I was just seeing a friend off from the Counseling Room, when I got a call from my sister Pastor Tosin. She asked me if my sister Tomi had called me to tell me anything, and I said no, and then she told me that my sister Tomi has been diagnosed with cancer of the ovary. At that moment, it seemed like my world had come to an end. I calmly ended the call with my sister, bade my friend farewell, walked back to the Counseling Room, picked up my phone and called my sister to find out how bad the Cancer situation was.
It was and will always be the shocker of 2011 for me, because on the 30th of October 2010, I had just given my sister’s hand in Marriage to Yomi in Lagos at one of the RCCG parishes in VI Lagos. She had come home with Ifeanyi, Moji and more of her friends from the UK, while they had Simisola, her childhood and best friend waiting for her here in Nigeria. In Nigeria, Simi had done so much for her in preparation for the wedding, and Yomi was also here then, but relocated after the wedding to join Tomi in the UK where he has now been given a permanent stay by the UK Home Office.
I spoke with her that night and was led to talk to her about life after death. By the Grace of God I have been born again and was not afraid of death knowing the death of Christ on the cross of Calvary had taken away the sting of death. I also believe that God through the death of Christ Jesus had borne our diseases and carried away our pain, so I knew we have a promise of healing, and so I could believe God for my sister, Tomi’s healing, but I was lead to talk to her about the Life after Death Experience. I had never had one, but I know two people who had, one was my wife Lawrenta, and the other was a good friend Shade. I told Tomi I was going to call Shade and ask her to talk to her about her experience with death and life. Shade called her, narrated her experience, and by the time Tomi called me back, she was full of hope and realized that for her to live is Christ and to die was gain. You may never understand that unless you give your life to Christ and let the excellent spirit He gives through re-birth be given to you. From that moment on, I would call Tomi and her husband Yomi to encourage them, and to help Tomi build her Faith which she was already living by.
I remember at Tomi’s Wedding, she danced so much like she had never danced before, while I was taking her in the procession into the Church to meet Yomi who was joyfully waiting by the Altar, we had gone in with a song that says “Enter into your Season” chosen by her. During her procession into the wedding reception, her Husband and herself had danced to a Praise Yoruba song which says “O ti mumi gbagbe o, Ibanuje Igbakan. A se were ni ise Oluwa, Oba ti ape to nje”. Both songs meant so much to her because, she had always wanted to get married, and to the right guy too. By the time she told me about Yomi, I asked her if she was sure of him. I was so concerned because I told her that my other sisters had married down, and I am not sure how it was helping them. You see when a Lady marries down, it means if she was doing very well before marriage, after marriage she may not make progress from where she was before she got married, but will now start struggling to remain where she was before she got married doing everything to provide for the family all alone, and that may not be the perfect will of God for any woman.
She told me there was a great testimony behind her meeting Yomi with the Lord’s Hand in it, and that Yomi had a role to play in her life. I believed her and handed her over to Yomi in Marriage representing my late father Anthony Kwaovi Onipede, and everything went well. Tomi got pregnant, and then had a miscarriage, went to the hospital for a check up and at that point she was told a cancer of the ovary was detected. I can imagine what went through her mind then. Immediately she sent texts to her Pastors, Agu and Shola, and also to Pastor Joe and his wife, to let them know the development. I believe she was re assured and also prayed for by them. She also had the privilege of being prayed for by Pastor E.A Adeboye being a Worker in RCCG Jesus House, London herself. So if it is about prayer, people prayed for her. I stopped praying when I asked the Lord what He would like me to believe Him for concerning my sister, and He gave me a word in Isaiah 65; 10 and Ecclesiates 8. In those two passages, He showed me a picture of tranquility, provision and security; He also made me understand that there are different battles in life, but when it was the battle of Death, it has a job to do which is to bring us into Life itself, and out of every sorrow, needs, pain etc into a Life that is worth experiencing. No one wins this battle. Lawrenta and Shade had had a life after death experience because it was not their time yet, when their time comes, they cannot win that battle, because it’s the transportation that takes us when our time is up here to a better place, but one thing is for sure, no one here on earth has a concrete taste of Heaven and wants to return back here. And that’s where Tomi is now, she is in that better place, and no longer here with us. She went to be with the Lord on the 13th of October 2011, exactly 17days to her 1st wedding anniversary. And Yomi, her husband stood by her throughout her cancer ordeal. I guess that was why Yomi had come into her life. Her last words to me is “Yaovi, I love you” and I told her I love her too.
That’s why I left work for sometime to go to the UK to bury my sister’s body, and she had the best burial ceremony given to her by RCCG Jesus House.
Was Yomi then a loser? Definitely not! Why did Tomi come into his life? Was it to create a setback for him? Definitely not! Before Yomi had met Tomi, he had already met with so many setbacks in life, and was not a man in possession of what he ought to have acquired up till that time. He was also not a man who was where he ought to be. But Yomi had prayed, and toiled and believed that God is alive and well. When Tomi came into his alive, despite the fact that it was brief, Yomi moved into the UK with Tomi and immediately was in position to get a permanent stay which he has now, because Tomi had a British Passport. Tomi also pushed him well enough to have him go for Courses and Training that made him a Licensed International Coach and now he can train football teams anywhere in the world. Yomi is not begging in the UK, but comfortable enough to get far in life. I believe this is where the Lord had always had in mind for him, but I know if the Lord had told him that Tomi would die 17 days to their wedding anniversary, I am sure he may have backed out, so the Lord led him into it, and gave him the grace to go through it. Tomi and Yomi didn’t have the perfect marriage, because I saw so many texts Tomi was sending to him in her phone, but I believe they had the Marriage that was meant to be. Through Yomi, Tomi had her dream of being married here on earth come through, and through Tomi, Yomi got the leverage he had always wished for in this life.
Jerome Yaovi Onipede is a Relationship/Social Style Consultant who has become a Brand in the area of Personal Counseling, Relationship Coaching and Matchmaking.
His ability to analyse Personality Types is amazing. An experience with him takes you on a journey into yourself and brings you back loving yourself more than you have ever done. He is certified to use the most current and reliable Personal Profiling Tools.
Africans first had a taste of him as “The Counselor on Newdawn with Funmi Iyanda on NTA Network” which was on cable over Africa, and with more audience as Relationship Coach on MNET’s Moments with MO.
He has written for Sunday Sun, The Tribune, This Day “Glitterarati”, JOY Magazine, The Street Hawker Magazine etc. He presently writes for The Vanguard Allure of the Vanguard Newspaper.
When Jerome is not conducting Dating Events in London, Accra, Abuja, Lagos or Cotonou, you will find him in his Counseling Room, Consulting with a Client. Jerome believes he has made some Vital Life Decisions, and he’s now helping others to make theirs. He is married to his best Friend Lawrenta Omono, and they both have four Gentlemen together.