With the astronomical rise in the advent of technology, social media, and the undeniable easy access to people’s lives more easily than ever, the Importance of effectively dealing with the varying levels of criticisms that we constantly face from co-workers, family, friends and even many at times, our critical mind, cannot be over-emphasized. You see, it’s no exaggeration that the discourse of our life and primarily our happiness and self-confidence is largely dependent on our ability to effectively manage how we react to criticisms.
It honestly saddens me when I hear of people giving up their life long dreams, aspirations and even happiness on the altar of someone else’s criticism(s).
With no intention of being cynical, I still can’t decide which is more exasperating, whether it is the fact that these critics are usually people who do so little or nothing at all for the subject, and their opinions are purely malicious and hypocritical; or the fact that they are usually people who have very little to show for their often “critical minds”.
Without further ado, there are 4 things to always keep in mind when facing criticisms.
Firstly, and most importantly, criticisms are subjective to the speaker’s perceptions & considerations, and are in no way an indication of the absolute truth. You see, regardless of how far up you esteem the speaker, you are still in a position to either accept their criticisms as your truth, or refute it. Richard Branson, as a result of dyslexia, was told at an early age that he would either end up in prison or as a millionaire. Being ultimately one of the most successful business moguls of this age, I need not tell you that regardless of the opinions expressed about him, he chose his destiny himself.
It takes both the sun & rain to grow a flower. There’s no better leverage to toughen and push you to success than the painful echoes of criticisms. I let you into a secret; people are unconsciously motivated & propelled by pain, the soreness of inadequacy and criticisms.
When next you’re criticised in an area you’re truly struggling in, let it not be unto you a stumbling block, but a stepping-stone to your desired result. Let it push you to do better.
You see, what people fail to realize is that success is not a day’s job neither is it earned in a year. It often takes years and years of practice, working, learning, reading and perfecting. The criticisms on your journey to success are just conclusions come too early and your revenge is best served cold, when you’re able to look past the criticisms, and glow when you achieve success.
Third and probably most unpopular, is this golden truth; God does not require the opinions of men in deciding who needs to be blessed. If there’s anything to learn from Toke, it’s that negative criticisms have never been the determinant of how far one could go. Understand this, people will very often and quickly misunderstand you, criticize you on habits and features you have no control over, judge you on your past and call your bluff.
Regardless of all this clamoring for your attention, make your priority before God a clean heart, and being at peace and in-tune with him. Believe this, as far as you’re right with your creator and struggling up the ladder of success with clean hands, you’d end up glowing to the bewilderment of your critics. You would look back and not find them.
Fourth: you’re getting some attention. There is nothing worse than being unnoticed or being considered unworthy of attention. No one will criticize a person or issues, they’re not in someway affected by. Now work on turning the attention/criticisms around by displaying your positives/what you could do.
Finally, as there is no poll that correlates and equates your criticisms to how far you would go, whether it is constructive or purely malicious criticisms, stop letting these trivial & nugatory comments take a toil on you. Instead channel your strength to constant improvement.
Now your turn, share some of your experiences of times you were either constructively or maliciously criticised, and how you got through it.
Tosin Adebola (The Aspiring Sartorialist) is a Fashion, inspirational & Lifestyle blogger at The Aspiring Sartorialist. She is eclectic, very open-minded and particularly enjoys having intelligent, deep and thorough conversations.