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Nkem Ndem: 5 Irritating Lies Nigerian Men Tell

Nkem Ndem



Nkem NdemHas a Nigerian guy ever lied to you so blatantly that you just wanted to take off your bra, so your mammary glands would, at least, jiggle for effect when you clap at him and shout “Laya ! Laaayaaa! Uncle…you are a laya!”? I had the strong urge to defy decorum and do just that two days ago when I ran into a friend’s love interest at the Palms Mall, VI, on Valentine’s Day. Unknown to him, I had seen him stroll in hand–in-hand with another girl earlier on while I was at Double 4. Somehow he had broken away from the girl and was alone when I bumped into him in front of Mango, both of us going in opposite directions. He was holding two large Mango paper bags and an extra one from MAC.
“Hi, Seyi, fancy running into you…what are you doing here?” I greeted cheerfully.
“Hey!” He responded, slightly startled. “I just rushed in to pick up a few groceries from Shoprite, you know how we bachelors do, no wifey to help us gather things…your friend is forming madam now, she does not want to cook for me.”
“Oh, really?” I laughed “So, you are here …on your own…to buy food stuff?” I asked. I do not know why I set the trap for him, but in all truth, I was hoping he wouldn’t fall into it. I mean, I could literally see the bags in his hands, and I knew they did not contain foodstuff. Unfortunately, his reply was disappointing: “Before? Who do I want to come with? I have to take care of me, for me and give myself the joy that ‘me’ needs” he replied grinning.
The dude actually even tried to pull off a rhyme with his lies! For a minute, I wanted to call him out and ask about the bags and the girl, but then…he was not my love interest, and pucknosing is not style. Also, he and my friend were not even official yet. I just ended our small talk and left.

As I sat through the traffic on the way home, I battled with the urge to call my friend and give her the gist. But then, I knew I didn’t have all the facts and in spilling the beans, I may be nipping a possible “happy ever after” in the bud, based on assumptions fostered by Prince Charming’s white lie. To distract myself, I started on a list of annoying lies I had heard from Nigerian men over time…and guess what? The list turned out to be for Africa! Immediately, I decided I would share some of the most irritating in an article for the benefit of the unsuspecting female folk. Here are the main five:

I’m single
There is nothing worse than being made a mistress or side chick and you don’t even know it. You meet a guy and he tells you he is single but two months later, you wake up to find yourself tagged on his wedding picture posts on Instagram; or worse, you get a call from an angry fiancée or wife threatening to pour acid on you if you don’t leave her man. Some guys would try to play smart by telling you that they may not be “technically” divorced or broken up, but they are no longer together with their wife or girlfriend/fiancée of 15 years . Please, do not feel comfortable thinking you’re about to get a good man that some other woman has let go. Run. They are taking a “break” or letting off some steam with you, 9 out of 10, they will go back to their wife or fiancée.

I wasn’t checking her out
While some Nigerian guys have perfected the art of looking covertly, there are some that just cannot hold themselves, their eyes bulge out and stay glued to any hot chick in their vicinity. A guy checking out or ogling another girl while he is with you does not necessarily mean he does not appreciate you, he thinks the other girl is prettier or he wants to dump you and go after the girl; it just means he does not respect you enough to save you the hurt or embarrassment. One time I was on a date with a guy I met in Port Harcourt, unknown to me, he had not seen a mixed girl up-close prior to that time (that just had to be the explanation). The minute one walked in, he was all but literally drooling. I had to pinch him, and as expected, he said: I wasn’t checking her out, and I was like: “so, what? Your eyes lost nerve function and remained fixed on her the minute she breached your line of vision?” He denied it and went on to claim he had not even registered the presence of the girl until I accused him. Typical.

I don’t know who she is /why she keeps calling me
This is a classic line every Nigerian player gives when he wants to avoid being caught…but do you even need to consider it? Obviously, he gave this desperate girl his number, otherwise how else would she have it… especially if it is his personal number and he is not a celebrity? Again, he most certainly did not tell her that he is in a relationship as why else would she feel so comfortable calling him at any hour of the day, even calling back when he does not pick the first time? Bottom line: He knows the girl, and this girl keeps calling him because he is leading her on! In fact, chances are he is cheating on you or attempting to cheat on you. Either way, you may want to get to the root of the matter. To cut out suspicion – which is a huge destroyer in relationships, ask him to respond to the call while with you, engaging her in a conversation while on speaker phone. Also, ask him to tell the girl he has a girlfriend he is in love with and is not interested in her. This sounds silly, but it most usually reveals the truth. If he starts with the “you don’t trust me” line, Nne, pack your load and go.

Gosh, I left my wallet
I believe this lie should be embarrassing, but it is amazing how often full-grown Nigerian men use it on girls. A guy wants to impress a girl, but he cannot afford to, so he tries to play smart by saying he left his wallet, that way the girl pays to save them the embarrassment of being tackled by the restaurant management. In my opinion, the guys that tell this lie are weak guys that do not have a vision for their lives. They love to leech on others every opportunity they get. A friend had a funny incident: A guy invited her on a date to see a movie with him at Genesis deluxe Cinema. They had agreed on a 5pm movie, and she, being prim and proper, arrived quite early, only to have the guy call by 4:50 to say he was caught in traffic. He asked her to buy the two tickets, go on to start the movie without him, and bring out his ticket for him when he arrived the venue, he would refund her. About 30 minutes past 5, the guy arrived, took the extra ticket, saw the movie, did not say a word about refund afterwards, but took her to soul lounge instead for drinks. While at the lounge, this dude ordered Buffalo wings and a cocktail (Long Island), asked her to make her order, which she did and when the waiters brought the bill, he told her “Babe, you won’t believe it, I left my wallet”. My smart friend quickly replied: “oh, I don’t have enough cash on me” and he further said: “What about your ATM card?” Very good at hiding her emotions, she just smiled and said very meekly: “oh, yeah, it’s in my car, let me go and get it”. My girl drove home.

I would never lie to you
This is the award-winning lie. Some gullible girls actually believe their boyfriends when he tells them he would never lie to them. The truth is simple: EVERYONE lies for good reasons, bad reasons and everything else in between. It is part of what makes us human. If he can lie about the food he ate or where he ate it, who that private call was from or even how old he is, then he will not hesitate to lie about huge things like getting a girl pregnant, being HIV positive, living a double life or even his parents not liking you. A serious guy would rather say: I try my best to make sure I do not lie to you.

Nigerian men -Igbo, Yoruba, Hausa, Idoma…all the tribes- seem to be united when it comes to the kind of lies they tell. Of course, not all the men in the country are perpetual liars. The ones who have a knack for lying are just greater in number, and they have made it very difficult for the ones who strive, to be honest at all times. What do you think? Have you been told any of these lies? Do you have more irritating lies to share? Let’s talk about it in the comment section.

Nkem Ndem is a dynamic freelance writer and editor who can be reached for copywriting, editing and proofreading. She is also a content creator (web, T.V, radio) who has had stints with Jumia and SpiceTV Africa e.t.c. Now she works at Glam Africa as Online editor and BellaNaija as Features writer. E-mail: [email protected]; IG: @kem_dem; Twitter: @ndemv


  1. bijouxthisbijouthat

    February 24, 2016 at 11:14 am

    Watch out girl!! The comment section is about to get hot! The usual chorus about ”is it only men articles you can write on” is about to be sang.

    Anyways i thought i had developed the SOP for catching out lying men but guess what? I just fell victim to one! Still suffering from a mini heartbreak… I mean i still cant believe i was that gullible,i guess its that part that pains me most. Number 1 and 5!!

    • charles

      February 24, 2016 at 12:55 pm

      Wow…When I come to Bella and read comments & articles about how “NIGERIAN MEN” are beasts, drunks,cheats,liars and what have you, I sometimes think “NIGERIAN WOMEN” fell from the sky or were “Made in Heaven” & so are spotless, guiltless, Holy & Virtuous.

    • gia

      February 25, 2016 at 4:39 pm

      Please,compared to naija men,naija women are saints!

  2. TZ

    February 24, 2016 at 11:27 am

    very well put and to think this same Nigerian men cannot handle their wives/girlfriends talking to another man talkless of cheating on them. hmmmmm Nigerian men don’t worry o Carma Is a B**** and Naija babes done open eye.

  3. TwoGirlzOneCity

    February 24, 2016 at 11:56 am

    HaHa, your friend is super smart to drive home. “I am single” has to be the most used one ever,everyone is single in Lagos.

    Sayo & Jomi

  4. Chris moore

    February 24, 2016 at 11:58 am

    Hi I need a lady 4 good relationship dat will lead 2 May marriage, she must b frm good home wit good attitude and good christian my pin 5C0AC160 I like sm1 wit big bombom who’s a resident in Lagos. Tnx

    • zarah babay loke

      February 24, 2016 at 12:35 pm

      Big bom bom.
      Meanwhile Nkem your friend really jam one chance oh oga gan omo alayi je bread ri ni bobo yen. Thank God she ran for her life

    • X-Factor

      February 24, 2016 at 12:50 pm

      Big bom bom or christian which one is priority?

    • Ruby

      February 24, 2016 at 1:05 pm

      Natural or artificial please? LOL

    • whocares

      February 24, 2016 at 2:49 pm

      @Chris- Ahan, you didn’t find wife the last time you posted your message? I think big “bombom” and Christianity are mutually exclusive o. Chose one or the other na. Is is the bombom that will be firing prayers at 1 2midnight ni? Alainikanse. LMAOOO. May marriage. looool. Konji is about to finish our brother here. Pele.

    • o

      February 24, 2016 at 3:15 pm

      Let him try na, there are plenty Christian ladies with big bombom, that can fire prayers and other things day and night… Bro is allowed to hope …lolllzzzzz

    • o

      February 24, 2016 at 2:57 pm

      Since you are looking for “big bombom”, I hope you have a very long, thick and big schlong to complement her…cos i dont think any girl will want pinky size…lol… *runs away*

    • Amanda

      February 24, 2016 at 4:31 pm

      Lmao @ Big bom bom. I remember reading a comment some weeks back on here about someone looking for a lady with big bom bom that can speak in tongues. May you find the lady with the combo you are looking for.

    • mo

      February 24, 2016 at 5:38 pm

      Go to SDK. She will make it a post. U go get one from one of her jobless abandoned wives

    • Osa

      February 24, 2016 at 10:49 pm

      @ Chris Moore, nawa o

  5. Puzzles

    February 24, 2016 at 12:08 pm

    True story
    He said, “My Ex is just disturbing me. I told her it can never happen between us. She just comes to me for advice. I feel sorry for her”
    He confessed months later that he was sleeping with her.

    He said, “That girl is just calling me o. I didn’t do anything to lead her on. I was just being nice picking her call”. He didn’t know when he slipped 30 minutes later that he and the girl spoke for over two hours on a particular issue.

    Men, I hail una o.

  6. Men, Men everyday

    February 24, 2016 at 12:09 pm

    Go for scan baby!
    Everything in your head, blood, genotype, water and all body composition is about men!
    Ehn lies men tell. Ever seen a lady lie b4?
    they lie everyday and is worse
    now can you get off my screen?

    • funmi oguns

      February 24, 2016 at 4:58 pm

      Don’t Be. Rude

  7. Kelechi

    February 24, 2016 at 12:10 pm

    Tbh looking like that, I wouldn’t even stress about lying to you. You should be impressed with what ever is dished out to you. I don’t even get why men will lie about a lady that is below 5/10.

    • Puzzles

      February 24, 2016 at 12:44 pm

      Kelechi, that’s a very nasty thing to say to another person. You should be better than this.

    • o

      February 24, 2016 at 3:04 pm

      I don’t know why you would expect more from Kelechi. He’s fond of saying stupid and nasty things. Same guy that told us here he told his then babe to abort…… abeg pay him no attention, na him way….mschewwww

    • ada

      February 24, 2016 at 1:00 pm

      I am not sure why a guy would go for a girl that is “below 5/10”. Let’s see, perhaps because he is definitely nothing.

    • iyke

      February 24, 2016 at 2:09 pm

      @kelechi, that was rude and disrespectful. ..a very big form of abuse … you don’t do that to a lady.
      Retrace your statement buddy, and apologize!

    • iyke

      February 24, 2016 at 2:12 pm

      ****Retract***** I meant!

    • Nuna

      February 24, 2016 at 3:01 pm

      Honestly this guy is a complete moron! Isnt he thesame cow that paid for a chic to get an abortion for him and was feeling proud and manly?? Seriously BN all these educated illiterates and their comments on here are just annoying!

    • kele

      February 24, 2016 at 5:27 pm

      I am so embarrassed that you are my namesake.

      Be stupid with your other name. Please.

    • Cocolette

      February 24, 2016 at 7:07 pm

      “Be stupid with your other name” lmao ?

    • o

      February 24, 2016 at 8:53 pm

      I’m actually ROTFL….what????? that’s a first for me; “be stupid with your other name”…buhahahahaha

    • R. Kelly

      February 26, 2016 at 12:24 pm

      @Kelechi, from your response, it is obvious you are weak, small minded, not too brilliant and you have an inferiority complex. Why wont you think she is less than 5/10, you surely don’t have the eye or brain to see what is good or appreciate quality when you see it. From her write-ups, it is apparent she is brilliant, and that alone rates her very high. Go and get a brain ode…and…biko Gerrarahere !

  8. DIddy

    February 24, 2016 at 12:39 pm

    So which of the category of lies do you fall under and don’t come lying to us that u have never fall a victim cos if u claim that, then u r not different from the type of guys u have listed above.i guess u have brothers, male cousins, male relatives and definitely they must fall under these categories,so how have u been able to influence them positively trying to change their ways or u just sit and watch them trick every lady that comes their way? Every time men cheat, men abuse, men lie, men this, men that, writer your life must be revolve round men so continue writing and don’t stop.mtcheew

  9. femfem

    February 24, 2016 at 12:41 pm

    Hehe hehe hehe I hope they made that guy wash plates all day

  10. tt

    February 24, 2016 at 12:55 pm

    pucknosing or pokenosing?

  11. Blondie

    February 24, 2016 at 12:57 pm

    And i keep asking the guys.. if all of u say you’re single, then who are the girls in relationships dating???

  12. Nkem Ndem

    Nkem Ndem

    February 24, 2016 at 12:59 pm

    @Zarah babay loke: True words! @Diddy: check No.2 🙂

  13. Ruby

    February 24, 2016 at 1:09 pm

    @Nkem, see what you have caused now.

    Recently reconnected with an old college mate who I am currently so into. #LoveStruck I had a crush on him back in college sef but now…I’m in love. #Singing
    Bobo told me “I’m single”. After reading your article now, I’m all so suspicious….need to pull off some CIA things…I will be back.

  14. pinopino

    February 24, 2016 at 1:09 pm

    so I met this posh dude who lives in port Harcourt and we started dating. after 2years, we decided to consummate our relationship.Then I got a condom our from my purse and the guy said we wont need that. don’t you trust me?? bla bla bla. I’ve not had sex in 3 years etc?? really? you think I’m a mugu.
    I just wore my clothes, packed my stuff and left. The dude blocked me on facebook. Good riddance. I was well aware that most Nigerian men are walking STD’s. eww

    • Tosin

      February 24, 2016 at 5:45 pm

      best story ever.
      the moral of the story: if you must lie, please, do it in moderation. 😀 😀

  15. Alpha Male

    February 24, 2016 at 1:15 pm

    Naija men are cheat, laya, philanders, and all the negative things.
    Who are they cheating with, goats or their fellow men?
    Women are their own problem.
    I can’t eat another man’s meat l, but women do, in fact it’s when you tell them you are married or engaged that’s when they try harder in seducing you.
    Women. Solve your own problem.

  16. MEE

    February 24, 2016 at 1:15 pm

    I’m a woman. And I really think you write very well. Honest. I mean, I’ve never been bored with your articles so I obviously find them interesting. But I’d like to read something else from you, something besides the eight things men do, the five things men don’t do etc. Except, of course, this is your niche or one you’re creating for yourself

  17. Nkem Ndem

    Nkem Ndem

    February 24, 2016 at 1:20 pm

    @Ruby: LOL.Pele,i’ll sha be waiting for the gist oh @pinopino:LWKMD, it is well.

  18. I might have been lied to!

    February 24, 2016 at 1:29 pm

    Wait o, I have never posted a sob story on BN but now I need to post one just because of this topic. After I met husband man, I did not agree to knack him then (I was 28 and a virgin). HE dated me for about 4 months then he said he couldn’t handle it and he left. He came back to me after 4 months and we resumed dating, now we are married (we did knack about 5 months after he came back).

    Sometimes I ask him what/who he did the period he left me and he says “nobody, I waited for you”. ME I believed him o, because I WAITED for him. I didn’t date anyone, I didn’t kiss anyone, I WAITED. So it was easy for me to believe he waited for me.

    Just before we married, my Mom asked me how I knew that he was the one for me, and I gave this he waited for me story as one reason. My cousin wey dey there at there at the time said I was foolish and naive, talk say na lie wey hubby dey lie say he must have done someone else!

    I defended Bobo to death. But with this article now and with Nkem’s claims say men sabi lie. I dey think say me dey naive at the time o! That Bobo might have lied o! I would really want to know if he lied to me, just so that I will know if I have been trusting a liar all this time.

    • Men, Men everyday

      February 24, 2016 at 1:53 pm

      So if you do know, what will happen?
      Divorce him?

      You are simply on your own

      This is why the bible says you should guard your heart with all diligence…..
      You can never read anything good from these single girls here
      Just divorce him make one of them enter ok

      baalu like u

    • Nonso

      February 24, 2016 at 2:44 pm

      What is really ur issue? Pls move on! whether he lied or not is not even important anymore. It’s like ur very less busy. Get something to do pls!

    • Tea

      February 24, 2016 at 4:54 pm

      My dear abeg do not scatter ur marriage with stuff u read on-line.
      Don’t ask him nada. Let sleeping dogs lye, you want to start asking him of what he was doing how many yrs ago.
      Nigga mite start thinking uv gone crazy.
      I can remember when I started dating my husband, bcos I had suffered so much in my last rlstshp bcos of cheating. Anythn he said I suspected.
      If I called, he didn’t pick up d fone I assume he’s with a chick, even having sex sef.
      He put up smthn on bb or instagram, I feel he’s talking abt anoda woman.
      I call and he sounds funny, I feel maybe he’s near anoda chick.
      Dude started thinkn im crazy, had to retrace my steps. BE CAREFUL O

    • bimsee

      February 24, 2016 at 5:08 pm

      You had better forget stirring what is bygone. You are married with so many years of marital experience and YET you listen to some fictional assumption and degradation of man from a single lady and its the right time to broach what doesn’t exist. Dey there make some wrong assumptions wear clothe for you sogbo! Mtscheew

    • Tosin

      February 24, 2016 at 5:43 pm

      don’t think of it as a lie, think of it as a fairytale. please. IF he did it, he did it for you. 😀 well, sort of.
      long time ago, i used to really hate lies. now i know a bit better, some people lie for a good reason. they deserve love.

      i hope with these few points of ours, we’ve been able to confince you and not convuse you that you should enjoy your life, you no get problem.

  19. Hian

    February 24, 2016 at 1:44 pm

    Sister I might have been lied to….you may want to take it to the Lord in prayer. ..I cannot help you.

  20. iyke

    February 24, 2016 at 1:52 pm

    Hmmm …Lies men tell lol.
    Deception is rampant in Naija – isn’t it so concerning that sometimes we tell the biggest lies to those we love most?
    Funny thing is that though some lies produce interpersonal friction, others may actually serve as a kind of harmless social lubricant …lol.

    • whocares

      February 24, 2016 at 2:14 pm

      harmless social lubricant. looooool. I agree. I lie like a bandit and no not to get anything, beht the lies just come when I need them to naturally and fluidly. lol. A lady can be slightly calculating in her dealings as well. Even when I tell myself I will approach whatever I am doing with gentility and all this zen nonsense I have been adopting lately, somehow I find myself calculating my moves and possible responses and counter responses until I tell myself stoppit! .. e dey all our body jare, we just have to keep working towards being a better pulzon and pray not to jam one chance.
      @Bijoux- Shop e-hugs darlings.. heartbreaks no matter how small are a bitch! x

  21. Ithappenedtomerecently

    February 24, 2016 at 1:59 pm

    this happened to me two weeks ago.. “Gosh, I left my wallet”.. I couldn’t believe my ears.. I’d learnt long ago to always hold “vex money” everywhere anyway.. Won’t be caught stranded or embarrassed. There just won’t be a repeat..

  22. Anon

    February 24, 2016 at 2:06 pm

    Hehehee…Nigerian men can lie for the world….It is becoming terrible everyday…I pity the ones that have promiscuous partners…The worst is the ones that are married…They will tell you they are divorced or separated just like the fool I met in PH…I didn’t even doubt him, he looked religious and does church things and I’m sure his Pastor can vouch for the clown…Trusting that a guy is truthful to you when he is after your p*s*y is like trusting a hungry lion that it won’t eat you….Lieing is a trend for men which I dnt think would be outdated soonest….It’s worse with men in Lag, PH and Abuja…This days, I just nod ma head with a smile when I hear them rap their lies…I dnt ever let them know that they are lieing….I just smile and shake ma head…We have MARKETERS now not MEN cos the last time I checked, marketers are the ones that cook up things for you to patronise them but Naija men has taken up their field…Lies would be the only thing that can prevent Naija men from entering heaven.

  23. Nkem Ndem

    Nkem Ndem

    February 24, 2016 at 2:09 pm

    @I might have been lied to: I think you should just let it go, he loved you enough to come back, wait with you, and marry you..that is a HUGE plus. @Ithappennedtomerecently: Ah! “vex money” is very important, I tell you!

  24. JOEY

    February 24, 2016 at 2:42 pm

    Women lie more….men fall for what they see and ladies fall for what they hear, that’s y Men lie and women wear make-up s.

  25. Adaure Njoku

    February 24, 2016 at 2:49 pm

    Loooooool. Niceeeeee

  26. Sabifok

    February 24, 2016 at 3:07 pm

    I am a guy, but I wont lie (no pun intended), I found this article very funny.

    Listen, sometimes guys just tell ladies what they want to hear. The end game is to get into their girl’s panties, and some guys do take it a step too far. But chicks have been known to tell huge lies too, and the difference is – when women lie, you wont catch them. Men tell frivolous, on-the-spot lies, to either avoid friction, or to smooth their way in (pun intended).

    • kele

      February 24, 2016 at 5:33 pm

      Hey Sabifok

      It’s good to read your comment again.

  27. sha

    February 24, 2016 at 3:36 pm

    hmm…men lie, no lie, e no concern me. I lies very well too. very very well. everything about me is guarded too…so, when men lie, it doesn’t get to me. I just smile and be like….two can play. ah no get time to dey rlay lies for my head.

  28. Bamz

    February 24, 2016 at 3:51 pm

    OK! Couple of weeks ago, one Friday, I planned a spontaneous casual date with a female friend who I was starting to like. We chatted during working hours and so luckily for me she agreed to meet up after work. A short while after, I decided to play a test on her commitment towards our mutual interest for one another. Guess what happened?!?!….

    I said to her, “love, my ATM card has been blocked because I attempted to withdraw but failed on multiple attempts. Would you still like to meet up? Maybe settle for ice-cream or just a drink or 2?”

    She didn’t respond until an hr later saying, “ah OK. Sorry about that. Nah, let’s meet up another time” then I said, “are u sure? Not even for ice-cream?”. Her reply was, “lol, yea I already made other plans”. Mind you, she is always working. Also, she could be lying as well to protect herself from me.

    The point I’m trying to make is, I lied about my ATM bcos I was trying to protect myself from someone who would easily use my money and then move on to the next man. As I’ve been a victim of “Miss Candy” females who like to take take take, I always lie for a good reason. OK! Let’s say, playing a PRANK… Lol

    • Mz_danielz

      February 24, 2016 at 4:57 pm

      That your test is a silly one. The average self respecting female will feel insulted if you plan a date with her and come up with such a silly excuse. She’ll feel like she’s a beggar biko.

      From me to you, don’t try it again.

    • Bamz

      February 24, 2016 at 5:38 pm

      I will do what I need to do to not fall for the wrong type. Don’t take advantage of me.

    • whocares

      February 24, 2016 at 5:19 pm

      soooooooo you were protecting yourself from the cost of what dinner? You sat down, and thought to yourself “here is a story worth sharing in public because it makes me look like a smart man?” No, it does not, you sound like a feck boy. She would have easily used your money? All (2000? 3000? or how much) of it that you might have spent on dinner? I assume you liked the girl and would have enjoyed her company. If not, why did you ask her out? Why not just jejely carry your money to iya basira and eat as much ogufe as you can if you would resort to such infantile tests. Its not even as if she already asked you to buy anything or give her anything.
      All this test on top dinner. dinner! Ahh (I must not go out a lot because I have not heard this one before o) gods save me from feck boys.

    • Nkem Ndem

      Nkem Ndem

      February 24, 2016 at 5:48 pm

      LOL, you are too funny,i swear.

    • Ch

      February 25, 2016 at 7:56 am

      @Bamz, you think you are being smart but this test is actually very foolish. Was this supposed to be your first date with the gal? So let’s assume that your story about your ATM card was true, what I think a serious guy who is genuinely interested in a gal wld do is get the quid for the date, maybe from his friends just so he doesn’t disappoint the gal, and then, the story can come up in the conversation over dinner – “ohh, you wnt believe wat happened to me today, bla bla bla..” I wld find that more endearing cos that means u still went out of your way. Bt ofcos, saying all that yarns u jst did, I’ll do d same thing and dump ur ass, cos that automatically qualifies u as a scrub. Aw much u get sef dat u are bragging about? And all ur messages in defense of ur stupid action shows that the girl made the right decision. Na wa for some boys who think they are men sha…Mtshewww

    • Somtoo

      February 25, 2016 at 9:32 am

      Keep testing o. keep testing, you hear? You dont know the devil is testing you. Chase away good women cos you are protecting moneyy that if you die, na rat go chop am. Lol.

      I would think – ” if his atm got blocked, cant he reschedule? Why is he emphasizing he wants to buy icecream or drink? Did i tell him is” hungry” that is catching me? Why the emphasis on stuff he is willing to buy on the date? “” Best believe dude, i will cancel cos u sound so money conscious.

      Like bamz thinks all girls are hungry and like plenty food. How much is the rice and chicken sef biko? We might end up having a good time that food is not a priority. Abi mr man is food all you have to offer on a date? What happened to scintillating conversations and the hope of crazy chemistry that will have us flirting all night? and to crown it all, the possibility of a first kiss? The one you try to make count so both of you go home wishing you dragged the kiss longer…

      Bia Mr Bamz, mind yaself. Stop testing yaself

  29. sepex

    February 24, 2016 at 4:23 pm

    I find this article very interesting…. I’ve been quite lucky with men not until the last frog I kissed. I left my previous relationship bcz he was a mummy’s boy. so I decided to date some 1 older….He was about 15yrs older and I felt well, he knows wah he wants and all that coz we were friends before he starting prophesying love

    he kept on talking about going to see my parents how many kids blab blab he even insisted I got pregnant so we get married quickly (sm1 that has neva gone to see my parents o)…my dad’s bday came and I gave he his nos to call and wish hbd so they’ll be some familiarity. dude came up with one long story and I smiled.

    he’s own bday came up and I called this dude that day after ordering for gifts and planning a surprise party. oga didn’t pick his call till the following day, only for him to say he was tiling his new house and that kept hin busy. jesu

    I waited till I saw hin and then I did the needed. men always think they’re smart but they’ll be careless one way or the other…I snoop his phone
    lo and behold….. my oh my I saw things my eyes couldn’t believe it. chasing anything in skirt, ahhh my people I’m skinny and he said am his spec. and I saw really big girls and short and pimply all sizes infact, I figured out weda I prayed for him or not… he’s case needed special deliverance and am not his mother nor creator

    I’ve carried my heels and disappeared. no more communication, i figured out he isn’t just a Philander but his lies are endless…

  30. Sleeksavvy

    February 24, 2016 at 5:03 pm

    Not the fault of men. Women prefer men that lie to them. As in she will fall flat if I tell her that I have a Ferrari! Ladies over to you. I have a Ferrari, will you date me? See how they are queueing! lol

  31. flo

    February 24, 2016 at 5:23 pm

    in defence of the guy in your intro story, he may truly be there alone, probably the girl is an old friend or classmate he just met at the entrance and him being a gentle man walks with her for a bit. as for the packages it may be his, or for the so called unofficial girlfriend
    either way he couldnt have said “HEY AM HERE WITH SOMEONE”, because truly he isn’t.

  32. Bamz

    February 24, 2016 at 5:36 pm

    The fact that I did what I did, showed that she wasn’t really into me… So why settle for her? I was willing to spend.. Like I always do. So why couldn’t she say, it’s OK! You can pay for our next date?? Or least understand my card was actually blocked!!

    I’m not sorry for what I did bcos it had made me a better person. Dating is like gambling. The house almost always wins.

    What if we actually went on this date and my card wouldn’t work??

    • whocares

      February 24, 2016 at 6:15 pm

      I get that, but you should have waited until that actually happened.. You know when yoruba says nkan ti oju ban wa ni oju ma ri? If you set out with this mindset, you will most likely attract those types of people and if they are not, you would hurt your chances of getting with a great person with silly tricks. If your card did not work for real and she refused then you would know. Or if she asked you for Iphone 6 after one date then you would also know and get to stepping. And to think, you share a name with some dude I once had a “tendre” for. lol.

    • Honeycrown

      February 24, 2016 at 6:35 pm

      @Bamz, Haba that was immature! Hopefully you didn’t miss out on a good girl! There are nasty but smart girls that will pay on a first date just to get their foot in the door too so this your strategy no work abeg. Go back to the drawing board mister!

  33. lolochifire

    February 24, 2016 at 7:06 pm

    @Bams. Dt was ur first date, u messed up abeg. U were too quick to test her.
    D test should have come up later in d r/ship, after u guys must hv known each other better & u would hv shown how serious u are.

  34. Bamz

    February 24, 2016 at 7:56 pm

    I didn’t miss out on a good girl because as I later found out, she got back with her ex. In order words, I was just a distraction.

    The truth is guys, I find it very hard to trust a woman who isn’t even ready to leave the past behind. I’m a gentleman and I’ve been on few dates which I paid for…My expectations in a woman should be as much as what I’m willing to do for you.

    FYI… Even after she got back with her ex, we still speak on n off.. But just small talk

    • BabyDee

      February 24, 2016 at 8:59 pm

      Oh gosh…. please just stop talking already. The more you say the more you sound like a child. Just stop please, especially If you are no longer in your early 20’s. Just Stop!

    • Oga o

      February 24, 2016 at 9:45 pm

      Shut up already jor!! You messed up. Silly test for that matter. And she got back with her ex is your feel good point? Let this matter die already jare.

    • Yall are gold diggers

      February 25, 2016 at 4:52 pm

      There are girls like that i have done it for after spending on them severally but not ready to part with their cash.

      Immediately, they gave an excuse and cancelled it. Bamz, see no allow dem deceive you. You did the right thing.
      These silly hoes be looking for a fool who they can suck dry.
      No be a mugu/maga for anybody.

      All of them insulting you are hoes like the girl. You can see it is paining them
      That is how majority of them are
      No bother replying or sayig anything

  35. Na lie joor

    February 24, 2016 at 9:43 pm

    Good girl ke! Ur atm got spoilt she cudnt say ok lets just hang out…even if na bread and groudnut but at least we get 2 talk and i wud get 2 knw ur personality…so bcos my atm got spoilt. Date canceled. Man sh just needed som1 2 spend on her so she cud feel special. And this is d reasons ladies keep ending up broken hearted even wit all d feminist/men are bad rants! As long as u can ‘provide’ they dnt rili care abt ur personality until they get burnt and they blame all men again and cycle continues.

  36. Ibi

    February 24, 2016 at 10:42 pm

    And this is how people ruin healthy relationships. From the story ehn it could have been his sister thank goodness the author didn’t call her friend all this people that’ll do amebo n end up looking stupid when the friend doesn’t believe the tale or she’s like oh I’m aware and again what if he wanted to surprise your friend nawa oh .btw totally unrelated but damn “IYKE” u just got yourself a new crush nothing like a man who knows how to respect women

  37. kosby

    February 25, 2016 at 10:23 am

    I guess the ladies of nowadays want too many.I dated a lady who is about 30yrs and she nags all the time.I want to make my hair my friends are getting xmas gift,all u say is I care I care na care I won I started given her what she wants since I knew is my money she is advice for ladies is dont ask for too much.your man cannot pay all your bills be contented with little.if u r too flamboyant gud suitors wont come,you always find your self in the midst of scammers

  38. Tukay

    February 25, 2016 at 5:10 pm

    Soooo cliche! Can we please talk about something else???? I’d like to think Toke Makinwa has over flogged these kinda issues. How about having a positive outlook on life and for once writing something positive? I won’t be surprised if your stories or what inspired you to write this are all LIES too. I mean who can tell. God bless Nigeria.

  39. Dee Lamz

    February 26, 2016 at 11:21 am

    Good read, i had a good laugh with this one..

  40. chisom

    March 1, 2016 at 2:05 pm

    Hmmmmmm, very true! I had an experience once with a guy before I got married. “I will never lie to you” but later found out that most of the things he told me were lies. I never trusted him again and it was one o the reason we broke up.

  41. Jenny

    May 18, 2016 at 8:49 pm

    I was happy to come across this article. I have been wondering why Nigerian men feel the need to lie so much. I read an article that Nigerian men lie 80% of the time. Amazing and SCaRY vs 25% of American men.
    I have met a few men online. They claim to be white men. – I am a white woman. They are sweet, and attentive. Soon after- I learned they lied and that they are younger Nigerian men. but what was AMAZI Ng- is that they continued to lie to me when I could prove to them taht they were lying. I just was asking for the truth. Then they got mad at me because I didn’t trust them??? I mean really- am I stupid? My question is- what is really going on in Nigeria that would make these men lie sooooo much and think that it is ok? Believing in Gid as they do- I don’t think God would approve of that. I like black men- but nit liars!!!!! Is it just that they want monetary help? They want free passage to the US? Can someone help me u see stand this deception that is rampant???!
    Thank you!!!!’

  42. Georginia

    September 28, 2016 at 9:14 pm

    I so wish I read this page before I met my Nigerian guy….I was never before in a relationship with a black guy and when I met him it was all new experience for me. Charming, full of sweet words, a real gentleman. I fell for him almost instantly. After few weeks of passionate meetings and hot dates I started to notice some differences in what he was saying and what he was doing. Few times I caught him lying but he always came up with some clever excuse. His phone was always on silence and when he was checking through his messages he always made sure it was out of my sight. He has never introduced me to his friends or family. Kept giving me different stories why. He kept promising me lots of things but none of it ever happened. We were meeting whenever it suited him. I realized after a while the only thing he was interested was sex. The rest was just a cover up. I lost few months of my life crying and wondering what was wrong with me that he treated me in this way but now I know I was absolutely fine. He was the lying, double faced bastard.

  43. Violadagamba

    November 20, 2016 at 12:03 am

    I have a very bad experience with a Nigerian guy. It is a very long story. Im very tired and feel stupid because of this relation. Its not possible to generalize these for all Nigerian man but its fact that they really know how to talk,how to steel woman heart, how to make love and how to tell great lies. Stubborness was our one of the biggest problem specially when he was lying about something. Now these days Im trying to keep myself from him because I ve seen that he asked for my love,my money,my home and a job…when I say I cant do all he has asked, he starts to tell me that Im useless, Im wicked, selfcentered, thick hearted. I spent 7months with him and at the end of it I hate my self because he never felt happy or feel good about anything,always asking for more and more. I never trusted him beacuse he never gave this feeling to me. Its because I never felt safe and comfortable with him. He is very sweet and he has best smile that I have ever seen on a man face,it always melt me..but now I close my eyes not to see his smile because he still tries to call me, text messages but I dont pick and I dont responde him…I just can say to all women friend,before come closer becareful..if anything bothers,runaway.Im so sorry for my english If I had any mistake…with my best xxx

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