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Jasmine: Let’s Talk About Sweet Spots & Pet Peeves



dreamstime_l_10695125If you guys watch The Spot on EbonyLife TV, then you know that the show inspired today’s post. Shout out to Zainab, Lamide and Ebuka. Today, I decided to share with you a couple of my sweet spots and pet peeves.

For those, who may not know, a pet peeve may be defined as:
• a particular and often continual annoyance; personal bugbear. (huh? next!)
• something that annoys or bothers a person very much
• something that drives you crazy.( I like this one)

The last two definitions will suit the purpose of this article perfectly.

In contrast, a sweet spot can be described as something you like, love, a favourite thing, something that warms you up on the inside or according to Lamide, something that makes your heart smile. Ah!!! I’m smiling already.

• Babies: I mean, who doesn’t love babies, especially those chubby ones with lots of hair who will just hold onto your finger and not let go, while chuckling happily without a single care in the world. I even catch myself smiling back at a random picture/poster of a laughing child.

• Family – I think family is everything and I particularly love it when the entire clan gathers, usually at Christmas/New year and you get to catch up with cousins you haven’t seen all year long. Also, food is usually in abundance and gist and wine.

• The theme song of Hart of Dixie – Honestly, every time I hear it, I can’t help smiling. By the way, if you like light-hearted, goofy comedy with good country music to boot, you’ll love this series.

• A heavy downpour – Make that a thunder storm. The heavy rains, dark clouds, lots of wind and it’s so cold, you have to dig out your sweater. I love nothing more than lying in bed at those times, warm and snug underneath my duvet with a good book or a movie.

• Blue bunny ice cream – I am trying to eat clean and healthy now so I only treat myself to this once in a while. Maybe, chocolate cake too seeing that I have a sweet tooth and anything that seduces it is a sweet spot.

• The underdog winning- Yes!!!I am always such a sucker for the underdog.

• Chewing gum noisily- Raise that a thousand notches if the offender is a guy. Why would a guy feel the need to snap gum?

• Nigerians do this a lot- A group of people are having a discussion when some members of the group decide to carry on in a language not understood by all present. We particularly like to do this in our native language and I  think this is the height of rude behaviour because it leaves the other party feeling unwelcome and deliberately excluded. The rules of proper etiquette demand that even if you were already discussing before a ‘non – kparakpor’ speaking member joined, in order to not be considered rude or just plain crass, switch to the common language which in this environment would be English. You can always carry on with your conversation some other time or ask to be excused.

• Dirty bathrooms – especially in public places.

• Nails on a black board or any similar screeching sound. That sound tortures my soul.

• Gisting with someone who is distracted for whatever reason. This is super annoying because you’ll end up having to repeat yourself every two sentences. I would usually just be like, you know what, let’s forget it. Let’s just sit and hold hands and hum, or just stare out the window or something…hehe.

• Stupid questions, silly questions – This one, even the Bible doesn’t like. In the book of Proverbs, it says to give a foolish answer to a foolish question. Case in point:
You’re at the cafeteria and a colleague walks in, says hi and then proceeds to ask ‘you’re having lunch’? Mind you, he isn’t blind and as such can clearly see your plate of jollof rice. Suggested Response: No, I’m just counting the grains of rice on my plate. Then proceed to take a heaped spoon and shove it in your mouth, while keeping your unwavering gaze on said offender.

• Show offs: May I just summarise this by reminding us of the idiom that says, ‘empty vessels make the loudest noise’. Modesty is a much more flattering look on anyone.

While writing this, I found that my sweet spots came to me a lot more easily than the pet peeves. Maybe that’s because I’m more of a sweetheart than a sour puss. *smiling sweetly and twirling my skirt*.

I’d love to hear yours, please share in the comments section.

Photo Credit: Dreamstime

Jasmine is a medical doctor and wife who loves to read, surf the web and experience new things. Writing about her observations, thoughts and life experiences is a passion that has led her to maintain a personal blog She would love to someday host her own talk show.


  1. Minty

    January 31, 2016 at 5:54 pm

    Slow walkers, couples with excessive PDA, that noise when the cutlery keeps hitting/scratching a plate when you’re eating, dipping bread in tea(barfs), guys with one long finger nail(usually the pinkie, I swear I don’t get that at all).

    • Cee

      February 1, 2016 at 3:37 am

      We must be related, you and I!

    • Maryjane

      February 1, 2016 at 11:15 am

      I liked this as much as the button would allow!

  2. Becks

    January 31, 2016 at 6:10 pm

    Pet peeves. .you know when someone draws their nose making that irritating sound lol makes me feel like throwing up ..sweet spot beautiful confident but not arrogant women ……like me hehehehehe

  3. A Real Nigerian

    January 31, 2016 at 6:24 pm

    My pet peeve is reading shitty articles like this.

    • Toni

      January 31, 2016 at 7:46 pm

      BN, can you guys ban this troll? This behavior is getting out of hand.

  4. Kanyin

    January 31, 2016 at 6:54 pm

    Jasmine…. You’re such a sweetheart! Loooool @ twirling your skirt. Super cute!

    Sweet spots:
    –Very cold bottle of Coca Cola on a hot afternoon.
    –A hug and a sweet peck on the cheek
    –Your number 4 without the heavy downpour. The weather being cold or a little chilly is just fine.

    Pet peeves.
    –Anything that has bitter leaf in it.
    –Sorry. For the life of me I can’t stand people saying that word especially after I already told you I don’t like something and you still go ahead to do it. Drives me crazy! Why do people think sorry makes everything okay. Just why?!

    • Jasmine

      February 1, 2016 at 9:52 pm

      Thank you *batting eyelashes*

  5. A Real Nigerian

    January 31, 2016 at 6:55 pm

    “Nigerians do this a lot- A group of people are
    having a discussion when some members of the
    group decide to carry on in a language not
    understood by all present. We particularly like
    to do this in our native language and I think this is the height of rude behaviour because it
    leaves the other party feeling unwelcome and
    deliberately excluded.”
    Yes, true. This is what YORUBA people LOVE doing. Loud, noisy and insensitive, always barking their language without invitation. As if it is cool.
    Mannerless f–ks.

    • Cele-Ijesha

      January 31, 2016 at 7:35 pm

      Oti ya wayray.

    • A Real Nigerian

      January 31, 2016 at 7:50 pm


    • Translator

      January 31, 2016 at 10:51 pm

      Rotflmao! @ cele-Iesha
      Simply means “you are mad” @ a real Nigerian.
      Or to translate literally, it means “you have run mad”

  6. Nma

    January 31, 2016 at 7:43 pm

    My sweet pot?

    I love to laugh. Anyone with a good sense of humour is what i live for.

    Plenty plenty Peeves?

    1.People that wrongly use “your” instead of “you’re”. “Theirselves” . This word does not even exist.
    2.”Am” instead of “i’m”. It is “I had begun” and not “i had began”. In general, bad construction of grammar irks me.
    3.Then… “It’s SUPER cool”, “SUPER awesome”. Are you SUPERWO(MAN)???
    4.”2009″ should be pronounced as ” two thousand AND nine”, not “two thousand nine. Lazy people.

    Then somewhere out there…

    When someone asks whether you’re having lunch or about to, and they ask that question?
    It is usually said to break the silence. The following conversation that may precede are as follows; “yeah, just having a bite to eat ,or i’m famished after that boring and tiring project or meeting. An invitation to treat is what i call it.
    Same logic applies to when you wake up in the morning and the first person you meet says, “oh! you’re awake”. It’s more like an invitation to speak on how you slept as opposed to ,”duh, can’t you see i’m awake, idiot”. We have to try and see it as an attempt at being sociable and not a way of introducing sarcasm to counter a simple conversation opener.

    • Kele

      February 2, 2016 at 1:38 pm

      You also have to see the use of the adjective, “super” as an attempt to make an otherwise dull sentence come alive.

      People listed their pet peeve and you want to explain why it shouldn’t be a pet peeve. Is it your own?

  7. Kween

    January 31, 2016 at 7:48 pm

    Sweet Spot – Coming home to ‘Nepa Light’ and not having to deal with noise from generators.

    Pet Peeve- SHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!. I’m watching TV.

  8. Gbogbo Bigz Girlz

    January 31, 2016 at 7:58 pm

    Kindly drop Yoruba from your circle…radarada ti ko se ra aso ni Gbagi.

  9. Mz.Pauline

    January 31, 2016 at 8:04 pm

    Sweet spot: seeing a dude carry/play with kids, cuddle up in bed when it’s raining or very cold watching a nice movie *heaven*
    Pet peeve: use of ‘moi’ in place of ‘my’ when texting, very annoying.

    • Anon

      January 31, 2016 at 9:08 pm

      They are trying to let you know they are bilingual. LOL! Dropping French words every now and then isn’t bad. Au revoir!!

    • Kele

      February 2, 2016 at 1:40 pm

      LOOOL. Anon,

  10. Valentina

    January 31, 2016 at 8:37 pm

    sweet spot -Nepa light, Sweet Passionate love making, cuddling with my boyfriend, being busy and reaping the rewards, having a good laugh at something really funny.
    Pet peeve – someone eating and making irritating sounds or eating and food falling from your plate, laziness, show offs, doing something for someone and telling the whole world about it.

  11. lilz

    January 31, 2016 at 10:01 pm

    oh the heart of Dixie theme song…that i like

  12. sonique

    January 31, 2016 at 10:13 pm

    Pet peeves; I’m doing dishes and someone feels its the best time to wash his/her hands or rinse something. For the love of God, the sink has been free. ..I’m very lazy so when I get started on something, I try to finish hurriedly so that I can rest.
    Sweet spot; random hugs and kisses, breakfast in bed, a cute guy with a cute sense of humour, heavy downpour buh bae must be present*winks*

  13. Nekky

    January 31, 2016 at 10:27 pm

    Sweet spots: Movies and popcorn,free wifi, cute babies with lovely smiles,food?, credit alert, nice smelling and neat dudes, gisting with friends.
    Pet peeves: VPL (Visible Panty Lines) in ladies, smacking lips while sucking candies, bad chewing habit, touching me while talking to me, being kept waiting.

    • Nammy

      February 1, 2016 at 10:13 pm

      I do not like people touching me when talking to me also. I thought it was wierd, but I am glad to know I have a partner.

  14. Cindy

    January 31, 2016 at 11:52 pm

    Soft spots
    Cute babies that don’t throw up on me, preferably between 4-6 months.
    Korean music (kpop) and flower boys
    Teenage romance movies
    Beautiful, cute smile with a good dentition (eji is acceptable – Elijah Wood?)
    Long hair on guys (avan jogia, frank dillane ??)
    British accent from hot guys (Alfred Enoch)
    2nd leads in Korean dramas (always roofing for them)
    Well behaved celebrities (Jacob Latimore, kiss Daniels at least for now)

    Pet peeves (e plenty)
    Naughty crying babies, especially from 7 months?
    Chewing food loudly
    Talking and splashing saliva on me
    Spitting in general (especially those malams and their kelebe)
    Sharing cutlery, cups etc
    Sitting on my bed without wearing panties (life in the hostel?)
    Smelly armpits (I recommend dove)
    Ego the size of mount Everest (applicable to both male and female)
    Bullies (they disgust me, iyama)
    Being touched by anyone and everyone (hubby go try. Where can I get pepper spray for those stupid yaba and aleshinloye boys?)
    Politicians that are always uhhing and ahhing before they pronounce every word
    Dirty sink (Let me be washing plate and come and drop cup in the sink o ? I’m already swearing for your generation in my mind)
    Used sanitary pads *pukes* (can you wrap it in a newspaper and nylon before throwing it out at least?)
    Iru (locust bean)
    Alcohol breath *covers nose*
    Morning after breath (some people will just open there mouth wide first thing in the morning. Am I the only one who is always conscious?)
    Jerry curls (who invented that shit? It irritates the hell out of me)
    Those who sleep through alarms?
    Pencil jeans on guys (awon aburo Wizkid)
    Nose ring on women (just be a bull in your next life)
    Dirty language in general (joro, Lil kesh & co?)
    Omo ita behavior (Olamide & friends)
    Die hard football & political fans
    Car horn (especially those trailers and police trucks)

    That’s all for now, I’ll be back???

  15. jussie wife

    February 1, 2016 at 12:11 am

    Pet peeve!
    1.Fone that annoying accent gals form when talking, that irritating, fake nasal sound gals and sometimes gay boys form in a bid top impress!
    2. Bad grammar, bad English, gbagaun generally. No matter how interesting what you are saying is, the moment I start noticing faults with you accent, diction, grammatical construction, pronunciations etc. I just become distracted and will end up not getting the Point of the whole message.
    3. Uninvited visitors and guests. I will not show up at your party, event or even at your door uninvited please don’t show up at mine uninvited. Know your boundaries and when to leave, say hi and keep it moving. I need to get back to my sleep.

    Sweet spots!
    1. Food; well prepared food.
    2. Sleep; I love my sleep and won’t trade for anything unless totally unavoidable.
    3. Babies
    4. Shoes; heels specifically
    5. Sex; mind blowing, out of the world banging.

  16. jussie wife

    February 1, 2016 at 12:12 am

    * to impress

  17. Honeycrown

    February 1, 2016 at 12:26 am

    Pet peeves:
    Long fingernails on men // Men who wear more jewelry than women & Men with excessive gold on their sunglasses (Jim Iyke’s or Vic O’s type sunglasses).
    People who abbreviate unnecessarily and those who use “AM in place of I’M, YOUR in place of YOU’RE”.
    That clanging sound btw a china plate & metal cutlery when eating.
    Making slurping sounds when sipping hot drinks / slurping hot drinks from a spoon.
    Completely shaving off eyebrows only to draw the brows back on ….. crookedly.
    Chewing gum loudly / Nose picking ….. DISGUSTING!! (wanted to skip this but I can’t)
    Dirty homes esp. Bathrooms and kitchens.
    Flies hovering around a person & they won’t chase them.
    Oblivious ignorant people

  18. Kamkpe Mommy

    February 1, 2016 at 3:29 am

    Sweet Spot: Cold water garri , plenty sugar & groundnullt on a very hot afternoon. Been missing that since Lassa fever alert! Mtcheeew!

  19. love

    February 1, 2016 at 6:35 am

    This article has got me re-analysing my relationship. This guy i started dating recently, he has good character, respectful, responsible and not bad looking. However i find myself turned off by his flaws most of which i realize are my pet peeves – his grammer is bad, with ‘sh’ factor every other minute or one gbagaun except when he is texting, he chews badly like opens his mouth and its just not sightly, he talks too loudly as well when only me n him are in the car he is literally shouting, in fact these things are a big turn off.

    I am tired of correcting him, which he takes in good faith but for how long will i try to change a guy’s habits, a grown man in his 30’s. He is trying to change, he is now concious of ‘sh’ factor though his eating habits still remain. he says when he chews with his mouth closed he bites his gum accidentally, so i had to leave him then.

    I have been contemplating leaving him for these reasons, but then i ask myself if they are really deal-breakers, i don’t know. In other areas he is caring, giving and not selfish. But these flaws keep pulling me back, he is generally not very refined, uncouth i will say but there’s something vulnerable about it which makes me overlook it but then i don’t know how long i can tolerate it.

    I don’t even know if i am settling to be in such a relationship. I just don’t get how a graduate who went to federal schools will have such bad ettiquette. It is well. I haven’t even told my sisters who i am very close to, about him . I just want to be sure before announcing him. Any advice pls?? Thanks

    • Amiee

      February 1, 2016 at 9:22 am

      Why not focus on the good parts of him? You said he is nice, caring and not selfish. For me, these ultimately are the most important characteristics that a significant other should have. Etiquette are things he can learn as time goes on. Ask yourself if you would prefer a person with awesome character but shitty etiquette(that he can learn and improve on) or a person with good etiquette but a shitty character(that is almost impossible for him to change). Your answer should guide you.

    • Faridah

      February 1, 2016 at 9:27 am

      Hey, one day the caterpillar turns into a butterfly.

      It takes longer for some.

      If his values and yours align, if he’s the kind of person who you feel safe with. If he’s willing to learn and improve as we all should, then by all means stay with him.
      You can’t buy honesty and discipline in the market.
      Table manners? You can learn from YouTube.! 🙂

    • bridget

      February 2, 2016 at 11:58 am

      I understand you, but there are more important things in a relationship i think. Except image is a big factor in your list of priorities. Ask yourself will you prefer a guy who is “well packaged” and doesnt treat you the way this guy does? Image can be polished, etiquette can be taught regardless of age. But you can’t change personality

      My 2 cents 🙂 good luck

  20. Onyii

    February 1, 2016 at 8:23 am

    Pet peeves: Adding me to silly groups on Facebook, typing in too many shorthand I have to ask for meanings to read a text, spitting while walking on the road, waiting for me to tell u to “shift” when I enter a bus, chewing gum with an open mouth, a guy thinking/believing he’s smarter than all females and so has to be the ‘teacher’ etc.
    Sweet spots: good music, sleeeeep, fooood.

  21. Netizen

    February 1, 2016 at 10:30 am

    Don’t date someone you’d be embarrassed to be seen with. It causes unintentional relationship problems in the long run.

  22. ramat

    February 1, 2016 at 10:31 am

    Pet Peeves:(i) typing ‘gm’ as ‘good morning’ (ii) Wishing me ‘happy new month’ or sending me ‘happy new month’ messages. Like seriously, why don’t you just go ahead and do ‘happy new day’ and ‘happy new hour’ and ‘happy new second’.

  23. Jean Grey

    February 1, 2016 at 11:27 am

    Sweet spots
    1. Adorable chubby babies!!! especially those with dimples (Baba God, hear my prayer!!!)

    2. Bollywood movie featuring Shahrukh Khan and Kajol, the original Rahul and Anjali (Kuch Kuch Hota Hai and Dilwale Dulhania Le Jayenge will never get old)

    3. The song “Edelweiss” from “The Sound of Music” (best movie song of all times)

    Pet Peeves
    1. Dirty places
    2. Body and mouth odor
    3. Arrogant people

  24. cyndy

    February 1, 2016 at 12:04 pm

    Pet peeves: tapping me while talking. Wtf!
    Guys that can’t speak english, dnt even bother talking to me.
    Calling me on phone every minute.
    Sleep!!!!! How I hate that
    Sweet spots: being stressed esp with a reward.
    Being with friends and family.
    Reading novels nd bellanaija articles.

  25. LEM

    February 1, 2016 at 12:29 pm

    First advice I will give is please do NOT continue this relationship if you are not proud to be seen with him. Yes he has bad etiquette’s, its unfortunate and it will be difficult to change him especially as he is in his 30’s. You have to either accept him as he is and keep making efforts to improve him or move on. Its that simple. Have seen ladies especially ‘manage’ guys they are not really proud of and have serious issues in their relationships all because of the pressure to get married. Its not worth it please, for your sake and his.

  26. DD

    February 1, 2016 at 1:39 pm

    Pet peeve ; – Females digging their nose, as if they have gold dug deep in their noses or men digging and then using there trousers or cloth to clean the dugged fingers on themselves.
    – Public toilets….. even if i’m so pressed.. i’ll rather run into the bush and dispose some fresh manure to the plant, than to spread my legs and get itchy due to toilet infections…. and if i have to , know that it will either be.. a serious /major situation…lol
    – Using the toilet not washing them and then having the audacity to shake people * Vile*
    -chipped nail polish….. its half way gone, take a scraper and scrap the rest now or go an apply more nail polish to your nails na.!!
    – watching a movie and then asking me if the actor or a character will die in the movie or what i think will happen next.. when i’m not the director neither am i the exec producer… –
    Proud and arrogant for nothing type of people
    Atheist – even when there are signs and ways that tells them GOD exist, they still want to be ignorant
    sweet pots
    – chubby kids with bow legs
    Dresses that have pockets
    God fearing family that praticalises on how God loved the church and still dominating in every aspect of life that they work in

    • Jasmine

      February 1, 2016 at 9:49 pm

      Chubby kids with bow legs? lol… that’s cute.

  27. Bev

    February 1, 2016 at 2:04 pm

    A dog licking my hand with that slimy tongue,Jizoz, I hate it. Gives me the hives. I love cream&cookies ice cream. Just thinking about it makes me smile.

  28. sammiewolf

    February 2, 2016 at 11:04 am

    1. you’re definitely Igbo and you live in a Yoruba state…no need to get a soothe-sayer
    2. Yorubas suffer the same fate in Igbo states…its bad, we all know
    3. you really should examine yourself for the definition of TRIBALISM…we’re talking about bad habits not bad tribes…and if there were any bad tribes…that will be whatever tribe you belong!

  29. Kele

    February 2, 2016 at 1:50 pm

    I agree with some of yours.

    I can NOT stand jheri curls myself and It’s irritating when people blare their horns anyhow. Gotdamn. It makes me want to pull my hair out.

  30. Kele

    February 2, 2016 at 2:01 pm

    my sweet spots.
    the smell of freshly washed bedsheets and towels. (It has to dry out in the sun for this uplifting smell to exist).
    Food cooked by someone else.
    Red wine
    Colourful mens’ socks
    Babies and toddlers (they just make me smile)
    the smell of rain.
    scented candles

    Pet Peeves:
    noisy eating.
    that screeching noise cutlery makes when it comes in contact with plate
    People who use “on” wrongly. “lady on blue dress” “nose ring on girls”. I always want to ask if these things are literally suspended above the person in mid-air
    people who nag and bodybite.
    the act of over-promise & under-deliver.

    that’s all I can remember jare.

  31. kayjay

    February 2, 2016 at 11:47 pm

    Pet peeves- foot prints on the tiles
    Spelling my name wrongly
    Insinuating I’m gay because I don’t like football
    Ass grabbing in public (get a room people)
    Sweet spots – Beyoncé
    A nice bath

  32. Free Spirit

    February 3, 2016 at 8:54 pm

    Pet peeves: Dingy places, hearing grammatically wrong sentences, noisy churches, all forms of body odour, ass lickers, snobs who genuinely have no reason to snob others.

    Sweet spots: Family, le boo, cute babies, traditional Catholic hymns (heavenly), praying in the chapel, cold rainy mornings spent under my duvet watching movies, cooking gourmet meals, sleeping, reading novels in bed

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