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BN TV: What does it mean to be a Feminist in Africa? WATCH Tewa Onasanya & Glory Edozien on “Moments – Girls Talk”

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This episode of Moments Nigeria Girls Talk is all about ‘The African Feminist’. In recognition of this year’s International Women’s day, the ask the question –What does it mean to be called a feminist in Africa.

The guests are Exquisite Magazine CEO, Tewa Onasanya and the founder of Inspired by Glory, Glory Edozien.

Watch below.

11 Comments

  1. Freda

    March 10, 2017 at 8:44 am

    You cannot pick and choose when you want to be equal. If you think the man’s sole responsibility is to provide money for his home, then by that logic men SHOULD be paid more. You cant eat your cake and have it Tewa. That’s selfish. Women as much as men need to change their mentality. It should be up to you and your spouse not society, to decide roles based on strengths, resources etc and also understand that this a fluid dynamic that can change because that’s life. people get fired or get promotions, or have triplets .
    feminism is advocacy for fairness irrespective of gender. and this is in regard to everything, from pay, landlord refusing to let to single women to adultery issues( when a man cheats its ok because he’s a ”man” but when a woman does it she’s a disgrace and a pariah because we are not all humans that can make mistakes).
    Understand that Men and women are EQUAL but not the SAME. In any type of relationship (marriage, friendship, business etc) each person/gender has its own strengths and weaknesses and they compliment each other because they are COMPATIBLE & one cannot work optimally without the other, Just as your husband cannot bear children without you Tewa.
    The real issue is society believes that being the “provider” has more value than being the “nurturer” and has automatically assigned these roles to the man and woman respectively so of cause women like Tewa believe they are less than.
    Ephesians 5 says the husband is supposed to love his wife as christ loved the church and gave himself up for her. meaning the husband is submitting himself to his wife as much as she is submitting to him. Get it? Submission here is not slavery or relinquishing control. Submission is love.

    • Engoz

      March 10, 2017 at 9:56 pm

      I have written your first paragraph one billion times on BN, but the Nigerian woman chooses to be ignorantly stupid no matter how educated. Thanks for the reiteration. ONCE AGAIN, WOMEN CANNOT ARGUE THE MAN BE THE SOLE PROVIDER AND EXPECT EQUAL PAY IN THE WORK PLACE. If men are the sole providers in the homes, it makes all logical sense for men to be given automatic access to employment opportunities and should be more likely to enrolled into academic institutions before any woman. Feminists have fought for female rights in the workplace that today companies have to fulfill a quota of women in the workplace, and then these bunch of gluttons turn around and say ‘man should carry most of the financial responsibilities’. Bunch of thieves! We need to kick these UNGRATEFUL women OUT OF THE WORKFORCE.

    • Jennietobbie

      March 11, 2017 at 1:59 am

      ?????? I CRINGED while watching this. Say whaaatttt? You want equal pay but you still want him to be the chief breadwinner of the home because “you are saving for the rainy day.” How about from that 50-50 cut, yall save equally for the rainy day. No? My goodness!!! I couldn’t believe the effrontery. Switch the roles and walk a mile on that let me know how it feels. Feminism demands equality in every ramifications so spare me where you are a fan and where you shout foul. Thank you GLORY!!! I wish the let you shed more light on your insight about this issue. Moments should have another segment on this issue. I demand equal pay at work and equality at home. If I am paying for the fees, you are taking care of the mortgage. If you are a master chef, I will be your most sparkling tide washed office shirt.!!! Feed that “his money is our money and my money is mine” mentality to the birds. I’m not here for it!??????

    • ego

      March 11, 2017 at 7:32 am

      “Its not the law that needs to change but its infact the women!”

    • Keyna

      March 11, 2017 at 1:35 am

      Can Nigeria have more of you please?. You really get it.

    • S

      March 18, 2017 at 7:57 am

      Glory, thanks for being a wise woman. Please don’t let these marriage ninjas reduce your opinion. Marriage my ass. As if half the married people know what a healthy marriage is… Rubbish.
      Michelle, I am so disappointed in you. Upon all your foneh and nice clothes, you cannot understand ordinary feminism. I wouldn’t even waste my precious time on Tewa. She’s a lost soul that cannot even explain herself.
      Balance and her princess diaries. Grow up girl.

    • S

      March 18, 2017 at 7:57 am

      BOLANLE*

  2. Nelo

    March 10, 2017 at 9:48 am

    I watched this episode last night and was impressed by Glory as she came into the discussion informed about feminism. Now for Tewa onasanya, I think shes confused on what feminism is. And it is okay to be a woman and not agree with feminism. She kept saying she supports feminisn in the work place but not at home cos the dynamics r different. Interestingly she could not describe those dynamics.

    Listen I am married and a feminist and some of the ways that plays out at home is my hubby should also be the caregiver and watch the kids without begging him like hes doing me a favour. I work and as such I also contribute financially at home. I cant say I have won that battle at home but I am being concious in raising feminist kids both male and female. I once had a boss tell me ‘if I was ur husband I wont let u work cos of d kids’. This is acceptable to him cos hes proud to tell everyone he stopped his wife from working. If as a woman, I choose to stop working, it should be my decision not forced on me. So its hard to pick and choose which aspects of equality u want to identify with.

    You are either a feminist or u are not.

  3. www.stylelately.wordpress.com

    March 10, 2017 at 11:19 pm

    I’m not a feminist and that perfectly okay. That’s one thing women don’t understand, you can’t choose to be a feminist where it matches your perspective and they deny it where it doesn’t. I completely agree to what glory said last night. You can’t fight for equal rights for both men and women in the work place, that man you are fighting to get equal pay with may or may not be the sole provider in his home while you store yours in the bank and claim to be saving for the rainy days but the man pays all the damn bills. You can as well not say you are a feminist at all instead of taking sides

  4. Nitomeya

    March 13, 2017 at 10:15 am

    This was an interesting discussion, all the parties involved made good points and some off points. There is a difference between the home front and the work/society. At home I am expected to love my wife as Christ loves the church. I am not expected to extend that same love to the women in my work place. The rules in my home is different from those at my work place. At work I follow the rules set there but whilst at home I follow the rules set by my family.

  5. olanna&odenigbo

    March 14, 2017 at 12:57 am

    Well my own is kukuma weird then…..cos I am not even a proponent of equal pay just for gender sake…. I propose -equal work for equal pay’…… if you’re a Manager on some level and unable to deliver competitively, then sorry you shouldn’t earn the same as those who can. so if men earn at that level and you as a woman want same, then bring the goods…If in reality you cant, then don’t be sorry for it…rather look for areas of your life where you’re winning and possibly grow that….compete to your strengths, and take pride in that. Reality is, the shift is gonna take a long while cos its hard to move people out of comfort zones, and many have adapted to maybe making deals with men over women or things like that….. chances may be narrow, but if you believe you can go for it, then why let me stop you… If you want equal pay and equal home, ask ‘high income earners’ or ‘ideal home/family owners… the real cost of their incomes/homes?….ask yourself- .are you willing/able to pay the price of operating at that level whether in the work place or at home?….The people you see who ‘have it all’ didn’t get it all at the same time….there were different priorities per time, and over the long run…some even out

    What caught my attention with your comment and Freda’s I believe is the logic that if men are breadwinners/sole providers, then it automatically makes sense to pay them more in the workplace…. are you guys kidding? So you believe it makes sense that the reward for my day’s work should be affected by who is buying garri and paying rent in another person’s household???? My colleague can deliver below par and get paid more than I do cos he is paying his own rent?….na me send am message?
    That’s like saying that a domestic help automatically entitled your house cos he/she spends the most time in it and provides the most care for it OR worse like saying parent citizens get better benefits- e.g. tax exclusion- as compensation for bearing children… wont you punch someone that says that to you?
    How is their personal choice my cup of tea??? abeg o…don’t even go there.

    You CANNOT tie a debate that involves the public i.e workplace/communities/societies etc to the personal choices of people. That’s why work places have guidelines and societies have laws/constitutions—-when you walk in the door, you do not come to preach or teach your personal beliefs/choices. That’s not what you get paid for, you get paid for contributing your bit towards a wider vision; and doing so in a manner that is respectful of others’ and their sensibilities.. The wider vision/common good comes before who is paying rent in your home…..and as far as the common good is concerned…I believe peers competing on the same level and delivering comparable results should be rewarded equally. What you decide to do with your own compensation is not my concern to carry. So please miss me with that your logic….it is total fallacy!

    Honestly, I don’t know enough of the ins and out of the feminist debate, but beyond the fight for equality for me should be a fight for Justice/Fairness…..which means that the shortcoming of either gender/belief/age group/etc must be adequately compensated for, to provide a level operating and rewarding field/society for both all… That way, how you choose to conduct your personal sphere and relationships would be btw you and who it affects,, in so far as they have the ability to fulfil the basic requirements of being in such a relationship. That’s the beauty of law and when law works…to account for all sides and balance out the injustices.

    My REAL challenge with Naija and the Feminist movement is that our relational culture is deeply engrained in religion+culture (all of them) which for the most part have been explained/taught, and often conveniently used as tool to keep women seeing themselves and their roles/importance as second place/class…only a minor few apply differently. That is why a stay at home mother is of less value than a bread winning Dad- however when tables turn, and she is the bread winner, we still retain the same cultural expectations on her. This is the reason the above discussion seems very conflicting cos we want to pay mind to both aspects -the evolving woman vs her conditioning….. You know, embrace feminism but not too much; pursue that goal but not too much, do this or that- but not too much…..we are used to operating with and within boundaries and no matter how divergent our views/beliefs/desires…..the part of us that seeks societal validation will always rise up to tell us who we can and cannot be… THAT IS THE REAL CHALLENGE….. How many of us can rise above society’s voice?

    It just occurred to me, that the last paragraph was also a note-to-self by the way…. I needed to hear that cos I achieved some feat I worked hard for, and spent precious time hoping on others to validate it before I can enjoy it, rather than just enjoy the glory…and I sense more like it coming, and by God, I will rise and embrace it all, and I wont stop loving men while at it!. .

    I didn’t set out to write an epistle, so pele.

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