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For Oluwasanumi! Read A BN Reader’s Poignant Story of the Tragic Experience of Losing Her Pregnancy

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A BN reader and contributor sent this email to us last week. She asked for it to be published anonymously in order to protect members of her family. We found her story really inspiring and we hope that you learn a thing or two from her experience.
***

“It’s easy to believe when sorrow never comes your way” ~ Crystal Lewis (Someday – Kingdom Come)

“Madam, the baby is not doing fine” I heard the lab doctor say to me as I was about tying my ‘oleku’ wrapper. I replied, “How come? I’ve not stressed myself since I got pregnant o! But then I just thought to myself, “No wahala, I’ll get bed rest then.”

“Madam, I’m afraid you’ll have to go for an evacuation as soon as possible.” He looked at my puzzled face and explained “I mean an evacuation, a D& C”.

I felt like I had just been slapped by 10 demons at the same time. The wrapper I just tied properly some seconds ago mysteriously fell to the floor, I was shaking like a wet leaf. God! Where do I start from? Tell me this isn’t true God.

My husband’s call jolted me back to reality. He had driven me to the lab and was waiting for me downstairs. “Baby, how was the scan? When will you be through?” I could only mutter “Booboo, come upstairs. They said the baby is not fine.”
***
I got married to my husband and best friend January 2013. Before we got married, we had discussed when to have kids. Hubby wanted us to wait a year so as to allow us bond properly before having the ‘intruders’, and also to save well enough to cater for the child. I had disagreed vehemently – with no cogent reason of course. I just wanted us to have a child right away. He eventually agreed with me.

About a month after we got married, I realized I was pregnant. My husband was ecstatic. I remember him saying “thank you for making me a father.” I had relocated from the United Kingdom to be with my husband in Nigeria, so he advised I suspended my job search till after the first trimester since I’d gotten pregnant immediately. Besides, I wasn’t even in the right shape to start job searching; I was having the worst of first trimester illnesses.

I told my husband I wanted to name our baby “Oluwasanumi” (God showed me mercy) and he said he had no problem with the name.
***
Oluwasanumi, I connected with you right from the first day I felt you inside of me. I would pray for you every morning and night, I pleaded with you not to give me too much trouble and that mummy was losing weight because she wasn’t eating – no thanks to you. The first three months were hell Oluwasanumi. I was practically useless in the house. I looked forward to having you and telling you what you put me through.

Your daddy was more than supportive. He would buy food on his way home from work because I couldn’t cook, help out with cleaning, feed the dog and a whole lot more. The aroma of food was like death and poison to me.

Your grandma was more than excited when she heard I was expecting; this was going to be her first grandchild. She prayed for me and told me to keep the news to myself until my tummy began to bulge.

***
By the 12th week, I started feeling ‘normal’. Normal in the sense that my appetite resumed suddenly, my breasts were no longer painful and had stopped growing. I complained to my husband and he jokingly said “so the breasts will be growing everyday ba? Do you have any idea how they’ll look in 9months? Shior!
I didn’t want to sound like a hypochondriac so I didn’t push further. Then the brownish discharge followed, then the cramps…….then I began to panic.

I spoke with an elderly obstetrician I once met and he sent me in for a scan immediately. Then I was informed my Oluwasanumi wasn’t ‘doing fine’.

***
By the time my husband came upstairs, I had cried a bucket. I was told I had a missed abortion. It is sometimes called ‘Silent miscarriage’. The mother of such foetus has no clue until after a few weeks. The lab attendants were all telling me to take heart and that God had a reason for allowing such to happen. I just couldn’t comprehend that. I was inconsolable. My husband was devastated.

The following morning, hubby and I went to your grandma’s house to inform her of the latest development. She advised we go for an evacuation immediately. I wasn’t even prepared for that. My husband and I followed her to the family hospital like zombies.

***

“Please is it possible you sedate me?” I asked the doctor as he was about to perform the evacuation/abortion. “I’ll definitely do that OK?” The doctor responded.
After a couple of seconds, I blacked out.

I’ll not go into the nightmare I experienced during my blackout. Who makes those anesthesias for D&Cs though? Why couldn’t I just sleep.

***
I woke up after what seemed like eternity with my husband cuddling me and my Mum praying. Then it dawned on me that I had finally lost you Oluwasanumi.

I was later told you died because you didn’t form properly and my body expelled you afterwards. I was told not to worry and that I would conceive again very soon. I was also told you were ‘just 12weeks’ and couldn’t really have been called a baby.

Really? Seriously? They had no idea what you meant to me. You’ll always remain my first child. Your gender hadn’t been revealed to me yet but I connected with you Oluwasanumi. I loved you, I spoke to you and I felt you heard me.

I almost lost faith in God but I’m thankful for the good people that stood by me. It was a tough road and sure, I still cry once in a while each time I remember you Oluwasanumi.

My next child will be named Oluwasanumi because I’m certain God will still show me mercy.

To that person who just went through a miscarriage or who’s walked that road before, I do pray God consoles you.

Photo Credit: madamenoire.com

88 Comments

  1. Nne Somebody

    March 10, 2014 at 2:11 pm

    God will indeed show His mercy in your life. I’ve been there and know exactly how you must feel. I had the scan repeated, hoping it would tell me something different. They told us the baby probably had a genetic deformity and I should be grateful. I am still waiting to find the praise for losing the child but I have accepted. Sending hugs and kisses your way.

  2. Dessy

    March 10, 2014 at 2:21 pm

    Hmmn. I can imagine the pain. Even if the fetus is just a week old, the pain is like that of loosing a full grown child. As a doctor, I cry with my some of my patients . Only God can truly console you. Endeavor to find out what led to the sad event. Don,t relent in prayers too. Feel free to mourn Oluwasanumi and seek as much emotional support as you need. I pray this affliction will not arise again in Jesus name . Amen

  3. Bee

    March 10, 2014 at 2:24 pm

    May God console you. God sure does answer prayers He has his reason for every single thing.

  4. no heart to hate

    March 10, 2014 at 2:27 pm

    It is well

  5. Oyinade

    March 10, 2014 at 2:29 pm

    So sad. I can’t imagine your pain. I also got pregnant around the time you did and had a baby boy in October and I remember all the fears I had during my pregnancy about losing my baby. May God comfort you and give you many children to give you joy.

  6. Mariaah

    March 10, 2014 at 2:34 pm

    Hugs and kisses to “Mummy Oluwasanumi”.. God will bestow Joy and show you Mercy once again. He did it the first time, he do it again and again and bring it to perfection. 🙂

  7. obi

    March 10, 2014 at 2:34 pm

    Im so sorry about your loss. I experienced same last year when I lost my 27 weeks pregnancy, a son I already named King David. I was devastated but never lost my faith in God. God will comfort you and your hubby and bless you again and again and again in Jesus Name Amen!!

  8. maryam

    March 10, 2014 at 2:36 pm

    Cried all through, can definately relate with this post. Went through something similar 4years ago (still born) and i still cant forget! May God bless you another, they say another one will ease the pain. Cant wait for this pain to stop………..

  9. mia

    March 10, 2014 at 2:41 pm

    i can totally imagine how you must have felt after going through that terrible first trimester experience and later losing the baby. it must have been a trying time for you. i pray that the God of all comfort will comfort you with His comfort so you can comfort others with the comfort from which you have been comforted.

    i said a prayer for you now, the Lord will replace this loss with a lovely bundle of joy, very soon.

  10. Dede

    March 10, 2014 at 2:43 pm

    We (hubby and I) called ours Kekeli. Losing a pregnancy is such a terrible experience no one must go through. But GOD has been faithful, 31st Dec 2011 he gave me this verse, Isaiah 65:17 (For, behold, I create new heavens and a new earth: and the former shall not be remembered, nor come into mind) Nine month later, he created a new heaven, he gave us Elikplim, (God is with me). A lovely baby boy. God is faithful!, again I say he is faithful my sister, take heart.

    • PurpleiciousBabw

      May 15, 2014 at 9:57 pm

      Awesome testimony…
      So shall it be for you Mama oluwasanumi. xxx
      Hugs.x

  11. yinka

    March 10, 2014 at 2:44 pm

    God will replenish all you lost tripple fold..Take heart, sister

  12. DORYS

    March 10, 2014 at 2:45 pm

    IT IS WELL MY DEAR, SO LONG AS YOU CONCEIVED BEFORE, YOU WILL SURELY DO AGAIN IN JESUS NAME.GOD WILL GIVE YOU DOUBLE FOR YOUR TROUBLE AND YOU WILL REJOICE, CELEBRATE AND PRAISE THE NAME OF THE LORD

  13. Autoprincess

    March 10, 2014 at 2:47 pm

    God is your comforter my sister. I pray with you this day that ‘Tumininu’ will not tarry, ‘Tumininu’ will soon join you and this time around, you will hold him/her in your arms.
    This brought tears to my eyes as I remembered my first pregnancy, eight months old, lost just like that. You can imagine, having to go through labour for a child that you already is not alive. But like you said, God will definitely have mercy AGAIN and AGAIN and AGAIN. Now, I see my 5year old and I just thank God for wiping my tears.

  14. Nonnie

    March 10, 2014 at 2:47 pm

    i had an ectopic pregnancy, i still think about what if,

  15. FunkyW

    March 10, 2014 at 2:51 pm

    Sorry for the experience. Wish the family Lord’s Strength and Grace to bear it all #BigHug

  16. Modoluwamu

    March 10, 2014 at 2:52 pm

    Humm I still cant forget how happy I was when I felt I was even pregnant….. I didn’t even mind all the pain and stress I went through. Loosing the baby 2 months after was a moment of sorrow but I studied the word and I understood that we are only caretakers of these children on earth and he willdefinitely allow us fulfill our destiny as women. I hold onto Exodus23:25 and I believe and I know soon people will rejoice with us. Amen

  17. Bleed Blue

    March 10, 2014 at 2:53 pm

    I have been there 3 times. The 2nd and 3rd time were more physically and emotionally painful than the former. That will never be your portion in Jesus name! But what I want to I tell you is this, when the blessing comes to full fruition, and you’re holding that beautiful child in your arms, your previous tears will seem like a distant dream.

    Hugs and God’s blessing to you dear. Keep your head up.

    • chat

      March 10, 2014 at 3:03 pm

      I just thank God. Mine is worst for over a year now i have not seen my period am now tired of going the doctor, dnt kn whether i will ever get pregnant.

    • Blessed

      March 10, 2014 at 3:34 pm

      How can you say that? How can you think that of yourself?
      Being alive to type this is a miracle itself. Do you think you wake up daily by your own power? If God can miraculously keep you till this day, if He can wake you up daily for your ….years on earth, if He can do it for others, If He can do it for Hannah, if He can do it for Zechariah who was already old and well stricken in age without any hope (and you are just 30smth) what makes you think that about yourself?

      As a man thinketh in his heart, so he is. Let your words change from today, You will!

  18. Teletubby

    March 10, 2014 at 2:57 pm

    God will comfort you dear sister,i have bn dere…i cried my eyes out especially when i was bn led to the theatre for evacuation..that was september 2012…i took in in November and i didnt know until January 2013…My Adorable baby came july …
    God will do it before you know it.Amen

  19. chat

    March 10, 2014 at 3:01 pm

    I just thank God. Mine is worst for over a year now i have not seen my period am now tired of going the doctor, dnt kn whether i will ever get pregnant.

  20. Evans

    March 10, 2014 at 3:04 pm

    One really can’t understand except you’ve been there. For those of us who are looking up to God for the fruit of the womb, i know how deeply i desire it and how i can’t pray about it without bursting out in tears not to talk of losing a baby you’ve already loved. My prayer is that God will show you mercy and replace your tears with joy. Affliction shall definitely not rise up a second time in your life IJN.

  21. Dr. N

    March 10, 2014 at 3:10 pm

    So sad. May your joy be restored

  22. Esther

    March 10, 2014 at 3:10 pm

    Your story brought tears to my eyes. I cant say i understand how you feel but I know that the pain will eventually pass and according to your faith, God will show you mercy. Meanwhile, you and hubby just be there for each other. *hugs*

  23. Blessmyheart

    March 10, 2014 at 3:20 pm

    God will indeed have mercy on you. He will comfort you and replenish you. He will give you the joy that will make you forget previous sorrows in Jesus name.

  24. Chinyerem

    March 10, 2014 at 3:28 pm

    I have been there,It was just a few weeks,but I could tell it is a boy and I feel sober when I see kids that should have been his age,I call him Pharez(from the biblical Meaning-breaking forth). May God give us the grace to move on and.

  25. @edDREAMZ

    March 10, 2014 at 3:30 pm

    Is really painfull, may God give yu what yu have lost in hundred folds…
    .
    .
    .
    ***CURRENTLY IN JUPITER***

  26. Blarney

    March 10, 2014 at 3:36 pm

    Hmm, may God console you. I have been there. It was so painful that I thought God has stopped answering prayers. After the first scan and I was told the babies have stopped growing,my sister, I prayed,I prayed, I did night vigils but still there was no changes. I went through evacuation which was the worst experience of my life. After 2weeks I started bleeding, I almost lost my life. But when I look back,I still have every reason to thank God for life and for not allowing me to have deformed babies. In everything give thanks. God will give you a more beautiful child,just believe and trust Him. Cheers!

  27. I Will Remain Anonymous This One Time...

    March 10, 2014 at 3:36 pm

    Reading this brought back a rush of memories. No woman should ever have to go through the painful loss of losing a child and it doesn’t matter if it’s just one day or a week or nine months old, once you know about another living being forming inside of you, the child becomes real to you. Dear BN Reader, I can almost feel your pain too ( I say almost because I know no two losses can ever be the same no matter how similar the circumstances are- we experience loss differently) cos I also lost my beautiful baby at almost 15 weeks on Friday 13 July. It’s almost two years now but I still cannot forget or the horror of that day as I picked up my baby that had slipped out of me and wrapped in a white face towel… May the Lord comfort you and ease your pains… With time, the pain will reduce but it never really goes away as one never really forgets…

    • TITO

      March 12, 2014 at 3:19 pm

      OMG! OMG! This scared the hell out of me. I am pregnant. OMG!

    • [email protected]

      March 13, 2014 at 5:48 pm

      Do not fret Tito your case would be different in Jesus name. sending you hugs and i’d pray for you

  28. chubaz

    March 10, 2014 at 3:49 pm

    Really felt her pain.. there are lots of ladies that need to read this Article.. Absolutely inspirational

  29. her royal majesty

    March 10, 2014 at 3:51 pm

    Affliction shall never arise the second time…may the LORD comfort and restore you, May HE bless you with children that will wipe away your tears!!! IN THE NAME OF JESUS AMEN………

  30. DJ STELCH

    March 10, 2014 at 3:51 pm

    I’m Stunned!! So This Is What Women Who Lose There Babies Go Through?? Jeeeeez.. (OLUWASANUMI).. Take Heart Darline, guess the baby was meant to make way’s for others to come in and dwell. You’ll Smile Again.. Please Let Us Know When You Deliver Cause You WILL.. I Hope To Come For Your Naming Ceremony..

  31. Ayobami

    March 10, 2014 at 3:53 pm

    Tears may endure for a night but joy comes in the morning.Mummy Oluwasanumi, the morning is going to come soonest and the joy will be permanent IJN.

  32. CAROL

    March 10, 2014 at 3:54 pm

    its like waking up from a nightmare but relity still stares at you every turn. mine was a baby gal, she wasa lil baby gal at 5months 3 weeks 4 days. i still find it hard to believe i have good and bad days but thanks to my my hubby n my boys i see God’s comfort thru them. I ts never easy and i will also pray for you

  33. Mz Socially Awkward...

    March 10, 2014 at 4:00 pm

    This is so very sad. A friend of ours had her baby, full term and he died immediately after. She’d been told there were complications with the foetus and was praying and praying and praying for everything to turn around. It didn’t and she was devastated.

    I can’t imagine the feeling of carrying life within you and looking forward expectedly to meeting your baby, only for something you couldn’t control to take the life away from you. I really pray you all receive your long-awaited joy that wipes away the tears you’ve shed.

  34. Babytohcute

    March 10, 2014 at 4:05 pm

    Amen. You can conceive and you’ll conceive again. You’ll hold your babies and watch them grow as long as The Lord tarries. It is well with you and all pregnant women, even those who are yet to be.

  35. anonymous

    March 10, 2014 at 4:08 pm

    My dear, Oluwasanumi will come back to you in a better and healthier form and you shall both share joyous moments together with more siblings. I have been trying since 2012 and when I thought it was finally growing in me after missing my period for close to 2 weeks and having my boobies grow two times bigger,I was telling my lil one that we’re gonna have so much fun together and I’ll show her what life is and teach her everything cuz she’ll be my baby n I’ll be her mama for lyf. U can imagine waking up and seeing that first brown spotting then the cramps that followed. A doctor says I’m having missed miscarriages that I may not even know I’m preggos yet and have my period without knowing it’s a miscarriage. How harder can it get? Yet each month,I don’t wanna lose hope. At chat,please don’t think you can’t ever get pregnant. You will get pregnant and hold your babies in your arms and nuture them plus your grandchildren n greatgrandchildren sef. I have learned from experts that those babies lost will have come out deformed so losing them is a mercy too. I wanna name mine Oluwatamilore and I know she’ll be with me soon by His will. Lose hope not my sisters,whatever He wills,is a mercy upon us.

  36. anon

    March 10, 2014 at 4:13 pm

    God will bless and strengthen you and give you beauty for ashes. It sounds so cliche, but his ways are not our ways. I cannot understand or fathom why he allows such things to happen, but I am assured he works all things out for our good. Its not over. When God is in it all things are new

  37. Me

    March 10, 2014 at 4:27 pm

    God only will comfort you my sister, some of us have been waiting on The Lord for 3 long years and with everyday that pass by, you don’t know how else to remind God of it. Worst still, you see the people that got married the same time with you inviting you for dedication and you can’t just stop asking God why me? What have I done? Who have I offended? You even wish to be pregnant and hear the doctor say to you that they need to evacuate. The tears just won’t stop flowing as I type this but I know that God will fulfill his promises to each and everyone believing him and to you my dear, same way you will come and testify on BN
    Stay strong!!!

  38. Ose

    March 10, 2014 at 4:38 pm

    my bestie lost my godson….(her baby)… my lammy last year. dis story brings tears to my eyes cos it reminds me of him. i pray that no one goes through such pain…it is well

  39. chichi

    March 10, 2014 at 4:41 pm

    HMMMMMMMMMMN! Dats all i can do now……………………………. sigh! GOD will definitely show u Mercy

  40. TS

    March 10, 2014 at 6:41 pm

    Very touching. I pray God blesses comforts you and blesses your family with many more healthy babies.

  41. SoChi

    March 10, 2014 at 6:52 pm

    May God comfort you and all the parents that have felt such a loss. My prayers are with you. To the ladies that are waiting on God, He will do it for you at the right time ok. Please just hold on. Let pressure and nay sayers not get you down. When people talk in your ear say, He has done it already. I know it is hard to confess it and not see it but God is so faithful.

  42. olori Tari

    March 10, 2014 at 8:25 pm

    Sending all the comfort and strength you need your way. .Hang in there hun…The Lord is going to perfect all that concerns you. How I wish you can name the next beauty coming your way, my favourite yoruba name. “OMOITUNU”…It means Child of Comfort and indeed, the next child is going to be a child of utmost comfort for you and your family.

  43. olajumoke

    March 10, 2014 at 8:29 pm

    Your story is very similar to mine, very identical in fact! I am still hoping fora child after 5 years but i know God has spoken, he will do it.. I also started writing a book called Child of Mercy, collecting stories ike this and how they overcame. We shall overcome my dear, sooner than we think.

  44. Toluwalope

    March 10, 2014 at 8:59 pm

    The Lord will comfort you and reward with twins….

  45. LOLS

    March 10, 2014 at 9:53 pm

    The Lord will surely show you mercy…

  46. bisolar

    March 10, 2014 at 11:38 pm

    Have faith dear that God has not forgotten ypu amd that his thoughts of u are of good and not of evill to bring you to an expected end.You will be a mother again in Jesus Name and Holy spirit will comfort you.When the next pregnancy comes,dont even tell anybody except your husband.

  47. Eve82

    March 11, 2014 at 4:39 am

    May God comfort you and all those in similar positions. I know the God I serve, He will fulfill His promises.

  48. Omotè

    March 11, 2014 at 8:17 am

    We’ve been told to keep it quiet, no one has to know, it wasn’t really a baby, why are you crying, there’s nothing I didn’t hear. I don’t think I had ever heard of a silent miscarriage before then. Got married April 2013, got pregnant in May and was so excited, had names picked out already. By the 9th week, there was no nausea, I had stopped feeling pregnant and then came the cramps, it was devastating. I walked around totally unaware of my surrounings. I would be in church and breakdown, I see a pregnant woman in the market and look at her longingly for what I had lost, I would see a pregnant friend who we got married at about the same time and be depressed all day. It took me 2 weeks to go for an evacuation, I kept hoping, nearly fought with the radiographer for telling me I needed to go for an evacuation as soon as possible.
    I did go eventually in July and locked myself up for almost 2 months, not wanting to see anyone. Took a while but I got better. Now we are trying again and the end of every cycle is tormenting. My husband has been my rock. Comforting and trying not to look worried for my sake. They say our worrying and fretting adds to the delay but how exactly do you stop worrying? Joining you and everyone out there who has been through this in hoping and praying that God gives us a reason to smile, a reason to dance with reckless abandon and a reason to say ‘ Oluwasanumi!’

    • Bleed Blue

      March 11, 2014 at 12:15 pm

      Dear Omote, I hope you come back to read this.

      I can totally attest to the fact that the worrying only makes things worse. My GP told me anxiety and nervousness affect hormonal imbalances…also when I did get pregnant after my 1st MC, I suspect I worried myself to my 2nd MC, and then same for the 3rd. So…I literally ignored my reproductive system and left it in God’s hands…cliche as that might sound it’s very true. I just focused on other things and didn’t even realise when I got pregnant again…at a time when I didn’t want to as I was just about to move to a new job.

      I sha moved on with life and went on holiday, started my new job and just continued living fully, cognisant of the baby in me but not letting pregnancy (or the fear of losing it) rule my life. And then the days rolled into weeks and then into months and then my beautiful boy showed up.

      Please dear, it’s really hard but make that conscious effort to stop worrying. Enjoy your wonderful husband, get more involved with an activity you like, just try to occupy yourself as much as possible. And come back and give us your testimony.

      I will include you in my fervent prayers tonight. God bless you mucho!

    • Omotè

      March 11, 2014 at 7:44 pm

      Thank you soooo much Blue!

    • Bleed Blue

      March 12, 2014 at 2:16 pm

      You’re very welcome dear…so glad you came back to read this. Hugs and more hugs!

    • Tp

      March 12, 2014 at 12:42 am

      God would make u a mum really soon! Speaking from experience, carried my baby girl for the whole nine months ,frequent vomiting,weightloss etc. I just wanted her to come cos it was worth it but she died at birth,placenta complications! My baby girl,no1 told me till 3days after cos I almost died. Fast forward to 7mnths after I became pregnant and had threatened abortion and almost lost my boy but there is a GOd after all! My boy is 8months now and even though it stills hurts when I remember her ,I feel better cos I ve gotmy son. Don’t worry God would comfort and strengthen you

  49. pazzy

    March 11, 2014 at 9:32 am

    sorry dear.. i really feel for u.. God will favour u with ur own baby.

  50. Stephanie

    March 11, 2014 at 10:08 am

    Amen may God console you tooo…sorry for the loss
    blogsvila.blogspot.com

  51. ivy

    March 11, 2014 at 10:13 am

    d GOD that gives will surely open door of twins for u. i went through that path four yrs ago ,its a painful moment .

  52. Beautiful

    March 11, 2014 at 10:21 am

    I totally relate with this story,had a [email protected],I was broken and lost..But God is always faithful,2 months later am carrying a beautiful child inside mi,am 13weeks old and I constantly pray for God to keep this child.For every woman thats going through any pains,the good lord with comfort you!!!

  53. C*Witty

    March 11, 2014 at 11:14 am

    thanks BN for sharing this challenge so she keeps faith in God and doesn’t blame herself as she has seen/learnt its happened to other strong women and how they struggled to survive the loose. i pray God and loved ones comforts her and she finds the strength to survive her loose and have more babies. its always a good idea to share what challenges we face because trust me you are not being fair to yourself to think yours is the worst until you hear the next person’s story.

  54. Yinka Ademola

    March 11, 2014 at 12:26 pm

    I can relate. Let us look beyond the pain and thank God for another chance. As long as one is alive there is always another chance…

  55. fred

    March 11, 2014 at 1:12 pm

    I went through this kind of challenge. I was 8weeks gone I noticed I was always feeling weak, my stomach pained me that I couldn’t touch it. One evening my hubby took me to the hospital, I was told to go for scan the scan suggested D&c I came back to the hospital that same day the doctor told me had to evacuate & wash my stomach. I asked if it would be painful the nurses said no. I went into the theatre as the process started I screamed like hell it was so painful. My hubby couldn’t stand me screaming. Weeks later I bled like I was going to loose it. Now am 3months pregnant. Just my hubby & my sister are aware until It becomes obvious.
    Speak in tongues fervently. The word works!

  56. nwanyi na aga aga

    March 11, 2014 at 1:43 pm

    The Lord himself will wipe your tears Mummy Oluwasanumi, Your mouth will be filled with laughter and it would be said of you, that the Lord himself has done great things for you. Take heart dear. the Lord himself will give you another child.

  57. Lady

    March 11, 2014 at 2:36 pm

    It is well. I feel ur pain, cos i have walked that path. I had a miscarriage at 17 weeks after i had gone through a horrific period and was just getting to look pretty, make my hair and all that. I was broken. I had named the baby Oluwatamilore. Dear Lord, please return Sanumi to her and Tamilore to me. Our hope is in You……….

  58. Berry Dakara

    March 11, 2014 at 2:40 pm

    Wow. I’m really sorry that you had to go through that. The more I hear stories like these, the more fearful I am of pregnancy 🙁

    • Omotè

      March 11, 2014 at 7:53 pm

      There’s nothing to fear Berry. It’s a beautiful thing! Nothing beats the joy of finding out that you are gonna have a ‘mini-you’.

  59. divadivine

    March 11, 2014 at 2:43 pm

    God will answer u

  60. Kate

    March 11, 2014 at 4:25 pm

    I have worked dis path before, and I know how it feels. even after 3 years am still hoping and praying for my miracle! My heart is with you and every other woman going thru same one way or another. God will surely keep His words in our lives “there shall not be any barren in thy land” take heart for He is a faithful God!

  61. Kate

    March 11, 2014 at 4:27 pm

    Sorry walked

  62. cannime

    March 11, 2014 at 4:53 pm

    The best is around the corner. I trust God 🙂

  63. always happy

    March 11, 2014 at 6:27 pm

    There are no words that can soothe your soul like God’s truth and the one i’d like you to remember and edge on lips on good days, bad days, awful days are ” I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made! , and so it shall be! Amen

  64. Opeyemi

    March 11, 2014 at 7:41 pm

    Sigh… May God comfort you and make you a mum soon! Strength through these times for you and your entire family!

  65. Mama ibeju

    March 12, 2014 at 11:25 am

    My dear, I can relate with your story. My hubby and I called ours Ekundayo. Ekundayo would have been 17 years old. It was devastating. I have not got over it but I am a proud mum of 4 wonderful kids. Two of whom are twin boys, Oluwa soro mi DAyo indeed. On his birthday I am always moody but I still thank God for turning my sorrow to joy. Trust me when I say you will come back here to testify. Be strong and let the joy of The Lord forever strengthen you….

  66. Osie

    March 13, 2014 at 6:05 pm

    I’m so sorry for your loss dear writer, I dare say I understand how you feel. Because i lost my little one too. I can totally relate to that instant connection you felt immediately you knew he/she was growing inside of you. You see, my hubby and I were the couple who wanted to start a family right from our wedding night. But fast forward three years and it hadn’ t happened. Then in the month of our 3rd wedding anniv, I conceived for the 1st time in my life! We were overjoyed to say the least. 11 weeks passed with the attendant hassles but who cared? Our little one was more than worth it and to God i was eternally grateful for giving him/her to us, still am. Then one day, the spotting started, cramps followed, went to the hosp, did a scan. “Sir pls is everything alright in there?” i asked the lab attendant. ” No o”, he replied. “Your doc will explain the situation to you”. We had lost our baby, just like that. I was given some meds to help evacuate cos my hubby for some reason was averse to the D&C method. That night, the cramps intensified and i had an urge, ran to the bathroom and out slipped our beloved child. Our hearts broke in many pieces. Will we ever smile again? Those were very dark days, intense sorrow. But alas, God Himself was our upholder. Because it had to be only the Almighty that rescued us from despair. It’s been four months since my miscarriage but today i smile again knowing that the Lord will do it again, and again and again(cos i want 3 kids…lol) and these times, it will be permanent. So dear sis, hang on and take solace in God. The sun will shine again and you will laugh again.

  67. Simi

    March 26, 2014 at 11:27 am

    I normally would not comment on blogs but this story struck so close to home and I thought the more people who have gone through same comment, maybe some hope will be given to someone.
    It was called a “missed miscarriage” to me. I was 13 weeks and 2 days, my little angel measured about 12 weeks with no heart beat. The guy who did the scan was so cold.
    I also looked longingly at every pregnant woman. When I see kids the same age as the child I lost, it broke my heart.
    I cried in church, cried in the car, cried at work, cried at namings, cried at child dedications. It was the worst nightmare. And sincerely no one understood. Even my hubby. Infact a nurse at the hospital said “You and your husband are still young”. Is that a consolation?
    Nine months later, totally unplanned and without any effort I got pregnant again. I fell ill, I cramped, I bled, I passed tissue. But I have a wonderful, bubbly, supersmart and healthy 10 month old baby girl , My OLUWAREMILEKUN from that pregnancy. I mean all the signs to lose a baby were there, but she stayed. And she is absolutely healthy and smart.
    Lesson learnt, I thank God for that experience, I can never take a child, pregnancy or child birth for granted. Now I know the meaning of “Eeku ewu omo”. It really isn’t easy and it isn’t by our grace or doing.

  68. My August baby that wasn't

    March 28, 2014 at 11:43 am

    Trust in God and believe he will never give you more than you can handle. Each situation should be an experience for the future. Always remember what you are not alone.
    Days you want to cry, cry without holding back. I always plan and follow my plans, got married waited 3 months conceived, had an easy pregnancy and a wonderful boy. Planned for baby 2 after a job change when that didn’t come we conceived and by Jan. 2013 at 6weeks there was no heartbeat. Waited 2 weeks – scans every week nothing. Was given meds, started bleeding in the car on the way home (so driver, nanny etc. knew) expelled most out that day but for 2 weeks sac refused to be expelled then I had to have an evacuation. So imagine the horror!! Fast forward from Feb 2013 – Dec 2013 – no period!! Was like my body was in shock refusing to press “play” again. All sorts of hormonal drugs and scans were done yet nothing. I decided to live my life, not worrying instead enjoying the period free moments. Finally agreed for another procedure even though in my heart I didn’t believe in it, alas it came, was like God was reminding me to trust in him. I have had my 3rd period since I MC’ed in Feb.2013 so imagine the torture that started from Nov.2012 (month of conception).
    In all I smile and know God is on the throne and won’t give us more than we can handle. I have a friend who had 5 MCs and no baby, so how can I cry?

  69. TOLUWANIMI

    March 31, 2014 at 3:41 pm

    this story brought back memories,i got pregnant for the first time after 4yrs of marraige with a set of twins,i lost one at 7weeks and lost the other at 18weeks,it’s been anoda 4yrs and i am yet to fall pregnant,nobody deserves to go through this,unfortunately people are not interested in if you have been preggo before but they wanna see the baby,it’s a lonely road,am a ghost of myself,very unattractive and as hard as i try,am not keeping it together at all,but i know the children will come,when i do not know but None shall be barren

    • My August baby that wasn't

      April 1, 2014 at 3:24 pm

      Hugs and kisses, try hard. Do not despise, love your husband and the kids around you. Don’t loose him in the search of children. Like Husby says to me, “its you first then the kids”

  70. Hana

    April 12, 2014 at 12:14 am

    I cried and I am still crying after reading this article and comments from others. I got married in 2010,3months after I missed my period and I was happy. One day.I went to work,I started spotting,cramps,I went for a scan and it was an ectopic pregnancy,I went in for surgery immediately. 5months later,I concieved again,April 2011 to be precis,it wasn’t an easy pregnancy at all,spotting,mild cramps,nausea,vomitting,heart palpitations and terrible headaches. I eventually had him in Jan 2012 and we named him CHUWUEMEKA(God has done something great). When he was 9months,he got ill and eventually passed on 12days after his birthday,Feb 2nd,2013. I thought I will never recover.. I took solace in the word of God and 3months later,I took in again. This pregnancy was so easy for me and a year after the death of son,I had a very beautiful daughter. She came on the 17th of Feb,2014 and we named CHIMAMANDA(God won’t fail).
    Mummy Oluwasanumi,Ur joy will be restored! Ur children shall surround ur table.
    To all the waiting mothers that commented,just believe God for ur babies. Though it tarry,it will surely come!!!.

    • Hannah

      April 12, 2014 at 8:52 pm

      Waoh!! Can’t imagine what u went thru.. Thank God for restoring ur joy

  71. Hannah

    April 12, 2014 at 8:50 pm

    Went thru the same ordeal, January 2013.. It was soooo painful.. I thought my world would end.. But right now, am a proud mother.. Got pregnant again may2013 nd gave birth to a bouncing baby girl in january 2014.. Mummy Oluwasanumi, ur oluwasanumi will come ur way soonest.. Stay strong dear

  72. nunya

    April 27, 2014 at 12:47 pm

    Hmmmm, I have been there and I feel your pain, I got one tube ruptured and therefore taken out, leaving me with one, can I still have kids?

  73. Antenna

    May 7, 2014 at 2:50 pm

    I was 12weeks gone when i spotted blood and i went for a scan and i was told that there was absence of foetal pole(no foetus/ no heartbeat) i went to see my doc and he gave me injections and medications to stop the bleeding and i should redo the scan in another 3 weeks to check for the heart beat of the baby i never waited for 3 weeks cos i was so anxious so i checked back 10days after to redo the scan and YESSSSSSS i saw the foetus but the bleeding never stopped and it was pointing towards OS.i prayed,hoped,fasted that it will stop but it never stopped.so i had to go for evacuation,it was so painful coupled with the fact that my vagina was still very tight.then after 3 days i started bleeding non-stop,i bled for almost 3 weeks felt dizzy,tired,sad coupled with the fact that i still have to go to work and i ve to leave as early as 5am. i still feel down whenever i think abt it but i only seek solace in God…..so please take heart sister.ALLAH is our strength.

  74. Sweet candy

    March 22, 2016 at 3:28 pm

    I wish mummy oluwasanumi comea back to give a part 2. Right now i need God’s mercy.

  75. mimi

    March 23, 2016 at 12:29 pm

    I can feel your pain. I had the same experience last year November 2015 when I lost my 12 weeks pregnancy just like play. Tt took my husband and I one month to accept that our baby was gone. But I give God all the praise because he knows best. I have bounced back believing God for the best and I know that for our shame God will give us double.

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