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BN Prose: T.O.J by Bimbylads



Below is another edition of BN Prose by the uber-talented blogger Bimbylads – ENJOY!
Previous Editions of BN Prose
BN Prose 1 – THE H
BN Prose 2 – MAMA

‘Una no get craze’ laughed Chidi as he replaced the phone in its cradle. His wife, Lola raised an eyebrow and smiled.

‘Who was that sweetie?’ she asked, with her beautiful face breaking into a stunning smile. It was the same smile that captured his heart last year when he met her at the gym. He had proposed within 6 months, and three weeks ago, had exchanged their vows in front of a small registry audience. If it was possible to love someone more than life itself, Chidi loved his wife. Every thing about her radiated beauty. He walked towards her and pulled her to her feet.

‘ a few of my old friends from way back- awon paddies’ he replied, nuzzling his face into her neck, and ravishing her subtle scent.

‘ha, hope they know you are now married?’ she teased, and he winked at her, loving the fact that she was so jealous over him. She rolled her eyes walked towards the kitchen to prepare dinner, while he grabbed his car keys.

‘I am off to meet them for a quick catch up…ill be back for 10- don’t miss me ‘said Chidi, as he planted a kiss on her forehead. ‘ I love you’.

He hated leaving her at home alone, but Kayode, one of his friends was in town for just one day, and He hadn’t seen Kay for ages. He reluctantly broke his embrace and shut the door behind him to begin the one hour drive to the Twilight Zone, the bar where his friends were awaiting his arrival.


‘ Chidisco- the newest husband in town!’ was the boisterous greeting that met him at the entrance to Twilight Zone. Chidi knew without a doubt that it was Femo’s voice. He turned to the direction of the voice and gasped with surprise. Kay, Femo, Nnamdi , and Dotun flanked one of the beer infiltrated tables.. Four of them were his close friends from childhood, and surprisingly, none of them had attended his wedding. Kay lived in the UK, while the rest had been away on year long business trips.

‘Femo d millionaire’ shrilled a clearly excited Chidi, as he returned his friends’ tight embrace. The others joined in a group hug, and before long, everyone was re-ordering beer and talking at once.

After 10 minutes of teasing and joking around, they finally fell silent and Chidi braced himself for the torrent of questions that was sure to follow.

Kay cleared his throat, and peered at Chidi through his glasses; a gesture that suggested that Kay wanted to be heard. ‘Chidisco, How you take do am? Why you marry? I mean- it’s a great thing, marriage, but you Chidi?!’ Chidi was not surprised at the question. Before he met his wife, he had been a notorious player. He had loved women, partying and drinking. He wanted to reply, but someone interrupted him.

‘–Allow Chidi, He looks like he is in heaven?’ said Femo, the richest of the lot. Femo was divorced, and had vowed never to remarry.

‘Nna, na Yoruba woman you marry?’ Nnamdi finally spoke, concern masking his shy frame. Nnamdi was the quietest of his friends, and by far the most sensible. They were both from the same Village, and in many ways, it made them closer than the others.. Nnamdi took life seriously and worked harder than he played. He also desperately wanted to get married.

‘Marriage Sha-not me o. There are no good women in the whole world, w’alai!’ added Dotun in his deep baritone voice. Dotun had scars from his last relationship. The woman had cleared his account and rendered him bankrupt.

Kay continued from where he left off; ‘Chidi, marriage is not a bag of chips you know. It’s even easier for you lot in Naija. For jand, you gas to think am well- if you mess up, the woman will clear your life savings’.

They all laughed at Kay’s facial expression. Chidi looked around the table, and pride warmed his heart. He loved his friends and had missed them terribly. His friends had begged him to postpone the wedding till they could attend, but Lola’s parents wouldn’t hear of it. Besides, they had asked him not to over publicise the wedding of their only daughter. And so, he had not really shared anything with his friends until now. As they all sat there, eager to hear his story, he couldn’t wait to tell them all, and possibly convict one of them to change their ways and settle down .

He turned to face Nnamdi. ‘na Yoruba woman. The most wonderful woman I have ever met in my life. The most amazing thing is, I wasn’t even looking. You see, I met her at the gym…’ he began and Femo awwwed loudly, making Chidi smile.

‘You guys remember I was working on that multi million pound bid at my firm’s HQ, Na so one day I go gym…’ He continued; but was stopped mid sentence.

‘—Sorry to interrupt you o, Chidisco, I just remembered one gist I wanted to give you guys’ said, Femo cutting into his conversation.

‘Did you guys hear about that babe that got married three weeks ago – wetin be her name now?’ Femo looked around the table and scratched his head. A pregnant pause followed as they all tried to jug their memory.

‘Not our T.O.J?’

‘It is our T.O.J o!! Chop knuckle Kay!! Imagine, that girl married some bloke in PH ni sha!’

Chidi had no idea of who “our T.O.J was”. So he asked anyway, despite his obvious lack of interest.

‘No vex, Chidi, I heard she met some guy and married him in Port Harcourt jare, that why I asked. T.O.J is that babe ‘we’ slept with a while back. The one that Jide passed to me. Meeeeeen, I carry yansh for the man that married her o!!’ Femo raised his fist in the air and they all laughed, including Chidi. He had heard about the girl, but he couldn’t recall ever meeting her.

Femo patted his back and grinned. ‘Totally irrelevant to your gist, please continue with how you met the Mrs’

Smiling in return, Chidi started to speak again, but someone interrupted him for the second time.

‘I’m not proud of it, but I also slept with her. Her husband must be very understanding…’ That was Nnmadi, the quiet one. Dotun laughed and shook his head.

‘Or under the influence of powerful jazz’ countered Femo.

‘Wait o, didn’t she serve in UCS with that mad woman I dated? That Same T.O.J? She married 3 weeks ago ke?? No way!! I slept with her too, like 2 years ago.. Foolish girl, she almost made me marry her by force o…’ Dotun looked very surprised. ‘See why I say I no go marry? If T.O.J can hook up a man, that means life don finish be dat’

Kay took a swig of beer and nodded his head, ‘Believe me, No one could have enjoyed her as much as I did. She came to Jand two years ago, she literally lived with me’. He laughed heartily,’ Omo, has anyone tasted her efo? Damn, the babe’s cooking is off the chain’

‘Infact, when I heard she got married ehn, I wanted to fly to Naija to flog her husband, is he blind? Abi e no hear her gist?’

Chidi smiled sadly. ‘Anyway, so I walked into the gym, and there on the treadmill was this stunning….’Chidi paused, irritated that Femo was still laughing and disturbing the flow of his story.

‘Femo, wetin do you now?’ Asked Kay, who was also eager to hear Chidi’s love tale

Femo raised both arms in the air and made a surrendering motion.

‘Ah! Titilola Olabisi Johnson married?! Anyone can marry ni yen. I can’t get over it, my guy no vex, continue your story’ He held his hand over his mouth to stifle his laughter.

Suddenly, everything stopped moving at that point. Chidi felt himself grow cold. His heart abruptly began to thump and blood rushed to his brain, making his head swirl.

‘ d-describe this T.O.J b-babe abeg’ he managed to blurt out. He hoped the beads of sweat on his forehead were not visible.

‘ ah, you no remember Titi Olabisi Johnson? From Madam Dinuba hall in Uni? Our Titi?? That used to speak one fake fune. Her middle name is Olabisi o; it’s not a posh compound surname. Remember when the razz girl asked everyone to start calling her T.O.J? she must have felt funky’ Dotun offered, stunned that Chidi had no recollection.

‘You know Chidi was in Med school, he probably didn’t know her that well…but then, Titi no dey get restriction. Med school o, business school o, accounting and finance nko? she dey there’ Femo added; and Dotun and Nnamdi collapsed in a heap of laugher.

‘Smallish, light skinned with massive hips- figure 8’ Nnamdi chuckled, as he used his fingers to draw the number 8 on the table. Chidi’s eyes followed Nnamdi’s hand movement as if he was in a trance.

‘Correct figure 8, with one dimple on her right cheek- the babe is fine sha, make we no lie’ added Dotun.

‘Dotun, commot, T.O.J’s dimple is on her left cheek- I know because she lived with me. She has one mad ass beauty spot by her thigh…you know I have a thing for beauty spots.’

‘By the way, Chidi why you wan know, you’ve only been married a few weeks, abi did you marry T.O.J by mistake?’ asked Kay, laughing hysterically at what he thought was a joke.

But it wasn’t. The woman his friends had just described was Lola. Titilola Olabisi Johnson was his wife. It had never crossed his mind. She had never called her self T.O.J., infact; she had said her middle name was Adunni…. That was what he’d seen on her birth certificate. She had lied about her past.

His wife and his friends? All his friends? All four of them? Her dimple…her figure… hell, the beauty spot on her thigh… they had all the intimate details he’d cherished.

The image forced bile to his gullet. Who else? How many more men?

The laughter had died down and everyone was staring at him bizarrely.

Anger, disgust and disbelief crashed on his features, as he grabbed his car keys and stormed out of the bar; to the shock friends. As he slammed his car door shut and screeched away, the last thing he heard was Femo’s fading voice telling him it was all a joke.
He wished it was.


He drove like a mad man until he got home. His mobile rang all through. It was Kay, and Femo. He ignored them all. The moment he let himself into the house, Lola rushed to him for a hug, but stopped dead in her tracks when she saw the wild expression on his face.

‘What’s wrong honey?’ she whispered; her voice ever so sweet and soft. He wanted to hug her and take it back to where they were before he’d left the house. But the horrible, grotesque imaginations of his wife with his four friends clouded his intelligence.

Lola suddenly looked like a pile of dung.

With all the force he could muster, he whispered the three letters that had haunted him since the moment he’d heard them-’ T.O.J’. And with heartbreaking pain, he watched as his wife stiffened instantly. She bit her lips so hard, that they poured blood.

As tears filled her large eyes, she reached for his face; wanting to touch him. But he pushed her away with so much force that she fell to the floor and began sobbing quietly. He tore his gaze away from her and ran into the bedroom.

Shutting the door on himself, he punched a hole in the wall and broke down into uncontrollable sobs…

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  1. Anonymous

    February 19, 2008 at 10:31 pm

    WoW!!!! I am soooo FIRST!!!

  2. Anonymous

    February 19, 2008 at 10:32 pm

    Where is everyone? Do I need to be some where? THIRD!!!

  3. Kpakpando

    February 19, 2008 at 10:33 pm

    They made you post by fire, by force I see, don’t mind ndi ala turning your comment to Tejuosho market like NR.

  4. ijeoma

    February 19, 2008 at 10:34 pm fifth…yeeeeeeee!!!!!

  5. Anonymous

    February 19, 2008 at 10:57 pm

    Bella! you’ve wisened up girl…good job lol
    And Bimby such an amazing piece…you had me holding my breath.

  6. Anonymous

    February 19, 2008 at 11:19 pm

    Your past doesn’t determine ur future. It’s a shame he’s friends have all slept with her but they’re married and must move on.Not shocking at all –

  7. tobi

    February 19, 2008 at 11:40 pm

    great job, bimbylads! i could tell where the story was headed but you still had me in suspense.

    keep writing!

  8. Anonymous

    February 19, 2008 at 11:41 pm

    He was a player and she was a playette…don’t see why they can’t forge ahead and make something out of there marriage regardless of the past!!!

  9. Anonymous

    February 19, 2008 at 11:54 pm

    great story Bimby!
    on the same topic, do you guye remember this aunty bella? miss new leaf -

    bella jo bring aunty bella back now

  10. Ladybrille

    February 20, 2008 at 12:00 am

    Bimby Lads, u don come again o! Ahn ahn! The Danielle Steele of Naija writing with such magical flow, as her fingers click away in a passionate staccato; building up a suspense so great as Chidi’s friend’s mock him and finally crashing when Chidi collapses on his bedroom floor, in a oh so soft “e don happen o” staccato.

    How did I do? Lol! U know I enjoy ur work. This was greeeeeeeeeeeeeat! You capture the complexity of humans and lace it up with great moral underpinningsin a very sensual yet exciting way! Very strong!

  11. Anonymous

    February 20, 2008 at 12:02 am

    lol its true o
    she was a player and he was a playette hahahah
    the friends bit is unfortunate, all of them? wow

  12. Anonymous

    February 20, 2008 at 12:03 am

    abi na the other way round sef… that is why they say karma is a bitch

  13. fan

    February 20, 2008 at 12:20 am

    You know Chidi was in Med school, he probably didn’t know her that well…but then, Titi no dey get restriction. Med school o, business school o, accounting and finance nko? she dey there’ Femo added; and Dotun and Nnamdi collapsed in a heap of laugher.


  14. Anonymous

    February 20, 2008 at 2:56 am

    And so? Thay are ALL sluts.So she has a past with all his friends, haba, all the time they courted he never talked about his friends to her? Anyway, this is what marrying within 2 minutes (6 months)gets you.

  15. Anonymous

    February 20, 2008 at 3:56 am

    Vote for CHIKEZIE EZE, American Idol.

  16. onydchic

    February 20, 2008 at 8:32 am

    Well… like the other person said, karma is a bitch, the guy played the field in his time, so did she… he should get over it.

  17. Naija Chickito

    February 20, 2008 at 10:40 am

    So sad. I’ve heard a similar true story but this time, the marriage hadn’t taken place yet, so the guy called it off.

    But many ‘runs babes’ never get caught. In fact, they even marry before the decent chicks, and to great guys too. But I believe we eventually reap what we sow, maybe not ‘where’ we so, but definitely ‘what’ we sow.

  18. Anonymous

    February 20, 2008 at 12:14 pm

    Inspired by usher and r.kelly’s song ‘same girl.’ Funny in parts, but very very predictable.

  19. Anonymous

    February 20, 2008 at 1:38 pm

    anonymous 10:19, did you say “not shocking at all” … you must be having a laugh. don’t know the world you’re living in.

    unfortunately girls …your past matters and will always matter.
    sad but true

  20. Nonesuch

    February 20, 2008 at 1:56 pm

    @Ladybrille my head is swelling from the ‘praise’ i wonder how bimby must feel.

    The Morale of the prose?…hhm you can run but you cant hide.

    Nice one.

  21. Anonymous

    February 20, 2008 at 2:00 pm

    Bimbylads tooooo MADDDDDD!!!!! as in you should really tap into this your gift oh.

  22. Unbiased

    February 20, 2008 at 3:38 pm

    Like Mary in the bible, i want to sit at the feet of Bimbylads make she dey tori go!!!!
    Good work dear. Good work!!

  23. Ifeomaadiagwuagwu

    February 20, 2008 at 3:53 pm

    I agree with Naija Chickito: “we reap what we sow.”

    Life always goes round in circles.

    Bimbylands did a wonderful job.

    More to her!

    Bella… babes, thanks for sharing.

  24. Anonymous

    February 20, 2008 at 4:19 pm

    OMG!!!! BIMBY UR AN AMAZING WRITER!!! keep up the good work!

  25. emma

    February 20, 2008 at 5:05 pm

    WOW…just WOW!!!

  26. Anonymous

    February 20, 2008 at 6:00 pm

    Its not true,

    your past doesn’t matter.

    I say this cause I used to be a TOJ myself, back in the day. But not acoountin, business med kind oo. More like preggy, divorce, sort of thing. Boy was i young, and very very foolish.

    Anyway, I gave my life to God at the age of 23, decided to leave that life behind. Asking for His forgiveness. It took me till I was 28 to finally forgive myself, and when I did, I finally met the GREATEST man in the world. I told him my journeys of long ago, of which He said, if God has forgiven you, and you have been celibate for all this while, then who am I to judge. I am now engaged to the married to the best man, and I am so so happy.

    Thank God.

    so dotun, nnamdi, femo, carry una story come, my husband no care. He sees me the way God sees me. I am finally free from my past mistakes. And can now look to my future.

  27. Bella Naija

    February 20, 2008 at 6:08 pm

    @anonymous – I am feeling your comment!
    Yes, people can change.
    May God bless your forthcoming marriage!

    Anyway, its a story.

    We dont know whether TOJ had changed or if she is going to be doing some runs behind Chidi’s back (also we dont know if Chidi would have done same)

    also the story concludes with Chidi crying soooooo after his tears finish, they might discuss it, pray and move on….
    but the guy might have to x off his friends sha…cause it will be very difficult to stay friends with them considering the past

  28. Anonymous

    February 20, 2008 at 6:09 pm

    It’s not easy for men to get over thier wife shagging thier friend even if it was in the past. something has to give. if he loves her, they’ll move on and he’ll have to fashi his friends either way, he has to lose one of the parties involved.

  29. Anonymous

    February 20, 2008 at 6:46 pm

    asewo ti gba ijoba

  30. Anonymous

    February 20, 2008 at 8:46 pm

    honestly…whats the big deal? so the girl has a past- as i am sure does he. we all come from somewhere and that should not determine where we go or how we should end up. I wish we could all take a look at the bigger picture. So what?? He loves her, she loves him. Does it matter that she slept with other ppl before they were together? Didnt he???

  31. shola pacheco

    February 20, 2008 at 9:35 pm

    bimbylads,huh great job,karma na bitch ho…… oh well ,he played,she played ,i hope they can move on…..

  32. Anyaposh

    February 21, 2008 at 1:17 am

    Ohmigoodness!!! Why the heck would she lie about her sexual past/sexcapades?!! That is always a NO-NO. Those many men & all connected. Eiyaah, poor girl. I hope they divorce.

  33. Anonymous

    February 21, 2008 at 1:41 am

    bimbyland u betta phone bobby

  34. Double Standard's a Bitch

    February 21, 2008 at 4:21 am

    I do not understand why she did not tell him the truth in the first place considering she lived a very active sexual life. but i also do not believe he has the right to be overly angry..

    i understand his anger but i do not understand him looking at her and seeing “a pile of dung” simply because he also had a very active sexual life and he was proud of it..

    being called a “big man” made him happy..but not when he hears something about the girl he is married to being a “big woman” i.e playerette he becomes vexed….

    He should try and put himself into the girls place if it was the other way around and her friends were all talking about a man they was fine, big, all his physical attributes and about the fact that they had all shagged him.

    What would he do…..

  35. Ms. Catwalq

    February 21, 2008 at 6:00 am

    I am not going to pretend that I did not expect his reaction. The double standards for women most likely will out live me.
    Am I the only one that thinks little of men who brag of having slept with a woman that everyone else has? i mean, they must not have a high opinion of themselves to seek out a woman they do not have to apply much effort to?…..

  36. femme fatale

    February 21, 2008 at 12:15 pm

    more! more! more!…very nice writing…ok 2 the story…hmmm!! def double standards, its really a shame that a guy and girl can do the same things and while one is glorified the other is villified(omo! i hope thts d write spelling o but if not hey),but i guess it’d be weird knowin all his friends had slept with his wife tho, she should have been honest about her past wit him…Ok maybe not 100% tho;-)

  37. Shubby doo

    February 21, 2008 at 2:24 pm

    ok i don’t care that i’m 39th…this is great. bella & bimbylads…thanks!

  38. bimbylads

    February 21, 2008 at 2:32 pm

    Lol.. thanks Bella for pasting this up. AS noted by most of you, this happens all the time. In an ideal world, Chidi has no right to feel disgusted that his wife had been around. But, we don’t live in an ideal world. In the true story, Chidi divorced his wife immediately afterwards. I couldn’t believe that a man would divorce his wife simply because of this. But he did. And I had to tell the story for all to hear( although I didn’t complete it).
    No matter what women think, It a man’s world. And even when men have slept around, they are praised for it. For some reason, women are not spared. It’s so unfair.
    But that’s life. What I do know is that, men who slander women like the friends I described did, have their own waiting in store for them.

  39. 'dara

    February 21, 2008 at 2:52 pm

    Great Job Bimby! Teaches us all a lesson. Keep up the good work.

  40. Bunmi

    February 21, 2008 at 4:03 pm

    Really i dont think her active sexual life was the issue.
    Its the fact that she slept with all the guys knowing that they were all friends.
    What dis means is that she doesnt have scruples. ala animashaun
    Remember the Baba Iyabo tingy

  41. 1stpet2v9

    February 21, 2008 at 4:08 pm

    SHETTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT!!!!! T.O.J messed up! kai!

    and dis is bimby’s work??? mehn… c talent!

  42. Toni Payne

    February 21, 2008 at 4:30 pm

    wow.. nice on.. chick should think about wriing novels def had me holding my breath


    February 21, 2008 at 4:46 pm

    as they say in yoruba, ashewo to re ile oko, holiday lo gba, i dont think the issue was her sleeping around? it was more sleeping with guys she knew were buddies and then not telling her husband about it before they got married. i know d true stroy and d husband di leave his wife afterwards but like someone said we dont live in an ideal world.

  44. Anonymous

    February 21, 2008 at 5:52 pm

    good job! this really teaches a serious life lesson…. wish i had seen this 5 years ago, but then again i would not have believed it. the most important thing though is for the girl to be truly repentant and forgive herself. we all make mistakes and it’s like naija men would not give us a chance to make it right and enjoy the rest of our lives.

  45. Orekelewa

    February 21, 2008 at 6:11 pm

    This just goes to show that life sucks (at times) and everything done in the dark always comes to the light….next time before getting married they will remember to ask about each other’s friends and past relationships….if she had asked these questions she would have realized she has slept with half of his friends….stupidity should not be classified as a mistake!!!

  46. Nwanyi Ocha

    February 21, 2008 at 8:49 pm

    another BimByLad production – loved it.

    Sad but it’s reality – it’s a long road but peeps need to seriosuly start changing the way they think!

  47. Anonymous

    February 21, 2008 at 9:15 pm

    Chidi has no one to blame but himself. If Chidi had married in Naija fashion, his wife’s past would have been revealed. For Igbo’s they do background checks and this is the norm for most groups in Naija. Chidi’s family and friends would have followed him to his wife’s house to formally ask for her hand in marriage. They would have asked questions about her background and that of her family. It seemed he skipped that process or modified it to a point that it did not help him in finding out facts about his wife. And what Yoruba parents actually want a hush hush wedding for their ONLY daughter and are so eager to dash their daughter to an Igbo man without some resistance. Sounds too easy. The lesson here is to marry in the “open” and not do an underground ceremony.

    I’m engaged to be married and I have done a formal criminal and civil background check. Additionally, will continue to make inquiries. My partner is aware of this and I have given permission for a background check to be done on me. I want to know what I am getting into. My wedding will be a society wedding. No hiding or corner-corner affair.

    Any person in Chidi’s position has two choices stay and deal with the facts that all his friends have screwed his wife or divorce and move on.

  48. darkerberry

    February 21, 2008 at 10:09 pm

    please…the guy didnt sleep with 3 of her friends!! haba! the way i see it..he could have stayed and let it haunt the marriage..or he could have left and let ehr find someone whose friends she hasnt slept with! life is a bitch..The writing was mad..the conversation and all!

  49. Anonymous

    February 21, 2008 at 10:18 pm

    actually now that i think about it. what a fool, why is he crying? maybe he has slept with all of her friends too

  50. Anonymous

    February 21, 2008 at 10:22 pm

    lollllllllllll but they gave us hints in teh story now…they did a quiet wedding, so even her parents knew! haha they didnt want all the men on the grooms train to stand up during the wedding ceremondy and say ‘i fucked her too’. life is a bitch men. kai

    but they should have done background check, what kind of parents does chidi have sef that did not follow tradition abi the babe was that fine?

  51. A to Z

    February 21, 2008 at 11:43 pm

    I like this story. Maybe I need to watch more Nollywood or something, this one that everyone was saying predictable, predictable; it wasn’t that predictable to me

  52. Godisalive

    February 22, 2008 at 12:46 am

  53. Mineexclusively

    February 22, 2008 at 1:40 am

    It is kinda simple. Sleep with friends, tell the friends and keep it open. Have threesome with the friends too sef.

    But don’t you ever marry one of them. Don’t ever. It will never work. Some things are left out of marriage.

  54. Shubby doo

    February 22, 2008 at 2:52 pm

    If this is a real story…it is very sad.

    This isn’t about it’s a man’s world or double standard…we are talking friends! All his close mates!!!!

    Heck, If I met up with my old firends and they were talking about some guy anyhow and taking the p*ss out of him’ then I find out it is my husband I cannot honestly say that I would be happy. Plus if my new husband had slept with all my friends and move in with one of them before I got married and they start talking about intimate details about his body is like this, how his does this, moves like that etc…my blood would boil.

    So he left her abi?! As women we would probably stay in the relationship. Men (not just naija men) don’t have that in them. They are weaker species when it comes to things like this. Sorry but it is true.

    Honesty is the key…others above are right…do your research…why should parents (Yoruba parents especially) want there only daughter to have a quiet wedding…I’m Yoruba and the only daughter….it’s not our way at all!

    Ladies keep away from friends, brothers, fathers, cousins etc…my golden rules. Sleep with whomever else you like and tell anybody and everybody to go to hell if the start talking rubbish! Shiooooooo…is it their business!

    However, if you have entered into the arms of a friend of his B4 (any of his friends my dearies…the close ones o! the not so close ones o!) and you really like him enough to want to develop the relationship into something more…tell him quick quick. Understand that you might have to give him up with the revelation. Don’t marry him and expect him to deal with it. Life in Naija is just not that simply!

  55. Anonymous

    February 23, 2008 at 3:49 am

    your past does not determine your future, thats true. If you consider your past to be just youthful lusts, by all means, please tell your husband that you did this and that and if he marries you after that …. shikena.
    But pls don’t hide it and expect him to be cool with him. I as a woman would be absolutely devastated if my guy had slept with all my female friends, even moved in with one without telling me, only for me to find out over some drinks.
    And get it, not all women who have had a sexual life b4 marriage get talked about like that over beer. She must really not have had any control at all ……
    The lesson here is that deceit never pays. Neither does a 6 mths engagement + quiet marriage + a background check unless you are absolutely sure that you will have no qualms at all with discovering that your wife used to be a stripper or that your husband used to work as a male prostitute ……

  56. chichi

    February 23, 2008 at 2:48 pm

    it is all so messed up as in really messed up!! it’s a pity sha, i guess ‘slepping dogs’ dont really lie… at least not 4 long!!

  57. ablckjamesbond

    February 25, 2008 at 3:23 pm

    This is the kind of situation no one prays to find themselves in. How do u move on after this…do u leave the woman you love or profess to love or do you try and work it out hoping she has truly changed.

    Difficult choices.

  58. ablackjamesbond

    February 25, 2008 at 4:39 pm

    What does one do after this?

    Where do u go from here?

  59. Anonymous

    February 28, 2008 at 12:50 am

    I don’t get it the moralof the story is

  60. Anonymous

    February 28, 2008 at 12:54 am

    Every girl who ever dated sm one other than her husband is guilty as far as busy bodies are concerned.
    I know a guy from Jos who married his blood brothers’ ex. At first every one talked its been almost ten years now and they are still together and no longer the center of attention.

  61. Anonymous

    February 29, 2008 at 5:15 pm

    abeg i say he leaves her slutty ass.
    cant women draw a line on who 2 sleep with. how can u sleep with a man and all his friends. u no shame.
    i am not being sexist. if a woman realises her man has been with all her friends then she has a right 2 b pissed as well.

  62. Anonymous

    March 2, 2008 at 4:31 pm

    nice work,
    i loved the easy flow of conversation between the guys, it was so real, so naija, so Lagos big boy type over cold beers on a friday night dissing women.
    Thats all it is really, double standards in this world, just like Lil Kim rapped in Christina Aguileras song..
    if a man sleeps around he is praised but if a babe does the same, then she’s a whore.
    its just what the world is, they expect women to be so virginal and saintly while they dog around…
    i was once passe around by a group of male friends..they planned it and executed it..all 3 of them..
    i had no idea cos they weren’t that cloase, they just knew each other…
    now i feel so dirty when i think about it..sometimes our naivety shoots us in the foot but really when we think about it, men sleep with women to exploit them, belittle them and use them and women should remain celibate till they get married, anything but remain celibate because it will come back to bite you, its just the rule of the game..any sin you commit is outside the body but one sin only you commit against your temple and that is fornication…
    i see celibacy more like “strength” a hidden strength that no one can take away from you..and once you open your legs as a woman, that strength is all respects and manners..the down sides are just too many…

    • bbola

      November 10, 2010 at 11:59 pm

      Omg . . .
      I don’t know what to say . . .
      I don’t even want those boys to reap where they have sown. I want God to punish them in a way he has never punished anyone before. Take heart luv!

  63. !!Estella!!

    March 7, 2008 at 4:53 pm


  64. ESI

    December 19, 2012 at 12:41 pm

    mehn! i hate what you did. how can u jux end the story like dat?

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