Chiugo Akaolisa: Spiritual Background Check

Only a few weeks back, my aunt decided to confront me about the reason why I wasn’t yet married. She couldn’t, for the life of her, figure out why I didn’t want to just “pick one” (her words). She complained about how this generation had too much time on their hands trying to get things just right before they committed to someone.

So naturally, she took matters into her hands. She asked me to give her a list of all the men interested to me so that she can run a “spiritual background check” which should help me in my selection process. Of course I had to humor her even though I am Catholic. I wrote down a few names and gave it to her and after a few days of midnight prayers and fasting, her pastor had a name from the Holy Spirit and asked to see me. After meeting with her and listening to her version of the infamous “missing-rib” creation story, she finally revealed “the one”.

This would have worked out perfectly if the name she gave me wasn’t the one I put in for jokes; a very non-existent man. That was when I knew I had to write about it.

In my opinion, the “missing rib” version of the creation story has got some people all shades of confused. God, realizing that Adam needed a helper, took a rib from his side and made Eve. Only then did he ask them to go ahead and populate the earth. Only Adam had the privilege of a custom bride (being the first man and all) the rest of us just need to search from the diverse gene pool and pray for direction in finding a compatible match. If you don’t agree with me, then we should only have men in existence.Once he gets lonely, a woman would be made from his side for him.

I mean, if one man was made for one woman, then I really feel bad for those people whose potential partners have left them and gone back to God without any introduction. There is no way they are getting married now. That must suck!

I know of relatives and acquaintances that left GOOD partners they were committed to, following the advice of their pastors, and ended up without a replacement. Only a few I’ve heard of didn’t listen and are living in regret.

I am not trying to making this piece too skewed in other not to confuse the ones who do not share the same faith but I can confirm that God wants us to pray about everything, seek his guidance and commit everything into His hands directly . The Spiritual Leaders are there to help us find our path when we drift, advise, and aid us in prayers; not to weigh in on the most intimate aspects of our life. I gain nothing by undermining the works of Men and Women of God but they are human beings, prone to the same mistakes we are. Only a select few in this world have been given the gift of prophecy. The rest are just playing solid guess work.

You really do not need a man/woman of God to give insight on a partner who is verbally, physically or mentally abusive. Deep within your heart, you know whether a person is good for you or not. If there are character flaws you don’t like, it may never get better. Conversely, if he/she is genuinely good to you, holds you in high esteem, and ticks all your boxes, do you really need a spiritual background check?

I read once that “there is no point in looking for deep spiritual revelations where common sense is required”.

I opt for praying for yourself and only asking for help when you cannot do it on your own. If we can constantly commit everything to God from the beginning, He will always look out for us and direct us in all things.

Goodluck!

Photo Credit: Dreamstime | Ron Chapple