#BN2016Epilogues: This Year, Todun Found Her Voice & Sang For God

It’s that time of the year when members of the BellaNaija community come together to bond over shared experiences in the last 12 months. As with the previous editions of this series, we put out a call for you to send us your stories. {Click here if you missed it} To catch up on the previous stories shared this year, click HERE.

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“Didn’t you say you wanted to join the choir?”
“Yes. But…”
I was doing it again, making up an excuse. My husband shook his head with a smile.

I love music! Anyone that’s close to me knows this. My phone music libraries are ever dope. Rap, R&B, Blues, Pop…you name it. If it sounds great, I love it already. But it’s even better when the lyrics are beautiful too. I love music so much my then-boyfriend already made a list of my favourite songs and contacted a saxophonist to serenade me the night he would propose at our favourite hangout. His plans later changed when I unknowingly dropped a hint that I would love a very private proposal… but I digress.

I joined my secondary school choir about fifteen years ago, learnt a few songs, but eventually stopped going for rehearsals. I can’t remember exactly why, but I do remember the fear that gripped me the day the choir mistress mentioned I would lead a ministration. I cried my eyes out when I got home, wondering why she would pick me out of everyone in the whole choir. It didn’t occur to me that she thought I would do a great job. I thought she just wanted to bring me unnecessary attention, probably because she knew how shy I was.

Years later, I joined my home church choir, but only for about one or two ministrations. I had to travel for holidays and then NYSC, so I was barely around.

I completed the service and began work. A few times I toyed with the idea of joining the choir of the church I attended then, but as usual, I had my excuses. I wondered if/how I would afford the weekly choir uniforms, if/how I could balance work with church, and all.

In December 2015, when the hubby reminded me about my interest in our current church choir, I quickly pointed out that they were preparing for the Christmas concert and they probably wouldnt let me join so late. Even if they let me, how could I possibly learn all the songs they had rehearsed for months within a few weeks?

Imagine my horror when after the following church service, my beloved marched straight to the choirmaster to tell him i wanted to join them and CM said it was okay! And then began the cramming. I don’t know how many new songs I had to learn in December 2015. It was crazy. I wanted to give up, I told myself I couldn’t do it, who was I to think I could? But guess what, I did it! Singing in that concert made me realize I could actually achieve whatever I wanted to. But that was only the beginning.

2016, I can boldly say, was the year I served God. I remain in the choir today, not just because I love music or singing (I could as well just sing in the shower), but because I have never felt so fulfilled in my life. Plus I’ve realized that serving God does come with great blessings. I have had to practically study some lyrics alongside my masters courses, and yet my GPA remains perfect. I have had to combine singing not only with school but also a new marriage, yet my home remains blessed.

I must point out that it’s not just about knowing more Gospel songs or learning to sing better, but through my service to God, I have come to know Him in a more personal way, and I know this because daily I improve in my walk with him and it reflects in my thoughts, my prayers, even my relationships with people. I’m not exactly where I want to be yet, but everyday I feel how much closer I’m getting and it’s a wonderful feeling!

I’m so grateful that God found me worthy of use in 2016, even when my voice shook, when I missed a line or didn’t hit a note. I’m grateful for the people He sent my way to encourage me and to teach me. As I prepare for this year’s concert, especially the beautiful song I’ll be leading, I’m reminded that for all the wonderful blessings God has bestowed on me, the very least that I can do is to praise and worship Him!

Photo Credit: Jason Stitt | Dreamstime.com