesn’t make it go away automatically.

  29. Daizy

    May 25, 2012 at 2:41 am

    Na wa O! All those saying the watchers are sick, what if they didn’t know what the link was when they got it. When the video was sent I honestly thought it was something funny, only to open it & see the horror. It’s of no use tossing insults back and forth.
    By the way, where was it said that she was 11 years old?

  30. tracy

    May 25, 2012 at 7:37 am

    The truth of the matter is that an adult has been molesting that little girl,for her to know so much about sex,our environment has made it almost impossible for mothers to stay home and keep an eye on their kids,I couldn’t even finish watching d video cos I found it so wrong and disgusting,more concern is more for dat little girl,only God knows d Bastard dat must have been sleeping with her nd making do all those stuffs on him for her to b so knowledgeable,not to talk about the damage it must have done to her psychologically and health wise,with all the venereal disease that wwe have flying around dis days.my heart goes out to both their parents,nd am sure d little boy is her brother or relation that’s why she had acess to him.God help us all

  31. Naija Lee

    May 25, 2012 at 10:04 am

    Comments here is another evidence that we have no clue as to how to solve issues\problems. We are the best when it comes to condemning and raining abuses,we are so excellent at passing blames,fighting synptoms.but we have become so lame at tracing a problem to its root cause. How many people have bothered here to think that kids of today hav easier access to adult pornography, where they learn all these skills? How many have bothered to agree that parenting has totally failed globally? Moral haves gone, every collapsed, yet we expect kids to act right? That’s impossible. Live moral and upright lives first before these kids,be an example first and not the hypocrites we have all become. Maybe then, we will start to see some changes in these kids

  32. Boomiee

    May 25, 2012 at 10:41 am

    The link should be destroyed completely and people with the link shouldnt copy and re forward to someone else.I can only pray that God will save this little innocent ones from peadophiles,rapists, molestors and every evil lurking around. The God factor must be everly present in parenting as your effort can never be enough. You have to work,go out and do some things without being at home allways but try as parent to do your possible best at good and positive parenting.
    I sincerely pray for the angels of God to visit those two children and deliver them from what they have been exposed to and my prayers to other kids suffering such in silence.
    May God come through for this little ones.

  33. Al-baby

    May 25, 2012 at 12:05 pm

    In truth, both of the kids are minors and I believe victims. They girl has been exposed to such acts early in her life and is just carrying out the same act with the boy. Although, I’m sure that she understands by now that her acts are wrong, she still can’t help herself. She can only do that if her acts are exposed to her parents/guardian. For all we know, the little boy might be her younger brother or cousin whose parents trust her.
    The only thing that would have justified this video was if the photographer (who might be in his teens) was to rather than distributing the video online take the video to the guardian of the little boy and the girl in the video to the police (God help us with our security officer) who would have been able to handle the matter. Sexual abuse against is a serious offence and we have juvenile homes or centers where such people should be helped. My only fear is that in a place like Nigeria where such a girl should be helped as well, she will be seriously beaten by her parents/guardians as if that solves the problem.
    I feel sorry for the little boy because that environment does not look like one that can find him the help he needs.

  34. Olori Charles

    May 25, 2012 at 8:47 pm

    The act of wickedness leads to self destruction, mental imbalance and of course SUDDEN DEATH. Our children are our pride and future, we need to always watch what they are up to. The person that filmed that video has judgment waiting for him.

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