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Lagos’ Most Coded Fashion Show(Off)



I’ve been to quite a number of events and these include a lot of fashion shows but seriously, none of these fashion shows can be compared to this and yet it’s so coded.

I commend the organizers of the show for a job well done. Unlike some other fashion shows, you don’t require an invite or tickets to attend. Neither are participants screened before they hit the runway…it’s a total DIY and yes, you can hit the runway with your BO or MO and in some cases, both.

Considering the fact that no entrance fee is charged for participation, companies are charged a large sum of money to display and sell their wares in stalls all around the runway.

The runway on the other hand is quite large and can accommodate more than 50 participants at once even with the stalls on each sides.

Now, here’s the gist, rumour has it that some of the participants come all the way from Ogun State every Sunday to take part in the show and due to the traffic situation the organizers of this show have made it mandatory to have LASTMA officers on the road leading to the venue .

Here’s a typical participant Sunday to do list.

A. Dress up

B.Go to Church

C.Go for the show

But then for some of them there are usually two things on their list

A. Dress up

B. Go for the show

As a participant, you acquire marks according to the number of times you walk on the runway and this is done in groups.

The sachet-OMO- buying group is a very dedicated group. They come to the show, walk on the runway for a period of 40 minutes non-stop, go into one of the shops, buy the smallest sachet of OMO, put it in the biggest trolley and push it to the center of the car park before putting the OMO in their bag.

In so doing, they will score marks against “Steps without trolley (%)” and “Step while pushing trolley (%)”.

For over two years, the sachet-OMO –buying participants were leading in the competition until last year when a new group emerged-The Notice Me group

The Notice-Me group participants walk on the runway for 50 minutes, stop occasionally to check out LCD TVs on display, throw their gum into one of the bins at the center of the runway, greet everybody that looks familiar, take pictures with their Nokia 3310 with external camera, but it’s against their religion to enter any shop and make a purchase.

The activities of this new group have been reported to the organizers by the Young-naija girls-with-father-figure-Oyinbo-boyfriend group. They accuse them of winking at their Oyinbo fathers’ boyfriends while on the runway.

However, on a closer look, the only group that really contributes to the welfare of the organizers of this show is the I-came-here-just-to-shop group.

They spend minimal time on the runway, enter one of the shops, make their purchase and afterwards move straight to their cars with three trolleys being pushed behind them.

Apart from the normal catwalk on the runway, side attraction includes borrowing Oyinbo for photographs and snapping pictures with celebrities.

This show (off) takes place every Sunday from 10 am to 9 pm at the Palms Shopping Mall, Lekki.

Will you be there this Sunday?

The Runway

The Runway

The Must Have Accessory of the Season - Oyinbo BF

The Must-Have Accessory of the Season -The Oyinbo BF

Basketfull of Shopping - Oh Oh Its Just 1 Satchet of Omo

Basketfull of Shopping - Oh Oh Its Just 1 Satchet of Omo

Family Quality Time - Watching TV

Family Quality Time - Watching TV


  1. jrabbit21

    July 19, 2009 at 8:24 pm

    This is funny and well written. The family quality time was classic…haha.

  2. policeisyourfriend

    July 19, 2009 at 10:21 pm

    Noble Igwe is not serious…i really thot he was talking about a real fashion show!!lol..i was like ahn!ahn!which kin fashion show be this we ydem dey let everyone parade really its not much different from the malls in obodo oyibo…people hang around in their best baffs doing nothing and window shopping…funny n sarcastic post ….
    that being said i dont think its nice that you took these peoples picture and put it up here…especially since the post is obviously mocking them..not cool at all..the “Family Quality Time – Watching TV” could have been people waiting for someone..the one that you tagged “The Oyinbo BF” could have been her friend..

  3. Ify

    July 20, 2009 at 12:25 am

    Hey, that is a very funny article!!! It was hilarious. But looking at it from another perspective, this may be the only thing the “Omo satchet buying group” looks forward to at weekends. TO have fun and get the feel of shopping. If our Country were more developed, maybe this wont be the case. Even in developed Countries, the same thing happens and people just go for window shopping but not necessarily buying OMO. Leave them to have fun jare. Lol. Well written article. A compelling read!!!

  4. Catwalq

    July 20, 2009 at 1:30 am

    The one time I went there, I wondered why everyone was so dressed up….now, I know

  5. Ezi

    July 20, 2009 at 8:12 am

    Aaaahhhh Noble, you had me reeling in laughter here! I actually was curious to read about this ‘coded fashion show’ only for me to find out that…(i admit, you had me fooled there).
    Good piece there..

  6. eggone

    July 20, 2009 at 1:21 pm

    very funny and witty post

  7. yhurmie

    July 20, 2009 at 4:14 pm

    Chei nna, u killed it; just wicked! Lol. And as always, intriguing read…

  8. efelicious

    July 20, 2009 at 5:34 pm

    i luv ur way of reasoning…lovely pose tho

  9. efelicious

    July 20, 2009 at 5:36 pm

    meant to say ‘post’

  10. Nneka

    July 20, 2009 at 10:30 pm

    hehehehe *Some serious chuckling here* funny stuff. This Noble guy likes to communicate indirectly sha. This is the 2nd (or so) post written in this approach. I bet you’re just as indirect when scoping chics. hehehehe. Or are you……not?

  11. divalicious baby

    July 21, 2009 at 12:02 am

    when i saw noble’s name i knew i was goin to read smth veeery nice. lol @ d family spending quality time. n to d person defending the family in d photo yes…. somethings are really wot dey seem! some girl on the radio early ds yr said her new yr resolution was to stop hangin @ d mall doin nuthin bt stalking celebs. ah ah! nice one nobz .carry go!

  12. Trendy

    July 21, 2009 at 1:15 am

    Great job, i luv this. For this reason i avoid shoprite on weekends.

  13. Trendy

    July 21, 2009 at 1:41 am

    i could not help but re-read this piece. “borrowing Oyinbo for pictures” … too funny.

    Again, great job Noble. Do not stay away too long, we need more articles like this, on the regular.

  14. fadi

    July 21, 2009 at 11:33 am

    hahahaha, uyahlanya! I don’t blame them jo, if only for the uninterrupted power supply..

  15. pepe

    July 21, 2009 at 4:49 pm

    I dont blame Nigerians….if maybe themselves was constant power supply people will stay in their houses and stop parading themselves…Also, because these things like malls and cinemas are somewhat new to us …people still think they are a big deal…I mean just go to Silverbird to see a movie and people will be dressed to kill..even folks that lived abroad o ..that u think they know better than wearin 5 inch heels to the cinema…I was looking at pictures of the past Le Petit Marche…for those than dont know what it is… it is an indoor flea market type thing o and trust now…naija girls were baffed up with their cameras in hand to take pictures(we gats to know they were present at a flea market now) …i no blame us we too like to show off

  16. mary

    July 21, 2009 at 6:21 pm

    Bella where is my comment?

  17. Lamide

    July 21, 2009 at 11:37 pm

    Nice one, Nobes!

  18. pepe

    July 22, 2009 at 3:50 am

    I dont think it is fair that he took people picture in public without their permission.That is messed up abeg.

  19. Aibee

    March 9, 2010 at 5:50 pm

    Didn’t have to read too far into the article to know it was either the palms or galleria. Like someone said earlier, this things are new to naija and as lond as fashion and lifestyle magazines e.g thisday style continue to take pictures at those places, people will continue to dress to kill,wear skyscraper heels,borrow oyinbo for pictures, walk the runway,etc in the hope of getting into the mags and/or taking a picture with ‘celebs’
    Great Piece.

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