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Chima Onyewuchi: What Is Your Type?

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dreamstime_xl_40496631I think we can all agree that physical attraction is very important when it comes to choosing who you want to be in a relationship with. I think it is actually as important as the other factors such as spirituality, intelligence, sense of humour, etc. This is because it is almost impossible to be in a true/real relationship with someone you are not physically attracted to. So based on this physical attributes/characteristics, let’s look at this issue of ‘type’. Some of us are only physically attracted to people with certain physical attributes.

We hear this a lot “he is not my type/she is not my type”, quite a number of us both male and female claim to only be attracted to certain types of people – Short, tall, dark, fair, muscular, skinny, curvy, etc. For some it is not set in stone while for others it is. Meaning, they are not so rigid on the issue, they are still relatively flexible so will still be okay with however the person is.

I was having a conversation with a female friend recently and she said she preferred tall and dark guys while another said she prefers light-skinned guys. For the men, you would see that some like their women thick and the others, the exact opposite. I know a guy who only likes curvy women and another who likes light-skinned and short women. The list of people’s preferences is quite endless. While for some of us, we can’t actually put a finger on what our type is because we are attracted to different types. A friend asked what my type is and I told her that I honestly do not know. Why? Because I have dated tall, short, curvy, skinny and based on physical attributes, I did not prefer anyone to the other, I did not like one more than the other. I am sure there are other people who also fall in this category (I hope).
So for those who have a type, why does this happen? Do you just wake up one morning and decide that you only want to date people with certain physical attributes? Or have you always been that way since when you were old enough to like anyone? Personally, I do not think there is anything wrong with preferring a particular type but at the same time I do not think anyone should make it a do or die affair. I mean the other qualities should be able to make up for the fact that the person is not tall, short or curvy enough for you. I am sure there are a lot of people who are happily married to someone who they thought was not their type. I want to believe that no man or woman is unhappy because they are dating or married to someone who is not their type.

To end this, I’d like to ask a few questions – what is your type? And if you date or get married to someone who isn’t your type, does it mean that you are settling? If your partner is not exactly your type, would you let him or her know that you actually have a type or keep it ‘lowkey’ so you don’t make him or her insecure?

Photo Credit: Dreamstime | Sam74100

Chima studied Demography & Social Statistics at Obafemi Awolowo University and currently works as business analyst in a leading online marketplace. He loves music and is a part-time DJ. You can find him on Instagram @chiwuzy and twitter @_wuzy_

87 Comments

  1. nimi

    May 6, 2015 at 2:00 pm

    My type: Tall and Dark and Fineeeeeeee
    Why? Vanity i guess
    Dated, Tall and Fineeeeee, Tall and Finee, Short and dark and Fine
    Married: Average height and Fineee oh and fair in complexion
    So did i settle, naaa just discarded some of my fleshy decisions and used my godly hearty one to make the final decision….

    • Meena

      May 6, 2015 at 5:25 pm

      My type is just Jesus and the Angels… I don’t like having ‘unreasonable standards’?

    • Meena

      May 6, 2015 at 7:36 pm

      “I want to believe that no man or woman is unhappy because they are dating or married to someone who is not their type.”

      Ahh sisteh you gotta start unbelieving oh. You see, My uncle who loves curvy women married this really slim woman because she looked ‘acceptable’. You need to see him now… He’s disgusted by her and literally uses every opportunity to tell her that she too skinny and should add weight. Honestly, I pity the woman more cus she tries everything to add weight, it does not work…you know Hausa girls now, they just never gain so much. Plus she’s living a depressed life. Her husband doesn’t find her attractive because she’s not his type. I’m not sure he cheats on her sexually, but he definitely cheats on her emotionally and physically….checking out bare curvy girls everytime, even in front of her fa.

      Abeg, start disbelieving oh. Nothing worse than being with someone that doesn’t consider you their type…worst still, one that is with you and likes another ‘type’ that is not you.

    • Leah

      May 6, 2015 at 7:19 pm

      I know right? What if my Tall and Dark man wants a super model and not my small behind? I have come across some tall and fine guys that I wouldn’t give a chance in h3ll. I think the older you get, the more mature you get, the more people you meet, the wiser you become. You begin to see and cherish the character in people in general as opposed to what they look like. If you are lucky, those physical features may very well come with the character you value in a man. But there is a big difference between a crush and love, and one is only skin deep.

  2. Busola Adedire

    Oluwabusola Adedire

    May 6, 2015 at 2:08 pm

    Having a ‘type’ is being close-minded and love does not work that way, I believe attraction is more mental than physical. It’s about the energy, confidence, and intellect they carry.

    • Team Light

      May 6, 2015 at 3:59 pm

      Well, something in him must have attracted you first before you get to know his mental, intellect, spiritual aspect etc. We referring to that physical aspect now. Most women love dark skinned guys dark but am just the opposite. I love light skinned guys, am obsessed with them, the moment i see a light skinned guy i must take a second good look at him. I just dont fancy every light skinned guy thou, he must have some special attributes also. I have specs heheeeeeee

    • Busola Adedire

      Oluwabusola Adedire

      May 6, 2015 at 4:30 pm

      Sorry to bust your bubble, not everybody have specs like you.. Some of us actually rate other qualities over looks. Looks will get you the man/woman, it does not necessarily keep them.

    • cindy

      May 8, 2015 at 3:36 am

      My dear I agree with you joor. Don’t mind the superiority complexed @olubusola. Something must attract you first before you start seeing the other specs. I’m like you in that,I love light-skinned guys that are of average height.
      To the author, here is my reason. I did not wake up one day and decided that this was my type. I’m really dark skinned and I was insulted a lot for my skin colour when I was young. I’m able to live with it now but I don’t wan my kids to go through what I went through, thus I’m hoping a light skinned hubby will give be moderately coloured kids. I might sound ignorant but that’s my reason.
      Secondly, I’m really short and I was bullied a lot when I was younger. Almost all my classmates were bigger than me so I was always the one who got beat up whenever a fight occurred. My older brother also beat the hell out of me. Hence, I find tall guys quite intimidating. I don’t want short either because I fear for my sons and my dad is shorter than my mum. It has always caused issues in their marriage. Also, mummy can’t wear heels cos of hubby and I love heels.
      So BN commenters, not everyone likes some physical attributes just because they are shallow. Let’s stop being judgemental.

    • oy

      May 6, 2015 at 4:06 pm

      we all know at the end of the day you may/may not marry your”type” but everyone has a type, what will normally just appeal to you

    • D

      May 6, 2015 at 6:25 pm

      @Oluwabusola Adedire, there is nothing closed minded about having a “type” as the author put it. The point the author was trying to make is that something in the opposite or same sex as the case may be gets your attention, that is before they open their mouth or you get to know them up close and personal. Why is it that you see some people and right away you just know ain’t nothing going to attract me to this person, no matter or sweet or nice they are. Because like i tell people you sleep with the person “physical” not with their mind and when you are with that person in that way there has to be a level of attraction. why does that happen because wether we accept it or not something in us is attracted to certain traits in others. Now relying solely on the physical is where the shallowness comes in. Even for those that claim they look at mind, religion, attitude or whatever, we all have different minds and something brings about how our minds, attitude are developed and so what you might find attractive about someone’s mind i might find unattractive. For example, someone that is simplistic, in the sense that everything has to be broken down to its simplest form, for some people they think that is being intelligent for me it is being “slow”. I mean it is just common sense do we have to break everything down to its simplest form. My point is you may want to think about your comment because it just came across as being close minded.

    • Busola Adedire

      Oluwabusola Adedire

      May 6, 2015 at 7:31 pm

      It’s a personal opinion.. it doesn’t have to be your own truth. Just like the author said, maybe there are people who have no particular ‘mold’ for the people they’ve dated. We are all different.

    • IJ

      May 6, 2015 at 9:07 pm

      My dear this is a lie from the pit of hell. That is exactly how love works. If you dont find the person physically attractive you wont be able to continue the relationship to the point of even falling in love.

  3. ACE

    May 6, 2015 at 2:31 pm

    Hmmmmm not particular on skin colour but I love tall and fine brothers. I have dated tall and ugly, dated short and fine, so I guess am not so particular on type but I would prefer to marry a tall man at least.

    • Tosin

      May 6, 2015 at 3:42 pm

      tall and ugly sounds like fine. loooool. have you watched ‘Kissing Jessica Stein’ ?

  4. Alice

    May 6, 2015 at 2:36 pm

    if we follow spec like we call it many of us would be single…….the man or woman God has for us may be found in a type we never considered …if na by type most of us would be married by now

  5. J

    May 6, 2015 at 2:40 pm

    I just want a guy with strong values who is crazy about me. Been over 2 years a boo……………is this too much to ask? 🙁

    • J

      May 6, 2015 at 2:40 pm

      *Without a boo

    • Nero

      May 6, 2015 at 4:38 pm

      Can never be too much. Depends on what u have been looking for?

  6. Quincy

    May 6, 2015 at 2:43 pm

    I used to have a type but that changed as I grew older but the bottom line was that the men had to be fine and taller than I am, I had terrible experiences with short men; long story!

    As for the reason I had a type,well like you rightly pointed out, physical attraction is as relevant as other factors. Noone wants to get married to someone they can’t drool after or feel goosebumps for because if they do, there is a solid chance that they’ll drool at someone else who isn’t their type; it doesn’t necessarily mean they’ll cheat or anything but they’ll definitely fantasize or swoon. As much as im spiritual, the real deal is that sex/ attraction is 80% flesh and 20% spiritual. If a man doesn’t fall within my specs, the chance of it working out will definitely be slim.

    • Tosin

      May 6, 2015 at 3:41 pm

      i disagree on the 80-20 thing.
      but what do i know? no matter how kinikan spiritually and pyhsically i’ll still look around when necessary. especially physically, nobody is that kinikan abeg.

    • oy

      May 6, 2015 at 4:08 pm

      i don’t even like short men.. many of them have “small person” syndrome, always defensive and it irritates me.

    • Meena

      May 6, 2015 at 5:37 pm

      Sigh. Can’t everyone just stick to their height levels?
      Short guys, stick to short girls and vice versa? No?

      Dazzow those short men would be coming to meet me like I’m their height mate ?

      Na play oh.
      Btw, why does my avatar change with each post? ?

  7. Oluwaseun Banjo

    May 6, 2015 at 2:48 pm

    I think change is always constant on choosing who you! Anyway, I’ll go for………….

    • Oluwaseun Banjo

      May 6, 2015 at 2:48 pm

      **on choosing

  8. @edDREAMZ

    May 6, 2015 at 2:49 pm

    a.k.a EDWIN CHINEDU AZUBUKO said…
    .
    If i want to marry i will first of all consider my unborn children and i dont want marry an ugly woman bcos i no wan born ghost abeg……
    .
    .
    ***CURRENTLY IN JUPITER***

  9. Lonely Girl...

    May 6, 2015 at 2:55 pm

    My type… had more to do with character than physique. but still been unfortunate I meet wolves in sheep clothing that makes me wonder if i myself am alright.

    Right now am blank, close to 30 and lonely. I take each day as it comes but wish I was in a relationship with someone I can call my own. Last dude was a short stature guy who used my line to call another lady to come and sleep over since I don;t sleep over. How I found out? thank God for a call recorder app.

    I only pray for the grace to wait for HIM, prayerfully and engage in interesting things.

    • Oluwaseun Banjo

      May 6, 2015 at 3:11 pm

      I understand what you’re saying dear, there are so many wolves in sheep’s clothing out there.
      May God give us a discerning spirit to know who we mingle with………

    • BeingSingleIsNotADeathSentence

      May 6, 2015 at 4:52 pm

      Not every time moan or focus on ‘singleness’, sometimes enjoy life alone!

    • Jho

      May 7, 2015 at 3:21 pm

      My dear dont lie to yourself. Being single is fun but sometimes you need that one special person to share stuff with.

    • chi-e-z

      May 6, 2015 at 5:15 pm

      That’s why you look for wolves in wolves clothing instead 😀 Atleast if I know you I know exactly what 2 expect and can only blame myself when it come my way.

  10. E.O

    May 6, 2015 at 2:57 pm

    I ain’t got no type! Bad….

    Lol all my crushes look alike! (x_x). Dark. Like really dark. Good looking. Beards. Introverts. Cool headed like really cool headed. Limited use of social media. They all have that in common. Conincedence? I think not. Someone has a type!

    I know what I’m not attracted to though. Thin lips, like those really thin lips, light skinned, I’d say short (but my ex is short- we started dating over the phone so I was gone too deep before I could care about height ;-( sigh) , people who talk too much. Guys who talk too much. I’m just not attracted to it. We can be the good friends but that’s that. I also don’t like popular guys. Lol bye

    • Asher

      May 6, 2015 at 5:36 pm

      Na wa oo…. Your own is strong ooo. Lol

    • zee

      May 6, 2015 at 8:15 pm

      U re my twin sister….u nailed it

    • Same girl

      May 7, 2015 at 12:29 am

      GIRL WE SHOULD BE TWINS! LOL

  11. mikel

    May 6, 2015 at 2:59 pm

    Some people are even interested in a combination of some ideal features in their future partners that you will start wondering how possible it is for them get such a person

  12. arin

    May 6, 2015 at 3:01 pm

    Tall…in between light and dark…chubby,yes I like him chubby…and fiineeeee!he doesn’t have to look like john legend or lamar. If he is tall n chubby And can package himself…let’s go there!

  13. Profound

    May 6, 2015 at 3:19 pm

    I don’t consider myself picky, but somehow I only pick VERY tall brothers, or actually I suppose they pick me…lol.. To cut to the chase, while marrying a tall guy was definitely my preference, it was in no way mandatory, but fortunately for me, I married a hot, chocolate, 6 ft 5 guy!

  14. Ola

    May 6, 2015 at 3:23 pm

    Nice one, but we all ca

  15. My type

    May 6, 2015 at 3:27 pm

    Is good to have a type but not obsessed about it. I had a type but decided to throw it all away cos of his good character. We are married now and though he moves heaven and earth to please me, i guess the fact that i decided to overlook his physical or (or my type) till affects me. He doesn’t know but i sometimes wish i had put this into consideration b4 accepting the ring. I get really scared about this and really don’t know what to do. It has really affected my sex life cos we decided to abstain before marriage and now i am not excited to even do it. He makes me happy though but sometimes i wonder…

    • hon

      May 6, 2015 at 5:07 pm

      NOW SOME SENSE. thank you

    • hon

      May 6, 2015 at 5:12 pm

      awwww i’m so sorry about it dear. but if its any consolation, all marriages need work o. whether you are physically, crazily attracted to him or not. you have it in you, start getting those lingeries, do things that will excite both of you…
      i [email protected] not being obsessed about one’s “type”

    • bod

      May 6, 2015 at 8:21 pm

      Almost same boat as you.
      Difference is that our sex life is okay. Everything is fine just that niggling thought every now and then that physically, the hubs is not quite my type.
      perhaps it’s just human nature to focus on the unattainable/stuff one does not have.

    • Belema

      May 6, 2015 at 8:36 pm

      REBUKE that nature oo! na so e dey take start! 🙂 lol

    • Belema

      May 6, 2015 at 8:35 pm

      Just be contended with what you have, you may have married your type now but he wouldn’t be moving heaven and earth to please you.. CONTENTMENT IS KEY TO A HAPPY AND FULFILLED LIFE!!

    • PurpleiciousBabe

      May 7, 2015 at 1:05 pm

      Babes stop wondering..If you keep wondering it wont help. Stay focused.
      Something made you say YES.
      Please hold on to it. Pray to find him attractive.
      Truth be told, your type may not move heaven and earth for you.
      So…..
      Please be happy. Some have their types and they are not happy.

  16. Doxa

    May 6, 2015 at 3:31 pm

    1. Am I comfortable enough to introduce him to my family and friends without being concerned that they will say he is not fine?
    2. Will I feel somehow to be seen in public with him?
    3. Can I look at his face for an elogated period during a conversation and not think that he is not fine and can picture his face and smile when we are apart?
    4. Can I maintain pleasant and intelligent conversation with him?
    5. Do I strike up conversations with him in my mind when he is not there?
    6. Does he understand my jokes and do I understand his?
    7. Do I feel improved after spending time with him or do I feel drained?

    If I can answer yes to the above physical and mental attribute questions, then he is probably my type. Will my husband have all the above plus the right spiritual values? I hope so.
    His spirituality (basically his love for God) is my deal breaker.

    • Meena

      May 6, 2015 at 7:12 pm

      Ahh… That expectation of family and friends thing ees a big thing oh.

      Lol at some point sef you start doubting ya eyes.

      “…tbh he was fine the last time I saw him, why does he look darker on the day he’s meeting my friends? …ahan, shebi he was taller naw?….Oh Lord I already told them he speaks like an Aussie..why is he now sound Nigerian today?!”

      Lol these things go deep.

    • mauve

      May 6, 2015 at 8:25 pm

      Lmao Meena. U got me! Hahaha

  17. Kechy

    May 6, 2015 at 3:36 pm

    Do I have a type? YES! Tall or @ most taller than I am, even if only by an inch or two; Dark chocolate caramel skin, well groomed beards that stroke against your skin when you rub your face against his. Full lips; if it comes in pink then awesome! We’ll be missing one too many appointments with me chewing on them endlessly! *chuckles* properly groomed fingernails and toe nails. A mind and brain that dazzles beyond reasoning. Love art, prose, music, travel and cuddles (loads of cuddles)…I can go on and on…

    Have I met my type? Yes! It felt surreal! A friend did the match-make after hearing me tirelessly define ‘my type’. She had a friend that fit the description. We were really good friends for well over a year but we just weren’t getting to the “exclusive relationship” part. Then it hit me! As much as I had a type, the big question was this; was I ‘the type’ of ‘my type’?? Don’t get me wrong, this may or may not be one of the reasons we never happened! But it was a good reason for pause…

    Of course we would love some attributes of a person over others, but trust me, they can never be exclusive! So when next you want to create a straight jacket type, be most certain you fall under the category of your type’s “TYPE”

    Cheers!

    • Sugar

      May 6, 2015 at 4:23 pm

      Oh yes i love what u wrote, totally awesome! Are you also the type for him? this is a question every girl should ask herself. The same way we women have specs is the same way men also have their own type. Work on yourself and look good but if you’re introduced to a guy and he’s not really interested in taking the relationship further then you might probably not be his type. You gat to keep it moving and Pray to God the man you desire also sees you as his type. Don’t take it personal when a guy ure drooling over seem not interested.

      My type must dress well, am very particular about dressing and i love fine men. He must be handsome, tall with broad chest and also slim. I dont like chubby men, I feel they are lazy in bed. i need a face paced man in bed so my choice for a slim man is very critical.

    • hon

      May 6, 2015 at 5:17 pm

      YES YES YES. if you have a type just make sure you are your type’s type. study your type beforehand and know what appeals to him/her.

    • Ha

      May 6, 2015 at 8:11 pm

      you need meet my BF

    • Diced Pineapples

      May 7, 2015 at 1:03 pm

      oh lala!!! i like this. @kechy yes! exactly if you have a type does your type fit in your own personality? or rather still is your TYPE Your TYPE ? as for me i do not have a type but i end up being with guys that are almost everyone’s type, how about that fella? what will you call me ”the lucky one?” i dont care if you are tall, dark and handsome, short or what have you? once we click we are on’ you dont treat me right forget it, we are off! cos some guys have this qualities of the so called ”MY TYPE” and they do not treat women right, i wont stay in a relationship and get abused all beacuse someone is my TYPE. but i’d never date an extremely ugly guy not even for riches.

  18. Tosin

    May 6, 2015 at 3:36 pm

    i have a type. i go against type all the time.
    type: dark hair, if oyinbo. dark chocolata, if dudu.
    not type: wear a suit. button the shirt. tight clothing.
    type: metrosexual. broad shoulders.
    not type: asshole. accountant. fat.
    etc.
    i go against type all the time tho.

  19. Paloma

    May 6, 2015 at 3:55 pm

    hmmm… i did have a type… tall, dark, cool, intelligent and cute but when i met my boo my type was reduced by 1, and that is *tall…. he is tall tho but not the way i wanted he is a lil bit taller dan me. I luv him and i had to live with it, u cant get a perfect man tho….;) I luv my boo d way he is 😀

  20. paloma

    May 6, 2015 at 4:18 pm

    hmmmm……. my type…..Tall, Dark, God fearing, Cute, cool, Loves music, can sing,can dance, can cook, intelligent and i found all that in my boo 😉 what else would a bae ask for? I Luv him much!

  21. geez

    May 6, 2015 at 4:26 pm

    hmm i believe its a balance between good looks and the innate traits. when u decide to sacrifice ur “type” and go for something else well u have to push thru till the end that’s what u have to bare in mind. if that’s possible by ur standards, then way to go. with me personally the inner beauty always out weighs the outer. i kinda love guys with a a soft side, who are great listeners, a lil introverted and who can easily read me without me saying anything yes. unfortunately i somehow like guys who give me a lil tough time too lol that’s strange right ? anyway so much for an ideal guy.

    • Tee

      May 7, 2015 at 1:50 pm

      You are me!!! esp the part where he should understand me without having to say a word.

  22. ij

    May 6, 2015 at 4:50 pm

    Generally i feel when people say type , it refers to physical attributes but i also know that it depends on what TYPE means to you as a person, type doesn’t necessarily refer to only physical attributes, for some, type refers to non physical attributes

    A lot of women are caught between marrying their type ( i.e the one that makes them salivate and the one that they are really very attracted to ) and marrying Mr reasonable ( here the attraction is somewhat not as much, age and the fact that the MAN WELL is getting dry by the second usually makes them a logical choice ).

    It is important to see beyond this TYPE thing oh sometimes because you could be overlooking some crucial attributes that could be harmful or helpful.

    All i know is if you are lucky to meet your type who is reasonable you are one of the very very lucky few,

  23. Que

    May 6, 2015 at 5:18 pm

    Haavvvinnggggg been on different ends of the dating spectrum, I can confidently say yes I have constant specs that get my attention everytime, but who I date mustn’t be a certain ‘type’….

    As far as specs I ALWAYS notice a bald headed, white bearded, bow legged, trim framed man above 5ft 8.. (fill in D.B.Woodside with semi scruffy white beards a la lanre olushola…). not particular about complexion…. any combo of the above is welcome…. That said I’ve been in love with an overweight 6ft 2, handsome, k-legged man, and more recently dated a shorter but very fit male for a decent period…. after that rship I understood the value of attraction…. cos he was a decent dude who could move mountains for me, and all I had to offer was some polite/caring/affection…. nothing extra… kinda like brotherly love…

    For me the type is achieved by a mix of the physical attributes and the character… I am very pleased to have decided to give a friend a shot at us dating, before realising he actually grew out white beards, just always shaves it…. I am now actively encouraging the growth….oh, plus he came bow legged and 5ft 9 too…. I cant even complain, I just believe God hears us when we ask.

  24. chi-e-z

    May 6, 2015 at 5:20 pm

    I got a type… Foine with Sense and loves math. lots of money won’t hurt either 😀 oh and insanely fit 4 special purposes 😉

  25. Tejflow

    May 6, 2015 at 5:32 pm

    It’s funny how we are quite firm about having a type when it comes to spiritual or neurological- never mix with unbelievers or he/she has to be godfearing and never marry an AS if you are an AS or never marry an SS but when it comes to physical appearance, we are quick to scoff at people that have specific types.

    Mehn, whatever floats one boat. Whatever makes you orgasm and go creamy. Whatever keeps you from jumping into the next available pants or boxers. Whatever works for your erogenous zones. Whatever makes you want to come home fast from the office or vacation. Whatever will continually appeal to all your 5 senses. Africa really emphasizes on us downplaying physical appearances but many marriages have crumbled as a result.

    I love tall, dark guys with fleshy butts, impressive sense of fashion, nil mouth odor and MUST USE cologne to have a personalized fragrance and i ensured I married one.

    No rigid rules. If that curvy girl or tall guy is what would keep you from checking out your neighbor or spending the whole day in church or office travel, by jove please, the call is yours.

    • SS girl

      May 8, 2015 at 10:20 am

      I’m hoping you meant “never marry an SS if you are AS” but saying never marry a person who has sickle cell disease in general terms would show the kind of person you really are. We are people, humans just like you, not all of us die before 20, some of us actually live normal healthy lives. Some of us also have hopes of being in love, getting married and starting families. Don’t stereotype please. I’m just letting you know. Have a good life.

    • Tami

      May 8, 2015 at 1:49 pm

      I’m not sure you read her comment properly. Try reading again & understanding.

  26. Tejflow

    May 6, 2015 at 5:36 pm

    What i would however not encourage is being fixated on a physical appearance type so bad and negating other bad characters that will cause heartache in the future. But oh yeah, you can get someone you find physically appealing and still meets the spiritual and psychological characters you so crave.

  27. Abena

    May 6, 2015 at 5:37 pm

    Of course I have a type!Everybody has!But hardly do people end up with their types..
    For me if the person is my type and has a nasty character/attitude and does not fear God,then forget it!
    For me types dont count,the man who loves and fears God is my ULTIMATE TYPE..Everything would pale in comparison if he does not meet that criteria…
    However,some girls are soo obsessed and fixated on their types that even when the guy is a douchebag and is killing them,they would stay there and be saying “my type”. RUBBISH!!!

  28. Judith

    May 6, 2015 at 6:03 pm

    I do have a type. Tall, handsome, intelligent. I had to reconsider though when I met my bf cos he was kind, patient and caring but he is short. Lately he has become so insecured, accusses me of cheating with every guy. Whenever we have arguments, he keeps malice with me, until I go ahead and apologise. Some weeks ago he accused me of been with another guy cos I didn’t answer his pings on time. Its over a week and he’s still keeping malice with me. I think some short guys r insecured. By God’s grace, I will meet my type, though I’m really scared to start a new relationship as I’m approaching 30. Its really scary. God have mercy on me.

    • chi-e-z

      May 6, 2015 at 7:19 pm

      short guy syndrome lol i kid… If he starts yelling irrationally or degrading you verbally I’ll take that as a warning flag and might reconsider the relationship but that’s just me. I h8 being yelled @ he should hv football teams to yell and curse @ not me.

    • Shopperoflife

      May 6, 2015 at 8:26 pm

      Run, Run, Run. Soon, Sooner, Soonest you can’t wear high heels, you can’t talk back when his majesty talks at you, yell at you. Then slap, then beatings like celestial drums. If the honeymoon is over before the real biz what is left? Run girl, Run.

    • dee

      May 7, 2015 at 9:10 am

      my dear run; and do it fast!!!!! no excuse

  29. Nwachinemelu

    May 6, 2015 at 8:53 pm

    Wow, an interesting yet fundamental topic! I think we all need to know our type before getting into a relationship or marriage so as to avoid heartbreaks & divorce cases that have plagued our world today. I would want to reflect on this discourse about ‘type’ from 2 dimensions, attractiveness and compatibility. Without boring you with definitions, attractiveness are those physical features of the opposite sex that capture your attention and keep you spellbound & breathless for a moment (lol! at least, I felt that way, I even experienced butterflies in my tummy). Taking a cue from freedictionary.com, Compatibility is the capability of existing or performing in harmonious, agreeable, or congenial combination with another or others.

    For physical attraction, I prefer tall, beautiful, curvy and dark or light ladies while I am better compatible with smart, spiritual, quiet, goodhearted and industrious ladies. We should ensure we have a blend of the 2 to ensure you don’t end up after 3 or more years of relationship with the popular saying ‘we were not compatible’ or ‘we don’t have chemistry between us’.

    In conclusion, I beg to end this write-up with three formulas
    1) Compatibility without attraction equals Good friends
    2) Chemistry without compatibility equals Lust
    3) Chemistry plus compatibility equals Soul mate (love or ‘type’)

    Accept my humble opinion!

  30. Amaka!

    May 6, 2015 at 8:53 pm

    My type: finally evolved from whatever it was to light skinned tall guys.
    Bae: is short,has a lil big ass, nt so cute but he is the best. He is perfect for me,communication is strong as we talk a lot everyday nd sex is cray cray, he makes my legs quake. Funny enough he told me am not his type too but he fell flat for me. We re nt each other’s type but we gel nd thats all that matters.

  31. mauve

    May 6, 2015 at 8:57 pm

    I meet u: U r good looking, taller than me(I have never done short guys), smell nice and dress smartly…I give you my number.
    We talk: you are witty…speak well, funny(make me laff out loud), smart, versatile (knw stuffs mehn)
    We become friends: U love God (Basic!), ur strengths complement my weaknesses and vice versa….You are the man!
    Hubby became the man….lol. He’s not perfect but he made a distinction for my Basic list. I love cupping his face. And his boyish grin makes me smile! Beyond all these, his character made a lasting impression.
    And for real, my taste in guys changed as I got older. Maturity plays a big role.

    • PurpleiciousBabe

      May 7, 2015 at 1:07 pm

      so cute….
      cheesy grin. x

  32. Erinma

    May 7, 2015 at 1:03 am

    My type: Tall(At least 5″10), dark (from dark brown to dark chocolate), good looking(not necessarily ‘pretty boy’ but interesting face, easy on the eyes, nice eyes), articulate (speaks properly, enunciates properly!), intelligent, laid back (isn’t all up in my face and over-possessive, a little possessive is good, but not too much), confident(at ease with himself as a person and as a MAN!), educated, charismatic and a go getter! Only deviated 2 times i think, one was fair, the other slightly shorter than 5″10.

    • Erinma

      May 7, 2015 at 1:06 am

      Oh and physically fit (not Inyanya muscles o! lean, toned, slightly muscled. An athletic build in general)

  33. Uju Lilian

    May 7, 2015 at 7:24 am

    Very interesting writeup. Physical attraction is the begining of a relationship, it takes one who isn’t so into physical attraction to look beyond it and look for the good qualities. Most ladies would say TDH, but their greedy nature would set in if the man is wealthy and the opposite of what they want, they would surely choose wealth. As for me, I like my man, he is dark, handsome and fit enough to protect me. I don’t like thin men.

    • cindy

      May 8, 2015 at 3:38 am

      “Most ladies” ???? Seriously? I’m sorry but I can’t take the rest of your comment seriously.

  34. sussy

    May 7, 2015 at 8:09 am

    My type…also has evolved but I will definitely be attracted to a bald headed guy or a good looking guy, don’t like overtly hairy guys, please be taller than me, am 5″3 so that’s not too much to ask, dress and look good, I love some chemistry too, then if your a good conversationalist and our principles align we are good to go.

  35. sussy

    May 7, 2015 at 8:11 am

    *you are

  36. Jide

    May 7, 2015 at 8:40 am

    nice write up Chima. comments are interesting too…..

  37. JAYNNE

    May 7, 2015 at 9:27 am

    I dont have a type but I find that I have never been attracted to fair guy before, I prefer dark guys

  38. Naked

    May 7, 2015 at 12:33 pm

    Bella i think it’s high time you start a dating forum for those who are interested in hooking up with potential partners and soulmates. You can make it a pay to register dating forum so as to make sure only the serious ones come on.

  39. Yemi

    May 7, 2015 at 4:08 pm

    Are you ready to keep apologising for the rest of your life? Because that’s what you’re setting yourself up for if you continue with this guy and I assure you that things will only get worse. Imagine him accusing you of being with another guy just because you didn’t respond to his pings on time……it will soon graduate to him telling you not to talk to any guy, or to even stop working…..don’t underestimate the length to which an insecure man can go just to keep you under constant check. And any man who keeps malice is immature. It is better you get married at 30 or even older and have your peace of mind, than to settle for an unhappy marriage from the word go. Wishing you all the best!

  40. ceekay

    May 8, 2015 at 8:26 am

    I REALLY like a curvy chick, I mean BIG AFRICAN CURVES type and as soon as I identified this trait, I made up my mind to pursue all the other “godly attributes” plus this very necessary one. The truth is that the most men (a bracket I happen to fall into) are just as controlled physically as they are emotionally, and for this reason, I made a decision to find peace during my marriage by ensuring that I satisfy this desire that first tickles my fancy, and which I know ultimately makes me happy while also pursing all the other necessary godly attributes and companionship needs that most likely would KEEP you happy and YES, I found it!!! So even when I see another chick with same things that attract me, but remember that my partner’s “garrit” as well. I’d find the strength to fight the temptation, and stay less wanting. So YES!!! I think everyone should have a type

    • Sugar

      May 8, 2015 at 3:31 pm

      and some ladies are dying in the gym just to stay slim all because they believe men dont like curvy women. U see what am talking about……………. Be yourself!!!! either slim or curvy, someone out there will love the way you look regardless. Dont skip meals all in a bid to be a size 0

  41. vee

    July 4, 2015 at 9:33 pm

    Fine gentle girl z it for me. She must be confident in herself. Must be able to gist but not talkative . Neatness, yes. There should be flesh in those areas where I can press

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