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20 Things I Wish I Had Known When I Was 20 – Liz Awoliyi

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Liz AwoliyiMedia personality Liz Awoliyi has shared 20 things she wishes she’d known earlier in her life – especially in her 20s’.

The 20 points span lessons she’s learned in life and love as she has gotten older.

Read her thoughts below.

  1. Trust your instincts, honestly it never lies. The truth is in there somewhere deep down, don’t make excuses for situations or the way people treat you. If people show you who they are, believe them.
  2. Be Kind. Everybody has battles and demons they are fighting.
  3. Worry less about what other people think of you…. People will form an opinion regardless. Just focus on carrying yourself well and being the best you.
  4. Be patient with yourself. Don’t be too busy trying to rush life that you end up making crucial mistakes. Slow and steady wins the race. Life is a marathon and not a sprint.
  5. Your ego is your worst enemy. Honestly life is so much smoother if you can let go of pride.
  6. Choose your words and your battles carefully. Not everything is worth fighting over.
  7. Take Risks. Nothing worth having comes easy.
  8. No man is an island; don’t feel too big to ask for help and advice. “We”, is better than “Me”. Nobody gets to the top alone.
  9. Nobody owes you anything. Nothing is guaranteed to be handed to you. Play hard. Work hard.
  10. Don’t take things personal. Other peoples attitude is a reflection of them and not you, if it’s negative don’t let it demoralize you. Don’t sweat the small stuff.
  11. Live Now – you can get away with more things when you’re single, unattached, there really is less responsibilities.
  12. The way a man treats someone he wants to mess with, and the way he treats girlfriend (Potential wife) material are very different. The signs are there…watch out for them and don’t make excuses.
  13. If a man wants you, nothing can keep him away. If he doesn’t want you, nothing can make him stay.
  14. Everything is by the grace of God. Be prayerful.
  15. There is no such thing as “Luck” – the harder you work; the more success comes your way.
  16. You are not FAT. My weight fluctuates immensely and I spent so many years of my 20’s constantly battling my weight, feeling down. Even when I would be so slim, I couldn’t see it! In your 30s you become a lot more comfortable in your own skin. That being said; watch your diet.
  17. Travel if you can. There will come a time when you wish you had.
  18. The good men and women are more attracted to your confidence and personality than they are to what you look like or what you can offer them – Those are the ones to focus more of your time and energy on.
  19. Someone will break your heart. You will cry and cry and cry. But you’ll get over it! You will put your heart out there again, be more careful and prayerful this time, and you will love again.
  20. To truly love someone, you will know and accept they can’t be perfect, and you will overlook a multitude of their sins knowing full well you’re not perfect either

Are there any nuggets/lessons you wish you’d known earlier?

Photo Credit: Instagram

42 Comments

  1. Alero

    February 3, 2015 at 4:32 pm

    Point 19 got me! So touching…

  2. Jo!

    February 3, 2015 at 4:38 pm

    WTH you wearing gurl?

  3. iyke

    February 3, 2015 at 4:52 pm

    I spent most of my early 20s trying to learn and understand the true meaning of happiness. As a young adult, I created a lot of pain for myself by dwelling on the past and obsessing about the future. The dwelling on the ‘past’ used to be a big problem for me as I was always rehashing the mistakes I made and feeling ashamed, or remembering someone else’s and feeling angry.
    Then it all shifted to my fantasies of that elusive perfect tomorrow, when everything is magically better and the conditions just right for happiness.
    Fast forward to late 20s and early 30s, I LET GO by releasing the past, the need to control the future, fears about what might be coming, insecurities about how I am being perceived, anger over something that hurt me, and guilt over how I hurt someone else.
    Now, as a grown man, I look at things a little differently. I am happy, enjoying my own company, aiming to feel good more often than I feel bad. I celebrate simple pleasures in life – burn a scented candle, make myself self a cup of coffee, work out, embrace a healthy lifestykle, take vacations by going to as many places as I can, making memories and generally being kind to myself.
    #celebrateyourlife

    • Thatgidigirl

      February 3, 2015 at 7:23 pm

      wow iyke! your comment was the cherry on the article….”being kind to myself”. I wish i understood that holding on to the past hurt me more than the actual events. However, I’m glad that i lived out a huge chunk of my twenties, i travelled…..still travelling, ticked off a lot from my bucket list (except the tattoo 😛 ) and i took major risks with my career that paid off.

    • kessilicious

      February 4, 2015 at 7:48 am

      semi i see u

    • me

      February 3, 2015 at 8:07 pm

      I feel like I know you. I don’t know.

    • HAWTTALKWITHTOSAN

      February 3, 2015 at 9:39 pm

      Bro you just wrote a story about me! #Iamsocelebratingme #ichoosetobehappyregardless

    • chugirl

      February 4, 2015 at 9:16 am

      I think you r an interesting individual….. judging from the “simple pleasures” you celebrate.

    • Pat

      February 5, 2015 at 1:40 am

      @iyke Interesting comment 🙂 and your last paragraph is the story of my life now as a grown woman.

  4. Ad

    February 3, 2015 at 5:09 pm

    Nice one

  5. @edDREAMZ

    February 3, 2015 at 5:13 pm

    a.k.a EDWIN CHINEDU AZUBUKO said…
    .
    Thanks for this post abeg…. Chop knuckle babe…. Will post it on my facebook later…
    .
    .
    ***CURRENTLY IN JUPITER***

    • lili

      February 3, 2015 at 6:17 pm

      exactly what came to mind while reading it…posting it on facebook

  6. Joan85

    February 3, 2015 at 5:16 pm

    Why did she change her last name though?

    • Anon

      February 3, 2015 at 10:03 pm

      You know back home, the name yemoja sends shivers down the spine. How can you be taken seriously with a nom de plume like that? Also, in Nigeria having a name like hers may/will open doors. I can swear that when I was growing up in Lagos there was a street in VI or so named Elizabeth Awoliyi after her grandma.

    • MC

      February 4, 2015 at 11:45 am

      Sends shivers down spine, why? what does it mean?

    • o

      February 4, 2015 at 12:36 pm

      @ MC: it means water goddess

    • MC

      February 4, 2015 at 3:01 pm

      Thanks! You learn things everyday. All this time I thought that was her name

    • o

      February 4, 2015 at 10:17 am

      Awoliyi is her ‘real’ last name. Yemoja was a nickname kind of

  7. Icey

    February 3, 2015 at 5:19 pm

    Spot on! So so true!

  8. ada

    February 3, 2015 at 5:28 pm

    this is amazing..and very true…..
    beautiful!

  9. Ada Igonoh

    February 3, 2015 at 5:33 pm

    Spot on! I would also add “don’t be in so much hurry to leave your parents’ house. Enjoy every moment because they are seasonal.” “Discover who you are and what you are all about and be whole in yourself.”

    • imose

      February 4, 2015 at 1:20 am

      Gbam!!!

  10. Clo

    February 3, 2015 at 5:44 pm

    I wish, I wish I had known all too, even though I’m still in my twenties (mid twenties), Some things that reached me since age 19+ drove me into serious Major Depressive Disorder. The way i’ve learned now, i wish i knew the lessons before to not take things so serious. I spent years (stopped in late 2013) going from MDs to Psychiatrists, that people close to me used this in offensive ways and made me more burdened. Thank God I’m now flourishing through wisdom and self love, so I know better things are in prospect for me. No one except ur parents will really care when things happen to u, so don’t ever take nothing too serious, it will troll over ones emotions.

    I Wish i’d know all 20 and even more, but the brain is responsible as it’s fully matured for women at age 25. but my strength was built through my weaknesses! So My people “just swim through and remember to hold ur breath”.

  11. Eyitayo

    February 3, 2015 at 5:48 pm

    sending these to the printer right now…point 9 so touching…thanks Liz

  12. Gorgeous

    February 3, 2015 at 5:52 pm

    What I wish I knew at 20, is that a lot of people are insane or battling one undiagnosed mental illness or the other. Reason why they are incapable of returning your love or help as you would expect. So let them go and know that it had nothing to do with you. How do you save people who do not care that they are in trouble or cannot comprehend it? You will intimately become a victim of that madness.

    • i no send

      February 3, 2015 at 7:02 pm

      wao

    • Pat

      February 5, 2015 at 1:50 am

      @ Gorgeous Oh my goodness! that’s deep, some valid points made though WOW :)!. If I knew u, I would have like to tap into your intellect by having a conversation with u.

  13. zeezee

    February 3, 2015 at 6:34 pm

    No. 19 & 20 tho. Thank you for sharing.

  14. suzzy

    February 3, 2015 at 6:51 pm

    so true………makin a copy for keep

  15. The Lass

    February 3, 2015 at 7:39 pm

    That you so much for these. I turned 20 last year, and I was overcome with a lot of emotion- excitement, anxiety, fear for the new decade, Sigh. I wrote about all those here- wildonworship.wordpress.com/2015/01/15/three-of-the-reasons-why-i-am-creating-my-dream-woman/
    But thank you so much for the wisdom. Sometimes, life feels so overwhelming, we need such pearly of wisdom to guide us through!

  16. The girl who flies planes

    February 3, 2015 at 7:50 pm

    Did she steal this from pinterest or thought catalog?
    Plagiarism!

  17. Theurbanegirl

    February 3, 2015 at 8:23 pm

    Okay

  18. JANE

    February 3, 2015 at 8:44 pm

    There’s always got to be one. Why has the thought got to be negative….Just maybe she put it together herself @thegirlwhofliesplanes ??? There’s an endless catalogue of writings, quotes on the internet, but perhaps these are her own musings…. just maybe you can be positive and take something from it…

    I see Oprah quotes in there like the one about if a man wants you nothing can keep him away.

    Well-done Liz. Loving this, the more mature Liz AWOLIYI. I turned 30 recently too. Bring on the 30’s!!! God bless.

  19. Charming

    February 3, 2015 at 9:01 pm

    So True…

  20. Person

    February 3, 2015 at 9:27 pm

    I wish I knew how mercenary I was in my early 20s. Discovering this at 30 has been a bit disconcerting.

  21. nawtibae

    February 4, 2015 at 7:23 am

    10,3 n 4 nice!

  22. DESTINY AHEAD

    February 4, 2015 at 8:38 am

    Too bad 80% of Parents
    have completely failed in the up-bringing of their children in the right way.

    Virginity is a pride of girls,if any girl lost her OWN in cheap way, her worth is worthless, her value is invalid, her Quality is not qualify to stand proud

    You and i are part of people who allow worst grow in society. We all wish to have sex before right time. Imam’s and pastor’s refuse to preach against worst. Top pastors and imams are in right postion to change things rather than to post; type amen,say yes,write true to recieve what you are not working for on facebook page. 2015 will soon arrivel,just keep typing amen,yest,true and hope for what you have work for.

    If things continue like this Education may change from best legacy to worst legacy because what happens in our high school’s is now out of sence

    Lesbian and gay are now praties in high school which is out of sence. Together we stand divided we fall let join hand’s together and fight against negative thing

    Some parents not performing their duties make worst much in society all online nude site written18+ tell me if 10 year old boi or girl are not access internet through phone before 18+ now once baby boi or girl can operate phone or Electronic remote dont praties private things in there present

    Top facebooker are not help the situation you are one of them i also among of them let join hands together and fight against worst in society

    Facebook is number one place to spread information,updating meaningless status or upload rubbish 4 sake of comment and likes it cant help d situation if you dont have what to do with your M.B check google to read Quotes about success,encourage,motivation,live,laziness,hardworking everything you want to read avalible on google e.g how to end corruption

    Like the page below for more sensible and meaningful status
    m.facebook.com/profile.php?fc=photo_upload_success&id=357135321056909&_rdr

    hi me on whatsapp 00233230534493 if you wish to share simpler with this with whatsapp friend

  23. Oluwachizzy

    February 4, 2015 at 8:46 am

    Thanks so so much for this article, u so made my morning………….seriously, nobody really cares about u except ur parents wen something happens to u……….

  24. chugirl

    February 4, 2015 at 9:25 am

    i turned 30 a couple of months back and i must say, there’s a reawakening of my mind, body and soul. i feel so much confidence within me now more than ever and i forgive even more these days. i am more focused and not perturbed over inconsequential stuff. i believe I’m now more than ever ready to be a mother and a wife…. And i truly know its only going to get better for me….. #anewphaseoflife

  25. meme

    February 4, 2015 at 10:28 am

    i wish i knew that destinies were different and i didn’t have to tow in line with what others were doing,i wish i knew i was distinct, i wish i knew God had already carved a better future for me.Now i know better and i have retraced my steps!

  26. melinda

    February 4, 2015 at 10:32 am

    i so go with all them points, God bless u ma’am….

  27. Ade

    December 25, 2016 at 11:43 pm

    This will be nice if it came from a nice person. I have met her before and she is a mean b**ch. Waiting for the day you will fall in my trap. W***e after servicing all the boys in London

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