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Nkem DenChukwu: A Tribute to My Beloved Obiora

Nkem DenChukwu

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“Feels different with you gone,” he texted me at 6:53 PM on Monday, February 25.

It’s been known to take without permission, consideration, and discrimination. It’s callous and quick. It lurks in the dark, and in the daytime. I didn’t see it coming. Death, that is. It came and stole what did not belong to it. Obiora, my love! But, God was in the gaps. He is always in the gaps. Nothing in heaven, and on earth, ever happens without His knowledge.

“Nkee, I wish we can stay like this forever. Thank you for loving me. Thank you for being you and for being my love,” he said to me in those six days.

Spending Obiora’s last six days with him was the grace of God, just as beautiful and real as the four and half years that we loved each other. On the seventh day, Obiora got his wings. Ah! Sadness overwhelmed me, and joy suddenly left me. The angel of death hovered around us, waiting for me to leave, just to take his breath away and break my heart in a million ways.

Obiora was a good man. Imperfect, yet peaceful and gentle. A breath of fresh air, full of innovating ideas, lover of a healthy lifestyle and an Health Information Technology guru and ambassador.

He was nurturing, funny, humble, loved to dance, brilliant, 360 degrees kinder and tender, soft-spoken, God fearing, patient, brutally honest, great listener, a mentor to the young, counseled the old, my executive chef and best friend. The love of my life! He made me feel like I was the most beautiful girl.

‘Beautiful,’ he called me for as long as we were.

“Nkee, I first fell in love with your mind, and shortly, with all of you. I am so happy and lucky to have you in my life. Minutes into this New Year, I count my blessings, and thank God for us. I couldn’t hope for a more wonderful girl to spend the rest of my life with.” – January 1, 2019.

I’m trying not to question God, to find solace in the days and years I spent with him, but comfort and peace constantly leave me. Three days gone, I had to see him, where he laid cold. He still looked handsome, but his smile was gone. I wanted to touch his face, wake him up, hug him, just to warm you up a bit. He was asleep, without his head on my shoulder.

Seeing Obiora gone forever took my breath away, and my already-broken heart almost ran from me. I was instantly surrounded by a dense fog that burdened my body and soul. But my love remained calm and peaceful as always. No funny jokes from Obiora? That was the first. His voice was gone … forever! He never ceased to make me blush, giggle, and laugh out loud.

I desperately needed him to open his eyes, look at me, and say to me, “Hey Mama, everything will be okay,” like he always said to me. I called out ‘Onochie’ as I fondly called him, but he ignored me. For a moment, I was breathless, and could feel my fast-beating heart in my hands.

“I love you,” were the last three words we said to each other, just twelve hours before death came and hugged him instead.

Every season has its time and reason. Onochie, your stay here on earth was only for a moment, but it was priceless. You lived and not just existed. Your love and kindness touched many hearts. For these and more, I bless God for the grace to have loved you and be loved by you.

Now, I bask in the imperfectly perfect loving memories we shared. Thankful he fell in love with God with me. The grace of God was sufficient for Obiora. Grateful his faith in God remained unshaken till the end, and he surrendered all to Him. I pray our Father in Heaven grants Obiora eternal rest.

Death takes the body. God takes the soul. Our minds hold the memories. Our hearts keep the love. Our faith lets us believe we will meet again. Je nke oma, my Love. Until we meet again.

Nkem DenChukwu is a Lover of life & arts, an Advocate for battered women, men, & children, a Creative Writer, Award-Winning Filmmaker/Content Maker, and a Mother. Delved into the arts of filmmaking and creative writing in 2012. 7 books and 14 films under her belt since then. In 2018, Nkem was featured in Forbes Magazine (Digital Edition). Her creative verses were featured three times in The Oprah Winfrey Magazine. Nkem was a Huffington Post Contributor.For more details on Nkem DenChukwu’s work, visit www.nkemdenchukwu.com  

22 Comments

  1. Dr Elizabeth Olufuwa

    March 26, 2019 at 8:15 pm

    Nkem, I feel you and so sorry for this loss. The Lord will continue to uplift you in His hands and give you comfort and strength. May Obiora’s soul rest perfectly in the Lord

    1
  2. Didi Nwonye

    March 26, 2019 at 9:27 pm

    Death…..it is inevitable! Nkee, it is well. May the Holy Spirit console you and May Obiora’s soul continue to rest in peace, Amen!

    1
  3. Ify Ikwueme

    March 26, 2019 at 9:28 pm

    My dear Nkem…it’s only Good that will give us the fortitude to bear this huge loss….He was the best uncle anyone can wish for….May Obi’s soul rest in perfect peace..Amen

    1
  4. Didi Eriobuna

    March 26, 2019 at 9:29 pm

    Death…..it is inevitable! Nkee, it is well. May the Holy Spirit console you and May Obiora’s soul continue to rest in peace, Amen!

    1
  5. MERCY N ADEDUNTAN

    March 26, 2019 at 9:47 pm

    That’s the thing with love Nkem, it lives on. You’re lucky you tasted love, and lucky love also found you. In days to come it’s the same love that will see you through. I’m so sorry your Obiora is gone from here, but he’s still in you. ❤

    1
  6. Queenkay

    March 26, 2019 at 10:33 pm

    Nkem may God comfort your aching heart. May he Rest In Peace and May you always remember him fondly. Love you.

    1
  7. Nonnie.

    March 26, 2019 at 10:50 pm

    Am speechless Nkee, i did not know!!! I remember asking if everything was ok with you when i saw your DP and you responded with it’s well. Am really sorry for your loss. May God grant him eternal rest.

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  8. Nwando Chukwurah

    March 26, 2019 at 11:50 pm

    Nkem dear, it is well with you. Our prayers are with you at this time. Remain strong and keep hope alive. May Obiora’s gentle soul continue to rest in peace, Amen!

    1
  9. Chinweoke

    March 27, 2019 at 3:57 am

    Still speechless. What we had just finished discussing… Such a shock. Can’t imagine it. God dey but this one tire me.
    It is well, Nkem! It will be. May his dear soul Rest In Peace always. ??

    2
  10. Prince Lucky Enearu

    March 27, 2019 at 11:18 am

    The day is Done. From the Hill, from the Sea and from the Sky. All is well, Rest In Peace Obiora. God is good. Take heart my dear and stay strong as His spirit lives on. Amen

    1
  11. Torio S James

    March 27, 2019 at 12:43 pm

    Nkem,
    I’m so sorry for your loss. My sincere condolences.
    I know that your heart is broken and I ask God to heal your heart and restore your joy.
    I can remember when you two first started dating, how you would sound like a school girl in love, while you talked about what you two had cooked together the evening before.
    My friend, I am here for you.

    1
  12. Dr. Ngozi Ilouno

    March 27, 2019 at 2:33 pm

    Hi Nkem nwannem, what a beautifully written tribute to your beloved. You literally poured your thoughts both cherished and painful ones. It was very hard for me to read through this excellent but painful tribute. I can only imagine how difficult it must have been for you to write such a sincere tribute about your beloved Obiora. I felt like I have known him from eternity though I’ve never met him. I feel that it was also comforting for you sharing these thoughts. My prayer is that our good lord will mend those million pieces of a broken heart over the demise of a loved one and grant Obi eternal rest. It’s well my dearest sister. ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️?????

    1
  13. Nkechi Nwokolo

    March 27, 2019 at 7:36 pm

    It is well Nkem dear. You are strenghtened dear. Thank God for the memories you shared together and for the opportunity to love the way you both did. Time, they say, heals all broken-hearts and yours will heal also.

    1
  14. Melissa Wilson

    March 27, 2019 at 8:15 pm

    My darling friend, this is a beautiful tribute to the love of your life. We will continue to pray for you to find peace and full acceptance. Sending you light & love!!! Love, M

    1
  15. Stellamaris

    March 29, 2019 at 7:55 pm

    Awwwww. My darling, I weep and mourn with you. Know that earth is a place no one exists alife.

    I know that no amout of words can replace the emptiness in your heart. Death might seem as gone, as the physicality is gone, no touch, no sight etc.

    Still, it is the begining. The spirit never dies or decays, and as,such Obiora’s Spirit lives. As his Spirit transitioned peacefully through the mortal coil to the Cosmic Good/God, he remains a guardian angel to you at all times.

    Sending God”s infinite light of healing, peace, comfort and love to you and family. Peace profound ???❤❤❤.

    1
  16. Agulanna emeka

    March 30, 2019 at 2:22 pm

    Hello Nkem..really sorry to hear this and pray God gives u a comforting heart to deal with it..

    1
  17. Ogo Okeke

    March 30, 2019 at 3:47 pm

    Nkem my dear, l am very sorry for your loss. May God almighty console you. Nne take heart May his soul Rest In Peace amen.

    1
  18. Vivien Iweanya

    March 31, 2019 at 4:52 am

    My dear, may our Good Lord continue to console all of us. Obi’s death shook everybody. He was from Mummy’s umunna. Continue to hold your memories with him close to your heart. May our Good Lord give u the fortitude with which to bear this irreparable loss. Ndo my dear????

    1
  19. Chioma Ogbonnanze

    April 6, 2019 at 12:31 am

    Nkem Nne, words alone cannot express my sympathy , God knows the best. Obiora is in a better place looking out for you . Remain blessed.

    1
  20. Constance Oranu

    April 7, 2019 at 10:42 pm

    Nkem dear please accept my deepest sympathy. May Obiora’s soul through the Mercy of God test in peace Amen ?

    1
  21. Constance Oranu

    April 7, 2019 at 10:46 pm

    Nkem dear please accept my deepest sympathy. May Obiora’s soul through the Mercy of God Rest In Peace Amen ?

    1
  22. Joy Attah

    April 13, 2019 at 7:58 am

    Nkem my dear sis please take heart and be consoled that he is in a better place. It’s not easy dealing with the loss of a loved one but be assured our ever loving & faithful God will always be there to comfort & watch over you. May his soul continually rest in perfect peace…jisike nwannem.

    1

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