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Dunni Okuribido: 5 Friends Every Girl Should Have

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Life is hard enough with worries about Boko haram, ebola, getting promoted at work, or passing exams. Everyone needs friends to walk the journey of life with. Some are actually just friends for specific occasions (office buddy, lesson buddy, lunch buddy or giving a ride to work buddies), while others may blossom into family. Unfortunately it’s almost impossible to find one friend that meets all your friendship needs.

Here’s my own list of the 5 most important friends a girl needs:

The Hangout Buddie
If you’re a socialite like me (in my mind) or just the fun type who loves going out then this is likely to be your number one bestie. She’s the Robin to your Batman. You guys attend all the social gatherings together including weddings where you’re the groom’s sisters’ friends. She’s the one you call up to accompany you on a date with the new man you have no interest in dating but wish to spend his money. She’s the one who goes on a 5-hour road trip with you to attend your brother’s wedding. She may even double as your makeup artist and stylist – even better if she’s good at it. You get to attend all the events looking like a million bucks. You never have to miss a social event because you have no one to go with.

The Confidante
This is your go-to girl when you just need someone to whine about your problems to. She may not always have the solutions but she’s a tried and trusted listener with whom your secrets are safe. She is easy to talk to and does not judge or reprimand you for making poor relationship decisions. She tells you how hard marriage is and makes you feel lucky to be single. She’s the first person you tell when you find out your man is cheating or you’ve missed your period.

The Big Sister
She’s not necessarily more advanced in years than you. However she’s the matured one who seems to know everything – much of which she has learned from her 7 older brothers. She knows every trick in the boyfriend playbook and her predictions almost always come to pass. She doles out unsolicited advice but doesn’t force you to take it. She is friends with your mum and knows your entire family tree with names. She’s probably been a roommate at some point. She knows you better than anyone else and can tell when you’re attempting to conceal something. She sets you straight when you’re falling off the mark and the greatest part is she doesn’t rub it in your face.

The Critic
Now this is one friend you often feel is nagging you. She’s the blunt truth speaker who is not afraid to tell you the latest hairstyle you just spent 15k on doesn’t suit you. She constantly interrupts your gloating about how sweet, loving and generous the newly found le boo is with a reminder that it’s only just the honeymoon phase. Yea, she probably seems like a pessimistic critic but hey you know what they say “hope for the best but expect the worst”. She prepares you for the worst. And the great thing is it’s not just you she criticizes o…. she is critical of every service provider which usually leads to better service and products at an economical price. She’s the ultimate shopping buddy, she can price for Africa!!

The Gist Lover
This sister loves gist! She wants to know every intricate detail about everyone in your circle. Who’s dating who, who got engaged, who broke up with who, who landed an oil company job, whose asoebi is 25k…… etc. There’s never a dull moment with her around. Now you might think she’s not so vital…. But just as much as she loves hearing the gist so also does she give the gist. She knows everyone’s le boo and everyone’s ex. In fact you’re most likely to find out from her that your awesome le boo is also Tope’s fiancé. But hey, it’s only gist.

Often enough a friend might be two in one. Lucky for you, (less bridal showers to donate towards).

The bottom line is friends are really important and no matter how many times you get stabbed in the back by frenemies, don’t ever take the good friends you have for granted.

Blue bunny ice cream & chocolate chip cupcakes…. (because, I have a sweet tooth)

Photo Credit: Dreamstime |Karen Struthers

81 Comments

  1. og's beauty box

    September 5, 2014 at 4:44 pm

    Lol.love it..Need all these type of friends in my life,think I have some down thou.send in ur applications now.

    • Ifeoma Imoh

      September 7, 2014 at 1:27 pm

      My bestie has all these 5 qualities in her. So i don’t need 5 friends.

  2. Thatafricanchic

    September 5, 2014 at 4:45 pm

    They all sound like the same to me!

  3. bruno

    September 5, 2014 at 4:48 pm

    Every girl needs a G.B.F- gay best friend.

    • Bruness

      September 5, 2014 at 5:53 pm

      B**ch Please!!! Uv been watching too many mini series..#mtchew#

    • Ololajulo

      September 5, 2014 at 8:32 pm

      Brines to Brune? Rotfl

    • Moi

      September 5, 2014 at 5:55 pm

      Oh Bruno…you never cease to amaze me. I’d ask you to be my gay best friend but we’ll fall out soon enough…I’m a hopeful optimist who loves Pastor Chris and many other Nig Pastors.

  4. Ayoka

    September 5, 2014 at 4:52 pm

    I have just 2 friends who fit into this role……….Confidante, Big Sister, Gist Lover..God bless you wherever you are. I feel safe with these 2 people.
    Sha.. & Bus…

  5. Nneka

    September 5, 2014 at 4:53 pm

    Seriously i need friends. I miss my school days were i get to hang out with friends. Now it’s just work and home and church and back to work. *sob* *sob*

    • Insatiable Mrs. Grey,Eva&Ava(FSOG,Crossfire series&This Man trilogy)

      September 5, 2014 at 5:24 pm

      Please be my friend as we share the same routine……my own spare up time is reading Novels…..lots(I finish 577pages of FSOG in a week) I seriously would need a supplement to sidetrack me from my boring life to a gregarious one.

    • Doxa

      September 5, 2014 at 10:34 pm

      I need friends too, and we have the exact same routine. Let’s be friends joor.

    • Owelle

      September 6, 2014 at 4:34 pm

      We should be friends

    • yours truly

      September 6, 2014 at 8:32 pm

      Same here! I feel like you’ve just defined me. Abeg BN, is there anyway we can start a little “friends hook up” of our own? Something like a dating site. Hold on, that sounds like a genius (business) idea……… Investors are welcome

    • nkem

      September 7, 2014 at 4:46 pm

      u didnt add market

    • introverted humanist

      September 7, 2014 at 8:57 pm

      lol.. My social life = 0…. Can we be friends? 🙂

  6. sandra

    September 5, 2014 at 4:55 pm

    Yeah right! I’ve got a friend that is all rolled in one..

  7. sum1special

    September 5, 2014 at 5:02 pm

    My two BFFs are found in all of those descriptions. One is my hangout buddy, confidante and gist lover. The other one is my critic and big sister, partially confidante especially when the issue is some serious shit.lol

  8. Mary

    September 5, 2014 at 5:03 pm

    Beautiful article keep it up

  9. Evensef

    September 5, 2014 at 5:04 pm

    lol @ ‘She’s the first person you tell when you find out your man is cheating or you’ve missed your period’

  10. baboushka

    September 5, 2014 at 5:06 pm

    I just showed this article to my silly friend who goes to say “see that is why I always say you need more than one man in your life same reasons” lol I can’t with her I just can’t lol

  11. Ibinabo

    September 5, 2014 at 5:10 pm

    After school, a lot changes. now, life is a routine… I want my friends back!! but we’re all in different states now. what do i do?!

  12. Alma

    September 5, 2014 at 5:12 pm

    Dunni. Yayyyyy!

  13. Emmanuella

    September 5, 2014 at 5:17 pm

    My Childhood friend seems to be that kind of friend… ‘all encompassing”… She’s majorly the critic though!!

  14. oge

    September 5, 2014 at 5:21 pm

    lol|

  15. Berry Dakara

    September 5, 2014 at 5:52 pm

    I enjoyed this for the most part, save for this line… She’s the one you call up to accompany you on a date with the new man you have no interest in dating but wish to spend his money. 

    It doesn’t reflect well on the writer.

    • No wonder

      September 5, 2014 at 6:17 pm

      Thanks you. I was shocked when I read that line. Do girls still do that? Later you guys will be saying woman power and equality. How can you be equal when you just want to chop his money. This writer is very cruel and have an evil mind. Spending someone’s money when you you don’t have any intention of being fiends or date the person. So selfish. If you have this idea, my dear change. And if you are invited on a date and bring along a friend, grow up!

    • lol

      September 5, 2014 at 11:40 pm

      calm down. very cruel with an evil mind? isnt that too harsh? fyi, some girls still do that. doesnt make it right but it happens, lets not pretend.

    • Anjie

      September 6, 2014 at 10:09 am

      It’s never that deep, boo.

    • amie

      September 6, 2014 at 6:45 pm

      Na wa o… Dat was very harsh na. Its a free world u know, its her way of xpressing herself. BTW, me and my friends still do it and its FUN especially for students 🙂

    • divadivine

      September 5, 2014 at 6:40 pm

      I totally agree!

    • cos I say so

      September 5, 2014 at 6:44 pm

      Aunty Berry Abeg stop forming
      That’s just the plain truth,there are men who are just there to take you to the movies or to go to a concert
      Those are toasters that’ll never go beyond 1st base
      She’s being real

    • Oh Well!

      September 5, 2014 at 7:29 pm

      Considering the fact that there are men who only want to chop your @#$%& and leave you high and dry. I had one “friend” whose only role was to chauffeur me to eat jeviniks, calabar kitchen, catfish peppersoup and asun. Sometimes I paid, most times he paid. He had a car, I didn’t. He didn’t mince words about wanting to do the 2 humped camel. He didn’t realize his ambitions. I dropped him like a hot potato once the hands began to stray down my derriere during the side hugs. Sometimes a girl has got to do what a girl has got to do.

    • Bruness

      September 5, 2014 at 7:46 pm

      Berry I’d have 2 agree with #cos I say so#, there are guys that are there to just take you out and all of that just like there are girls guys don’t take seriously#GET REAL#

    • Omeha

      September 5, 2014 at 8:52 pm

      Couldn’t agree more. That line is just wrong on so many levels!

    • Berry Dakara

      September 5, 2014 at 9:01 pm

      @Cos I’m not forming. I have never done anything like that and my core group of friends haven’t either. It’s one thing if a girl says she brought her friend to act like a buffer IN CASE the date didn’t go well. But to bring your friend because you want to spend a man’s money? Yeeeeah, it ain’t never been that serious.

      But different strokes I guess.

  16. onlymewaka

    September 5, 2014 at 6:02 pm

    I ve been 2 of these to friends,but most of the time I get betrayed. But I still have friends that can be relied on, need [email protected] number one.

  17. gene

    September 5, 2014 at 6:06 pm

    ♍y friends are….well I have no friends:(

    • aj

      September 6, 2014 at 10:34 pm

      awwww me too. I dont gat no friends. Lets be friends.

  18. Raindrops

    September 5, 2014 at 6:19 pm

    Out of curiosity is this the same Dunni who attended MAryland convent private school?

  19. ehizino

    September 5, 2014 at 6:33 pm

    T

  20. frankliet

    September 5, 2014 at 7:30 pm

    Hahahahaha, love, love this article.

  21. beautifulonyinye

    September 5, 2014 at 7:39 pm

    Nice piece.I have all these qualities in my friends.As I read,I was just putting names beside each decription.I happen to be ‘the big sister and confidante’ to most of my friends cos I’m loyal and have never and will never divulge any of their secrets.

  22. Joan85

    September 5, 2014 at 7:41 pm

    *sigh* I used to have these types of friends o…until they got married lol. Priorities have changed, babies have arrived, life has moved on *sigh* #NewFriendsNeeded lol

  23. Ogeh

    September 5, 2014 at 8:04 pm

    I really enjoyed ur article………..every lady should have these friends; nice piece!!!

  24. AVID BLOG READER

    September 5, 2014 at 8:46 pm

    I have all of these except hand out buddy in my Mum. I am so thankful for her. I have learned the hard way that there are very few people who can make really good friends. I confide in no one but my mum!

  25. papermoon

    September 5, 2014 at 8:47 pm

    its ok if u dont hav friends in all these categories. some of us dont hav all of them cos we dont need aaallllll of them. a lot of the time its a waste of time.

  26. stanley

    September 5, 2014 at 9:01 pm

    Nice write up Dumni. Welldone. In Bida u happen tto be more of an hangout buddie

  27. ify

    September 5, 2014 at 9:14 pm

    ifeomaadoh.blogspot.com/2014/09/tgif.html?spref=tw

  28. Tolani

    September 5, 2014 at 9:32 pm

    Berry Dakara, Nija Girl have several seats!

    Mrs. Hoity Toity Berry; “It doesn’t reflect well on the writer”. Who died and made you judge? Do you know the writer and what she wants? Come to think of it, DO YOU HAVE ANYTHING ELSE TO DO OTHER THAN COMMENT ON ÅLMOST EVERY ARTICLE ON BELLANAIJA? Get a life.

    Nija Girl it isn’t that serious. If you read you will see she says she is honing her writing career. Critique her work instead, if you can.

    Bye.

    • Fashionista

      September 6, 2014 at 2:27 am

      And you, reading all the many comments she’s left on Bellanaija, you self get a life. Rude much!

    • Carliforniabawlar

      September 6, 2014 at 3:40 am

      Ahn Ahn sweetheart, have you also not gone out of your way to personally attack Berry? Same thing you accuse her off. Plus you that you’re reading all her BN comments (which are not as much as you make them sound, but what do I know), do you not have anything better to do as well?? Cool down for Jesus my dear… lol.

    • ebun

      September 6, 2014 at 12:17 pm

      rotfl

    • Just me

      September 8, 2014 at 6:41 pm

      I guess you might just have one deep seated personal hatred for her that the venom on your comment speaks so much volume. So whats wrong in critiquing an article. Na wao

  29. Facts

    September 5, 2014 at 11:02 pm

    My friend happens to be 5 in 1,, bt now she is married!!

  30. e-bukun

    September 6, 2014 at 2:16 am

    Yaaay. I used to have a mix of guys and girlfriends, but I’m in a phase where I’m enjoying my female friendships even more. As you get older and everyone moves on to more committed relationships, or become busy with work and the happenings of life you really start to appreciate things like gisting or just hanging around cooking or painting your nails.

  31. babygiwa

    September 6, 2014 at 7:29 am

    I agree with Berry big time! Dear writer, not all girls are like that, yes and I mean it. I don’t have all these kind of frnds (who needs all anyway?!) but I have really good friend, sisters and my confidante, my mom. And God, yes o I have God. I found out that when I’m doing anything big God is the first I should tell becus there are very few people who want you to have better lives than them, if any sef.

  32. babygiwa

    September 6, 2014 at 7:39 am

    *i have really good friends

  33. Audrey

    September 6, 2014 at 12:10 pm

    Interesting article but dear writer le boo means the boo,and so writing “everyone’s le boo” makes it incorrect.

  34. ebun

    September 6, 2014 at 12:18 pm

    some comments got me rolling on d floor… lool. i need some of u as my friends oo

  35. chris

    September 6, 2014 at 1:09 pm

    my frnds are adorable back in sec.skul dayz, i almost had all the type mentiond but now their selected….

    Holy-writ my life

  36. zinny

    September 6, 2014 at 1:22 pm

    i wish i can get a confident and reliable friends.

  37. xo

    September 6, 2014 at 1:58 pm

    I have friends who fit this descriptions..but then marriage happened for them..priorities changed..That’s life really…But I think its important to always have friends who are at the same stage in life as you are….so now I am looking for single women who are in the same phase as I am and facing the same challenges….thinking of setting up a bbm group of the sort for single girls…anyone interested?

    • Ivy

      September 8, 2014 at 11:45 am

      Very interested biko….Friends in Lagos o!

    • Alice

      September 8, 2014 at 11:52 am

      i am interested ooooooo….

  38. stephanie

    September 6, 2014 at 4:44 pm

    I need people wt qualities like this in my life,my friends have all moved on to different states….xo yes I’m interested,I need new friends guys,my email.,[email protected]

    • stephanie

      September 6, 2014 at 6:15 pm

    • Miss T

      September 8, 2014 at 12:36 pm

      I’m interested too

  39. Modella

    September 7, 2014 at 8:10 am

    Interesting article

  40. zeeboo

    September 7, 2014 at 10:42 am

    For now I can safely say I have friends that fit into all the criteria….but we’re all still very young and in school so I fear I’ll loose most of them with time…..I also think its best to live your lives without so many friends,life is just simpler and better that way.

  41. lollly

    September 8, 2014 at 10:46 am

    my 5 in 1 friend “Ny” ! hehehehehe.

  42. zaraflychic

    September 8, 2014 at 12:35 pm

    Ok then since all of us…………Zaraflychic, og’s beauty box, Doxa, Nneka, Insatiable Mrs. Grey,Eva&Ava and Owelle….share same routine, maybe we could just be friends and see how we’ll get our social life back. Let’s get started, my name is Zara, send me a mail [email protected] ………….. NB #NOHOMO#

    • nonygold

      September 10, 2014 at 11:21 am

      thats the same problem am having now. need new single friends like kilode. especially no1 type of fr.
      am nonygold. email: [email protected]

  43. Anna

    September 8, 2014 at 1:25 pm

    Oh don’t miss me out!! I’m in the U.K though.. booooo

  44. zaraflychic

    September 8, 2014 at 1:51 pm

    its fine Anna….we can still be connected, by visits anytime and social media… soooo you are welcome!xxx

  45. Ann

    September 8, 2014 at 9:16 pm

    Adunsco!! am proud of u. My Oniovome, hugsss

  46. Temmy tee

    September 9, 2014 at 2:31 pm

    Wish i had friends who had all these qualities,i just never seem to have the right set of friends.the few i have,it just seems like they are withdrawing from me or maybe its vice-versa.my social life is @level zero, i just need some friends…my e-mail add is anu.banjo(at)yahoo.com,also waiting patiently for the bbm group thingy.

  47. sexysean

    September 18, 2014 at 5:06 pm

    hmmmmmmm i used to have a frnds that has all the qualities but i never knew i was closed to devil…..she was beefing while i was being plain with her,i opened up everything about me.but now i dont fink i need frnds.

  48. makeupbyrey

    September 22, 2014 at 12:34 pm

    I have doubl friends in d categories #nonewfriends

  49. moyo

    September 25, 2014 at 9:55 pm

    Dunmi, your ideas are fresh and quite gripping.. a fun read.. wonder which of your gang of friends is each of these characters..lol

  50. Ola

    November 6, 2014 at 11:20 pm

    What is lyf without purpose, girlship I think, is not parasitism or commensalism, it a lyf. it is not bad to come from a disadvantaged background, but making decision DT suggest its influence only tells weda u ready for a change or not…. Ladies are machines not a. tool, that is, they are suppose to produce, rather than being used. In my opinion, courtesy demands a man takes u out. That in itself does not constitute a law. Why abuse it by “chopping his money”. Change is never teleported into, it is walked into. Be the lady u want ur childeren to be. The the lady u wanna be.

  51. suwa

    November 7, 2014 at 1:43 am

    Nice article.

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