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Tolu Falode: Believe In Yourself



It takes a lot for a person to have faith in themselves, their voice, their story, and their truth. It takes a lot more to allow that mumble of hope grow into a resounding note of confidence. It takes energy to face the unpredictable, strength to overcome self-doubt, courage to face the unpredictable to allow your voice to speak.

All these are important elements that combine to create belief.

Belief is described as an acceptance that a statement is true or something exists.

I found this definition so interesting because it reminds me of my own personal journey in belief.

The starting point is acceptance.

So have you accepted yourself? Can you look in the mirror without judging your flaws and failing to see the fire that flames with talents and speaks of bountiful gifts?

Have you accepted that no other person can speak with the same voice, the same capacity, and the same level of utterance as you can?

Have you accepted your truth?

This is the starting point of believing in yourself: self-acceptance.

The truth is, we all struggle with it on a daily basis-our physical and mental flaws always scream for attention-but it is time to stop cowering in silence and rather speak up in courage: in acceptance.

Once you allow acceptance to permeate your passion, you give it the flame to start a fire that leads and births you to the point of your truth.

This is why belief is described first with allowing acceptance and then accepting truth.

What is truth? Well to be honest every person has a different story, a different path and then inevitably a different truth. Your truth is not my own. My truth is a combination of my past, present, and future dreams amongst the daily absorption of relationships with family, friends, experiences with acquaintances-these all add to the truth I carry. This is the same for you.

Don’t be discouraged if someone does not believe your truth. They were never supposed to speak your story.

If you fail to allow your voice to add to the tale of tragedy, triumph, failure, success-you fail to allow your essence to leave a mark on your environment.

You fail to express yourself in the way only you have been gifted to move.

So believe in yourself.

Don’t be discouraged if no one believes in you. The truth is not everyone has faith in everything. Your story, your impact is meant to build and add to another person’s tale. We are all interconnected through our immediate relationships and people and possibilities we are yet to meet-all contained on the path of self-belief.

And if you never accept your truth who will?

Who will speak of your story, who will experience your destiny, who will share your testimony?

Fear usually meets us at the point of courage.

It stares at us with the face of discouragement, the voice of opposition, the smell of failure. But you know what?

Stare back.

Face it with the breath of your truth-it is the most potent force of power you have been given. It contains the essence of life-which is the core of your being. The root of your desires, the journey your path has faced, the tears and laughs and screams and shudders your body has made. Face it.

It will cower in the face of courage because in our courage is our truth and in our truth is our belief. And in our belief is acceptance and what is at the heart of acceptance? Truth-it is who we are.

Take the hand of truth-it struggles for your attention as you drown it with whispers of uncertainty and confusion. It asks for faith, to light your fears, for confidence to speak, for the strength to step forward.

It tells you there is nothing to lose. And once you step into that space of truth, so many powerful things start to happen because you have stepped into your space of influence.

You have come into an agreement with destiny.

And in stepping into influence you access your inner power of confidence and truth. And the universe responds to this shift.

There has been a change, an alteration, a rebalance.

You have stepped into the path of your purpose. You have accepted your voice of truth. And the environment responds to enable you to speak.

You have begun the path of self-belief. A path that will carry you through different nooks and crannies and holes and platforms that give more strength to your voice, more power to your weakness and slowly defeat the threat of fear.

You have stepped into the path of self-belief.

So walk in it!

Photo Credit: Dreamstime | Spotmatik

Tolu Falode is a Relationship Counselor with over 6 years experience counseling couples and singles on having an amazing marriage. She shares dating tips on Instagram: @fantheflame and YouTube: Tolu Falode. Email: [email protected]


  1. Rhonyi

    September 24, 2015 at 4:10 pm

    Am currently trying to believe in myself. It is difficult especially when the world seems to highlight our flaws. This path of belief is leading me to start up a small business, am still scared I might fail but I have resolved I better fail forward than stay stagnant waiting for salary which is crumbs year in and year out.

    • Amaka

      September 25, 2015 at 9:33 pm

      Don’t fear failure. You will do well, you need to depend on God and have faith or else you will never start, years to come you’ll begin to regret especially if you meet someone who dived in. Prepare adequately and do your research. I manage a business right now, it was daunting at first but God blessed me with a good mentor and I always ask God to help me, yes I need to do my part, focus, work very hard, dress smartly, attend conferences etc

  2. Tosin

    September 24, 2015 at 7:17 pm

    Amen. Aaaamin.

  3. Bae

    September 24, 2015 at 8:04 pm

    Nice one Tolu, I’m always inspired by your write-ups . Keep it up !

  4. carina

    September 24, 2015 at 10:18 pm

    Nice one Tolu! for fiction stories.

  5. ...

    September 25, 2015 at 4:11 am

    Nice one sista T!

  6. Akaahan Terungwa

    September 29, 2015 at 4:29 am

    Hi Tolu,

    Having the courage to face life and stare it in the face with unblinking determination is hard – very hard. However, it becomes way easier when you do not have any choice but do so…this is the point when you’ve got nothing to lose but a whole new world to gain!

    I sincerely like the way you write 🙂

    Do enjoy the day!

    Akaahan Terungwa

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