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Udochukwu Ikwuagwu: Get Your Naked Bodies Out of Banky W’s Bed!

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Banky finalBanky W has had it to his neck. The EME boss has always been known for his cool, calm demeanour till an uncouth, disrespectful fan tried that patience perhaps for attention and a few retweets and LOLs here and there. Drama started when a nosy fan tweeted: “I overheard you that u can’t marry a normal person, a girl from poor or low background; if you truly said that, u are a big fool (sic)!!!”

Of recent, Banky W has become a laughing stock, an object of scorn, for people to mock, and have a good day; all because the accomplished singer and label executive has decided to remain unmarried and relish bachelorhood.

Hardly a day goes by without an impolite fan making snide remarks, passing mean comments and offering unsolicited advice on Banky W’s Twitter or Instagram. Like prying neighbours who start a conversation with you after seeing off your female visitors, Nigerians have adopted that bad behaviour turning the R&B star’s accounts to a camp for gossip and market for trading nasty jabs thereby making his life hell.

Why are Nigerians hell-bent on becoming agents of torture to Banky W’s online and offline existence? Can’t a 35-year-old successful man be left to choose when/if to marry or not? Why must we police his relationship, sex life, or marital status?

Banky W is known to ignore such rudeness, but, on this occasion, he had had it—to the point of lashing out at the uncultured, and wasn’t ready to give legroom to such of his kind: I didn’t…but you’re a bigger fool for jumping to conclusions, believing everything u hear & tweeting me this crap (sic)!

If a Nigerian cinematographer were to reshoot the infamous Famous video for local audience, Bankole Wellington aka Banky W would have his butt naked figure on frame for viewing pleasure. We have become obsessed with Banky W’s love and sex life that soon enough a stalker alert will be a pastime. Nigerians swear voyeurism isn’t a sexual fetish- as it isn’t in our culture- we engage in, but seeing how Banky W has been stripped naked and tied to the bedpost while we watch and ask questions “When will you marry”, “Why are you single”, “Who is you ideal woman”, “Are you dating [name random celebrity]”; we definitely love to get between Banky W’s sheets, giggling and making funny comments about his body. Why else do you think fans and media keep troubling the singer who famously sang “I’m Banky W, don’t mean to trouble you” about his sex life and marital status? Why have we turned this celebrity’s life into a reality show where we stalk his every moment- including those entirely for artistic satisfaction?

Type Banky W on your search bar, and Google search suggestions pop up with: “Banky W dating Tiwa Savage”, “Banky W dating Wizkid’s sister”, “Banky W dating Kate Henshaw”, “Banky W dating Toolz”, etc. It doesn’t get any more disturbing than the presence of a chronological list of (possible) women dated. He has been romantically linked to so many women in and outside the Nigerian entertainment industry from the above names to actress Adesua Otomi to former beauty queen Omowunmi Akinnifesi to singer Chidinma to actress Damilola Adegbite to dancehall godmother Cynthia Morgan to label mate Niyola to married vocalist Nikki Laoye to Ghanaian-Italian model Andrea Giaccaglia, even an innocent-looking Dubai dolphin (was it not said that he was caught kissing a dolphin).

Looking at all the celebrity names, every woman Banky W makes music or photographed with, unfortunately, ends up his lover—even when it’s obvious it’s a promo photo for a music collaboration, or random pictures of celebrities at an event, or when the female celebrity is married or engaged. Not only are these assumptions and theories ridiculous, but annoying—to say the least! Some theorists even go as far as questioning the EME boss’ sexuality, insinuating his gay self is yet to come out of the closet—all these because one man decides to remain single. So, a photo taken of Banky W and Cynthia Morgan from an awkward camera angle ends with stories of Banky W caught kissing. Another photo with Omowunmi Akinnifesi of a peck goes viral about a new girlfriend. Promo pictures and videos of Niyola and Nikki Laoye for Last Bus Stop (and Love to Love You) and Onyeuwaoma respectively turn to him dating the two women, even ignoring the obvious fact that the latter is married. Kissing Adesua Otomi on set for Made for You and Kemi Adetiba-directed flick, The Wedding Party, were signs he was walking down the aisle soon.

Back in 2013, Banky W had to clarify his relationship with model Andrea Giaccaglia after the world had made her his ‘new’ girl: “That’s news to me. Nothing happened. She’s a fantastic person who happens to be a friend. I think people shouldn’t be so obsessed about my relationship status; I’ll get married when the time is right and the lady is right. When these two things are in order I’ll marry. At the moment, I am 100% single.”

Weeks before lashing out at the bad-mannered fan, Banky W, who had earlier posted a picture cuddling his puppy and had received mean instagram comments, tweeted out of frustration about fans badgering with questions on his marital status: “These days, even if I post “Good morning”, someone will say “Ok, but it will be a better morning WHEN YOU MARRY.”

Banky W has been crowned the ‘Most Eligible Bachelor in Nigeria’, and this uncanvassed position has made even celebrating his friends on their weddings as groomsman a daunting task, with millions wearing the cloak of concerned citizens aka Association of Twitter and Instagram Family Friends not minding their business and refusing to let him live his life.

“Why is this guy eternally single or is it a strategy to keep ladies interested?”
“I don taya for Banky W sef!”

Banky W can’t be groomsman for Tunji ‘Tee Billz’ Balogun, Tunde Demuren, Ebuka Obi-Uchendu, Olamide Adedeji, Noble Igwe in peace without some fellow Nigerian turning his account to a platform to address the unmarried and “eternally single”. On Ebuka Obi-Uchendu’s wedding, he posted: “Yes, I’m on groomsman duty again. Yes, I’m the last man standing cuz (sic) all my friends are marrying. No, I don’t know when I’m getting married. God will do my own in time.”

Can we all get out of Banky W’s bed and let the talented vocalist live? Is it too much to ask Nigerians to take their busybodies off a grown man’s sheets, and out of his love and private life? Would we be sick if we don’t keep our noses out of a grown man’s business, and eyes from peeping through his key hole? Marriage isn’t by force! And the man, Bankole Wellington, if/when he does get a bride won’t change the fact that he has achieved so much in his career and a wedding ring won’t define him.

Udochukwu is a pop culture enthusiast, music critic and occasional writer. He has been published in both literary and contemporary blogs including NAIJ.com, olisa.tv, thesheet.ng, Brittle Paper, African Writer, Sankofa Mag, TNC, Music Eyz (UK), and elsewhere.

24 Comments

  1. truth

    August 15, 2016 at 7:42 pm

    for your info banky did date andrea, and that is fact. Anybody else i dont know, but andrea is the only woman on that list i know personally about . But people should let him be,when he wants to show the world who he is with, you guys will know, so just be patient and focus on your own lives. When you are a fan of someone, you are a fan to what made them famous, aka their art, so be a fan of the art and let him live his personal live personally.

    • Miss leavebankyalone

      August 15, 2016 at 8:32 pm

      just fking and “dating” are completely two different things
      i dont know why yalll keep mixing it up 🙂
      There is a lot of JFs out there
      with Chris Attoh yes maybe u can call that as they dated for more than a year or two – but with Banky – NO, it was JF
      kinda like JD and JD – northern affair 🙂

    • kandy

      August 16, 2016 at 1:28 am

      Banky W is still dating Andrea tho…

  2. Mo81

    August 15, 2016 at 7:46 pm

    This article has me confused, is this a subtle shade? Was this article really necessary?

    • Leah

      August 15, 2016 at 8:27 pm

      SMH. So unnecessary.

    • BlueEyed

      August 16, 2016 at 6:27 am

      I swear this article is confusing…. I can’t. I just can’t

  3. Eve82

    August 15, 2016 at 8:02 pm

    We have bigger issues going on right now, than Banky’s marital status or lack of it…like really???

  4. Nahum

    August 15, 2016 at 8:05 pm

    I don tire for all these desperado girls that will not let Banky W rest. Na by force???? Ok you want to marry him, what are you bringing to the table? Most of these girls who are harassing Banky are jobless, lazy girls looking for who to hang the past, present and future on and then come on BN and start insulting feminists. Ladies, leave this guy alone and focus on yourself,

  5. Realist

    August 15, 2016 at 8:05 pm

    I would like to know the essence of this articles, Perhaps i missed it as i stopped reading quarter way through.

  6. Hopefully

    August 15, 2016 at 8:14 pm

    @Mo81 it is more like a shade to me…i do not think writing this article has helped in any way! Bella Naija has not helped too by updated “Most Eligible Bachelors’ list from 2015 – 2016!

  7. Miss leavebankyalone

    August 15, 2016 at 8:15 pm

    this is getting very annoying , Folks need to leave him alone
    He is not the only single bachelor entertainer, Why is everyone picking on him. I just hope he is not pressured to prove a point and end up with a mistake as most of the girls out there (and on his timeline are all mistakes).

    If he were my brother He may have to do like i watched in movie, go under disguise,, cos i personally dont trust and of the female.
    species out there.

    Banky the real true person for you does not even have an instagram account cos she doesnt need one – She is gorgeous down to earth and not vain like the 99.9% vain fake bitches on IG who wont leave you alone. She doesnt need daily clicks of likes to breath and feel a sense of worth in life.

    #TeamLeaveBankWAlone

  8. Miss leavebankyalone

    August 15, 2016 at 8:25 pm

    Oh and i have several celebrity male friends (Banky is not one of them) and bELLA the nonsense comments is the least of their problems – the biggest issue most of them have is the amount of naked pics most of these heffas send into their DM. when i say naked mean butt naked. Few of them showed me a screen shot and i was disgusted. Mean while these same girls will appear like angels on their own IG page. Fake posers.

    Some of these celeb men friends some are single – some are married and I told them the simplest thing to do is Block em. Simple.

    “some” females now a days are so disgusting.

    Devlish sent agents. Incubus Succubus trollops

  9. californiabawlar

    August 15, 2016 at 9:00 pm

    Story story….meanwhile, I’m about to join Instagram just so I can troll Banky! Cos he and all the people taking the way people mess with him so seriously are only making him a easier target.
    Sweetim, you’re our only sex…sorry marriage symbol. When you were singing Strong Thing and all those other sweet sweet lof songs you dinnor know! Abeg bear this cross with pride!

    • Tosin

      August 17, 2016 at 9:02 am

      bawlar want to enter hinstagran. epic!

  10. Pamela

    August 15, 2016 at 10:13 pm

    It’s Adesua Etomi not Adesua Otomi. Thanks.

  11. Chinma Eke

    August 15, 2016 at 11:10 pm

    Lol, lol and lol! Waiting for the credit alert that should compensate me for reading this.

  12. Tunmi

    August 16, 2016 at 5:13 am

    Where is the lengthy defense when his female counterparts are called worse on twitter???

    • Idomagirl

      August 16, 2016 at 4:55 pm

      Write your own defense na. Person hold you?

  13. Kelly

    August 16, 2016 at 6:39 am

    How is this long epistle necessary? Bellanaija next time you want to write an article please write on something necessary or at least entertaining. Learn from the New Yorker.

  14. Treasure Ebere

    August 16, 2016 at 7:39 am

    Sure waste of time

  15. LEM

    August 16, 2016 at 8:03 am

    I am not understanding the point of this harticle pleaze. Can someone henlighten hus pleaze…

  16. Ify

    August 16, 2016 at 8:35 am

    Adesua ETOMI not Otomi.

  17. Toese

    August 16, 2016 at 12:08 pm

    Too long
    Kilode
    Won sponsor e ni?

  18. fixnigeriaseries

    August 16, 2016 at 5:52 pm

    All I want is the 3 minutes of my life I spent reading this article back.

    Seriously, no interesting gist in Naija land dey again? Come, is he the oldest single male Nigerian celebrity? People will always talk: life is learning not to carry people’s rants on your head and clicking ignore when appropriate.

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